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A Trend I've Noticed With Greeting Cards

post #1 of 18
1/30/08 at 4:58pm
Thread Starter 
An appalling amount of them pertain to farting.
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post #2 of 18
1/30/08 at 5:07pm
I've noticed more and more of the cards with sound chips in them. Have they combined those with the comedic concept of passing gas?
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post #3 of 18
1/30/08 at 5:09pm
Like someone said in another thread, how long until the number 1 movie in america is a shot of an Ass for 2 hours?
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post #4 of 18
1/30/08 at 5:12pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by El Tati View Post
Like someone said in another thread, how long until the number 1 movie in america is a shot of an Ass for 2 hours?
See "Meet The Spartans".
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post #5 of 18
1/30/08 at 5:18pm
Well, it depends on the ass in question. Jessica Alba's? Alright, if I got nothing better to do for two hours (and I usually don't).
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post #6 of 18
1/30/08 at 5:24pm
Maybe I'm an asshole, but I almost never read the boilerplate text in greeting cards. I'm wondering if I've missed a bunch of good fart jokes in the last decade.
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post #7 of 18
1/30/08 at 5:27pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Minsky View Post
Maybe I'm an asshole, but I almost never read the boilerplate text in greeting cards.
Especially if there's no money or check inside the said card.
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post #8 of 18
1/30/08 at 5:28pm
True, I see cards like an orange. I don't want what's on the outside, I want the check from a distant relative on the inside.

Edit: Dammit, Martin, beat me to it!
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post #9 of 18
1/30/08 at 5:35pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Minsky View Post
Maybe I'm an asshole, but I almost never read the boilerplate text in greeting cards. I'm wondering if I've missed a bunch of good fart jokes in the last decade.
Remove the word "good" and yes, you have.
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post #10 of 18
1/30/08 at 5:44pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by James Kimbell View Post
Remove the word "good" and yes, you have.
You're probably right. "Good" fart jokes typically incorporate irony by pooh-poohing conventional social mores of the day while illustrating the follies of human vanity, and I just don't see Hallmark following through with that.
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post #11 of 18
1/30/08 at 5:48pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Minsky View Post
pooh-poohing
I get it.
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post #12 of 18
1/30/08 at 6:22pm
Thread Starter 
I appreciate the guffaws that this topic has incited, but I don't know if we're really addressing the problem. There was a time when if you wanted cards that dealt in fart humor you'd have to go to Spencer's or the local car wash. That was fine. This way frat boys and longshoremen knew exactly where they needed to go to get those type of cards.

But now I have to see these cards at Target right next to good-natured cards featuring beloved characters like Linus, Goofy, and Deputy Barney Fife. It's not even so much my sensibilities that I'm thinking of. I think of my Mom when she sees this smut. I think of my aunt. I think of my sister. Well, maybe not so much my sister. There isn't much she hasn't done, had done to her, had done on her, or had done down her throat that's gonna cause her to recoil at a greeting card about ass gas.
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post #13 of 18
1/30/08 at 6:59pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Moltisanti View Post
I appreciate the guffaws that this topic has incited, but I don't know if we're really addressing the problem. There was a time when if you wanted cards that dealt in fart humor you'd have to go to Spencer's or the local car wash. That was fine. This way frat boys and longshoremen knew exactly where they needed to go to get those type of cards.
Not to derail here but you've got longshoreman where you are? Wait a second.
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post #14 of 18
1/30/08 at 7:02pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Moltisanti View Post
There isn't much she hasn't done, had done to her, had done on her, or had done down her throat that's gonna cause her to recoil at a greeting card about ass gas.
She sounds like she has a good personality. Can I get some contact info?
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post #15 of 18
1/30/08 at 7:02pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Moltisanti View Post
I think of my sister. Well, maybe not so much my sister. There isn't much she hasn't done, had done to her, had done on her, or had done down her throat that's gonna cause her to recoil at a greeting card about ass gas.
Can I meet your sister? She sounds pretty cool.

EDIT: I'm sure Molt's sister wouldn't have a problem meeting both me AND Trejo at the same time...
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post #16 of 18
1/30/08 at 7:03pm
Moltisanti has a sister? Damn I can't even imagine what his family must be like.
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post #17 of 18
1/30/08 at 7:06pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by EdHocken View Post
Moltisanti has a sister? Damn I can't even imagine what his family must be like.
I imagine thanksgiving involves lots of turkey, and lots of Lundgren. Occasional drunken fist fights over which 80's action franchise is better. Basically, we should all wish our family was that cool.

Brendan: Canadian Bacon invasion?

Sorry, totally derailing this thing. Of course, I think I'm the guy keeping these fart card companies in business.. I just can't buy serious cards for any occasion. Birthdays, weddings, get wells, all must be humorous. I going to feel really bad when someone close to me dies and I get a 'wacky' condolences card about getting fart hot-boxed in the casket.
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post #18 of 18
1/30/08 at 7:12pm
Thread Starter 
You fellas can meet my sister but be careful. She's had more needles in her than my diabetic brother.
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