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mutant chronicles

post #1 of 28
7/13/08 at 2:24pm
Thread Starter 
today i watched the mutant chronicles, this was a film i had been looking forward to seeing a lot, given the cast of excellent actors. i would have to say it would be in my top 5 of worst films ever seen. i found i had to force myself to watch this film. i'm just glad i didn't pay to watch the film.
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post #2 of 28
7/13/08 at 2:30pm
Not familiar with this. Is it a film?
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post #3 of 28
7/13/08 at 2:37pm
It is.
And apparently it has leaked in a rough cut. Wasn´t that supposed to kind of premier on Comic-Con?
The word on the internets is nothing short of venom though.
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post #4 of 28
4/23/09 at 4:27pm
Watched part of this on HDNet Movies last night ... it's pretty crummy. I'll still probably give the rest of it a shot tonight though just to see exactly how bad it is.
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post #5 of 28
4/23/09 at 4:51pm
That's unfortunate. I was quite looking forward to this one - still giving it a rental when I can though.
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post #6 of 28
4/23/09 at 8:12pm
Yeah, I've been intrigued by the general hopefulness & positivity Alex has had about it in his articles, since I've read for months now that it is nothing short of vile garbage.
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post #7 of 28
4/23/09 at 10:25pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by dontEATnachos View Post
Watched part of this on HDNet Movies last night ... it's pretty crummy. I'll still probably give the rest of it a shot tonight though just to see exactly how bad it is.
I saw it in HDNET too. Didn't dig it at all. I really didn't like the look of the film, it just turns me off. It's the reason I couldn't get into Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow. It just would take me out of it. I'm a fan of Thomas Jane, so I sat throught it all, but I didn't like it.
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post #8 of 28
4/24/09 at 1:42am
Just got done watching the second half of it ... didn't really get any better. I love how they kill characters off who've done nothing but be annoying for 5 minutes of screen time and they expect me the viewer to care.

And I don't have a huge problem with the look except that it was always difficult to tell what was going on and the world never really felt like it had an understandable geometry ... I was just often confused about the actual layout the space they were in.

I'd also like to point out how painfully easy it was for them to actually get to where they needed to go. I mean, if it weren't for how idiotic the whole squad was it would have taken them maybe 10 minutes. I don't understand why no one else could manage to do it.
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post #9 of 28
4/25/09 at 9:17am
It's not really the sort of movie you can take seriously. But the cast is fun, there's a pretty solid tagline, and Perlman's accent is awesome. At least a rental if you have a taste for B-movies, but the crowd I watched it in the theatre with had a terrific time.
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post #10 of 28
4/25/09 at 10:27am
I have it here in front of me. I shall watch it this evening with a friend.

Nachos' glowing review has me looking forward to this one.
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post #11 of 28
4/25/09 at 11:33am
Yeah, I mean I really knew nothing about it while I was scrolling through upcoming movies on my TiVo and saw the cast and hoped for something slightly above 'B-action' ... maybe "B+action"?

I don't mind watching generic sci-fi or action movies but this one was just kind of plodding and filled with annoying characters.
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post #12 of 28
4/25/09 at 1:33pm
You can tell me "I told you so" after I watch it!
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post #13 of 28
4/25/09 at 6:25pm
Oh dear.
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post #14 of 28
4/25/09 at 6:27pm
That seems like an appropriate response to the film.
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post #15 of 28
4/25/09 at 6:54pm
Yeah, but I mean - seriously?
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post #16 of 28
4/28/09 at 3:39pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bees?! View Post
Oh dear.
Best Chud review ever.
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post #17 of 28
4/28/09 at 4:13pm
Have you had a chance to see it yet? Do not pay money for the experience.
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post #18 of 28
4/28/09 at 5:02pm
No, I haven't had the pleasure. Maybe if it gets thrown in the pile of Netflix instant watch titles I'll give it a few minutes.
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post #19 of 28
4/28/09 at 5:10pm
Don't.

I'd highly recommend you watch some good porn instead. Hell, bad porn will suffice - the production values will be higher and you'll be more entertained.

I regret the experience of seeing this film.
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post #20 of 28
4/28/09 at 11:53pm
It's playing on exactly two screens in the United States, so like an idiot, I saw that as a challenge rather than a warning.

"The Mutant Chronicles" is not the worst movie I've ever seen, but it definitely made an honest effort to be.

Still, the scene where Tom Jane falls into the mutant-making machine -- or whatever the fuck it is -- is unintentionally hilarious. Then he manages to escape before his transformation is complete and spends the remaining fifteen minutes of the movie a half-mutant, looking like someone you might see behind the counter at Hot Topic.
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post #21 of 28
4/29/09 at 5:23am
I struggled to get into the "so bad it's good" frame of mind. It played out like a fan project, with "cool ideas" that were simply painful to watch.

Since the most striking thing about the trailer was the visual style, i'm amazed that it was so shoddy looking. It's cheap and nasty.
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post #22 of 28
5/5/09 at 7:54am
I'm curious to know if anyone liked this. I liked the look of the trailer but I've not heard anything positive about it yet. Seeing it is definitely not a top priority.
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post #23 of 28
5/5/09 at 8:16am
It's essentially like one big fan-shot videogame cutscene.

Did you enjoy Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow?
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post #24 of 28
5/5/09 at 9:44am
That's one where I saw the trailer, wanted to see it, and never did. I wasn't sure why until I looked up when it came out - I was 14. I had no friends at that age and if my parents didn't want to see a movie, I didn't see it. I must remember to get hold of it at some point as it did look very pretty, if shallow.

One big fan-shot videogame cutscene does sound potentially fun, even if not exactly 'good', so I'm a little surprised at how negatively it's being received. I may have to get hold of it at some point when it's dirt cheap just out of curiosity.
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post #25 of 28
5/5/09 at 11:34am
My apologies, it wasn't my intent to make this sound better by labelling it as a "fan-shot videogame cutscene".

Do not put any money or time into this. It's shallow, lifeless, ugly and very dull.
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post #26 of 28
5/7/09 at 6:43pm
I disagree. It has its charms. But then, I love Hudson Hawk.
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post #27 of 28
5/7/09 at 7:01pm
Comparing Mutant Chronicles to Hudson Hawk is giving it too much credit. Even as it fails spectacularly Hudson Haw is far more entertaining than this could ever be.

What we get here is a supposed to be a steampunk-esque mutant monster/aliens movie with our rag-tag team of commandos trying to stop some destruction of the earth. An interesting idea on the surface.

The reality though is a small, inert, and incredibly dumb film. Good performances are not really gotten out of any of the characters. Thomas Jane is clearly hamming it up but it just doesn't really work around the poor performances of most everyone else involved and the generally retarded script.

Besides that though, the look of the film is just incredibly dull. Everything is washed out and brown. Worse though, it's done in such a way that it alternates between difficult to tell what's going on because it's too dark to it bein hard to tell what's going on because everything is too yellowish-gray.
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post #28 of 28
5/7/09 at 7:35pm
Hard to argue with any of your points, but I did enjoy some of the actors' work. Had worse times at better films.
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