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Extasy and Cialis or Viagra????

post #1 of 82
7/3/08 at 7:25pm
Thread Starter 
eat shit
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post #2 of 82
7/3/08 at 7:40pm
Forget the male enhancement pills and eat a watermelon.
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post #3 of 82
7/3/08 at 7:43pm
You could ,of course, say fooey to all that, castrate yourself, and therefore spare the world the misery of seeing your gene pool continue on.
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post #4 of 82
7/3/08 at 7:44pm
Fuckin' go for it man. Only live once. But, be a real man and take all the pills so you have a raging boner and you're tripping balls and your girl is still sober. That would fix nothing, but it would make a very funny story.
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post #5 of 82
7/3/08 at 7:44pm
What he said.

Also, I never was a fan of X. Just not my thing. And mixing pharmaceuticals is never a good idea. Everybody is different though.
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post #6 of 82
7/3/08 at 7:45pm
Who calls it X? Is this a british drug movie from the 90s?

I bet you smoke 'ganja.'
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post #7 of 82
7/3/08 at 7:51pm
Is this post for real? I can't believe you are so open about your erectile dysfunction problem. Wow!
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post #8 of 82
7/3/08 at 8:28pm
Thread Starter 
...
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post #9 of 82
7/3/08 at 8:31pm
Hahaha. Better hope it works, or your girl will start looking other places for her lovin'.
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post #10 of 82
7/3/08 at 8:32pm
If you do it, take aspirin. Mainly, because you're probably going to take too much and you'll need the aspirin or Ibuprofen to help with blood flow.
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post #11 of 82
7/3/08 at 8:35pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by DarthSidious View Post
Who said I had a problem? This is just an experiment for some fun. Whats wrong with you people.
You said it yourself "My girl and I have had some problems", you make it sound like you just can't get it up.

Print, cut this out and put it over your girlfriends face;


For maximum effect, play some Ron Paul speech or televised debate in the background.
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post #12 of 82
7/3/08 at 8:45pm
I can see it now;


"Oooooh, baby, gonna establish a gold currency aren't ya?"
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post #13 of 82
7/3/08 at 9:21pm
Thread Starter 
...
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post #14 of 82
7/3/08 at 9:29pm
Grapefruit! Allen wrench, the CD burner frostbites my gigolo. The congee is sandpaper jackknife. Acorn flour is the only method.
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post #15 of 82
7/3/08 at 9:43pm
First person to find a news article in the next few days which details the death of some doof who took too many pills so he could get an erection for his imaginary girlfriend wins my everlasting love.
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post #16 of 82
7/3/08 at 10:01pm
American dies of apparent generic Viagra overdose in bar girl romp.

Given time, I could easily find a ton of these.

Now tell me your cat's name.

edit - I just searched PubMed ("viagra AND death") and found that medical professionals seem to think that the stuff won't kill you by itself. If you're in bad shape to begin with, though... In short, if it goes, boys, please just let it go.
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post #17 of 82
7/3/08 at 10:07pm
worst meltdown ever
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post #18 of 82
7/3/08 at 10:10pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissZooey View Post
American dies of apparent generic Viagra overdose in bar girl romp.

Given time, I could easily find a ton of these.

Now tell me your cat's name.

edit - I just searched PubMed ("viagra AND death") and found that medical professionals seem to think that the stuff won't kill you by itself. If you're in bad shape to begin with, though... In short, if it goes, boys, please just let it go.
"next few days"! You lose! I have to at least be able to imagine that Sidious has removed himself from this mortal coil to crack a grin. The cat remains anonymous.
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post #19 of 82
7/3/08 at 10:13pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by DarthSidious View Post
I dont even care anymore about that, economic collapse is right around the corner and I hope all your families fuckin starve to death while I scream FUCK YOU!
Go fuck yourself!

But before you do remember that fucking yourself is not for everyone. Tell your doctor about your medical conditions and all medications, and ask if you're healthy enough to fuck yourself. Don't fuck yourself if you take nitrates, often prescribed for chest pain, as this may cause a sudden, unsafe drop in blood pressure. Don't drink alcohol in excess (to a level of intoxication) while fucking yourself, as this may increase your chances of getting dizzy or lowering your blood pressure. Some side effects of fucking yourself include headache and upset stomach. Backaches and muscle aches were also reported, sometimes with delayed onset. Sudden loss or decrease in hearing, sometimes with ringing in the ears and dizziness, has been reported in rare instances in men who fuck themselves. It is not possible to determine whether these events are related directly to fucking yourself, to other diseases or medications, to other factors, or to a combination of factors. If you experience these symptoms, stop fucking yourself and contact a doctor right away.
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post #20 of 82
7/3/08 at 10:14pm
Dude, relax, I wasn't trying to be funny when I suggested the watermelon.
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post #21 of 82
7/3/08 at 10:14pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tieman
worst meltdown ever
No kidding. Didn't go on nearly long enough.

Speaking of which...

I just finished reading the entertaining, informative, and funny Bonk: The Curious Coupling of Science and Sex by Mary Roach. In it, on page 285 to be specific, she cites a study that suggests that the average time between penetration and ejaculation for a human male is two minutes. Two minutes. I've been boggled by this number since I read it about three days ago. That can't possibly be right, can it? I mean, I'm not going to take a survey or anything, but... two minutes? That's it? How many two pump chumps are running around to compensate for what Sting alone does that to that average?

edit - MOLT! [] [] [] []
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post #22 of 82
7/3/08 at 10:35pm
Worst Meltdown ever indeed, but we can still save this thread.
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post #23 of 82
7/3/08 at 10:36pm
How, Dr. Tati, how?!
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post #24 of 82
7/3/08 at 10:41pm
This could be the thread where each of us guys swears to pick up that average... would that do it?
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post #25 of 82
7/3/08 at 11:05pm
What time of the year was that poll taken, Zooey? If it was around sweeps week I think we found our answer: commercial breaks + thirty second clean-up.
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post #26 of 82
7/3/08 at 11:13pm
Priapism Takes a Penis

Quote:
1988 Darwin Award Nominee
Confirmed True by Darwin

Doctors warn of a dangerous new method of cocaine abuse: injecting the drug directly into the urinary tract. Physicians from New York Hospital-Cornell Medical Center reported the case of a 34-year-old man who suffered severe bleeding under the skin after pumping cocaine into his urethra. It led to complications that destroyed his penis, nine fingers, and parts of his legs. "They fill an eye dropper or a syringe with a cocaine solution and inject it into the penis," said Dr. Samuel Perry, a professor of clinical psychiatry.

The man had injected cocaine before intercourse in an effort to enhance sexual performance. He was admitted to the hospital because his penis had remained erect for three days, resulting in a painful inability to urinate. The medical term for a prolonged erection is "priapism." On his third day in the hospital, the man's erection suddenly subsided. Over the next 12 hours, blood leaked into the tissues of his feet, hands, genitals, back and chest. Blood coagulation caused tissues to die over large areas of the patient's body, and he was transferred to the burn unit of New York Hospital-Cornell Medical Center.

Doctors there were forced to amputate the man's legs above the knee and all but one of his fingers to stop the spread of gangrene. The patient's penis fell off by itself. The man is currently recovering in a rehabilitation facility.

Men who inject cocaine into the penis report that it gives them a sexual high. Drug abuse treatment experts have previously reported external use of cocaine as a sexual stimulant. Cocaine powder is rubbed onto the surface of the genital organs by both men and women in an effort to halt premature ejacuation or improve sexual sensations.

"We report this case to alert clinicians to this new method of cocaine abuse and to describe its rare and previously unreported complications," the doctors concluded.
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post #27 of 82
7/3/08 at 11:20pm
This thread has made me proud of CHUD again. Come on into the bedroom, baby, and get off the couch. I'll even go ATM for you.
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post #28 of 82
7/4/08 at 12:22am
Your avatar makes that statement so much funnier.
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post #29 of 82
7/4/08 at 12:49am
Sidious, we love you! Seriously, somewhere Duke Fleed is pretending you are Optimus Prime and banging you as we speak. In a good way.

And I really hope you stick to the Ron Paul guns. I just have this great impression of 60 years from now an 85 year old crazy person flinging poo at his orderlies screaming, "Paul was right and we warned you fuckers!" Stay strong brother!
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post #30 of 82
7/4/08 at 1:24am
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post #31 of 82
7/4/08 at 2:32am
There's not enough rep in the world for that one, El Cap. Does the article go on or is the cut-off portion gibberish?
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post #32 of 82
7/4/08 at 9:21am
ElCapitain for the save!

Seriously, what the fuck is this thread again? Darth should just take all 3 at the same time with a 6-pack of Redbull and he'll be good to go with his watermelon.
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post #33 of 82
7/4/08 at 9:46am
This thread just makes me hungry for watermelon.

It looks so damned refreshing!
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post #34 of 82
7/4/08 at 10:28am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mattimus View Post
There's not enough rep in the world for that one, El Cap. Does the article go on or is the cut-off portion gibberish?
The article was just a bit longer, but I liked where it was cut off with the "we love you" quote. The stuff on the right is pre-canned gibberish. You can create your own articles with this generator, it's pretty cool.

http://www.fodey.com/generators/newspaper/snippet.asp
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post #35 of 82
7/4/08 at 12:05pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by nekkerbee View Post
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post #36 of 82
7/4/08 at 12:54pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissZooey View Post
I just finished reading the entertaining, informative, and funny Bonk: The Curious Coupling of Science and Sex by Mary Roach. In it, on page 285 to be specific, she cites a study that suggests that the average time between penetration and ejaculation for a human male is two minutes. Two minutes.
Ha! I just picked up Spook! and Stiff! by the same author. Great stuff.
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post #37 of 82
7/4/08 at 1:44pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissZooey View Post
...the average time between penetration and ejaculation for a human male is two minutes. Two minutes. I've been boggled by this number since I read it about three days ago. That can't possibly be right, can it? I mean, I'm not going to take a survey or anything, but... two minutes? That's it? How many two pump chumps are running around to compensate for what Sting alone does that to that average?
In my (nearly worthless anecdotal) experience, some women would HATE fucking Sting.

I'm like the opposite of the two pump chump guys, and suffer for it...
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post #38 of 82
7/4/08 at 7:55pm
Damn, I missed the actual meltdown before he went in and edited them all!

El Cap, that was brilliant. Millions of green boxes for you.
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post #39 of 82
7/4/08 at 8:02pm
Shouldn't editing all of your posts away be a ban-able offense? I mean, that's why we lost the edit feature in the first place, right? He already said he was gonna leave and, with any luck, is in an MDMA-induced coma right now, so ban the turd.
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post #40 of 82
7/4/08 at 8:56pm
Can you blame the guy? I would have edited away posts admitting to erectile dysfunction in a global public forum as well.

We already have the best meltdown bit, which he can never erase;

Quote:
Originally Posted by DarthSidious
I dont even care anymore about that, economic collapse is right around the corner and I hope all your families fuckin starve to death while I scream FUCK YOU!
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post #41 of 82
7/4/08 at 9:01pm
Google Cache to the rescue!


DarthSidious
Registered User
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 418


Extasy and Cialis or Viagra????
Ok I just got a hold of 1 cialis, 1 viagra and 2 extasy pills.

My girl and I have had some problems with stress and all that and wanted to try X together to relax and I wanted to take a cialis one day before so it will be in my system and be with her the next night while on X. Have any of you done this or heard of anyone doing this. I know people mix X and viagra all the time but is cialis safe?

I've never done X before or any drugs as a matter of fact but I have taken a cialis before with no side effects at all.
__________________
I am the darkside!
Last edited by DarthSidious : Today at 07:32 PM.
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post #42 of 82
7/4/08 at 9:02pm
Google Cache to the rescue!

Today, 08:21 PM
DarthSidious
Registered User
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 419



You know what, fuck you people, Im leaving these forums. I see way to many threads where people try to be serious for a second and you people act like morons. You're still stuck on Ron Paul and still till this day cant see he was right about everything he said. I dont even care anymore about that, economic collapse is right around the corner and I hope all your families fuckin starve to death while I scream FUCK YOU!
__________________
I am the darkside!
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post #43 of 82
7/4/08 at 9:18pm
I love Google cache.
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post #44 of 82
7/5/08 at 12:50am
Excellent work, Cap! Meltdown accomplished.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ElCapitanAmerica View Post
Can you blame the guy? I would have edited away posts admitting to erectile dysfunction in a global public forum as well.
OR... he could have, y'know, not posted that little tidbit on a public forum to begin with. Just a thought.
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post #45 of 82
7/5/08 at 7:22am
Bingo!
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post #46 of 82
7/5/08 at 11:12am
The mere mental image of some dry-mouthed doofus tripping balls with a raging erection while rubbing a comforter and yelling "OH GOD THIS FEELS LIKE TECHNICOLOR BANANAS" in order to achieve orgasm made my day for like the second day in a row.
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post #47 of 82
7/5/08 at 8:22pm
Forget drugs of any kind. Just stare at this photo for a couple of minutes. If you can't get a hard-on then, well, there's no hope for you.


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post #48 of 82
7/5/08 at 8:35pm
Ok, I know I'm going to get the shithammer for this, but here goes...Who is that, bark?
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post #49 of 82
7/5/08 at 8:44pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by eatatjoes View Post
Ok, I know I'm going to get the shithammer for this, but here goes...Who is that, bark?
Why that's Carla Gugino. I stole the photo from the "Rose McGowan's Available" thread. She has quite the following around here.
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post #50 of 82
7/5/08 at 8:45pm
Carla Gugino. And yeah, you are on notice Mr.!
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