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Cute Things Your Kids Say - Page 3

post #101 of 128
4/9/08 at 12:03pm
My son is "that kid that bites" in daycare. Yesterday I got called out of work to talk to my son about his biting. He's 2 years old.

I was in the daycare office with my son and the little boy he bit.. and I told him he needed to apologize immediately.

When I heard my son say "I'm sorry, Evan" my heart broke.

Its the first time I've heard him make a sentence and specifically say someone's name in that sentence. It was very endearing.

I then took him home and gave his booty a spanking and took away his toys.

I hate to derail this thread, but honestly how do you get your child to stop biting other children??
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post #102 of 128
4/9/08 at 12:14pm
Punch his teeth out?

I'd actually show him the most disgusting pictures of people with gingivitis you can find and tell him thats what happens to people who bite other people.
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post #103 of 128
4/9/08 at 12:17pm
According to my father, bite him back, and harder. Apparently that stopped me when I was two. Reflecting on that, I think my father might be part wolf. For me, my little one likes to bite me and his mother with a mischevious little look on his face, and I'm trying very hard to not laugh when he does it, so as not to encourage him. I hear they grow out of it eventually. Or go feral, who knows.
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post #104 of 128
4/9/08 at 12:26pm
That's what my wife did. Obviously I can't recommend it because, I mean, it's biting a kid... but it worked.
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post #105 of 128
4/9/08 at 12:46pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bailey View Post
That's what my wife did. Obviously I can't recommend it because, I mean, it's biting a kid... but it worked.
And it's at least inappropriate discipline and at most CHILD ABUSE so you'd be putting yourself at risk.

We just spatted ours on the hand every time he bit us or his brother, worked after two or three days, but each kid is different.
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post #106 of 128
4/10/08 at 1:29am
A family friend's child was misbehaving at hockey practice (or since they're Canadian, the hockey practice eh) and when his mother took him out to the car to take him home he busted this out:

"I'm sorry mama, I've disgraced both myself and my family!'

He was like 8 or 9. I laughed so hard.

This one's also a doozy. It's not so much a said as did. The hockey guy's little sister was ticked off that her Lite Brite didn't work and Dad went to get bulbs at the variety store without her. So she walked across town. Now, mind you it's a town of 500 people, but she had to cross two sets of railroad tracks to do this, not to mention she didn't have shoes. She walks into the variety store and promptly asks "Excuse me, can I see my daddy?". The store owner says he's not here and turns to call her folks. By this point she's walked out the door. Her parents meet her halfway between the store and home, she asks them as they're getting out of the car "Hi Mommy, hi Daddy. I was just on my way home, want to just meet me there?"
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post #107 of 128
4/10/08 at 2:09am
My (at the time) 5-year-old daughter and I were leaving a store and I was holding her hand as we crossed the parking lt. She was skipping, I was walking. She says to me "Hey Daddy, wanna skip with me?" I kindly declined and she said "What's a matter - you embaaarrrrassed?" In that sort of taunting/mocking tone. I chuckled and said "No, I just don't wanna skip right now." She thinks for a second and says "You know, Daddy, you should show everyone that you're the kind of man who's not afraid to skip."

I was struck speechless. I had absolutely no idea what to say to that - how does a five year old think to say something so smart...and so fucking true? I realized that she had bested me, so dammit, I sucked it up and we skipped all the way to the car.
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post #108 of 128
4/10/08 at 8:24pm
Skipped while showing everyone the rock horns, right? 'Cause now that sounds like a KISS album cover.
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post #109 of 128
4/10/08 at 9:34pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jeremy Jochman View Post
Skipped while showing everyone the rock horns, right? 'Cause now that sounds like a KISS album cover.
EDIT: Whoops. Double trouble.
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post #110 of 128
4/10/08 at 9:36pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jeremy Jochman View Post
Skipped while showing everyone the rock horns, right? 'Cause now that sounds like a KISS album cover.
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post #111 of 128
4/10/08 at 10:54pm
Thank yoooou!
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post #112 of 128
4/10/08 at 11:47pm
Always!

That album cover was actually painted on the side of someone's house in town here not all that long ago.

I don't know why they took it off.

Anyways, back to other people's children.
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post #113 of 128
4/28/08 at 11:44am
My son is fascinated by cars.. and we got him a couple of Hot Wheels Monster Trucks.

He's 2 and 4 months and can't really say TR-ucks very well.

So he pretty much goes around the house saying "MONSTAFUCK!" over and over and over.

I'll say..."TRUCK.. Tra Tra Tra Truck."
He'll say... "monstafuck?"

"TRUCK!!"
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post #114 of 128
4/28/08 at 1:56pm
My four year old came to me matter of factly yesterday and said "you know dad, I think I'm gonna need driving lessons." He tells me that then turns around and proceeds to go about his normal routine of playing with our Boxer(dog variety) in the back yard and jumping on his trampoline. Oh to be young again.
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post #115 of 128
4/28/08 at 2:23pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by neaux View Post
My son is fascinated by cars.. and we got him a couple of Hot Wheels Monster Trucks.

He's 2 and 4 months and can't really say TR-ucks very well.

So he pretty much goes around the house saying "MONSTAFUCK!" over and over and over.

I'll say..."TRUCK.. Tra Tra Tra Truck."
He'll say... "monstafuck?"

"TRUCK!!"
I used to do the same thing, actually. Although, I was apparently fond of doing it in public, much to my parents' chagrin.
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post #116 of 128
4/28/08 at 4:11pm
When my niece was about three, we were over at my Mom's house, sitting out in the sun on the back deck. I was stretched out on a chaise deck chair, almost dozing, when my niece, bearing a medium sized beach towel, decides to head over and climb on me.

She climbs up on my lap, and proceeds to cover both of our heads with the beach towel, like "The Cone of Silence" on "Get Smart." She presses her forehead to mine, and looks very seriously into my eyes while our heads are under the beach towel together.

After about half a minute, all of a sudden, she throws her hands up in the air and exclaims, "I don't know where everybody is! They can't see us if we're under here!", and pulls the towel off of us so the rest of the family can "find" us.
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post #117 of 128
5/1/08 at 7:47pm
My two-year old nephew is learning a rather colorful vocabulary from his grandpa.

Not only did he perfectly mimic 'schwetty balls' when Dad was asking what kind of balls he was playing with a few months back, he can also repeat Dad's new nickname for me: "Uncle Sasquatch". Or as he says it, "Uncle Ozscotch."

Yeah....
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post #118 of 128
5/1/08 at 9:32pm
As we're about to go upstairs so he can go to bed, one of those St. Jude's Children Hospital commercials comes on, with the cancer patient kids, etc. My son (who is 6 1/2) looks at me and says, "I HATE that commercial. I really do."

Me: "Why, because it makes you sad?"

My Son: "The first time I saw it, it made me sad. But now, every time it comes on again, it's like, 'I know! Ok!?! I get it! I understand! You don't have to keep showing me!"
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post #119 of 128
5/1/08 at 9:33pm
He must also hate Truth ads and alls I can say is. You and me both man. You and me both.
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post #120 of 128
5/2/08 at 9:08am
My son's favorite show is Yo Gabba Gabba.. and he's learning the hip hop talk.

The other day we were in the car listening to some bad 90's dance music and he's in his car seat literally boppin his head, feelin' the music.

Out of nowhere he yells out. "Break it down!" "Oh yeah"

That was the most awesome thing I've ever heard him say.
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post #121 of 128
5/2/08 at 9:15am
My son loves to sing along to the hook of Pantera's "Walk". Sometimes he'll tell me to turn it to "rock and roll music". He also heard PE's "Bring the Noise" for the first time a few weeks ago and made me play it like 5 times in a row.
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post #122 of 128
5/11/08 at 1:46am
Quote:
Originally Posted by neaux View Post
My son's favorite show is Yo Gabba Gabba.. and he's learning the hip hop talk.
Ha, my nephew also loves Yo Gabba Gabba. And Europe. The band. "Final Countdown", to be exact. Where that came from, no one knows. (Then again, my brother in law tried to give the kid a mohawk and failed only because he wouldn't stay still long enough.)
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post #123 of 128
5/11/08 at 3:48pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jim Barg View Post
Ha, my nephew also loves Yo Gabba Gabba. And Europe. The band. "Final Countdown", to be exact. Where that came from, no one knows. (Then again, my brother in law tried to give the kid a mohawk and failed only because he wouldn't stay still long enough.)
Probably form the "Sonic and Mario at the Olympics" game commercial.

Free Tibet, Motherfuckers!
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post #124 of 128
5/11/08 at 4:13pm
So my 4 year old son was enduring a bout of diarrhea the other day, and in between crying and moaning, he paused for a moment, and said calmly, "I think we're going to need to clean the toilet."

A couple of months ago, he had a sore throat, and we were lettng him have Luden's cough drops to help soothe it. He was trying to go to sleep, and said, wearily, "Oh man, I think I need another lude."
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post #125 of 128
5/11/08 at 4:18pm
This would've been a serious sign of addiction if this were 1977.
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post #126 of 128
5/11/08 at 4:23pm
Exactly.
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post #127 of 128
5/12/08 at 7:24am
Don't have any kids myself, but I remember one story my mom would tell me when I had long forgotten about this. She said that when I was 2 or 3 years old being toilet trained I would ask her if I could take a dump by saying, "Mommy, my poo poo hurts."

My parents high tailed it out of there and called DHS.
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post #128 of 128
5/16/08 at 9:37am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jesse The Mind View Post
Yikes, you look just like Devin.
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