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Ever Try Explaining a Chewer Get Together to Someone?

post #1 of 59
4/28/08 at 10:38pm
Thread Starter 
I recently returned from a vacation to Disney World, and while there managed to meet up and have a beer with Darkmite8, whom I've been chummy with on the boards for a long while, but I'd neevr met in RL. This didn't seem to me like it should be perceived as odd, but my wife and her sister and my brother in law razzed mea great deal. They seemed astonished that I'd want to meet someone I'd only known through the boards. They wanted to know how I knew this person wasn't a psycho killer or something (I can assure you after meeting him that he isn't), which was a thought that had never crossed MY mind.

Returning to work today, I met with much the same reaction from my co-workers when they asked how my vacation went. I then noted that I'm considering a NJ area Chewer gathering at my place in July. I was somewhat disappointed that I didn't get to meet any of the four other Chewers I know were at the NY Comicon last weekend; I was looking forward to it, if I could have managed it. I noted also that the DC Chewers have stated several times thay get together now & again, and I saw mention of at least one LA area Chewer gathering. So apaprently, we're by nature a social bunch, drawn in many instances to each others' company, based solely on the contents of our posts. I know I kind of feel as if I know some of you fairly well, and would love to meet many of you. And I was flattered as all get out by the number of people who listed me among their choices for the "Chewers I'd Like to get High With" thread.

I guess this message board culture we're all a part of is a thing unto itself and you just can't explain it to someone who isn't a post whore themselves. I've been posting on MB's for the better part of ten years in one place or another, but this is by far the best one I've been involved in. Certainly the only one I've cared to try to meet fellow posters from. So I'm just curious: have any of you who have managed to meet up with fellow Chewers, or tried to, met with similar reactions? Do your friends/family/co-workers just not get this, and look at you strangely when yo discuss it?
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post #2 of 59
4/28/08 at 10:45pm
Yeah, people think its strange. I only talk about CHUD with people who are on or know about the boards. What is weirder to me is actually meeting Chewers and constantly calling them by their username. It's not so bad now as people have changed their user names to their real names. But back in the day, it was quite funny to see a bunch of us at a bar.

"Hey girlcreeture."
"Hey Diva."
"What up, Johnny Butane!"
"Sup, Deev."
"Meet Lowshot."
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post #3 of 59
4/28/08 at 10:59pm
Thread Starter 
Actually, that doesn't seem strange to me. These are personas we've voluntarily assumed. I wouldn't be offended at all if I was referred to as "Iggy" by a Chewer I met in RL. But I guess I can see why it might make others feel wierd to be called by their username when the person you're speaking to knows your real name. Wondering if the person in question is one of those people might make a conversation feel a little awkward.
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post #4 of 59
4/28/08 at 11:37pm
It's a digital age. People need to get used to it.

Before this, there was what? Phone calls and letter writing.

Besides, I've made some really good friends from this message board.
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post #5 of 59
4/28/08 at 11:38pm
Try meeting people internationally. My sister thought I was a complete freak.
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post #6 of 59
4/29/08 at 12:13am
When I talked to a few of my friends about the notion of finding out if there were any Chewers in the Austin area next time I went to ACL, I was met with exactly the same kind of scorn some of you have described. Jokes were made ("What, are you guys gonna go cosplay 80s movies or something?", etc.) of course, but I guess I never realized that meeting people you've only known from experience on a message board is still a little out there. To my friends anyway.

So. Anyone in the Austin area wanna hang out this summer?
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post #7 of 59
4/29/08 at 12:14am
I've said to other people "I'm meeting some people from the message board I hang at". As for the name thing, I typically try to switch over to real names but I can't always remember. For example I saw Ratty at the New Bev a couple weeks back and just called him by his screen nic because I just can't remember.
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post #8 of 59
4/29/08 at 12:21am
You guys are my only friends, so I've got nothing to worry about.

Of course, I think this effect is lessened in the young folks. My roommate has met up with people he knows through WoW, half the people I know have IRL friends that they met first through facebook groups, etc. It's still weird, but it's only nerdy - as described in Andrew's post - instead of incomprehensible.
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post #9 of 59
4/29/08 at 12:31am
Quote:
Originally Posted by EdHocken View Post
I've said to other people "I'm meeting some people from the message board I hang at". As for the name thing, I typically try to switch over to real names but I can't always remember. For example I saw Ratty at the New Bev a couple weeks back and just called him by his screen nic because I just can't remember.
How about those whose handles are similar to a real life name, but not actually their real life names? That makes my tiny brain hurt.
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post #10 of 59
4/29/08 at 12:32am
oh yeah, but see I remember your real name simply because your screen nic is just not pronounceable. (Yes You've told me many times and my mind is pretty much a sieve at these things)
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post #11 of 59
4/29/08 at 12:34am
If I ever meet Walt Goggins in real life, I'm calling him Molti.
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post #12 of 59
4/29/08 at 12:37am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Andrew Eaton View Post
When I talked to a few of my friends about the notion of finding out if there were any Chewers in the Austin area next time I went to ACL, I was met with exactly the same kind of scorn some of you have described. Jokes were made ("What, are you guys gonna go cosplay 80s movies or something?", etc.) of course, but I guess I never realized that meeting people you've only known from experience on a message board is still a little out there. To my friends anyway.

So. Anyone in the Austin area wanna hang out this summer?
Ooo Oooo! Pick Jared!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Belethedheliel View Post
How about those whose handles are similar to a real life name, but not actually their real life names? That makes my tiny brain hurt.
One time, Frank sent me a PM and signed it with his real name...I quoted the PM and called him Frank, anyway.

On topic, I've been blabbing to anybody who'll listen about CHUD for years now...so pretty much everybody I know is aware of the community built up around this site. I've gotten maybe a raised eyebrow or two from people in the past but, for the most, part, my friends are family are cool with hearing about CHUD-related shenanigans.
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post #13 of 59
4/29/08 at 12:56am
Quote:
Originally Posted by James Kimbell View Post
If I ever meet Walt Goggins in real life, I'm calling him Molti.
Well we've seen what Molt looks like and it doesn't look like Shane. Hell I'm surprised the guy hasn't come down to LA from that castle in Sacramento. It's freaking Sacramento*, need I say more.


*Still, at least it's not Fresno.
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post #14 of 59
4/29/08 at 1:02am
The explanation is simple. Bukkake.
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post #15 of 59
4/29/08 at 11:35am
I've got friends that have met semi-strangers through car forums, gaming forums, etc. People just need to realize it's another way to meet people, and it's not a chat room. Cause everyone knows pedophiles, serial killers, and organ collectors use chat rooms.

Honestly, when I think about it, those people that had negative comments when I mentioned I met so and so through a message board, don't have many friends. The friends they have are family members and people they knew from school or work.
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post #16 of 59
4/29/08 at 11:41am
I say "I'm going to meet friends". Any more information isn't really necessary.

As for real names v. fake names, the DC crew made a collective decision that we'd feel pathetic using handles, so we made a concerted effort to learn each other's names. Luckily, outside of yours truly, the rest of us have pretty easy to remember names.
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post #17 of 59
4/29/08 at 11:53am
Quote:
Originally Posted by EdHocken View Post
I've said to other people "I'm meeting some people from the message board I hang at". As for the name thing, I typically try to switch over to real names but I can't always remember. For example I saw Ratty at the New Bev a couple weeks back and just called him by his screen nic because I just can't remember.
That's okay. Everyone around us probably just assumed we were in a street gang.
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post #18 of 59
4/29/08 at 11:54am
I remember your real name, LD. It's not so hard. In fact, I remember it because it's unusual (let's say I feel a certain sympathy). But if I ever get to meet any of you, you can call me Zooey all you want.

My sister, who met a woman online and moved to Australia for two years to be with her, still makes fun of Dave and I for having internet friends. The cognitive dissonance makes me a little dizzy.
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post #19 of 59
4/29/08 at 12:00pm
I actually quite enjoy being called 'Doc' by Chewers I meet. Makes me feel all warm and fuzzy and important, like an actual doctor!

I've all but stopped talking about my internet friends to my room-mate, who is my best IRL friend, he has this either phobia or resistance to meeting anyone anywhere on-line. He can't stand messageboards, thinks everyone is crazy yet, at the same time, is rather lonely and does not have the time to go to bars and actually meet people (not that he would go to a singles bar for the very same reason he doesn't want to strike up a relationship with people on-line: clearly, anyone looking for some human connection on-line is obviously retarded).

All that and yet my g/f and I are proof positive you can meet not crazy people on-line.

Sigh...
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post #20 of 59
4/29/08 at 12:46pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Doc Happenin View Post

All that and yet my g/f and I are proof positive you can meet not crazy people on-line.
Crazy is relative.
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post #21 of 59
4/29/08 at 12:59pm
I've met a few of you, and I've loved every one that I've met. This goes out to you Chavez, DaveB, Zooey, Guttenberg (Where the fuck have you been?), Avalon, and HAM.
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post #22 of 59
4/29/08 at 1:01pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Doc Happenin View Post
I actually quite enjoy being called 'Doc' by Chewers I meet. Makes me feel all warm and fuzzy and important, like an actual doctor!
I get the same feeling when I'm called Hocken, makes me feel like an actual member of police squad.
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post #23 of 59
4/29/08 at 1:05pm
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Densha_Otoko
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post #24 of 59
4/29/08 at 1:16pm
Usernames are contextual. They are created for the specific purpose of expressing a certain persona related to whatever online community you are a part of. It feels weird to then use that name in another context. I remember when Devin's way of getting under people's skin was calling them by their real names when he was going after them. It made it that much more a personal attack. Times have changed and people willingly use their real names as their user names, but to me my online life and my "real" life are not interchangeable. It's like when my work friends meet my college friends. Both sets of friends know me in a completely different context and merging the two feels weird. That said, I've had a great time hanging out with Chewers in person. I've attended several get-togethers and they were all a blast.

On another note, what's even more bizarre is when you meet a significant other of someone on the boards and know all this shit about them. Alex Riviello and I ran into each other in a store recently. We had never met in person, but he recognized me and called me by my real name (I can only imagine what my friend would have thought if he yelled out "Diva"). Alex was with his fiancee, and I congratulated her on their engagement and she looked at me oddly like, "How do you know that?" Alex then tells her that I'm the subject of the "Diva's ass" thread. We both nodded at each other like, "Yeah, we both both know way too much about each other for having never met." I later PMed Alex and we had a laugh about it.
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post #25 of 59
4/29/08 at 1:25pm
I've got a trip planned to the DC (my brother lives in Frederick) area in September and am hoping to plan a meet up (if time permits) with some of the Chewers down there. I certainly don't think it's that odd.

When Mrs H and I went to Ireland we e-mailed the local SCA list to arrange a pub meet up so we could get some local perspective on the country. Had a blast, they gave us some good advice, and we had a huge party with them when we got back from touring the island. Welcome to the new world!
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post #26 of 59
4/29/08 at 1:31pm
I have never met anyone from the boards but I have two good reasons for it. I think there is only one other Chewer within 100 miles and I am so horribly shy that I struggle to make eye contact with myself in a mirror, let alone actual people.
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post #27 of 59
4/29/08 at 1:36pm
Between GTA IV and this thread, I'm really missing living near NYC.
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post #28 of 59
4/29/08 at 1:46pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by billylove View Post
Cause everyone knows pedophiles, serial killers, and organ collectors use chat rooms.
In my defense, I haven't been in the CHUD chat as often lately.
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post #29 of 59
4/29/08 at 2:22pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Doc Happenin View Post
I actually quite enjoy being called 'Doc' by Chewers I meet. Makes me feel all warm and fuzzy and important, like an actual doctor!
I'm still not playing cards with you.
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post #30 of 59
4/29/08 at 2:28pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Diva View Post
Usernames are contextual. They are created for the specific purpose of expressing a certain persona related to whatever online community you are a part of. It feels weird to then use that name in another context. I remember when Devin's way of getting under people's skin was calling them by their real names when he was going after them. It made it that much more a personal attack. Times have changed and people willingly use their real names as their user names, but to me my online life and my "real" life are not interchangeable. It's like when my work friends meet my college friends. Both sets of friends know me in a completely different context and merging the two feels weird. That said, I've had a great time hanging out with Chewers in person. I've attended several get-togethers and they were all a blast.
Hi, my name's not really Jim! I prefer a username on here, for a couple of reasons.

1) it mortifies me to google my own name (come on, you've done it too) and find some lame stupid shit I wrote on some usenet group ten years ago. I have a very low threshold for embarrassment. Hence with a username I can maintain some anonymity and keep my online and real lives separate.

2) my real name sucks. I was saddled with a first name that men or women can have, yet for some reason everyone who reads my real name and doesn't know who I actually am assumes I'm a girl. It's annoying and embarassing. So a username sidesteps that issue.

Also, I am a shy bastard. I haven't met any Chewers in real life, but I also live on an island with a small population so there are probably very few Chewers here anyway.
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post #31 of 59
4/29/08 at 2:31pm
I was hoping to meet up with DaveB and Miss Zooey at the New Pornographer's concert in Madison last week, but alas...

So thus far, I have not met anyone from the boards in person. I've chatted with a few via instant messenger, and I'm friends with a ton of you bastards on the Facebook, but no IRL meetings yet. Hopefully someday...
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post #32 of 59
4/29/08 at 2:32pm
well, hey James Kimbell! I was at Purdue last night..but thats about the closest I'm going to get to a fellow chud...not like im against meeting anyone but I do think that a Chud convention would be AWESOME, get Nick and Devin there and all us board members..and watch the fist fights! open bar yes?
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post #33 of 59
4/29/08 at 2:32pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissZooey View Post
I remember your real name, LD. It's not so hard. In fact, I remember it because it's unusual (let's say I feel a certain sympathy). But if I ever get to meet any of you, you can call me Zooey all you want.

My sister, who met a woman online and moved to Australia for two years to be with her, still makes fun of Dave and I for having internet friends. The cognitive dissonance makes me a little dizzy.
Well, you also come across my real name a few times a week, and vice-versa. I actually love having an unusual name.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ryan S~ View Post
I've got a trip planned to the DC (my brother lives in Frederick) area in September and am hoping to plan a meet up (if time permits) with some of the Chewers down there. I certainly don't think it's that odd.
That sounds awfully possible to me.
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post #34 of 59
4/29/08 at 2:36pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Peter Venkman View Post
I do think that a Chud convention would be AWESOME
There was an industrial band called A CHUD Convention. It was a one-off project featuring members of Skinny Puppy and à;Grumh. They released one EP, "Sorrow", in 1987.

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post #35 of 59
4/29/08 at 2:40pm
Would there be CHUD associated panels? Would we have such things as "An evening with Moltisanti" and "LA chewers vs. NY Chewers"?
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post #36 of 59
4/29/08 at 2:44pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Peter Venkman View Post
I do think that a Chud convention would be AWESOME, get Nick and Devin there and all us board members..and watch the fist fights! open bar yes?
I think an open bar would be required, if only so I could go wheeling through the room, yelling, "Alright, which one of you humps is Uncle Cthulhu? Out with it!"

edit -

Quote:
Originally Posted by Chris Olson
I was hoping to meet up with DaveB and Miss Zooey at the New Pornographer's concert in Madison last week, but alas...
We were there. Were you? Had dinner at Tutto Pasta, ice cream at The Chocolate Shoppe, and took in the show. We'd have been happy to carbo-load with you.
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post #37 of 59
4/29/08 at 3:02pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by EdHocken View Post
Would there be CHUD associated panels? Would we have such things as "An evening with Moltisanti" and "LA chewers vs. NY Chewers"?
To steal from a local radio show, "Watch a Chewer chew."


There should also be an octagon for the convention.
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post #38 of 59
4/29/08 at 3:08pm
Good ideas Billy. We could also have a nominating convention for the CHUD man of the year set to the tone of political conventions of yore.

"THE LOS ANGELES DELEGATION NOMINATES...!
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post #39 of 59
4/29/08 at 3:25pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by billylove View Post
There should also be an octagon for the convention.
You really think we could get Paul Rudd to show up?
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post #40 of 59
4/29/08 at 3:40pm
If we saw this from a Baseball perspective, the Los Angeles squad has got a hell of a lineup with Devin and Beaks batting behind each other. The question is who's the cleanup hitter of the two?

Devin's a first baseman for sure though.
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post #41 of 59
4/29/08 at 3:41pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissZooey View Post
We were there. Were you? Had dinner at Tutto Pasta, ice cream at The Chocolate Shoppe, and took in the show. We'd have been happy to carbo-load with you.
Yeah, I was there with my date. We had dinner at Pizza di Roma, and then had a cone from Ben & Jerry's while waiting in line. I did leave a little early because the crowd where I was sitting was supremely pissing me off, and I was disappointed that there was no Neko Case. Still, Okkervil River was AMAZING, and worth the price of admission alone, and what I saw of the New Pornographers was really, REALLY good.

Anyway, sorry to derail the thread. Please continue.
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post #42 of 59
4/29/08 at 3:41pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by EdHocken View Post
Would there be CHUD associated panels? Would we have such things as "An evening with Moltisanti" and "LA chewers vs. NY Chewers"?
What would Devin do? He lives in LA, but he's a NYer born and bred!
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post #43 of 59
4/29/08 at 3:46pm
He was traded to LA. You get a First Round pick though.
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post #44 of 59
4/29/08 at 3:47pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by IggytheBorg View Post
I'm still not playing cards with you.
Can we play Rifts, then? I fucking love that game and we've been trying, with no success, to get our game going after our two friends broke up and skipped town.
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post #45 of 59
4/29/08 at 3:58pm
Here's the thing that's weird to me - I meet friends on a messageboard in RL, and my family and friends act like I'm off to get chopped up by axe murderers who will then rape my corpse.

However, I tell these same people that I'm also on Match.com and OkCupid? And they're all for it. Apparently hanging out for a few beers with some folks you met from the internet is a no-no, but someone you could potentially wind up dating, having sex with, being in a relationship with, etc. is fine. And for the record, both of those things are fine with me, but I just don't understand the disconnect when I mention that to RL people who care about me.

I did have an anonymous screenname ages ago at another site where I met some of the folks, and it was weird hearing someone call me by a screenname. I had that anonymous screenname for about two seconds on here before I just decided to go with my real first name.
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post #46 of 59
4/29/08 at 8:31pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by LisaNY View Post
Here's the thing that's weird to me - I meet friends on a messageboard in RL, and my family and friends act like I'm off to get chopped up by axe murderers who will then rape my corpse.
Yeah, like Iggy's experience, my wife was all like "Call me if you wake up in a tub of ice... Do you even know his last name?"

I put some of her fears to rest when I told her that he was a fellow Creature-Corner contributor (we've both written some reviews), and she seemed OK then. We had a great time drinking beer, enjoying the nice FL evening air, and gabbed about college, jobs, horror movies, roll-playing games, etc.

I'd love to meet more Chewers (and watch some flicks with them). I'm disappointed I had to bail on hooking up with Alex R. this weekend (while he was on vacation with his lady in Orlando). Work's been demanding all my time (I worked 30 hours between Thurs & Fri of last week), and I've got the flu as a result. Ugh.

As I've been reminded more than once, I need to drop by chat more frequently.
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post #47 of 59
4/29/08 at 10:01pm
I just tell people I'm meeting "my readers". Cause it makes them chuckle.
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post #48 of 59
4/30/08 at 11:52am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alex Riviello View Post
I just tell people I'm meeting "my readers". Cause it makes them chuckle.
I might go with "the public", "my fans", or "the rabble", but that's awesome. Maintains a certain dignity.
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post #49 of 59
4/30/08 at 12:50pm
We should have a Chewer convention in Orlando. Cheap hotels and flights, plus theme parks and bars abound. But, perhaps the greatest reason to come to Orlando (besides the wicked convention center) - that would mean I don't have to go anywhere.
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post #50 of 59
4/30/08 at 12:51pm
Yeah, you and Dickson man. *Shakes fist*
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