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Vote for Overlord Shmun!

post #1 of 20
10/23/07 at 12:06am
Thread Starter 
Even the title of the thread probably screws me in the long run, but I've made a decision: I'm running for public office. It's been under consideration for several years now, and I've been nudged further in the right direction, so I think I'm just gonna go for it. There's a problem, though: I'm moving to Jersey.

I come not for pity, contempt or money. I come for advice. I shall confess my ignorance on the particulars of the matter: I have no freaking idea how to do it. I'm going to start with something small, such as city council, but I'm not certain how to throw my hat into the ring.

Even beyond that, I'd like to place a request for general advice. What would you say to a potential public servant?
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post #2 of 20
10/23/07 at 12:18am
Why would anyone vote for you? You're a fucking vagina.
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post #3 of 20
10/23/07 at 12:19am
But vaginas are fun.
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post #4 of 20
10/23/07 at 12:27am
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Brad Millette
Why would anyone vote for you? You're a fucking vagina.
And as we all know, one's internet persona is, of course, the most accurate possible means of measuring a person's mettle. I salute you, and your thoroughly calculated evaluation of me. I am born anew in your wisdom.
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post #5 of 20
10/23/07 at 12:47am
No, I'm genuinely curious. What does your "I'm a huge fucking vagina" platform have to offer a constituent?
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post #6 of 20
10/23/07 at 12:48am
Thread Starter 
Free pap smears.
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post #7 of 20
10/23/07 at 12:50am
Hopefully some Mafioso will just kill you and spare us all any further embarrassment.
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post #8 of 20
10/23/07 at 12:55am
Thread Starter 
It should be fun to see how many posts you make without saying anything useful, or at least interesting.
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post #9 of 20
10/23/07 at 1:12am
What's there to fucking say? You're a big, flappy vagina that expects people to give a shit about his obviously ludicrous bid for public office. So much so, in fact, that you've gone ahead and posted it in the Politics forum, as if you actually affect anything, or anyone will ever know you, rather than just putting it in the Chewers forum where it belongs.

All you've posted is "Umm err umm I want to run for umm err uh umm err office umm err umm Jersey?"

Why SHOULD anyone give half a fuck about that? You obviously don't know what you're doing. Why bother responding to something this limpwristed and vague. Do you even KNOW what a stance is, or did you just watch the West Wing and get a stiffy over it? Fuck off, Shmun.
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post #10 of 20
10/23/07 at 1:17am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Brad Millette
Why would anyone vote for you? You're a fucking vagina.
Didn't you just answer your own question? Vagina in '08. That sells itself.
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post #11 of 20
10/23/07 at 1:25am
He's not the fun kind of vagina. He's the "I have no personality, and therefore I get all pissy with everyone around me" kind of vagina.
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post #12 of 20
10/23/07 at 1:42am
TWIRLING, TWIRLING, TWIRLING TOWARDS HERPESlulz
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post #13 of 20
10/23/07 at 1:51am
MY FELLOW AMERICANS FLAP FLAP FLAP FLAP FLAP FLAP QUEEF...
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post #14 of 20
10/23/07 at 2:09am
Abortions For Everyone

*booooooo*

Very Well, No Abortions For Anyone

*booooooo*

Fap Fap Fap Fap Fap Sploogity Clap

*yaaaaaaay*





i Am The King Of Space
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post #15 of 20
10/23/07 at 3:25am
Finally, somebody who's putting their money where their mouth is. You may be the only person around our age I know who's even considered something like this, and so I say kudos. Now your job is to get extremely fucking informed, or you'll be just as bad as the rest and thus a target of extreme hatred. Good luck!
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post #16 of 20
10/23/07 at 4:47am
Step One: Sell out to a major American corporation in exchange for pushing through legislation that will benefit them at the expense of the health and well-being of your constituents.

Step Two:

Actually, there are no more steps. Step One pretty much covers it.
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post #17 of 20
10/23/07 at 1:17pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by AlmightyShmun
Even the title of the thread probably screws me in the long run, but I've made a decision: I'm running for public office. It's been under consideration for several years now, and I've been nudged further in the right direction, so I think I'm just gonna go for it. There's a problem, though: I'm moving to Jersey.

I come not for pity, contempt or money. I come for advice. I shall confess my ignorance on the particulars of the matter: I have no freaking idea how to do it. I'm going to start with something small, such as city council, but I'm not certain how to throw my hat into the ring.

Even beyond that, I'd like to place a request for general advice. What would you say to a potential public servant?
You need to check city ordinances to find out the filing requirements (deadlines, fees, residency, etc.). You may need to check with the local party of your choice to see what is required to run in its primary. Then you campaign and probably lose.

Before all that, though, you need to attend city council meetings and research the local issues you would be dealing with if you get the office you want. What are the most important issues, what are you opinions on those issues, what should be done about them, and why are you the one to do it? If you can't satisfactorily answer those questions, don't bother. If you can answer those questions, seek out people (preferably ones with money) who might share your views to see if they might support you in your run. Good luck.
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post #18 of 20
10/23/07 at 1:20pm
I'll never be able to run for office because of this site. I'll get destroyed because of some of the posts I've made here.
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post #19 of 20
10/23/07 at 1:24pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Boomstick
I'll never be able to run for office because of this site. I'll get destroyed because of some of the posts I've made here.
Your avatar may cost you the senior vote.
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post #20 of 20
10/23/07 at 1:30pm
I have to say, criticism at this position shows a certain faithlessness and armchair criticism that belies a weak mind. Good for you, Shmun. I have no idea what your fulltime policies are, or if you're the next antichrist and I'm the Deadzone guy who has to assassinate you, but you're taking steps to make sure tomorrow is a better place to live in. Good luck and, just in case, see you in Hell!
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