RedNeck Camaro!!

It's missing a #3 on the door.

Is that the governor's official car?

Isn't "redneck camaro" an oxymoron?

And what's missing is the guy with the camaro hair (aka mullet) to drive this thing.

No, Guidos in Jersey & Staten Island like 'em, too.

Open your mind to the possiblities.... people outside the south can be rednecks, too.

That's right, every state has it's own version of rednecks or whitetrash. Every state, even Rhode Island.

Gotta outrun them rev'nooers somehow.

Oh, no doubt. But Guidos are a whole 'nother animal that have a penchant for Camaros. I'm not sure what Jersey Rednecks drive, since they're mostly concentrated in the South of our fair state, and I don't get down there much. I'm guessing big pick up trucks.

I didn't realize Rhode Island was big enough to fit enough people to have that kind of diversity. I always thought when the fifth person entered Rhode Island, the first person had to leave to make room for him.

A perfectly crappy car, made crappier.

Pretty nice, but what's sticking out of the hood there?

That's where you stretch the rubber band.

Actually it is possible and the Farrelly brothers movies have showed it to us.

Nope, not really. They loveses them some Camaros too, youse. When I was in high school and college - every guy who got his first hot car? It was always a Camaro or a 280 Z. God help me, my own brother had a 280 Z.

And somewhere I hear the sounds of Billy Squire playing while Lowenbrau is chugged.

I don't think you know what oxymoron means.

Yeah, I meant repetious or redundant. Sadly, the edit function turned off before my brain turned on.

A guy down the road from me has a similar Camaro, except with a set of deer antlers mounted above the windshield and a cammo pattern on the doors.

I got your back.

With every post, you make louisiana sound more and more inteesting. . . .

*Clears Throat*

"BITCHIN CAMARO, BITCHIN CAMARO
I ran over my neighbors
BITCHIN CAMARAO, BITCHIN CAMARO
Now it's in all the papers.
My folks bought me a BITCHIN CAMARO with no insurance to match;
So if you happen to run me down, please don't leave a scratch.
I ran over some old lady one night at the county fair;
And I didn't get arrested, because my dad's the mayor.
BITCHIN CAMARO, BITCHIN CAMARO
Doughnuts on your lawn
BITCHIN CAMARO, BITCHIN CAMARO
Tony Orlando and Dawn
When I drive past the kids, they all spit and cuss,
Because I've got a BITCHIN CAMARO and they have to ride the bus.
So you'd better get out of my way, when I run through your yard;
Because I've got a BITCHIN CAMARO;
And an Exxon credit card.
BITCHIN CAMARO, BITCHIN CAMARO
Hey, man where ya headed?
BITCHIN CAMARO, BITCHIN CAMARO
I drive on unleaded."

Well, it's certainley...unique.

I swear, it's like having a southern cousin...

I'm glad someone does, since I clearly don't have it covered.

You don't wear backless stuff to your office, do you doc? You can get scratched that way.

Of course I don't wear backless outfits to work, and for the record, horses don't really scratch.

Photos. Please!

Re: what we hillbillies/Pineys drive in southern/central Jersey, mostly 4X4s, and mostly domestic (USA! USA!). The Camaro/Mustang/"Joey, youse gots a HOT car!" set (Guidos and Guidettes) usually can be found near the Shore, or further north.

Alas, there doesn't seem to be as many Guidos/Guidettes as there were when I was but a young lad. It's noticeable in many of our fairer gyms and fitness centers. No shaved male bodies with gold chains glistening in the showers, fewer female bodies sculpted through the magic of silicone and saline. Why, even the hairstyles aren't as highly teased as Peg Bundy's. Truly, the NJ Guido/Guidette is becoming extinct.

But it doesn't have to be that way! Nay, YOU, my fellow chewers can sponsor your very own Guido and/or Guidette from such exotic Garden State villages such as Lodi! Neptune! Paramus! Hackensack! Leonia! Yes for only pennies a day you can help a deserving Guido, like young Ant'ny here, acheive his dream of sleeping in until 4:00 in the afternoon, drive a smokin' hot 'Stang with ground effects and neon license plate holders, and hook up with three L Michellle after her shift at Cheetah's on a "Thoisday" night!

Just send $300 to the following address...

Ah Ha! I was right!

Heh. To be honest, as a Piney, I drive a Saturn SC2 (USA! USA! With parts from Toronto! US..uh... Ohhhh, Can-a-da!). Everyone else around here seems to be driving SUVs and 4X4's. Why? 'Cause of the rugged Jersey terrain, I guess.

Yes, the Parkway and Turnpike are notoriously wild & rugged. As another Chewer from Jersey, it's a little unsettling to me that I too drive a Saturn, in my case an SL1 4 door. I think the rednecks and the guidos are going to gang up on us.

Ahhh, we can take 'em. Just show 'em a card trick - they'll be so stunned they'll forget why they're mad at us.

That or you ask "Jadooer? (Did you do her?)". Then they'll start bragging, and everybody's buddies again.

Yeah, but Tim and Iggy, you guys - oh, sorry - youse guyses are much further north than where I grew up. I'm talking about way down by Atlantic City. Plenty of Guidos, Guidettes, shaved muscled bodies, gold chains and nary a 4x4 to be found. Still driving their hot little penis-mobiles around my old stomping grounds.

Lisa, please tell me you didn't have high hair, spandex pants, chewed a LOT of gum, and had a friend named Michelle when you were in AC. I beg you. Or had a boyfriend named Ant'ny, Mikey, Joey, Tony, Paulie, Jimmy, Joey-Boy, or Tommy.

Edited to add:

Oh, sweetheart... of course I did. I'm from NJ. It was the 80s. Huge hair? It didn't get any more huge than mine. Thick Brooke Shields eyebrows? Yes. Doorknocker earrings? Yes again. Boyfriend named Jimmy? For a brief while, yes. I mean, as you've seen from the Chewervision thread, I've learned how to tone it waaay down - 18 years in NYC will teach you what looks good and what doesn't. But when I had no such people around to teach me during my whole 25 years in Jersey? Of course I looked that bad! I really must scan and post the picture of me from a wedding I was in back in 1988. Giant hair and a bridesmaid gown - it just doesn't get any Jersey-er.

Actually, there's this hilarious family photo of my niece and I taken when she was just a couple of days old in 1990. And I'm there in the picture, cuddling her tiny-baby self, sporting my giant hair and big earrings. She's 17 now, and we call that the "Angela Delveccio" picture; Angela Delveccio being my NJ mall hair alter-ego. And she'll always make me do the imitation - "Do Angela Delveccio for me." Then I have to launch into the "Joisey" accent about how I look in the picture. Her favorite part, and mine, is when I wrap it up with, "And den, I hid da baby in my hair, left da house, and my sister-in-laaaw wuz none da wis-uh."

"Youse" guys are way too hard on some aspects of jersey in the 80's. Maybe it's just because I came of age in the 80's, but I've gone on record here and in other places as saying, I kinda LIKE the big hair. I miss it. Thank God for Bayonne & Bloomfield, where the old ways. . . .Survive.

"You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to LisaNewYork again." Oh, I'm gonna rep you for this someday, girlie-girl. I'ma gonna rep you HARD (cue wa-wa pedal).

Ig, I too came of age in the '80s - in my high school and college years I was neck deep in guidii. Every guy tried to be Barbarino, but wound up a Horshack. Every girl was an acolyte of Pat Benatar, Stevie Nicks, Joan Jett, or Madonna. Gold chains, tight pants, gum chewing, fuck me heels, high hair, wifebeaters - the uniform of the day. The parking lot was FILLED with Camaros, 'Stangs, Firebirds (hell of a lot of Pontiacs back then), and the occasional Porsche or two ("connected" kids, "wink, wink")

I, however, spent 3 years in an Air Force JROTC cadet uniform. I was drawing up a storm. I was passing my classes with relative ease.

Long time until I got any noonie-cookie ("NO WAY!!! NOT YOU, TIM!!!!" Alas, 'twas true - God bless college), but I did get to launch rockets and fire off an M-16 and an M-1 at Fort Dix! Yeah, that was MUCH better than getting busy with a Madonna wannabe in the back of my Toyota!

I'll be in the corner, crying bitterly, over what might've been... y'know if anyone wants me... "sniff".

Neck deep in guidii - haaah! I repped yuhz fuh dat.

Best part about that picture of my niece and me - my sister-in-law just won't take the picture down from the gallery of family photos in her house. She loves it - she says, "I adore that picture - you look so happy to be holding her in it." And I was, and my niece was so itty bitty - but because I was holding her up and cuddling her next to my face, it really does look like my next step is to stuff her into my mall perm and high-tail it outta there.

Thanks for the rep! And I gotta see the picture!

Rep for everybody who actually used the term "Ya fuckin' mook" in a non-ironic way! I'll take your word for it, no need to prove it.

I don't know if I can find that picture - it's at my sister-in-law's house, but I think I have a copy of it too. The more likely one that I can find easily is the bridesmaid picture, which is equally hilarious. I'll see what I can do.

I had a similar high school experience.

Only. . . without the cool guns. And explosions. And stuff. Now ya got me bitter, 'cuz I ain't had nothin' to compensate. Got room in the corner?

And yes, Ryan, I do indeed use the expression "Ya fuckin' mook" on occasion.

Yeah, Ig. C'mon over, I got a bag of Cheetos with your name on it. It'll help you to... forget.

I should amend my earlier post - they were model rockets. Me and Estes are likethis! One of the perks of AFJROTC was the two-week "summer camp" at Dix. Most of the time it was Drill and Ceremonies, as well as some Basic. Sounds cool, was kind of cool, but I would have traded it ALL for some backseat mambo action. Fuck, where was Kelly LeBrock or Ally Sheedy when I needed her? I would've been a prime candidate for a John Hughes teen flick! (shoves Cheetos into his mouth, bitterly)

Ryan, my wife uses "fucking mook" alot. Does that count?

As soon as I am able to rep you again I'll send some love your way!

You're all my fuckin' mooks.

I THINK that's a compliment. . . .

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm....Kelly LeBrock.


nummers

And while I've never used the "ya fuckin mook" term, I HAVE, on occasion used the phrase "ya mick bastard" among friends. But I live in Missouri and they sorta don't know what that means. So it's cool.

Speaking as a mick bastard... it's definitely cool.

And whatever did happen to Kelly LeBrock?

She did a stint on Celebrity Fit Club a few seasons ago, lost a ton of weight, and generally wound up looking fabulous by the end of the season.

Really? Hmmmmm..... I'm guessing she didn't look like this, right?



BTW: "mick bastard" sounds like a '70s cop TV show. "Mick Bastard, PI!"