It’s the Turtle Wagon! Goddammit. My nostalgia for the Ninja Turtles is powerful indeed, and it’s shit like this that’s going to dull my senses and make me forget about just how bad the first Bay/Liebesman movie was. But it’s the Turtle Wagon! I wonder if it’ll shoot small pizza discs that smell like tarragon. Yea, I had all the toys. Bay also posted an image of the Polaris Slingshot, which doesn’t appear to be Turtle-related in any way, as it’s a very real and very dumb tricycle motorcycle that rich guys buy when they can’t have sex anymore. I’m assuming Michael Bay is a stockholder in the company or something, as Deadline reports (threatens?) that the Polaris Slingshot might show up in another one of his upcoming films, as well as TMNT 2.

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Anyway, I’m hyped for the Turtle Wagon (cleverly disguised by hand-painted signage for the “Tartaruga Brothers” uh…waste removal? I don’t think New York City has privatized waste removal, so that might raise some eyebrows, and don’t quote me on this, but I think there also may be some Italians living in New York, and they might wonder why there’s a privatized waste removal service called the “Turtle Brothers,” especially considering the events of the last film…aaaaanyway). Get the Mutant Module in there and I might consider seeing this. Get the Technodrome in there and I’ll be first in line on opening night.

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