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What are your chances of surviving a zombie apocalypse? - Page 2

post #51 of 91
10/4/07 at 8:13pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jason P. Thompson
Choosing between a shopping mall and Wal-Mart is a trick question. They both have everything you need!
Yeah, but we CHUD readers all hate Wal-Mart.
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post #52 of 91
10/4/07 at 8:19pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Beageal
Yeah, but we CHUD readers all hate Wal-Mart.
Plus the Mall has the food court and Auntie Anne pretzels......Mall wins hands down.
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post #53 of 91
10/4/07 at 8:27pm
I could totally live in the 5 dollar DVD bin. Zombies wouldn't stand a chance against copies of shit like Top Dog and Godzilla flying through the air at high speeds.
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post #54 of 91
10/4/07 at 8:47pm
35%

I'm physically disabled, so I can't run fast enough. Never fired and don't own a gun. Liable to wet myself at any moment.

I do, however, own a fair bit of Queen, so that helps.
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post #55 of 91
10/4/07 at 8:54pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by DJ HiPPiE
Plus the Mall has the food court and Auntie Anne pretzels......Mall wins hands down.
You know, maybe, if you just introduce a zombie to Orange Julius and Cinnabon, they might then think you're cool and take a liking to you, plus have other food alternatives.
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post #56 of 91
10/4/07 at 9:25pm
43% due to the fact us Brits aren't allowed Guns.
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post #57 of 91
10/4/07 at 9:27pm
Dude, just roll on down to the Winchester.
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post #58 of 91
10/4/07 at 10:05pm
70%. I don't have a lot of food and would try to find my family before heading to the mall. Oddly enough, I wouldn't have a problem wasting a zombified relative.
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post #59 of 91
10/4/07 at 11:27pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by gravedigger
Oddly enough, I wouldn't have a problem wasting a zombified relative.
With a name like Gravedigger I would hope not.
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post #60 of 91
10/5/07 at 12:29am
63%

I need to own a gun again.

I don't have much canned food.

Doesn't Walmart still have guns? I probably got negative points for wanting to go there for supplies, because lots of people would be there doing the same thing (with infected amongst them).

What this test doesn't seem to take into account is that staying hidden in one place with canned food didn't work in any movie. The only thing that seemed to work was constantly being on the move, until reaching a deserted area.
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post #61 of 91
10/5/07 at 10:42am
47%.

I always knew my family would be the death of me. Which is a shame because I would make a kickass leader in the post zombie apocalypse world.
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post #62 of 91
10/5/07 at 11:53am
52%.

I think this quiz should incorporate a DAWN '04 sprinting zombie/NIGHT '68 aggressive-yet-slow zombie/DAWN '78 lumbering zombie/NIGHT '90 slow-as-fuck zombie scenario variable in the set-up.

If it's NIGHT '90, I should have about a 89% chance of survival. If it's DAWN '04, more like 12%. Another reason I hate Zack Snyder.
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post #63 of 91
10/5/07 at 12:09pm
58% chance of surviving. I'm not the fastest runner, but I know how to take a zombie down.
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post #64 of 91
10/5/07 at 12:42pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by varybarry
58% chance of surviving. I'm not the fastest runner, but I know how to take a zombie down.
46% I loved this quest. homemade explosivs? mmmmm, yeah I could try
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post #65 of 91
10/5/07 at 12:50pm
Wow, a lot of you guys are really fucked.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Litmus Configuration
I think this quiz should incorporate a DAWN '04 sprinting zombie/NIGHT '68 aggressive-yet-slow zombie/DAWN '78 lumbering zombie/NIGHT '90 slow-as-fuck zombie scenario variable in the set-up.

If it's NIGHT '90, I should have about a 89% chance of survival. If it's DAWN '04, more like 12%. Another reason I hate Zack Snyder.
Good point. We'd all be (un?)dead meat in a DAWN '04 scenario. Unless we were like Andy and owned a gunshop. But smarter than him in the fact we'd have plenty of canned beets and such. Can't go wrong with canned beets.
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post #66 of 91
10/5/07 at 2:13pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nexus-7
Wow, a lot of you guys are really fucked.
Good point. We'd all be (un?)dead meat in a DAWN '04 scenario. Unless we were like Andy and owned a gunshop. But smarter than him in the fact we'd have plenty of canned beets and such. Can't go wrong with canned beets.
And cute little baby zombies, a boat, and copies of Animal House to watch while we wait to get eaten.
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post #67 of 91
10/5/07 at 3:05pm
Zombie MissZooey would bite all our fat little knees.
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post #68 of 91
10/5/07 at 3:46pm
Just remember, Malls don't have the automatic sliding "magic" doors that supermarkets (and some Walmarts) have...

Walmart for supplies, Malls for fortification.

Course, The Walking Dead graphic novel showed the potential of walled/gated communities and prisons as places to eke out a survival in the more long-term.
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post #69 of 91
10/5/07 at 5:07pm
Fine then - you're driving the bus full of Chewers from Walmart over to the mall.
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post #70 of 91
10/5/07 at 9:34pm
51%

Shit, I could've sworn I was doing better.
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post #71 of 91
10/8/07 at 2:47pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by LisaNewYork
Fine then - you're driving the bus full of Chewers from Walmart over to the mall.
Can we stop by the Dairy Queen before we hit the mall.
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post #72 of 91
10/8/07 at 3:08pm
The Dairy Queen is a fucking death trap!

You're off the bus.
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post #73 of 91
10/8/07 at 3:26pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nexus-7
The Dairy Queen is a fucking death trap!

You're off the bus.
Not if we stock up on Blzzards....Fire em out of a T-shirt cannon and you'll take a zombie's head off with no problem.....And make sure that spoon thing is stuck in there good for added damage.

Starbucks.......Now THAT'S a deathtrap....If the zombie apocalypse ever comes down the government better nuke every starbucks off the planet.
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post #74 of 91
10/8/07 at 3:38pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by DJ HiPPiE
Not if we stock up on Blzzards....Fire em out of a T-shirt cannon and you'll take a zombie's head off with no problem.....And make sure that spoon thing is stuck in there good for added damage.
Okay okay, we'll drop you off and circle the block.

Quote:
Originally Posted by DJ HiPPiE
Starbucks.......Now THAT'S a deathtrap....If the zombie apocalypse ever comes down the government better nuke every starbucks off the planet.
There's nothing worse than a caffeinated zombie.

On the other hand, they might not be very hungry.
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post #75 of 91
10/8/07 at 3:59pm
The lack of canned food and abundance of chubbiness slowing me down gave me a 45%.
DJ, bring me back a blizzard?
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post #76 of 91
10/8/07 at 4:21pm
Why not just swipe an ice cream truck? You got your ice cream, you got mobility, and you got some loudspeakers to blast some Motorhead through, all in one package. Granted, we'd need somebody to crank up the speed of one of those things, but still...
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post #77 of 91
10/8/07 at 4:25pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Timothy225
Why not just swipe an ice cream truck? You got your ice cream, you got mobility, and you got some loudspeakers to blast some Motorhead through, all in one package. Granted, we'd need somebody to crank up the speed of one of those things, but still...

Now if Romero had made Dead Reckoning a Ice Cream truck with rocket launchers and armored plating.....Land of the Dead would have been bigger than Titanic.
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post #78 of 91
10/8/07 at 4:51pm
30%. Damn you, Nebraska!
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post #79 of 91
10/8/07 at 5:02pm
You Have a 61% Chance of Survival

i don´t own a gun and order food every day
but, fuck my loved ones!
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post #80 of 91
10/8/07 at 5:05pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by DJ HiPPiE
Now if Romero had made Dead Reckoning a Ice Cream truck with rocket launchers and armored plating.....Land of the Dead would have been bigger than Titanic.
Hell, I'd have been there opening night, instead of waiting for the DVD. We should put some chainsaws on the sides, too (Dawn of the Dead), but be WAY more careful mounting and using the damn things so as to avoid slicing any of our crew in half. Oh, and any self-important, snooty, pretentious motherfuckers best check that shit at the door or you're zombie chum (y'ever notice you always wind up with one of those assholes like in the Dawn of the Dead remake? The fucker with the boat? Ving Rhames should've laid a smackdown on that putz. Repeatedly and often).
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post #81 of 91
10/9/07 at 5:47pm
68%. I need to store up some more food in the basement, and see if I can get my daughters' boyfriends to stop by and pick them up in case of zombie catastrophe. Them and the fucking dog. I hate the fucking dog.
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post #82 of 91
10/9/07 at 5:58pm
If you hate the dog, why would you want to save it? And to be honest, short of having your own bomb shelter. Who the hell keeps a food supply for months?
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post #83 of 91
10/9/07 at 10:09pm
a pair of freezers in the garage large enough to stash the bodies of the Brady Bunch and a workroom off the garage that is holding entirely too many canned foods due to "special sales at Sam's Club".

As far as the dog? It loves me, and I'm not the sort of heartless cad that can kick a mini-pin/chihuahua mix just for the enjoyment of it. Teen daughters? yeah....dog? Nope.
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post #84 of 91
10/10/07 at 11:06am
Thread Starter 
If we can get this and outfit it, we will all survive 100%.

http://cgi.ebay.com/Titan-Missile-Ba...32455924QQrdZ1
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post #85 of 91
10/10/07 at 11:57am
Quote:
Originally Posted by billylove
If we can get this and outfit it, we will all survive 100%.

http://cgi.ebay.com/Titan-Missile-Ba...32455924QQrdZ1
Awesome. All we need now is a deck of cards!
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post #86 of 91
10/10/07 at 12:27pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by billylove
If we can get this and outfit it, we will all survive 100%.

http://cgi.ebay.com/Titan-Missile-Ba...32455924QQrdZ1
If we all chip in, I'm sure we can manage that.

Of course, I'm going to get eaten anyway, because if Teledork ever decides that he IS sick of the dog, then I'm dead. Because I can't leave a dog behind. So between me trying to run 20 feet up ahead in the red shirt that DJ Hippie has outfitted me with, dragging along my cat and Teledork's dog, the three of us are going to be zombie lunch.
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post #87 of 91
10/10/07 at 1:39pm
Well, now's the time to start trianing. Do some windsprints with your cat. When you've built up your speed and endurance, add a dog. Don't forget to flail your arms a bit and scream "GOD! NO!!! ZOMBIES!!! FOR GOD'S SAKE!!! RUN!!! RUN!!!!" at the top of your lungs while you're doing your sprints, as it'll teach you to regulate your breathing.

Just don't want any Chewer getting, well, chewed, is what I'm going for here.
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post #88 of 91
10/10/07 at 2:29pm
56%. Although I regret my choice of a fortified building vs. a mall or WalMart. Something with food supplies. That might have knocked me down a few pegs.
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post #89 of 91
10/10/07 at 9:08pm
45%. Damn kid. Always going back for him. But if he starts to turn, I amputting him down like a dog.
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post #90 of 91
10/11/07 at 5:05pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by LisaNewYork
If we all chip in, I'm sure we can manage that.

Of course, I'm going to get eaten anyway, because if Teledork ever decides that he IS sick of the dog, then I'm dead. Because I can't leave a dog behind. So between me trying to run 20 feet up ahead in the red shirt that DJ Hippie has outfitted me with, dragging along my cat and Teledork's dog, the three of us are going to be zombie lunch.


Missy sez: You can carry me, but leave the bitch cat out of it. I hate bitch cats.



She's serious. Bitch cats and fluffy bunnies fear her. Or ignore her as being beneath their concern. One or the other......
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post #91 of 91
10/11/07 at 5:24pm
Hmm, 51%. I'm armed, I have a couple of cases of MREs and several gallons of potable water in the basement, but dammit if I don't love my family.

Maybe I could raise my score if I bought an ice cream truck.
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