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Squirrels are starting some shit

post #1 of 24
11/20/07 at 12:20pm
Thread Starter 
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20071120/...uirrel_outages

Quote:
ASHLAND, Wis. - It was an unlucky day for two squirrels and hundreds of Midwestern power customers.

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Brian Elwood, a spokesman for Xcel Energy, said a squirrel came in contact with an overhead transformer and knocked out service to 177 customers Monday. Power was fully restored in just under an hour, and repair crews found the remains of the "unfortunate squirrel," he said.

By coincidence, another squirrel got into a substation 40 miles away in Ironwood, Mich., Monday morning and caused a temporary outage that affected about 1,400 customers in Ironwood and two nearby communities, Elwood said.

The utility takes many preventive steps to keep the curious animals away from lines, he said, but they are one of the leading causes of outages, trailing only severe weather.

"We kind of liken it to anyone who's had a bird feeder and tried to keep the squirrels out," he said. "They find a way."

Rodney Johnson was stuck on an elevator at the city's Enterprise Center, where he works, when the power went out.

"For a couple of minutes there, I wasn't sure if I'd make it to Thanksgiving," said Johnson, who said he is somewhat claustrophobic. "They kept talking to me while they were trying to open it up, though, so that helped."

Once a firefighter opened the door, Johnson wasted no time in getting out.

"I'm surprised I didn't knock him down," he said.
I knew we shouldn't trust these damn things. Why do you think they stockpile all those acorns? It's not for hibernation, but for the coming NUCLEAR WINTER.
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post #2 of 24
11/20/07 at 1:14pm
Sigh, only in Wisconsin (and the UP) is a squirrel knocking power out news ...
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post #3 of 24
11/20/07 at 1:51pm
Down here, skirmishes between us and Squirrels are a common occurence.

Campuses are the worst because the squirrels are used to humans, so they dive bomb people from trees or steal your cookies because they know you aren't going to do shit to them.
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post #4 of 24
11/20/07 at 1:58pm
I knew those squirrels were up to no good. But ya wouldn't listen and now look at 'em!
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post #5 of 24
11/20/07 at 2:41pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Detonathor
Squirrels? They are no match for Barn Swallows.
"You're gonna get RAPED!"

This bird looks pissed.
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post #6 of 24
11/20/07 at 2:45pm
Thread Starter 
That is one freaky, pissed off bird. It has eyes like the devil!
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post #7 of 24
11/20/07 at 4:54pm
...Squirrel Jihad?
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post #8 of 24
11/20/07 at 5:05pm
When I was at Sequoia National Park, there was one campsite that no one would stay in. Right in the middle of the site was a big pine tree full of pine cones. Every time someone would try to use the site, ZING!, you'd see this squirrel bolt up the tree and the branches would begin to shake. Shortly there after, a big green pine cone would drop from the heavens and freak everyone out. The rain of cones would continue until the camper changed sites. I tried to warn one group when they parked their fancy motor home under the tree, but they ignored me. They were certainly surprised when a giant green cone smashed through the sky light and into the motor home.
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post #9 of 24
11/20/07 at 6:11pm
Bah, forget squirrels. I'm waiting for the chance to elevate my personal war against bees to new heights. Bees, wasps, hornets, etc. have a vendetta against me for some unknown reason and have been attacking me for years. It's gotten ridiculous. Fixed a busted outside lamp, get attacked my wasps living in it. Turn off my sprinklers at the source, get attacked my hornets living under the cover. Go to start my grill, get attacked by bees living under the gas cylinder. Trim my holly bush, find out the hard way that yellowjackets built a basketball sized nest inside and attacked me en masse. If only I could train the local squirrel community to help me attack the bees...that would be sweet.
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post #10 of 24
11/20/07 at 6:35pm
I would recommend for your bee troubles an army of ants. In zoological studies and recordings there have been quite a number of conflicts of Hives vs. Colonies. Quite often do the ants overpower the bees/wasps due to the collective efforts of the ants.

Not only are ants effective against bees, they also strike fear into the hearts of others, as I recall the experiment in which a medium sized sack full of ants was dumped onto the ground. The result was that some animals and most insects (including beetles and grasshoppers) dropped everything they were doing and fled.

Start an ant farm and unleash it upon the wasp menace. No, fuck that, start a colony of some of those Klendathu bugs, those bees/wasps/yellowjackets won't know what hit them.
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post #11 of 24
11/20/07 at 7:45pm
My college roommate, who also happens to be one of my best friends (and a lurker, sometimes poster here) was dubbed the Squirrel King in college. He would feed the tons of squirrels we had on campus crums on our way back from lunch, until one day we noticed a large group of them.....waiting for us...then following us and chattering at us the entire way back to our dorm. I told him if he didn't stop I couldn't walk with him anymore, who knows what an organized group of those fuckers could do.
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post #12 of 24
11/21/07 at 12:39pm
Thread Starter 
So, Judge, I'm guessing you haven't seen Bee Movie yet and the very thought of it sends you into covulsions?
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post #13 of 24
11/21/07 at 1:28pm
Maybe we are seeing squirrel/chipmunk suicide attacks because of their opposition to the "Alavin and the Chipmunks" movie...had to make that lame joke.
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post #14 of 24
11/21/07 at 2:57pm
Another fun college squirrel story:
On the way to lunch, we saw a squirrel perched on top of a trash can, head buried in a beer can. On the way back, we saw (presumably) the same squirrel, rolling around the trash can, chattering beligerently at passersby. Yeah, a squirrel that happens to be a mean drunk. You guys go ahead and keep trusting these rodents, I fucking dare you.
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post #15 of 24
11/21/07 at 3:45pm
Thread Starter 
Chris Miller, what kind of crazy, messed up college did you go to?
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post #16 of 24
11/21/07 at 7:00pm
Good old Towson University, home of the squirrels from hell.
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post #17 of 24
11/21/07 at 7:04pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chris Miller
Good old Towson University, home of the squirrels from hell.
Sounds like a new horror movie just waiting to be created.
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post #18 of 24
11/23/07 at 12:46am
Actually, this morning a squirrel was talking shit to me after my approach caused him to flee up a tree, but I was the bigger mammal and walked away.
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post #19 of 24
11/23/07 at 12:54am
He knows you now Chris. He'll be waiting tomorrow. With friends.
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post #20 of 24
11/23/07 at 1:34am
So much for sleep then.
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post #21 of 24
11/25/07 at 5:37am
I have an urban "LA Squirrel" that sits on the power line outside my bathroom window, and yells at who ever's taking a shower at the moment. My fiance, one morning, started squirrel calling back at him/her, and the squirrel went fucking berserk trying to find a way to get from the powerline over to the bathroom window.

God only knows what that feral sonovabitch would do if he could get his or her claws on us.
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post #22 of 24
11/25/07 at 12:26pm
Not if Hunter, when. Your fiance has angered the squirrel, you need to prepare to confront it, or move to the other coast. Squirrels learn quickly people. I remember when I was in high school, we had a bird feeder behind my house. My dad was tired of the squirrels eating all the food before the birds could get to it, so he bought on of those silver domes that keeps the squirrels from climbing the pole. We watched and laughed for a couple hours while the tried to scale the dome and failed. They saw us laughing, chattered at us, then adapted their jumps so that they could leap off a tree and land on the feeder. We tried moving the feeder, but they kept getting to it. Then they killed my father*.




*ok, they didn't kill my dad, but that's only because we moved before they could get organized.
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post #23 of 24
11/25/07 at 4:37pm
Also, back in high school, squirrels sneaked into the attic and tore the shit out of most of our Christmas decorations. Surely that is a sign of true evil. Or maybe it was a Charlie Brown style anti-commercialism thing.
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post #24 of 24
11/26/07 at 12:48pm
Thread Starter 
Maybe the squirrels were Jewish and were sick of your Jesus-lovin' ways?
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