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Me and the missus split up - Page 3

post #101 of 126
8/15/07 at 7:47pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Will Kane
If you two were married, eenin would be legally bound to tell you stories whenever you demand it.
I like to think that MissZooey and I are pretty open, but eenin's religious beliefs are pretty well-documented, and I doubt that gay polygamy is in the cards. For more information, please visit the Religion forum for an awe-inspiring eenin experience.
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post #102 of 126
8/15/07 at 8:00pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by DaveB
I like to think that MissZooey and I are pretty open, but eenin's religious beliefs are pretty well-documented, and I doubt that gay polygamy is in the cards. For more information, please visit the Religion forum for an awe-inspiring eenin experience.
I've made it a point to avoid Religious forums on the internet. I already weep for the future enough as it is.
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post #103 of 126
8/15/07 at 8:04pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by DaveB
...but eenin's religious beliefs are pretty well-documented, and I doubt that gay polygamy is in the cards. ...
Which is too bad, really, because he and Jabba would make an excellent couple.
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post #104 of 126
8/15/07 at 8:08pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ryan S~
So, was this before or after he beat up an Hasidic Jew after watching A History of Violence?
This is not the disturbing creepy member of the forums you are looking for.

Hint: Rhymes with stunk.

As in my god those dead bodies stunk the place out.
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post #105 of 126
8/15/07 at 8:19pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chris Miller
If your post has kept him from telling more stories, so help me God.....
I'm terribly sorry, I seem to have let my silly mind run away with me in that post. My apologies. What I meant to say is:

I'm sure you've got even *better* stories than this, eenin! Keep 'em comin!
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post #106 of 126
8/15/07 at 8:37pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Spike Marshall
This is not the disturbing creepy member of the forums you are looking for.

Hint: Rhymes with stunk.

As in my god those dead bodies stunk the place out.
I just assumed that the friend eenin was talking about was fabfunk.But now that you mention it you don't have to pay alimony to a corpse so....
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post #107 of 126
8/15/07 at 10:36pm
Only one of their many advantages.
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post #108 of 126
8/16/07 at 8:18am
Thread Starter 
How did this thread turn into what it now is? I'm not complaining, not one bit, but it does kinda remind me of this....

Ron Burgundy: Boy, that escalated quickly... I mean, that really got out of hand fast.
Champ Kind: It jumped up a notch.
Ron Burgundy: It did, didn't it?
Brick Tamland: Yeah, I stabbed a man in the heart.
Ron Burgundy: I saw that. Brick killed a guy. Did you throw a trident?
Brick Tamland: Yeah, there were horses, and a man on fire, and I killed a guy with a trident.
Ron Burgundy: Brick, I've been meaning to talk to you about that. You should find yourself a safehouse or a relative close by. Lay low for a while, because you're probably wanted for murder.
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post #109 of 126
8/16/07 at 9:05am
Thread Starter 
I'd also like to add a big thank you to all the kind words and encouragement people have sent me.

I think I'm doing fine, but its nice to know that virtual strangers give a damn. Thanks guys and gals.
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post #110 of 126
8/16/07 at 10:41am
Quote:
Originally Posted by sackley
How did this thread turn into what it now is? I'm not complaining, not one bit, but it does kinda remind me of this....

Ron Burgundy: Boy, that escalated quickly... I mean, that really got out of hand fast.
Champ Kind: It jumped up a notch.
Ron Burgundy: It did, didn't it?
Brick Tamland: Yeah, I stabbed a man in the heart.
Ron Burgundy: I saw that. Brick killed a guy. Did you throw a trident?
Brick Tamland: Yeah, there were horses, and a man on fire, and I killed a guy with a trident.
Ron Burgundy: Brick, I've been meaning to talk to you about that. You should find yourself a safehouse or a relative close by. Lay low for a while, because you're probably wanted for murder.

We were just trying to cheer you up, sackley. I hope it worked.

I'd like to take this opportunity to propose that the new motto of the CHUD forums should be "Boy, that escalated quickly..."
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post #111 of 126
8/16/07 at 11:46am
Thread Starter 
Seconded.
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post #112 of 126
8/16/07 at 11:50am
Did you get your stuff, sackley? I hope it was all intact.
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post #113 of 126
8/16/07 at 12:10pm
Thread Starter 
Not yet. Basically, I owe her £250, and she's not gonna get dollar one of it til I get all my stuff out and its all in one piece. Otherwise, zilcho. Its cold hearted, but she's holding all the cards.

She's moved out into her parents' place for now (round the corner from her place), so the house is empty, but I don't have a key for the new lock that had to be put on.

Good news though: with less than a week of looking, i've found somewhere to live and will start filling paperwork tomorrow. Should move in first week of September.

More good news: I got a 3 GRAND(!!!) pay rise this week, with effect of next month's pay, back dated to cover August as well, so I get a bit of a cash boost come the end of September, just when I'll need it.
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post #114 of 126
8/16/07 at 12:23pm
Well, shit. It's God's way of saying, "Way to kick that bitch to the curb, sackley."
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post #115 of 126
8/16/07 at 1:16pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by sackley
Good news though: with less than a week of looking, i've found somewhere to live and will start filling paperwork tomorrow. Should move in first week of September.
You didn't meet someone in a coffee shop and decide to pretend you're a professional couple in order to get a flat, did you? Because if you did, just be aware that comic hijinx will ensue.
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post #116 of 126
8/16/07 at 1:29pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Owen
Well, shit. It's God's way of saying, "Way to kick that bitch to the curb, sackley."
Absolutely. Congratulations on the new place and the big ol' buttwad of moolah, sackely. May that kind of good luck continue when it comes time to get your things out of the old house.
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post #117 of 126
8/16/07 at 3:45pm
Thread Starter 
Cheers!

Y'all are okay in my book. If you ever find yourself in Manchester, let me know. The zimas are on me.
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post #118 of 126
8/16/07 at 3:54pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by sackley
Cheers!

Y'all are okay in my book. If you ever find yourself in Manchester, let me know. The zimas are on me.
Zimas?? I'm beginning to see why your relationship didn't work out.
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post #119 of 126
8/16/07 at 4:18pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by B_MetalSucks
Zimas?? I'm beginning to see why your relationship didn't work out.
Hey, give the man break. Maybe they don't sell Bartles & Jaymes in Manchester.
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post #120 of 126
8/16/07 at 4:45pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by jonvoight's car
Hey, give the man break. Maybe they don't sell Bartles & Jaymes in Manchester.
You've got a point. Zima may be man-booze in his neck of the woods.
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post #121 of 126
8/17/07 at 4:52am
Thread Starter 
Hey, I don't drink the shit, I'm a tequila man.

I just assumed you did, heheheh...
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post #122 of 126
8/17/07 at 12:16pm
Where's DaveB's eenin stories, dammit? It's fuckin Friday and I need some eenin stories to carry me through the weekend.
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post #123 of 126
8/17/07 at 7:00pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ryan S~
So, was this before or after he beat up an Hasidic Jew after watching A History of Violence?

No it was after he beat up two undercover cops though. well in truth the think with the cops happen years ago, but it sound better if you leave the years ago part out. He also has the nickname of the strangler. Before and after he was an adman he was a bounce/bodyguard. He a nice guy, but he got the worse luck. He the only guy I know who got put in thunder dome for a DUI. For those who do not live in LA it what they call the holding cells were they put all the murderers, rapists, and hard core gang bangers.
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post #124 of 126
8/17/07 at 7:38pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by teledork
Where's DaveB's eenin stories, dammit? It's fuckin Friday and I need some eenin stories to carry me through the weekend.
Two for one

I had a girl friend once who was hooked on pain pills. She slipped me a mickey. Here the kicker I am allergic to Opiates. She said she didn't know. I remember telling her, and she was mad at me that night. After I got over the itching, the really intense pain, the swelling, and the projectile vomiting I never spook to her again.

Last night I had an old girl friend call me for a ride. She is pregnant, and her boyfriend or what ever kicked her out. So I said okay . I should have asked were too first! It turned out it was to Compton. After we pass the corner of assault & batter a couple of time she say turn right. So I do, and then she says sorry I meant left. So I asked her so why are you trying to get me killed? She said what do you mean. I told her I am the only white guy for miles in the middle of the night in Compton, and she has me turning down the wrong streets. If I was going to risk my life driving some around I would go work for Haliburton. At less they 150k with great tax incentives a year for something that crazy.
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post #125 of 126
8/18/07 at 12:31am
If I were you, I'd never spook to her again either. People have got to learn that spooking is a privilege that can be revoked.
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post #126 of 126
8/18/07 at 11:18am
Dear Lord, she got you into range of BLACK PEOPLE? Seriously, get a restraining order on that bitch.
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