Do you have (or want to have) kids? - Page 2

I'm not a "child" person.

I'm the father of three step-kids and a rockin young daughter of five. I hit fatherhood when I married my second wife at the age of 39. I now have hair turning whiter by the day and high blood pressure.

Because teen stepdaughters are the devil.

There are times when I think that the problems with the older three shouldn't have been mine. The youngest of the three is pretty messed up (bi-polar, ADHD, ODD, clinical depression, mental processing speed of 8 on a scale of 1-100) and he's currently in a residential facility near where we live. The middle daughter is a hellion....sneaking boys into her room at 3am at the age of 14. Their father is a fucker, and has really failed as a human being when it comes to anyone in his life. But each of them has so many strengths that without them I'd be living a smaller and shallower life.

But in the act of giving them my heart and soul, I find I'm a better and happier man than I've ever been. It's in the facing the challenges and working through them that I can feel myself growing in ways I could have never comprehended had I not made the decision to be their dad. And along the way I've sort of found ways to teach them what I could about the things I feel are cool. Middle daughter loves Motown thanks to me. Older daughter is into Hitchcock movies due to my influence. They all have a wider appreciation of music genres and artists they'd have never heard of by now.

And my angel....well....fuck. She's just the shit. Talented and smart and curious about the world and her place in it. I am so totally in love that it hurts sometimes. She got a guitar for her fifth birthday...and greets me at the door each night to play "pretty songs" that she writes. And each night it makes me feel glad to be alive to be able to sit there and be told "no...that's not right daddy...you have to do it different" as she bashes the open strings through her little Marshall practise amp set on stun and sings "Mommies are the best, but they sometimes go insane"



At this point, I feel so far ahead of the game that it's beyond my comprehension how I made it this far without my kids. All of them. I'm blessed beyond measure.

You're a good man.

Except for the Hello Kitty guitar, that is.

Don't have them, never want them, and prefer never to be in the same room as them if at all possible. Money and free time are beautiful things to have.

Also, I can't wait for Devin to respond in this thread.

1 year old daughter, best thing that ever happened to me.

I've never been so exhausted but I love every minute of it

Too scared to fuck them up, both my parents have died so there's no pressure from that arena, and flying to the Caribbean or Hawaii whenever the fuck I want is also awesome.

Lots of "I can't imagine my life without them" sentiments here. I think I can help:





KIDDING. Some of you sound like you're having a great time. My wife and I often think that if we decide we "have" to have a kid, there are plenty to adopt, so not really worried about the ticking clock.

Why does the response to this remind me of the opening scene of Idiocracy?

Because it's true.

teledork, adorable. Even, er, especially with the Hello Kitty guitar.

Both shit on the floor, too.

I have one daughter, but I would like to have more children. Even though she lives in another state with my ex-wife I try to get to see whenever I can.

I love being a dad.

As a long-time musician, I know two things:

1. When the mom LOVES Hello kitty, you buy the hello kitty. At this point, the only reason I haven't bought her the Hello Kitty vibrator is because the oldest has a hobby of "finding things" behind closed doors and in dark places. Hello Kitty sealed the deal as far as mom was concerned.

2. When the daughter adores pink to the exclusion of every other color ("Daddy, don't you think white would be better if it had pink on it?"), then you go with pink.

Add in the fact that it's a half-sized strat and she'll grow into it sooner rather than later, and the fact that she lets daddy "borrow" the little Marshall for recording purposes, I consider the whole exercise a triumph of the first order.

I figure it's about three years down the road before we talk about using black electrical tape to make a Hello Van Halen variation on the guitar.

My son will be six months old on the 11th. He's definitely the best thing that's ever happened to me. We'd like to have a girl next and be done, personally, I want to wait at least another year and a half (for financial reasons), she would like things a little faster, we'll see what happens. Kid's pretty darned cute though.....

musta got it from his mama....

First imminent. Father stoked. Pants shat. Stay tuned.

Most awesome post ever.

C'mon, it's gotta at least be on the short list.

Actually, I'm kind of partial to "Jakers: The Adventures of Piggly Winks" Myself. And I've noticed the lil' guy's ears perk up when he hears the theme music start up, so there's hope for him.

And IMO, Sprout wins over Noggin because they got Sesame Street. Sesame Street's fucking huge. . .

The part of my life I'm most looking forward to is raising a kid. I really see that as being a really rewarding experience. Honestly, I cant wait.

Time Warner Cable has all these "On Demand" channels where you can call up shows from a specific channel and watch them anytime you want (pretty much like having a second DVR except its preloaded with Time Warner Cable's Choices).

I personally watch Anime Network on Demand alone. Most of the time we are using the Kids/Preschool on Demand for the Noggin channel. Its really great. I spent last night watching an hour of Franklin the turtle before bedtime.

Are you kidding? There's no way you should feel the need to defend that fantastically awesome picture. I'm with Chavez on his assessment.

MissZooey and I are currently childless, but when we do have kid (no "s" - we've agreed it's going to be just one), any Daveling of either gender is almost definitely going to end up with a pint-sized musical instrument in hand (Miss Kitty optional).

I would like to add that we weren't in total agreement on the number until we stayed with Dave's cousin over the holidays. Cousin and wife have two children, who are five and seven. Christmas morning was all it took to get Dave to nod solemnly and mouth the word "one" whenever would hold up an index finger and glance at one of the sugar-fueled blurs streaking around the room.

Oh Here is another great reason to have kids (and an excuse to show off the family)

The dreaded family photos. Expect to do these at least twice a year.



I'm ready for the who's kid is cuter war!

Dave, you should get your broodling a tiny little sousaphone, or an oboe.

Well, there will be a drum kit (no way around this), a guitar, and probably a piano, so why not a sousaphone?

Or a theremin.

Kids love theremins.

Who doesn't love a nice theremin, though?

Kids manages to make the most annoying noises out of the most simple things. God knows how fast a theremin-wielding child would send his parents into madness.

Nobody I'd wanna be friends with, that's who.

A friend of mine once said, & I wholeheartedly agree, that the world would be a better place if everyone learned to play a musical instrument. I won't force him into anything, but if he wants one, he's got it. My wife's been after me to pick up my bass & start playing again (I've neglected it since law school), because she thinks it's cool, and hopefully the kid will too.

And the best way to encourage kids to play instruments is to play in front of them.

And to answer the question, I'm in the other category: want children, can't have them.

My parents really wanted me to play an instrument, too (They started me on the piano, and I took lessons for around six years, after which I began playing guitar and trombone). Their solution to the "noisy musician kid" problem was that my Dad built me a soundproof room in the basement where I could practice. He stapled egg cartons to the walls, and even built a little slot into the ceiling of the room so that Mom could lower down my daily ration bucket, and the floor was a grate that Dad found (i.e. stole) from the pig farm across the street. It was a lifesaver since there was no bathroom in the cellar and I was pretty much locked in there most days except for holidays, every other birthday, and beating day, which I understand is a pretty typical nowadays. They also moved all my stuff (i.e. bed, broken teddy ruxpin, and water bowl) from the utility room under the stairs to the new room.

Was this a music room or the room where you would do Buffalo Bill reenactments?

My Dad found my teddy ruxpin in a child's grave. It did nothing but shriek profanities.

You breeders keep this shit up, and I'm gonna start a cat thread.

BELIEVE IT.

Those without kids are missing out on a very important financial strategy. Have one kid, and focus their entire life on either an extremely lucrative intellectual endeavor (think neurosurgery, biotech weaponry) or Golf (think Earl Woods).

Easily the best retirement plan strategy you can have since the Roth 401k.

Not a guaranteed moneymaker, though. My parents tried that with me, and I came home with a film studies degree.

Have fun living on cat food, mom!

Shit, why not all three and have you own version of Buckaroo Banzai?

Do it! Who doesn't love Caturday?

Well, you have to be fair to the kid. At the age of two-ish, you spread out a bunch of sporting goods, and the one they play with the most they have force-fed on a daily basis for the next sixteen years. Unless they're a lefty. In which case they're learning how to throw a baseball immediatemente. Or, unless they're a girl, in which case you begin saving for the eventual wedding/dowry.

The easiest way to get into college is to learn how to kick a football. Whenever I mention this, my wife believes I'm joking.

Please don't. We don't need to unleash a flood of lolcat memes on the boards.

Also, cats generally suck.

Bring it, Singer! I've got kids and cats! Start a goldfish thread too and I'll be all over that shit!

There's 419,000 Google hits for "cat lolz". Please don't make Jacob angry.

My son inherited my ambidextrous condition, so baseball was a done deal from the beginning. We're still keeping up daily golf practice in case of a base running injury.

There's no reason you can't get creative with the family portrait! Check out this one: http://www.flickr.com/photos/dhkong/166601927/

I'm in no hurry to have kids. The last two generations of my family have a significant history of alcoholism and mental illness, to the point that I think it would be borderline unethical to roll the dice with children of my own. If I ever get the itch to give up free time, disposable income, and uninterrupted sleep, I'll adopt.

This was pretty fucked up, but funny. If I ever have kids...

Don't have any, never want them. I dodged a massive bullet when my wife ran off with my best friend so I'll never be getting married again either.

Glad to see there's a couple of other guys with the same idea as me. I'd get a vasectomy tomorrow if I could find a Dr to do it and if I could summon the courage.

Also, you have a baby nowadays and it's just a weapoon for the mother to use against you financially and emotionally we she decides to screw someone else.

My girlfriend and I have been together for 2 years and she's 100% clear on where I stand on this.

Never getting married again, never having kids.

I want a Sportscar one day...anything that gets inbetween me and that best beware.

My wife and I have been volunteering to baby-sit our friends kids (10 mos and 3 mos) as sort of "test runs" - no problem because she doesn't feel much like doing anything and I'm broke these days.

We had our friend's daughter over the other night (the 3 mo) and she was getting a bit fussy, so I took her down into my man-cave to watch the lava lamp (note: kids seem to LOVE lava lamps); while she was diggin' on that, I put in Pink Floyd:Live at Pompeii for ol' Chavez to watch - next thing I know her eyes are GLUED to the tv. She was totally into the whole thing, totally loved it.

I thought that was pretty cool.

Cool shot. I haven't made it to a "real" studio with my wife and child. Not sure why. Fear of being in front the lens, maybe. I've done a decent job of documenting my daughter's first years but only have a few shots of her with her mom or with me and none with all 3 of us. She's a bit hard to get anything but candids of now.

Nice PS work on flickr, WayDen.