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A Farewell of Sorts

post #1 of 115
Thread Starter 
Dearest friends and colleagues,

I don't know how to do this delicately, so I'll just blurt it out (even though the news has probably wended its way through the grapevine by now): this is my last week with CHUD. Beginning June 16th, I will return to my online mothership, AICN.

Aside from becoming a working (i.e. paid) screenwriter, this was probably the only offer that could've lured me away from CHUD. When I left AICN in 2005, I did so only because I was flat broke and had the opportunity to start a website with some solid financial backing - thus began my misadventures with Collider.com (a site that is finally beginning to flourish thanks to the ceaseless chutzpah of Steve "Frosty" Weintraub - we should all work as hard as this guy). I jumped that ship back in 2006, figuring I was done with the online entertainment thang. But then the illustrious Nick Nunziata came calling with an offer I couldn't refuse.

And what a year (and change) it's been! I got to participate in several lists (no one does 'em better than CHUD), interview a personal hero (Pete Seeger) and shoot my mouth off with complete impunity. Most importantly, after years of cluttering its message boards with utter inanity, I finally got to write for CHUD!

I've never worked with a more literate and talented group of writers in my life. Everyone complements each other so brilliantly: from Nick's caustic wit to Russ's astute deconstructions (go back and read his Toronto '07 reviews, which were more lucid and provocative than those cranked out by the print "elite") to the wonderful, horrible passion of Mr. Devin Faraci (best entertainment writer going and way overdue for a permanent Drudge link)... goddamn, I was spoiled.

Though I'll be off taking it in the shorts daily from my beloved talkbackers (polish off those "evolving sensibility of Michael Bay" cracks, boys!), I'll still drop in on the best message boards anywheres to indulge in some friendly chit-chat with all y'all. CHUD was always my online home away from home. That will never change.

Much gratitude is due Jeremy G. Butler for putting art to my nonsense, Eileen for her pluck, Alex Rivello for his terrific MCP/CC contributions, the DVD Review staff for their exhaustive coverage of often exhausting releases, and my good friend Andre Dellamorte for making art out of the least artful aspect of our godforsaken business. I'm sure I'm forgetting many someones. Please know that you are admired by a forgetful jackass.

And the readers. Thanks for loving me up and calling me on my shit. You guys are the reason we do what we do.

See you over at the friendly competition, and, of course, right here on the boards.

Dont cry baby. Knew this was one way ticket, but you know I had to come. Love you wife...


Jeremy Smith
post #2 of 115
I'm gonna miss reading your articles. You did some damn great work while here.
post #3 of 115
Have fun in that "abyss."
post #4 of 115
Well, it's been great to read your work, which will be dearly missed, but I'll try to catch some of your written greatness on AICN from times to times and see where your scripts takes you.

Have fun. And hopefully, we'll still see you on the boards.
post #5 of 115
Oh shit.

Your frontpage stuff will be missed, and this means I have to start visiting AICN more.
post #6 of 115
Damn, sir. I will miss your articles. Best of luck in all your future endeavours.
post #7 of 115
Damn it, Jeremy!

Well, best of luck to you. I hope you'll still hang out at the next LA Chewer gathering when Nick's in town.
post #8 of 115
So long, Beaks, and thanks for your hard work. You'll be missed.
post #9 of 115
I really don't like visiting AICN, but I enjoyed your work here on CHUD.

Good luck and keep following your dream. It's the only thing I will ever ask you to do.
post #10 of 115
Damn Beaks. You will be sorely, sorely missed.

Good luck in your endeavors. I might have to go back to reading AICN more often now.

You are a brilliant writer. I have no doubt you will be able to become a working screenwriter soon.
post #11 of 115
Well, crap. Do I really have to dust off that bookmark? Your stuff's just the ginchiest, Jeremy, so I probably will. Hope whatever it is that Harry has photos of you doing was worth it at the time.
post #12 of 115
So if AICN is the deep dark depths where you will discover a eery and beautiful alien civilization, which CHUD poster was the crazy Michael Biehn son of a bitch that tried to blow your shit up with a nuclear warhead?
post #13 of 115
Hamburgers. All the best over there. I absolutely enjoyed your writing and you really added a lot to the writing stuff over here.

Now I have a reason to visit AICN once in a while I guess. But that is a price I am willing to pay.

Hope to hear from you with some enlightment for us on the boars sometimes.
post #14 of 115
The charitable part of me says, "Good luck, Beaks. Continue being amazing at AICN", but the louder part says, "This is fucking bullshit!"

Who else will sit and defend 13 GOING ON 30 with me?
post #15 of 115
Noooooooooooo! AICN doesn't deserve you*!

In all seriousness, best of luck. You've done a man's job, sir.


*But they do, in fact, need you more(from a writing quality perspective). Moriarty's stuff is just about all I can be bothered to read now. Vern too, occasionally.
post #16 of 115
Jeremy, I'll be seeing you over at AICN. I may be doing some more writing there myself within the next few weeks.
post #17 of 115
Sad news indeed. Really been nice reading your work on the main page. I have my gripes with AICN but I'm a sucker for Vern's stuff and I guess now I'll be clicking over from time to time to see your contributions.
post #18 of 115
Good Luck!

I wonder if there's a possibility that you will be a guest participant on some future CHUD lists?
post #19 of 115
Adios Smith, it was cool meeting you at the Hollywood drink up. Make sure to get out there and not take shit from ChickenGeorgeVII.
post #20 of 115
Yeah, best of luck.

I've always enjoyed your articles. Though it does stink that we won't be seeing that proposed "The Worst Sex Scenes in the History of Film" list.
post #21 of 115
Aw...this kinda sucks. I'm getting all verklempt over here. Looks like I may have to start visiting AICN again. I guess it's not that bad, so long as you don't read the talkbacks.

Later, Beaks. We'll miss you.
post #22 of 115
You know, Jeremy, the first review of yours I remember reading was your glowing AICN FREDDY VS JASON piece. It was then I knew I could always trust your writing.

God speed, Stanley Goodspeed.
post #23 of 115
Actually reading all the words in an AICN news article/review is going to be a weird feeling!
post #24 of 115
Missed, you will be.
post #25 of 115
While I'm sad you won't be collaborating with the CHUD folks any longer, I'm just happy I'll get to keep reading your work in one form or another.

I just want to thank you, as well, Beaks. Like the rest of the CHUD crew, your writing has been exceptional. I'm an aspiring writer myself and your work in particular has played a significant role in shaping how I go about analyzing and writing about film. Best of luck to you at AICN and wherever you might end up after that.
post #26 of 115
Of all the souls I've encountered in my travels, yours was the most....likely to make me read AICN regularly again.

Good luck Beaks.
post #27 of 115
Clarence Beaks, Enjoy your return to your...Mother Ship and I hope you enjoy smooth sailing.
post #28 of 115
Best of Luck Beaks, you are a fantastic and classy writer. It really is a shame you won't be part of the Chud Team anymore. I too now have a reason to read AICN again.
post #29 of 115
Yeah, that really sucks. I love/loved your writing for the site, Beaks. I'll be looking for your stuff over on AICN. Good luck with the move, sir.
post #30 of 115
I wish you all the best, Beaks and don't take this the wrong way, but you're way too talented to be writing for AICN. Actually, that seems to be the site's style: brilliant writers, horrible readers.
post #31 of 115
No one will ever love you like we did. You'll rue the day you left us!

Best wishes, Beaks.
post #32 of 115
Good Luck!
post #33 of 115
In recent months, you have genuinely (this is no mere lip-service) been the most consistently enjoyable writer for me, perhaps because our opinions are like a Venn diagram where a distant idea meets cohesion and good writing. Anyway, thank you for your thoughtful and entertaining writing and all the best. It seems I'm the only chewer who still goes over to AICN pretty much every day (they are the reason I found CHUD in the first place), so I know I'll be seeing your words again.
post #34 of 115
Don't let the screen door hit you in the ass, traitor!

Just kidding, of course. Your wit will be sorely missed, as everyone has said.
post #35 of 115
Curse your oily hide! Uhhh-- I mean.. damn it! Your contributions to the site will be sorely missed; you've consistantly been the cream of the crop for writing talent here or anywhere, but wish you all the best with the screenwriting and return to AICN.

If you could somehow write a major plot device that hinges around someone visiting chud.com into your first big script, that would attone for this sin. Actually, it would probably cause an influx of morons, but I'm sure Nick could use the extra dough!

I'm rambling here.. best wishes and visit back often!
post #36 of 115
Best of luck. I'll miss both your articles and your Cavs fannery.
post #37 of 115
Best of luck, CB! Loved your articles, and it was great talking with you briefly at the L.A./Nunz get-together. Now go class up that Knowles house!
post #38 of 115
I believe the term I'm looking for is "crappitypoop." Your work on the front page has been outstanding, and I'm glad to hear you'll be hanging around the boards. It's a big Internet, and there's room for CHUD and AICN. Best of luck to you.
post #39 of 115
Sorry to see you go, good sir. You are a writer of the quality the rest of can only aspire to. It was good to meet you at the Nick-in-town-thing. Best regards and good luck.
post #40 of 115
Good luck, sir. You're truly the epitome of what's good about internet film criticism. Nothing but best wishes.
post #41 of 115
Ah, poopie. We're losing another good'un.

Godspeed and the best of luck to ye, Jeremy!
post #42 of 115


Good luck man, and stay safe. I mean that. Take no chances!
post #43 of 115
Aww, dammit, Beaks! I'm happy for you, but we're going to miss the hell out of you. Good luck though, and please make sure to stop by the boards, don't disappear on us completely.
post #44 of 115
Best of luck Jeremy and I will miss your contributions on the main page.
post #45 of 115
Jeez, Beaks - you scared me for a minute there. You're not giving up writing, just going to another venue. I now have two reasons to visit AICN, and they're lucky to have you and Moriarty.
post #46 of 115
Say it Ain'tICN so!

I've been waiting for Vol 3. of The Beaks Canon for 9 months!
post #47 of 115
Sadness.
post #48 of 115
God. Damnit.
post #49 of 115
"I think I speak for us all when I say, 'Congratulations, you lucky son of a bitch.'"
post #50 of 115
So so long, brother. You take it easy. You're home free.
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