STUDIO: Warner Bros. (BUY IT FROM CHUD.COM)
MSRP: $35.99
RATED: PG-13
RUNNING TIME: 113 minutes
SPECIAL FEATURES:

  • Digital Copy
  • Liam Neeson: Known Action Hero
  • Unknown: What is Known?

THE TEAM:
Jaume Collet-Serra (director).
Liam Neeson. Aidan Quinn. Frank Langella. January Jones. Bruno Ganz. Diane Kruger (stars).
Oliver Butcher. Stephen Cornwell. Didier Van Cauwelaert (writers).

THE PITCH:
Everyone was surprised about Taken. Hurry let’s get Liam in another thriller set in Europe.

THE REVIEW:

Unknown is so formula I expected a baby to drink it.

Liam Neeson plays Dr. Martin Harris who arrives in Berlin with his trophy wife (January Jones) for a medical conference but upon heading to the airport to retrieve a forgotten briefcase he’s in a car accident that messes with his mind. He awakens and suddenly his entire life is gone. Aidan Quinn is Dr. Martin Harris, married to his wife and attending his medical conference. No one believes him and mysterious people are following him. He hooks up with the cabbie (Diane Kruger, the unlikeliest cab driver ever?) involved in his wreck and begins to piece the mystery together all the while dealing with the Eurotrash villains who want to silence him.

What follows is an amazingly generic bit of business from the folks at Dark Castle (Joel Silver’s company we try our damndest to love) and the normally interesting director Jaume Collet-Serra (Orphan, House of Wax). There’s not a moment in the film that feels fresh or interesting and though Neeson is always fun to watch he’s given nothing to do. Even the presence of Downfall‘s Bruno Ganz can’t help matters. Dr. Martin Harris ends up being exactly what we expect him to be and when the conspiracy is revealed it’s even more bland than we could have expected.

We should have known. Aidan Quinn is hand-carved from a gigantic rectangle of bland and Frank Langella exists exclusively in thrillers to be paternal and duplicitous.

(NRASIYESAT) Not Really A Spoiler If You’ve Ever Seen A Thriller: He dies. And if you want a perfect example of an actor looking bored as he dies there is no better example than this. Frank Langella didn’t phone his performance in for his death scene. He had his assistant text it.

It’s a PG-13 thriller with no great set pieces or kills. It treads no new territory and seems very content to rest in deep divots of familiarity. It’s not even all that stylish, embodying that silver hue so many movies adopt when set in this region of the world. Liam Neeson deserves better surroundings and he deserves a cast that’ll made the time he’s not onscreen interesting. Instead January Jones looks as if she’s baffled to be acting, Diane Kruger has invested no energy into making her character (a pivotal one) resonant, and god damn Aidan Quinn is boring. He wants to be Jeroen Krabbé but why would anyone want to be Jeroen Krabbé? A huge chunk of nothing.

Unknown is so formula I expected a baby to drink it.

ITS PLACE IN THE PANTHEON:

It’s outside the Pantheon panhandling.

KEEPER, RENTER, or AVOIDER?

Avoid this golem. It’s silly putty someone rubbed off on another thriller and all that’s left is the faded and one-dimensional inverse.

IN CLOSING:

It’s the Jeroen Krabbé of Berlin-based thrillers. And the special features are pretty Jeroen Krabbé too.

Rating:
★☆☆☆☆

Out of a Possible 5 Stars