What Super Power Would You Like to Have? - Page 2

Flight, definitely.

I guess I'm the only want that wants to read minds. I mean knowing someone's intent, ideas, id would probably be more powerful than mind control.

Think about this, if you knew everything about someone, you could coerce them into whatever situation you wanted. It would be mind control = strong pimp hand.

Plus, you could easily get laid because while you were talking to women or heck even scanning the room, you could instantly cut out the bullshit. Also, you would instantly know if someone wanted to hurt you in any way and you would easily be able to avoid or alter the situation to you liking.

I'm pretty sure if you could read minds, you could dominate the world in a few months or a year.

But if you got the power to read minds, every time you went out you'd be able to hear the thoughts of every single person you encountered. The din would drive you mad.

I've thought of this, but I would think with practice you could be as expansive or collective as you want.

Yeah, you'd be able to control that stuff. Wouldn't be an open gate with no close switch, yeah?

As for me, either invulnerability or the power of exact change. All I would need is a pocket and I can pay for anything, cash in hand, and in the appropriate bill and change denominations! It's like being infinitely rich, so long as I had pockets.

If you had time travel, wouldn't the time lords come after you with shock sticks and shove your time altering ass into a void dimension for eternity?

I'd like to be able to speak every language.

'Course, you could also play the stock market - go back in time, invest in IBM or Microsoft as they're starting out, and when you get back you'd have so much money Donald Trump would be your doorman.

OR you could be the Lisa in Da Vinci's Mona Lisa if you go back far enough. Then you'd be famous and shit.

I'd like to be able to absorb everyone's powers a la Peter Petrelli, and then NEVER FUCKING USE THEM, a la Peter Petrelli.

Photographic reflexes, the best semi-plausible superpower ever.

I thought teleportation would be more popular. It's the ultimate convenience. For me it would be a toss-up between that or telepathy/mind-reading. I think I'd go with telepathy if I were stunningly attractive and charismatic. I'd hate to know what people were thinking about me if it wasn't good. I'm insecure.

I would recommend to everyone that if, no matter how unlikely, you do wind up with a superpower or two, for fuck's sake do some research. Read comics, watch films related to your power, and learn how to use them and more importantly what NOT to do.

Say you can turn invisible. Watch Hollow Man so you can avoid being turned into crispy Bacon. So you're immortal now? Take a page from Highlander, do something to protect your neck.

Also, if several of you have powers, team-up! We could use a JLA, Fantastic 4, etc. right about now. Learn strategy, team tactics, etc. Or, if you decide to get all villainous and shit, remember not to tell the hero your plans until 35 minutes after its been carried out. Fuck death traps too - use your power to waste your adversary immediately (watch any James Bond movie or 60s Batman episode).

Remember, knowledge is power, it's one to grow on, now you know and knowing is half the power.

Another benefit of super telepathy is that you could alter EVERYONE'S perception of you. You could be 300 pounds, have a full face of pubic hair that has no business being mentioned in the same breath as a beard and wear retarded niche genre t-shirts coupled with a 5 year old sports coat and it wouldn't matter!

I would definitely be for teleportation. Globe trot with ease, rob banks like in the Jumper trailer, and just have a good time. Why bother being invisible if you can teleport into the girl's locker room have a glimpse, then disappear and go elsewhere.

Have you read The Man Who Folded Himself by David Gerrold? It's a pretty amazing little book about, among other things, scenarios like that one. It's a colossal mindfuck and, in addition, a very good read. I highly recommend it.

I think you folks are looking at the wrong powers here. My vote for superpower would be....

The Cheney Power.

You got invisibility (unless you want to be seen)

You gotcher mind control.

You got invulnerability.

You got your hot chicks ("come on, baby...it's good for the security of the country....for the children...honest. Don't let the terrorists win.")

Also, unlike the Incredibles or the mutants or the guys in Watchmen, you can't be held accountable for the buildings you destroy or the lives you ruin. No one's gonna be filing suit against MY ass in the future. Godzilla? Class action waiting to happen. Supes, too.

Flying on Air Force Two may not be as cool as being on fire yourself, but it gets you where you're wanting to go.

Two words to the Pentagon and you basically got an army to throw at someone.

Gadgets and toys? Call the boys at Haliburton and have them send up Lucious Fox or the equivalent and take your pick.

What's not to love, eh?

But you'd be bald and talking out of the side of your mouth. Hell at least you'd get the ladies with The Clinton Power

I'd have my own score. Preferably John Williams.

Having a score would be awesome. But I say you should have the ability to change it. I mean who wouldn't want to have a 70s funk score when walking down the street. No matter how white you'd be it still would be awesome.

I'd like to see the world in crystal clear widescreen, maybe even High Def. Why you ask? Because everything looks better in wide screen!

The world would get a lot uglier though. Seeing every pore on people's face as they past by.

I'd go for a Basil Poledouris theme.

A Hans Zimmer score would certainly liven up your life. But it would be very strange to hear such dramatic music when getting coffee.

A Danny Elfman score could certainly liven things up.

Would only you be able to hear the score, or does everyone around you have to enjoy as well?

Starship Troopers theme while shitting brownies. It would be awesome and awkward all at the same time. Much like the movie...

It would have to be area effect.

Everyone would hear the score. It would be awesome if I was getting emotional in a movie and my personal score swelled up just as the score in the movie swelled up. Then people would yell at me, and I'd tell them that I'd turn it down once they stopped texting.

Aah, so you have the power to turn the volume down then? Starting to sound more and more awesome with each passing minute.

I think most of mine would be the theme from Brazil, only the chopped up version used in the Wall-E trailer. The same refrain over and over again for eight hours of cubicle work a day. Huzzah.

I have read that, and it is a great book. But I was assuming I'd be able to turn it on and off. Doesn't do the FBI any good to look for an invisible man if I'm walking around all normal.

Anyway, I might be getting converted to the mind control idea. There don't seem to be a lot of downsides to that.

I think the only downside to mind control, is personal control. You could get frustrated with some body that you like and tell them to get bent. And they would probably actually "get bent".

The thing is, if your a supervisor and people heard angry music they would dodge you knowing that you're pissed.

Well, I would hope you'd have control over your score. You wouldn't want to be on a date with someone, and have her hear the sinister stalker music instead of the romantic music. That would bring the date to a close right there.

You assume The Evil Cheney knows what a bed is for. The Evil Cheney NEVER sleeps.

Never.

Sleep tight.

On a lighter note, if we're talkin' scores, I'm daring to be different - gimme some Motorhead (Deaf Forever) or some Rush (New World Man would seem appropos of my reality warping powers) and I'm a happy camper.

Also, CODE NAMES! Not one mention of what our code names would be? We need code names to protect our secret IDs and eventual action figure sales!
Call me The Imagineer! DUN-DUN-DUNNNNNN!!!!!

I'd want to have Doctor Manhattan's power, to manipulate matter at the subatomic level. If I got tired of messing around with this world, I'd just leave and build another one. Also, and this a huge bonus, I'd get to walk around naked and no one would ever say shit to me about it.

Most of these powers would allow you to walk around naked. Invisibility, however, is the only one for which it's necessary.

I'd go for The Flash's power. I want my own fucking Speed Force. No more airfares, no delays on my work schedule, and I could even go back/forward in time if I chose to.

No red suit with little yellow wings and a lightning bolt, and I'm a happy speed demon.

Who's Next?-era The Who would do my theme music. And it would be glorious.

My codename? Feat. (It's a pun! Wakka wakka.)

I think I'd have to go with the mind control. I wouldn't want to use it all the time because I'd get sick of it and the hollow and empty feelings would come up, but it would be so satisfying to use every now and then to kind of nudge people in the right direction. If I saw a guy I really really liked I'd be able to just nudge him in the right direction, get him to come over and flirt with me and then see where it goes from there. Or if applying for a job I could make the employer think I'm charming and hardworking. (Ha!)

I've thought long and hard about the telepathy thing, it used to be my most preferred super power, but on further consideration I think it would probably lead to me killing myself. I don't REALLY want to know what people are thinking about me, I'd be so damn curious though I just wouldn't be able to help myself and I'd always be listening in.

Just hearing little things like 'She's got a huge zit' or 'Wow, that's an annoying laugh' or 'I hate that shirt' would destroy me! I'd get so self conscious I'd never want to leave my room. Everyone thinks little bad thoughts about everyone else every day, and I'd honestly rather not know.

Also, most people are such fucking morons that that would be enough to make me put a gun to my head after awhile. I just really don't want to know what people are thinking, it's easier to imagine they are semi-intelligent and considering something important than to listen in and hear shit about how the next episode of American Idol is coming up or how they are looking forward to their next church meeting on how to kill the gays and rid the world of condoms.

And imagine all the sick shit you'd hear sometimes! We all probably walk past psychos on the street every day and don't know it, but if you got curious and started listening in you'd probably hear things about how people want to go out and fuck some hookers in the ass then strangle them, or how they have the bodies of little boys buried in their basement and need to put down another coat of lime to cover up the smell.

In short, people in general are awful, stupid and disgusting. Sometimes completely evil. Just hearing the words people say out loud is enough to drive me into a fit of depression, telepathy would eventually break me.

Mind control though, there's something you can use without driving yourself insane.

Self conscious? You? Nah!

The power to heal, baby! That's what I'd get. Truth be told, I'd abuse it to no end, charging people and pretending to be the messiah and all that. But I'm sure my guilt would get the better of me and I'd go around to hospitals curing everyone in sight. It would be great revenge for all the people in the emergency room thread! Of course it would lead to sticky moral quandries and all that, but man, what a power it would be. The press and book deals alone would be worth it!

See, that's the beauty of my little mastery over telepathy clarification.

All the benefits of being able to listen in...but with the experience and control to know when not to do it!

Also, if someone was thinking stupid thoughts about you, you could always just alter them. Don't like their zit-focused judgemental ways? Easily fixed! Thoughts of evil dust bunnies chasing them around their bathroom for all!

Werewolf Girl, if you ever read my mind when I'm near you I'm probably thinking about your tits. No offense or anything, I just think about sex most of the time.


Edit: And of course I would be reading your mind reading my mind and I would apologize for being a complete pig jerk face. Of course, if you didn't like my thoughts.

Oh and theme music super power would kick in and the Crash Test Dummies would start playing...

Earlier when I said I'd like to be able to read minds, or have telepathy (I'd like to be able to both telesend and telereceive) I wasn't thinking about actual mind control, and the distinction is notable to me.

I don't like the idea of being able to outright control someone's thoughts or actions. I think it would be more fun to be able to read minds and use that to avoid doing things that people might expect you to do, or to do things that they might want you to do but couldn't bring themselves to ask you to do.

For example, some people can set subtle mental traps for you-- bait you into saying or doing something to make you look stupid, get you into trouble, or worse. Some people just like to fuck with your head like that, and they don't always do it consciously. It'd be nice to be able to put a stop to that kind of vicious behavior by avoiding those "traps."

On the other hand, some people who you respect and whose respect you'd like to gain have subtle, unvoicable expectations of you, and it would be nice to surprise those people by living up to those expectations via mind-reading. I don't know how often I've failed to impress a girl because I couldn't figure out what she was thinking, what she wanted out of me. Telepathy would be great for that.

No woman needs telepathy to know what a man is thinking. Just assume he's picturing you naked, and 70% of the time, you're right.

Werewolf Girl,

He's joking. It's way higher than 70%.

Well, I was leaving plenty of room for the gay guys.

Yeah James. What are ya? A gay-hater?

If I had telepathy, I'd already know. Think about that.

Every once in a while I assume someone is telepathic and think up weird shit just to see how they would react.

re: being subtle and laying mind traps...

Yeah, but sometimes I'm so busy I can't physically babysit a shoplifter. Mind control allows me to a) recover my product and b) cause the person to punch themselves in the face a few times.

Everyone goes home happy.

I swear to God, if I were gifted with this power, I would only use it on shoplifters and I would still be the most satisfied person on the planet.

I belatedly second the recommendation, by the way. One of my favorite time travel stories of all time. I'd tell you why I think it's so awesome and innovative, but that would be a spoiler.