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Lamest D&D Monsters... ever!

post #1 of 26
9/19/07 at 12:18pm
Thread Starter 
This trip down memory lane might spawn some heated debate (Giant Vampire Frogs rock... you don't even know!), get people to draw and post their own creations, or cause the thread to grow teeth and/or acid spit glands in anticipation of unsuspecting nerd-posters that may wander in here.

DUNGEONS & DRAGONS: CELEBRATING 30 YEARS OF VERY STUPID MONSTERS.

How did the lame Rust Monster not make the list? Shenanigans!

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post #2 of 26
9/19/07 at 12:20pm
My nerdar sensed this thread. And now I'm smiling from ear to ear, reading about the Flumph.
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post #3 of 26
9/19/07 at 12:21pm
What? No boobrie?
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post #4 of 26
9/19/07 at 12:23pm
Gotta love the Duckbunny. That's the stuff nightmares are made of.
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post #5 of 26
9/19/07 at 12:28pm
This article makes me want to play again. I haven't played D&D for 10 years.
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post #6 of 26
9/19/07 at 12:36pm
Rust monsters can be nasty with some of the new Eberron races.
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post #7 of 26
9/19/07 at 12:39pm
I use Kinder Surprise figurines for battle scenes.
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post #8 of 26
9/19/07 at 12:39pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Richard Dickson
What? No boobrie?
Funnily enough, D&D didn't invent the Boobrie. Alcoholism did. It's a mythical water bird of Scottish Highlands folklore.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of...dary_creatures

Quote:
Originally Posted by Luca S.
I use Kinder Surprise figurines for battle scenes.
Star Wars Happy Hippos?
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post #9 of 26
9/19/07 at 12:48pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by DARKMITE8
Funnily enough, D&D didn't invent the Boobrie. Alcoholism did. It's a mythical water bird of Scottish Highlands folklore.
It's still a dumb monster. We always joked that the Forgotten Realms equivalent of Hooters would be called Boobries.

Quote:
Star Wars Hippos?
That was Spelljammer, where you flew in giant space frigates fighting mind flayers. Space hippos made perfect sense.
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post #10 of 26
9/19/07 at 12:58pm
Kinder had a Pirates of the Caribbean set out for a while, so luckily I now have some rascally types and zombies and fish men, but yeah, my first few years were played with hippos and beavers and such.
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post #11 of 26
9/19/07 at 1:19pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Luca S.
...my first few years were played with hippos and beavers and such.
Reminds me of Band Camp.
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post #12 of 26
9/19/07 at 2:12pm
I think this is the first time I've ever posted in this forum, but that site is absolutely hilarious. I think the only AD&D manual I actually owned was the Fiend Folio; nice to see it get some play there.
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post #13 of 26
9/19/07 at 2:20pm
I actually owned the Deities and Demigods book with the Cthulhu Mythos. I get mad nerd points for that.
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post #14 of 26
9/19/07 at 2:22pm
Hey, if that FF is in good shape you could sell it for at least $5 on eBay.
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post #15 of 26
9/19/07 at 2:24pm
The Giant Space Hamster is now my desktop background.

MONKEY BEES MONKEY BEES MONKEY BEES MONKEY BEES!!

edit - jay f, I will tolerate a lot of nerdery. I will delight in a CD collection that easily clears 2,000 discs, I will take a trip to Gurnee to see Hellboy, I will earn a grip credit on an zombie film for stuffing a Six-Demon Bag with balloons to create more realistic hammerspace, I will even welcome the Droidel into my home (hell, I'll construct the Droidel and give it as a Hanukkah gift), but there is no way that there is a Fiend Folio in this apartment.
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post #16 of 26
9/19/07 at 2:25pm
Sadly, gone now. Most of my nerd detritus got chunked when I moved out from my parents' house.
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post #17 of 26
9/19/07 at 2:28pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alan "Nordling" Cerny
I actually owned the Deities and Demigods book with the Cthulhu Mythos. I get mad nerd points for that.
I have a couple of those. I was convinced that I would be able to sell them for lots of money so I bought every one I found at garage sales and what not. Turns out nobody threw all that shit away. It's just buried in your mom's attic.
I loved the Elric, Grey Mouser and Cthulhu stuff. Great for reading the novels and being able to look up their stats. How could Cthulhu only have a 25 INT?!? That's stupid.
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post #18 of 26
9/19/07 at 3:12pm
holy shit a DROIDEL
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post #19 of 26
9/19/07 at 3:30pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissZooey
edit - jay f, I will tolerate a lot of nerdery. I will delight in a CD collection that easily clears 2,000 discs,
I think it's more like 3,000 at this point.

I'm guessing the Fiend Folio was sold years ago at one of my mom's garage sales.
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post #20 of 26
9/19/07 at 3:39pm
Where Giant Vampire Frogs really come from:

http://pbfcomics.com/?cid=0PBF65005B...os_Bite.jpg#65
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post #21 of 26
9/19/07 at 4:18pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Luca S.
holy shit a DROIDEL
Yeah, isn't it awesome?

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post #22 of 26
9/19/07 at 4:25pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by DaveB
I think this is the first time I've ever posted in this forum, but that site is absolutely hilarious.
OT, but this page is the epitomy of hilarious.
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post #23 of 26
9/19/07 at 4:38pm
Off-topic is okay when it's that magnificent.
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post #24 of 26
9/19/07 at 5:06pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by sunwukong
OT, but this page is the epitomy of hilarious.
This gives new meaning to "cock punch".
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post #25 of 26
9/19/07 at 7:46pm
Between the two pages linked from this thread, I really don't think Head Injury Theater understands ironic humor. If you make fun of Flail Snails, you lose by default.

And I had that Doom Patrol comic book.
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post #26 of 26
8/8/09 at 4:20pm
Thread Starter 
Dungeons & Dragons: Celebrating 30+ Years of Stupid Monsters: PART TWO.

15 Retarded Dungeons and Dragons Monsters

WTF, D&D: 1st Edition Monster Manual (part 1)
WTF, D&D: 1st Edition Monster Manual (part 2)

WTF, D&D: Monster Manual II (part one)
WTF, D&D: Monster Manual II (part two)
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