CHUD.com Community › Forums › THE CHEWERS › The Chewers Catch-All › How Many Other Inhabitants Are There With Me On Freak Island?
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:

How Many Other Inhabitants Are There With Me On Freak Island?

post #1 of 40
10/10/07 at 4:16pm
Thread Starter 
I'm still half-asleep when I shave in the morning, and I've been known to miss a hair or two. Miss the same spot a couple of days and you get a Beard of One. This can also happen when an ingrown unit is freed from its skin prison.

If I become aware of the stray hairpiece throughout the day, I pretty much shut down until I've removed it by hand. I don't carry tweezers, so it's fingernails and pinching-motions. I just spent five minutes getting rid of one of these, and if I hadn't it would have distracted me for the rest of the day until I got home. I'm generally not at the mercy of too many compulsive behaviors, but this one owns me. Am I owned alone?
Reply
post #2 of 40
10/10/07 at 4:21pm
Count me in.

Go figure as to why a single hair can cause so much confusion and anger.
Reply
post #3 of 40
10/10/07 at 4:23pm
Been there, my facial hair is deeply rooted. If I get a few strays, it takes nothing short of a orbital nuking to get rid of them.

And after I shave, I have 5 oclock shadow.
Reply
post #4 of 40
10/10/07 at 4:24pm
Nope. Just you, freak boy.

Note: This would have worked better as the first reply.
Reply
post #5 of 40
10/10/07 at 4:32pm
I'm on the same island but it's pretty low on my list of annoying compulsive behaviors.
Reply
post #6 of 40
10/10/07 at 4:36pm
I do this. I am obsessive. And I am like Billylove. I towel off my face after shaving, and somehow I become the wolfman. I always tend to miss a spot on my neck, and of course this is the worst spot to try and yank hairs by hand while sitting on your office trying to get a decent reflection off the window so you can see what you're doing.

What else is bad is after I get my hair cut and my barber misses a single invisible long hair on the top of my ear...then I scratch my ear or adjust my glasses and feel it. By the time I get one of those out it looks like someone took an ice pick to my ear drum.
Reply
post #7 of 40
10/10/07 at 4:40pm
Here's the girl version:

I color my hair. I'm middle-aged, so the gray is more noticeable than a few years ago. If I miss one gray hair after coloring, I drive myself nuts trying to pull it out. The problem is, my hair is really curly and thick, so I'm literally making a million parts back and forth, seeing the gray hair, but not able to grab it because it's all sort of intertwined.
Reply
post #8 of 40
10/10/07 at 4:41pm
Has anyone else noticed that scrotal hair is remarkably easy to pluck? It's the least painful hair removal you'll do all day!

Yes, the unibeard gets to me, but I'm usually too fixated on picking an unborn pimple to got worked up.
Reply
post #9 of 40
10/10/07 at 4:46pm
I must say, I'm not too worried about casual shaving. A little bit of random stubble adds to the character of the face, I say. Wear your flaws with pride!
Reply
post #10 of 40
10/10/07 at 4:46pm
I do it all the time. Be careful it doesn't escalate, though. Soon you'll be plucking unkempt nosehairs w/ your thumb and index finger.
Reply
post #11 of 40
10/10/07 at 4:47pm
Same here with the stray hair - I got a Braun foil razor back in May - closest shave I ever got, but it still misses the occasional hair here and there, always near the jawline and neck. I usually do what I can with the Braun, then break out the Norelco for whacking the stragglers.

To combat the grey in my hair is easy - I just shave my head. I've got a crop circle anyway, so fuck it. All that hair is just wind resistance.
Reply
post #12 of 40
10/10/07 at 4:49pm
I'm waiting for the Chewer who will admit liking to biting his toenails off.

It happens. I've seen this before.

And R-Lu, you're not alone in your madness.
Reply
post #13 of 40
10/10/07 at 5:02pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Martin Savage
I'm waiting for the Chewer who will admit liking to biting his toenails off.

It happens. I've seen this before.

And R-Lu, you're not alone in your madness.
I used to do this, but I lost the flexibility around age twenty. For the record, I would still proudly bite nail if I could, it's probably what it feels like for an old quarterback to throw a perfect spiral.
Reply
post #14 of 40
10/10/07 at 5:08pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by LisaNewYork
Here's the girl version:
Oh, Lisa.

Lisa Lisa Lisa.

Don't lie to us. We all know what the girl version is.

Sitting in a meeting, resting your chin on your palm. You move your hand to write something down, change position, etc. and there it is, right under your pinky.

The single, tiny chin hair that no one else can see but you know it's there and now you cannot ignore it.

Where did it come from? Why is it there? And when will this meeting be over so you can go dig it out of your face before someone else sees it (even though no one else could ever, ever see it)?
Reply
post #15 of 40
10/10/07 at 5:13pm
Milk grosses me out. I like it, but I won't share with anyone. I can't stand to see it sitting for an extended period of time. I will only drink it if the glass is sparkling clean and CLEAR. Mugs will not do. Straws are out of the question.

I also want to barf when people make "ice cream soup."
Reply
post #16 of 40
10/10/07 at 5:13pm
Lisa, we all know you use the Spishak Mach 20.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4F7TMlrDXtw
Reply
post #17 of 40
10/10/07 at 5:21pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Timothy225
To combat the grey in my hair is easy - I just shave my head. I've got a crop circle anyway, so fuck it. All that hair is just wind resistance.
So your avatar is an actual picture of you?

Yeah missing a hair is the worst, and not stubble, that's fine. But the one long hair...it's rather embarassing.
Reply
post #18 of 40
10/10/07 at 5:46pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissZooey
Oh, Lisa.

Lisa Lisa Lisa.

Don't lie to us. We all know what the girl version is.

Sitting in a meeting, resting your chin on your palm. You move your hand to write something down, change position, etc. and there it is, right under your pinky.

The single, tiny chin hair that no one else can see but you know it's there and now you cannot ignore it.

Where did it come from? Why is it there? And when will this meeting be over so you can go dig it out of your face before someone else sees it (even though no one else could ever, ever see it)?
Fuck. I wasn't going to mention THAT girl version. May as well 'fess up...

Reply
post #19 of 40
10/10/07 at 5:49pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Isao Kanemasa
Be careful it doesn't escalate, though. Soon you'll be plucking unkempt nosehairs w/ your thumb and index finger.
I do this too. I am convinced my parents found me in Big Bend National Park on a full moon in the bush and brought me hope thinking I would be a cute puppy.
Reply
post #20 of 40
10/10/07 at 6:04pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Isao Kanemasa
I do it all the time. Be careful it doesn't escalate, though. Soon you'll be plucking unkempt nosehairs w/ your thumb and index finger.
Yeah, I've been to that side of the island, too. It makes me break out in uncontrollable sneezing, and people are all like, "God bless you," and I'm saying thanks but wondering if I deserve their perfunctory sentiment since the sneezing is self-induced.
Reply
post #21 of 40
10/10/07 at 7:08pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by LisaNewYork
Here's the girl version:

I color my hair. I'm middle-aged, so the gray is more noticeable than a few years ago. If I miss one gray hair after coloring, I drive myself nuts trying to pull it out. The problem is, my hair is really curly and thick, so I'm literally making a million parts back and forth, seeing the gray hair, but not able to grab it because it's all sort of intertwined.
My wife has naturally jet black hair (no Gingers for us!) and occasionally a gray hair will show up (she's only 31!). She can tell when I notice one and if we're at home she'll go take care of it. But out in public she'll ask me to pull it out for her.

But I can't. I know I sound like a puss, but I can't bring myself to pull my own wife's hair out.

(Let the jokes commence...)
Reply
post #22 of 40
10/10/07 at 8:36pm
I'm 28, and I have more than a couple gray hairs (meaning that they're noticeable). I'm not all that bothered by them anymore - I'm just really happy that I'm not going to be bald....
Reply
post #23 of 40
10/10/07 at 8:52pm
This came up in another thread a while back, but I get these weird facial hairs that are more than twice the thickness/darkness of any other hairs, so I am compelled to pluck them out. they come out painlessly and almost resemble pine needles. I call them my Brundlefly hairs, but apparently it's a rare condition called Pili Multigemini.

I also have Heterochromia. Yeah, I'm a mutant.
Reply
post #24 of 40
10/10/07 at 9:25pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by pagoda
So your avatar is an actual picture of you?
Oh, you're too kind. Would that I was as dashing a ladykiller (acquitted!) as Fester Addams. Or Tor Johnson. But alas, 'tis not so. For I have a goatee - which provides endless amusement for my wife, as well as my cats.
Reply
post #25 of 40
10/10/07 at 9:25pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by LisaNewYork
Fuck. I wasn't going to mention THAT girl version. May as well 'fess up...
Yeah, you're for me, punk rock girl.
Reply
post #26 of 40
10/10/07 at 9:47pm
If I get a stray hair that I miss on my cheek, I'll try to pluck it out, but I try to get as much as I can when I shave, even though I miss some spots, mostly on my neck. I've been pretty good about not missing any spots lately.
Reply
post #27 of 40
10/10/07 at 11:32pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by WayDen
I'm 28, and I have more than a couple gray hairs (meaning that they're noticeable). I'm not all that bothered by them anymore - I'm just really happy that I'm not going to be bald....
Me too. I like to think that's a sign of maturity, when you stop yanking out gray hairs and figure 'the hell with it.' Or possibly resignation. Whichever's the peaceful one.
Reply
post #28 of 40
10/11/07 at 1:25am
I spend a long ass time shaving, then an even longer time checking to see if I miss spots. Later in the day, out in public, and BAM! There's a small patch of fur on my cheek. How could I have missed this? I feel fucking ridiculous and I can just tell they are all laughing, laughing at me!

Thank you for starting this thread, R-Lu, where my private pain can be made public.
Reply
post #29 of 40
10/11/07 at 7:09am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Big Jim Slade
I also have Heterochromia. Yeah, I'm a mutant.
Big Jim, you have two different colored eyes? Just like David Bowie! What colors are they?
Reply
post #30 of 40
10/11/07 at 9:27am
Quote:
Originally Posted by LisaNewYork
Big Jim, you have two different colored eyes? Just like David Bowie! What colors are they?
Right (my right) is brownish (with a blue wedge), left is blue.

Reply
post #31 of 40
10/11/07 at 9:28am
I used to obsess over this when I was younger.

Now I just don't care because when 10 am comes around I've got a 5 o clock shadow.
Reply
post #32 of 40
10/11/07 at 9:28am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr.Eko
If I get a stray hair that I miss on my cheek, I'll try to pluck it out, but I try to get as much as I can when I shave, even though I miss some spots, mostly on my neck. I've been pretty good about not missing any spots lately.
I usually find that if I go with a circular motion (usually with my old Norelco) over the trouble patches, near the neck and jawline, I wipe out about 90% of the strays.
Reply
post #33 of 40
10/11/07 at 10:34am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Big Jim Slade
Right (my right) is brownish (with a blue wedge), left is blue.
That is very cool. You could go out and mug people and they'd never catch you. "What color eyes did he have, m'aam?" "Brown. No - blue. No - brown with a blue wedge." You could be a very very rich man before they catch you.
Reply
post #34 of 40
10/11/07 at 1:52pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Big Jim Slade
This came up in another thread a while back, but I get these weird facial hairs that are more than twice the thickness/darkness of any other hairs, so I am compelled to pluck them out. they come out painlessly and almost resemble pine needles. I call them my Brundlefly hairs, but apparently it's a rare condition called Pili Multigemini.

I also have Heterochromia. Yeah, I'm a mutant.
Ok, about the Pili Multigemini thing - I'm having trouble with this part of the description found in the wikipedia entry:
The hair looks like a bunch of flower stalks in a vase.
Come again?

Also, I tried to show my appreciation for the post above this one, but I can't because:
You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to LisaNewYork again.
Reply
post #35 of 40
10/11/07 at 1:59pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by RyanC
The hair looks like a bunch of flower stalks in a vase.
broccoli


They've got face broccoli.
Reply
post #36 of 40
10/11/07 at 8:35pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by RyanC
Ok, about the Pili Multigemini thing - I'm having trouble with this part of the description found in the wikipedia entry:
The hair looks like a bunch of flower stalks in a vase.
Come again?
Here's a picture of it (and not, this is NOT of my skin):

Reply
post #37 of 40
10/11/07 at 8:38pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by LisaNewYork
That is very cool. You could go out and mug people and they'd never catch you. "What color eyes did he have, m'aam?" "Brown. No - blue. No - brown with a blue wedge." You could be a very very rich man before they catch you.
"The mugger was said to have one blue eye. Police are looking for this man..."

Reply
post #38 of 40
10/11/07 at 8:47pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Big Jim Slade
Here's a picture of it (and not, this is NOT of my skin):
Holy shit, it's like the hair on a doll head! (And again - my avatar works for this particular situation!)
Reply
post #39 of 40
10/13/07 at 3:45pm
I confess to having done this, though in recent years, I've never bothered with the clean shave, resorting instead to a permanent two day shadow — ie, a beard that's short enough not to be itchy.
Reply
post #40 of 40
10/13/07 at 5:11pm
A couple years ago my hair would get these stray frizzes, but they just looked like really fucking wild stray hairs. They'd be all curly looking and not straight at all. It would annoy me so much and I used to spend alot of time pulling them out. A time went on my hair either got thinner or went straighter because they're pretty calmed down now. Of course I'm pretty freaked about thinner so I wouldn't dare pluck them out now. The hair karma's gonna get me.
Reply
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:
  Return Home
  Back to Forum: The Chewers Catch-All
CHUD.com Community › Forums › THE CHEWERS › The Chewers Catch-All › How Many Other Inhabitants Are There With Me On Freak Island?