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Favorite Futurama Quotes/Moments

post #1 of 160
Thread Starter 
I remember that The Simpsons had a thread like this and I wondered why Futurama did not. It has almost as many golden moments and judging from the avatars around here, it seems to be pretty popular.

So, these are two of mine from Less Than Hero:

Fry: I feel like I've been mauled by Jesus!

and

The scene where the New Justice Team is fighting the Zookeeper's minions, complete with the 60s Batman TV show graphics. Instead of "BAM!" or "POW!" when Bender is hit by a boxing kangaroo, his graphic is "01001001001"

Even after 5 years, that scene still makes me almost tear up in laughter.
post #2 of 160
didnt we have a futurama appreciation thread earlier?

Anyway, still love this show to death.

One of my all time favorite moments was in "Luck of the Fryish" when Fry and his bro are competing street dancers, and Fry yells to Noticeable F.A.T to "rewind"
post #3 of 160
So, so many lines, but I think one of my all-time faves is this:

Farnsworth (on the phone): Oh how awful. Did he at least die peacefully? [pause] To shreds you say, tsk tsk tsk. Well, how's his wife holding up? [pause] To shreds, you say.

I also love in the Bigfoot/human horn episode, Fry leans out of his tent at night and asks Bender if he's all right. Bender's head is acting as an electric fly killer.

Bender: Better than these gnats! [He zaps a few more and laughs.] That guy won't be goin' home to his kids.
post #4 of 160
From I Dated A Robot:

Fry: For one brief moment, I felt the heartbeat of creation, and it was one with my own.
Amy: Big deal.
Bender: (annoyed) We all feel like that all the time.

From A Head in the Polls:

Morbo: Morbo demands an answer to the following question. If you saw delicious candy in the hands of a small child, would you seize and consume it?
...
Nixon: Uh, well ah, the question is, uh, is vague. You don't say what kind of candy, whether anyone is watching, or uh... (ahem) At any rate, I certainly wouldn't harm the child. [Truthoscope goes off.]
post #5 of 160
Bender: Ahhh, what an awful dream. Ones and zeroes everywhere... and I thought I saw a two.
Fry: Don't worry, Bender: there's no such thing as two.

Fry: C'mon. C'mon. Hey, Leela, how about a kiss for good luck?
[Leela gives him a quick peck on the cheek]
Fry: [disappointed] I meant tongue luck.

[the professor has been "youthisized" to age 53]
Professor Hubert Farnsworth: Oh, now I'll need a fake ID to buy ultra-porn.
post #6 of 160
I'd be surprised if this is a thread that doesn't already exist. Anyway; I have much love for The Neutrals:

"All I know is that my gut says "maybe"."

"If I don't make it, tell my wife... hello."

Also, re: self-help books;

"It is true what they say: "Women are from Omicron Persei Seven, men are from Omicron Persei Nine.""
post #7 of 160
The eminently quotable Zapp Brannigan: "I find the most erotic part of a woman is the boobies."
post #8 of 160
Cubert Farnsworth: Haven't you ever seen a genius' wiener before?
Fry: Well, this one time at the park.
post #9 of 160
"I'll never forget you, Fry. MEMORY DELETED."

"Kittens give Morbo gas."

I'll be back later with more. This show's too good.
post #10 of 160
The Beast With a Billion Backs is still coming out June 24th, right? Do the remaining two movies have dates set for them?
post #11 of 160
Good news! It's a suppository!
post #12 of 160
Race Track Announcer: And the winner is [I forgot the horse's name], in a quantum finish!
Prof. Farnsworth: No Fair! You changed the outcome by measuring it!
post #13 of 160
Don't let the door hit your ass on the way out, dearies. BECAUSE I DON'T WANT ASSPRINTS ON MY NEW DOOR!
post #14 of 160
Thread Starter 
From 'War is the H-Word'

Zapp Branigan: We know nothing of their language, their history or what they look like. But we can assume this: they stand for everything we don't stand for. Also, they told me that you guys look like dorks!
Bender: THEY LOOK LIKE DORKS!!!! (Shakes fist)

and:
Branigan: While others were fighting and dying pointlessly, he was lying in a hole , wallowing in a pool of his own cowardice.
Fry: That wasn't cowardice!

as well as:

Branigan: Soon you will all be fighting for your planet. Many of you will be dying for your planet. A few of you will be forced through a fine mesh screen for your planet. They will be the luckiest of them all.

and don't forget:

Brainball: The elders tell of a young ball much like you. He bounced three meters into the air, then he bounced 1.8 meters in the air, then he bounced FOUR meters in the air. Do I make myself clear?!
Kissinger: Mr. Ambassador, our people tell the same story (oy)
Bender: THESE BALLS ARE MAKING ME TESTY!

finally, the New New York Post headline:

WAR OVER!
Balls Thoroughly Licked

Sorry for bogarting that episode.
post #15 of 160
From "Crimes of the Hot":
Anchorwoman: I'm sure those windmills will keep them cool.
Morbo: WINDMILLS DO NOT WORK THAT WAY. GOODNIGHT!

From "How Hermes Requisitioned His Groove Back":
(Hermes is about to jump off the building)
Bender: Do a flip!

Those two never fail to make me laugh, no matter how many times I see the episode.
post #16 of 160
"9, 10, a big fat head. The name's Bender."
post #17 of 160
If we hit that bullseye, the rest of the dominoes should fall like a house of cards. Checkmate.
post #18 of 160
"Amy...console the widow Pac-Man."

"This must have something to do with the secret ingredient!"
"What if the secret ingredient is...people?!"
"Oh, there's already a soda like that. Soylent Cola."
"Oh, how is it?"
"It varies from person to person."

"Please Don-Bot! Look into your hard drive and open your mercy file!"
"File not found."
post #19 of 160
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bees?! View Post
If we hit that bullseye, the rest of the dominoes should fall like a house of cards. Checkmate.
This is the Futurama equivalent of the "Forget it Marge, its Chinatown" speech. And I love them both.
post #20 of 160
I don't remember the name of the episode, but it's the one with the bizarro bender and the tiara for the beauty pagaent.

Farnsworth: "It's worth over $50,000."
Fry: "How much more?"
Farnsworth: "$100,000"

I don't know why, that little bit of humor always kind of summed up what the show was about. Anytime I tried to explain to someone why they should watch, I quoted that scene. If they didn't think it was funny, they probably wouldn't like the show.
post #21 of 160
Heh, Flexo. He is The Lesser of Two Evils.
post #22 of 160
You could make an entire quote thread just from Prof. Farnsworth's "Good news everyone!" lines.

"Good news, everyone! I've taught the toaster to feel love."
post #23 of 160
Farnsworth: Who are those horrible little men over there?
Wonka Slug: Them? They're Gunka-Lunkas!
Farnsworth: Tell them I hate them.

Gunka-Lunkas:
Gunka Lunka Gunka Lingredient!
You shouldn't ask about the secret ingredient!
post #24 of 160
"Roooobot house!!!" always makes me laugh for some reason.

"Good news everyone I'm still technically alive!"

"Kiff tell the men I have made it with a woman!"
post #25 of 160
Morbo: "Windmills do not work that way!!!"
post #26 of 160
FRY: "I'm not a robot like you. I don't like having discs crammed into me ... unless they're Oreos ... and then only in the mouth."
post #27 of 160
"Stop exploding you cowards!!"

and

Fry, "I've got an idea..."

Leela interrupting, "I've got a better idea"
post #28 of 160
"Look I barely exploded at all!"
"We can control that with medication."
post #29 of 160
Fry: Hey wait, I’m having one of those things. You know. A headache with pictures.
Leela: An idea?


Bender: Fry crack corn, and I don't care,
Leela crack corn, I still don't care,
Bender crack corn cause he is great....
Take that you stupid corn.


And the perfect retort to any stupid question:
Bender: Is the Space Pope reptilian?

Yes. Yes he is.
post #30 of 160
Quote:
Originally Posted by Arjen Rudd View Post
Farnsworth: Who are those horrible little men over there?
Wonka Slug: Them? They're Gunka-Lunkas!
Farnsworth: Tell them I hate them.
Not to be a tool, but I believe they're Gronka Lonkas...
post #31 of 160
"Accusing gentle Bender of a misdeed? That's the final straw!!"
post #32 of 160
"Nixon's not bringing the smokes!" - Bender

"Cool your jowels, Nixon!"

Nixon howling out of nowhere.
post #33 of 160
Leela: Bender, we're trying our best.
Bender: Your best is an idiot!
post #34 of 160
Bender-"you robbed the same bank twice?"

Roberto-"Yeah the first time was to case the joint, ya know, rob it a little."

Also from that episode

Roberto-" Hey Red, mind if I practice my stabbin motions? HIYA YA!
post #35 of 160
Dr. Zoidberg is possibly my favourite character from the show

[At the horse races]
Hermes: Come on, baby needs a new pair of shoes.
Dr. Zoidberg: The hell with your spoiled baby, I need those shoes!
post #36 of 160
Fry: But Bender, think of the senoritas!
Bender: Vamanos!
post #37 of 160
Anecdote accepted, witty retort not found.
post #38 of 160
"How's the family, Morbo?"

"BELLIGERENT AND NUMEROUS!"

Bees stole my favorite Brannigan quote, but I also love what he says when they are fighting against the fleet from Omicron Perseii 8 and losing...

"Stop exploding you cowards!"
post #39 of 160
"I don't regret this, but I both rue and lament it."

"I have a very sexy learning disability. Kiff! What do we call it?"
"[sigh]..... sexlexia."
post #40 of 160
"First Bender, then Flexo, then Fry"

That's a well-written gag if ever I saw one.
post #41 of 160
That's not an astronaut, it's a T.V. comedian! And he was just using space travel as a metaphor for beating his wife.
post #42 of 160
Thread Starter 
Amazon Woman: We sentence them to death ...
Fry, Brannigan and Kif: GASP!
Amazon Woman: ... by SNUSNU!
Kif: GASP!
Brannigan: What are you, gay?

and:

Soilent Green: Now with more girls.
post #43 of 160
Always my favorite:

"They're like sex, but I'm having them!"

Fry, "The Problem with Popplers
post #44 of 160
"You still have Zoidberg...

YOU ALL STILL HAVE ZOIDBERG!"

Also, "With my last breath I curse Zoidberg!"
post #45 of 160
I love how Zoidberg does the Curly style "Woo Woo Woo" when he runs

also a running phrase with a friend of mine.

"It's time to knuckle under and really lick boot."
post #46 of 160
Fry: Wow! A superpowers drug you can just rub onto your skin? You'd think it would be something you'd have to freebase.

Zoidberg is great, this one of my favorites of his even he's technically in it, hearing him faintly scream out "screw you" cracks me up every time.

Leela: Super strength?
[Both smash heavy objects]
Fry: Yep.
Leela: Lickity speed?
[Both race across the room instantaneously]
Fry: Check.
Leela: Ability to command the loyalty of sea creatures?
Fry: Hey, Zoidberg, get in here!
Dr. Zoidberg: Screw you!
Leela: Ain't got that.
Fry: Nope.
post #47 of 160
Quote:
Originally Posted by TURBO-1984 View Post
Amazon Woman: We sentence them to death ...
Fry, Brannigan and Kif: GASP!
Amazon Woman: ... by SNUSNU!
Kif: GASP!
Brannigan: What are you, gay?
Brannigan: The spirit is willing but the flesh is spongy and bruised.
post #48 of 160
"Did you explain the importance of fundamentals!?"
post #49 of 160
My favorite is an oldie but a goodie:

[Leela just jumped into the river of Slurm to rescue Fry from drowning and surfaces with him. Bender surfaces with them whistling]
Leela: Bender, why did you jump in?
Bender: Everybody was doing it... I just wanted to be popular

I love using that in daily conversation
post #50 of 160
Quote:
Originally Posted by EdHocken View Post
I love how Zoidberg does the Curly style "Woo Woo Woo" when he runs
I haven't seen too many Futurama episodes but the one bit that stands out to me is in the episode where Zoidberg is dressed as Jesus (Halloween episode maybe?). There's some disaster going on and a trapped guy calls out the Zoidberg Jesus, "Help me!" Zoidberg says, "Sorry, Jesus helps those who help themselves", and runs away. That killed me.
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