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mean girls at school

post #1 of 49
Thread Starter 
There are these mean girls at school that bother me every day and i am at my wits end... how do i tell them to stop doing what they're doing to me?? I haven't done anything to them and they're getting people to vote against for this talent show we have coming up... i need help!!!

-a confused sophomore
post #2 of 49
Helpful Guide


Is that too harsh? I can't decide if you're a real person or not.
post #3 of 49
We need to know details. How you know them, what they do to you, cup size, etc.
post #4 of 49
They just have penis envy. Slay them with your cock and they will stop teasing you.
post #5 of 49
Quote:
You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to Jonathan Banks is my hero again.
Curse my feeble account, it does not have enough love to spread.
post #6 of 49
I'm sure whatever is on Lifetime right now, it will solve your problem.
post #7 of 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jonathan Banks is my hero
We need to know details. How you know them, what they do to you, cup size, etc.
Don't forget pics...
post #8 of 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kevin K
I'm sure whatever is on Lifetime right now, it will solve your problem.
That will just teach you how to deal with being raped...
post #9 of 49
I'm sure Lifetime will make a special that will have all the answers you need.
post #10 of 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kevin K
I'm sure whatever is on Lifetime right now, it will solve your problem.
Dammit.
post #11 of 49
Seriously though, justdecent, what do these girls do to you? It will help me visualize. Vividly.
post #12 of 49
This is where you get a makeover, slut it up, and put on a BIG MUSICAL NUMBER to win the hearts of the crowd, to those mean girls' chagrin.
post #13 of 49
Then the girls totally want to be friends with you but you're all like "step off, bitches" and they're all like "OMG!"
post #14 of 49
You know, I once saw this movie about mean girls, and this girl was getting picked on by the mean girls, kind of like your mean girls.. and she had to infiltrate their ranks and take the mean girls down from inside, but along the way she almost became one of the mean girls.

I think it was called.. The Bus that Couldn't Slow Down
post #15 of 49
Now that you mention it, I couldn't figure out why the cheerleaders were all wearing helmets. You aren't on the actual team, you silly mean girls!
post #16 of 49
You could always use rumor and innuendo - without any of it getting traced back to you as the source, spread a little dirt on each of the girls. Do it in such a way that each girl will think another girl in their posse is ratting 'em out. Use bathroom walls, the internet, graffiti, etc. Since they'll be accusing each other of being the snitch, they'll be too busy to hassle you.

If they're participants in the talent show, sabotage their act somehow. Pay off the sound guy to throw some feedback and distortion into their act, especially if they have a soloist.

Otherwise, call up your local Mafia don, and ask them for a favor. Always come to them as a friend (invite their family out to dinner on you, bake them some of those delish Italian cookies, etc.), and show them lots and lots of respect. Don't ask them about their business, though. Do this, and your enemies will become their enemies. Then they (your enemies) will fear you.
post #17 of 49
"Mean" like "naughty girl needs discipline/detention/spanking"?
post #18 of 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by harrybeanbag
Wait, were they mean retarded girls? If that's it, then you're getting your suggestion confused with The Shortbus That Couldn't Slow Down.
Wait, I thought that was the one where the mean girls have explicit sex with each other in post-9/11, bohemian New York. That's one of my favorite movies. It was directed by that guy who directed that musical... what's his name? Robert Altman?
post #19 of 49
post #20 of 49
You could always eat them.
post #21 of 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by Anderson
You could always eat them.
Anderson, you never fail to offer up sound and sage advice for us lowly mortals.
post #22 of 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by DARKMITE8
You know, that Russ Meyer had a wise way of looking at everything, didn't he? It's almost like he'd had mean girls messing with him and his talent show performance back in the day and just *knew* that someone else could benefit from his experience.
post #23 of 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by FreeRobotSex
What do their fingers smell like?
Victory.
post #24 of 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cervaise
Victory.


VICTORY!!
post #25 of 49
Its a miracle what you can do with Photoshop these days.
post #26 of 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by Trejo
Wait a second, the girls' fingers smell like Kevin Dillon?

No, never mind, I don't want to know.
post #27 of 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by LisaNewYork
Here's what you do: Next time one of them gets their period and is taking a shower after gym class, just pelt her with tampons and pads while screaming "PLUG IT UP, PLUG IT UP!". This totally works, I guarantee. And if you can't time it to synch up the period with the shower, another route is to dump pig's blood on them at the prom. THAT'S surefire, although I can't guarantee that you'll escape the ensuing carnage afterwards. But you know, give it a try, and if you manage to not die in a fiery blaze of gym equipment and tissue paper flowers, come back and let us know how it went.
Sage advice. I'd also stay away from their "dirty pillows" just in case. And remember pimples are the Lord's way of chastising you.
post #28 of 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by Timothy225
Otherwise, call up your local Mafia don, and ask them for a favor.
You don't ask him for a favor. You do him a favor. Then he will offer you a favor. Then you have the mean girls' legs broken.
post #29 of 49
If you're havin' trouble with your high school head
He's givin' you the blues
You wanna graduate but not in 'is bed
Here's what you gotta do
Pick up the phone, I'm always home
Call me anytime
Just ring: three-six-two-four-three-six, hey
I lead a life of crime

Dirty deeds done dirt cheap

You got problems in your life of love
You got a broken heart
He's double-dealin' with your best friend
That's when the teardrops start FELLA, well-uh
Pick up the phone, I'm here alone
Or make a social call
Come right in, forget about him
We'll have ourselves a ball, eh

You got a lady and you want her gone
But you ain't got the guts
She keeps naggin' at you night 'n' day
Enough to drive you nuts
Pick up the phone, leave her alone
It's time you made a stand
For a fee, I'm happy to be
Your back door man, hey

Dirty deeds done dirt cheap

Concrete shoes
Cyanide
T.N.T
Done dirt cheap
Ooo, neckties
Contracts
High voltage
Done dirt cheap
post #30 of 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by Belethedheliel
You don't ask him for a favor. You do him a favor. Then he will offer you a favor. Then you have the mean girls' legs broken.
Oops. I-I fucked up my Mafia etiquette! Mea culpa, Belethedheliel, mea culpa. Please don't tell the don!
post #31 of 49
I'm not sure if you have to worry about sabotage in the talent show if you're already labeling yourself as "justdecent" . Maybe instead of sulking about mean girls, you could try to be "alittlebetterthanaverage".
post #32 of 49
Fuck their boyfriends and rub it in their faces?
post #33 of 49
Just curious, justdecent (!), what is your talent show act going to be, anyway? I only ask because these crazy kids...



...might be hard to beat.
post #34 of 49
Get your mom to sign you up a myspace account, then emotionally break them.
post #35 of 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by horrid
Get your mom to sign you up a myspace account, then emotionally break them.
I'd stay away from Facebook though, we saw where that got Owen.
post #36 of 49
Thread Starter 
nice lol

Some of these girls were writing nasty things about me in the bathroom and i found out about it and tried to confront them but one of the girls slapped me... and boy did it hurt...

but the school has a talent show coming up and i want to do a dance routine since im on the dance team and theyre cheerleaders and theyre causing all this drama..
post #37 of 49
i know u're not fat but why dont you just watch nikki blonsky this weekend
post #38 of 49
post #39 of 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by justdecent
nice lol

Some of these girls were writing nasty things about me in the bathroom and i found out about it and tried to confront them but one of the girls slapped me... and boy did it hurt...

but the school has a talent show coming up and i want to do a dance routine since im on the dance team and theyre cheerleaders and theyre causing all this drama..
1. Should have punched her back. Breaking a girl's nose ruins her day.

2. Should have gone to the cops and prosecuted her for battery. Getting arrested and being on probation for high school and college ruins a girl's day, too.

And if you really think you'll show them up and change the dynamics of high school by competing in a talent competition... man, you need to get out of the movies and into the real world. No wonder they make fun of you.
post #40 of 49
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by 1of3Kings
i know u're not fat but why dont you just watch nikki blonsky this weekend
I actually saw a commercial for her new movie "Queen Sized" today.. I don't know if it will help me feel better but if I have nothing to do this Saturday at 9pm I guess I'll watch it. It didn't look bad
post #41 of 49
And... the other shoe drops. I've never heard of this show, but I have a sneaking suspicion it airs on a certain womens' network...
post #42 of 49
Can I just say that Kevin K's avatar FREAKS ME THE FUCK OUT?

Thank you.
post #43 of 49
You're not the only one affected by it, Jacob. What's it from?
post #44 of 49
I've seen it before, but can't remember.
post #45 of 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by gravedigger
What's it from?
The Adventures of SuperPup. See disc #13 on your Ultimate Superman Collection DVD set, if you have it.
post #46 of 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by justdecent
I actually saw a commercial for her new movie "Queen Sized" today.. I don't know if it will help me feel better but if I have nothing to do this Saturday at 9pm I guess I'll watch it. It didn't look bad
BEHOLD

Maybe you are Nikki Blonsky. Maybe you should just unplug your fucking modem.
post #47 of 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by justdecent
but the school has a talent show coming up and i want to do a dance routine since im on the dance team and theyre cheerleaders and theyre causing all this drama..
You've been served! I think a Dance-Off (with obligatory knife-fighting) is the only way to go in this case.
post #48 of 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by DARKMITE8
You've been served! I think a Dance-Off (with obligatory knife-fighting) is the only way to go in this case.
I'll second a West Side Story action sequence.
post #49 of 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by billylove
I'll second a West Side Story action sequence.
As long as we medley into Beat It, you're on!
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