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The Official Funny, Violent, or Bizarre News Story Thread - Page 3

post #101 of 1147
Wow. Ridiculous.
post #102 of 1147
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tieman View Post
Wow. Ridiculous.
Indeed. Although, to paraphrase Nat X, it's The Man's fault that the black jellybean is the world's worst tasting candy.
post #103 of 1147
Man finds Jesus in moth

I love CNN's conviction in the headline. Not "claims" to have seen the image, but he definitely found it!
post #104 of 1147
Thread Starter 
post #105 of 1147
Fucking camel spiders.



http://www.camelspiders.net/

Quote:
A camel spider is type of arachnid known as a solpugid, that can grow up to five inches long and run at up to 10mph.
post #106 of 1147
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worl...angladesh.html

Baby Born with two heads!
Dies 2 days later.
post #107 of 1147
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tati View Post
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worl...angladesh.html

Baby Born with two heads!
Dies 2 days later.
Immediately, idiots on message boards start questioning whether the two-faced baby is really dead.
post #108 of 1147
Whoa.

post #109 of 1147
post #110 of 1147
post #111 of 1147
What happened to that completely healthy two-headed girl that lived in the U.S.? She was on the cover of Life or Time or something.
post #112 of 1147
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tieman View Post
Fucking camel spiders.



http://www.camelspiders.net/

Fucking shit
that thing scares the fuck out of me. I raised my feet up off the floor when I saw the picture. Fuck you.

Fuck you. And fuck the god or natural forces that would create that monster. I'm upset now.
post #113 of 1147
Thread Starter 
post #114 of 1147

Cash-in-buttocks man in M25 ban

You don't know where that tenner may have been...


http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/7588217.stm
post #115 of 1147
Another reason America rocks, we cover our cash in cocaine, not feces.
post #116 of 1147
post #117 of 1147
Quote:
According to a report in the BBC, Spain has over 1 billion notes in circulation, of which an estimated 142 million have been used to snort cocaine.
That's incredible.
post #118 of 1147
I reckon that you have never been to Spain...
post #119 of 1147
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jan View Post
I reckon that you have never been to Spain...
Buying a ticket right now. Any idea where I can find the highest bill:snort ratio? Other than Ibiza?
post #120 of 1147
I would tell you if the Escobar family would return my phone calls already!
post #121 of 1147
post #122 of 1147
Quote:
Originally Posted by Renn Brown View Post

Fucking shit
that thing scares the fuck out of me. I raised my feet up off the floor when I saw the picture. Fuck you.

Fuck you. And fuck the god or natural forces that would create that monster. I'm upset now.
That thing definitely belongs in my Monster Manual. Make a saving throw VS shat-pants.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tati View Post
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worl...angladesh.html

Baby Born with two heads!
Dies 2 days later.
Geez. How many of these multi-limbed/headed muties are born in that part of the world? We've seen a ton of these stories. They better regulate that pollution better... or start a reality show. We'll call it: "You Betrayed Shiva!"
post #123 of 1147
post #124 of 1147
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chris Miller View Post
There can be only UNO?
post #125 of 1147
post #126 of 1147
Wow dude, two posts above you. And quoted one above. Wow.
post #127 of 1147
post #128 of 1147
post #129 of 1147
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chris Miller View Post
Wow dude, two posts above you. And quoted one above. Wow.
Florida man doesn't catch Highlander reference.
post #130 of 1147
Quote:
Originally Posted by Eric Cordo View Post
I even clicked on it. Awesome.

In other news:
Tap One Red Mana, Plus on mana of any color for each point of damage you wish to deal to target.
My nerdy headline is nerdy.
post #131 of 1147
Quote:
Originally Posted by nekkerbee View Post
Funny, I thought this would've been Florida. Turns out, it's Modesto. But I guess if Moons over My Hammy does that to a man. What can ya do?
post #132 of 1147
Quote:
Originally Posted by nekkerbee View Post
I'm amazed he found a piece of Denny's cutlery sharp enough to do the job. 99% of the time, at least here in NJ, the knives and forks at our Denny's are as sharp as a sack of wet mice*.

*apologies to Foghorn Leghorn.
post #133 of 1147
post #134 of 1147
post #135 of 1147
Quote:
All Robotic products come with the official John Landis seal of death
What?
post #136 of 1147
Thread Starter 
Homeless man strangles student, sticks around to watch horror movie

The only way the murderer's name could be any more appropriate would be if it were Strangle-y Chokesalot.
post #137 of 1147
post #138 of 1147
In the bizarre category:
Cops REALLY have nothing better to do in Florida.
ACLU could have a field day with this one.
post #139 of 1147
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chris Miller View Post
In the bizarre category:
Cops REALLY have nothing better to do in Florida.
ACLU could have a field day with this one.
...the laaaaand of the free....and the home...of the....braaaaaaaaaave!
post #140 of 1147
Look, I'm all for not having to see peoples ass or boxers, but involving the fucking cops? Jesus Christ! Oh, and it's in a beach community, but I'm sure no white women in swimsuits are being ticketed.
post #141 of 1147


No ifs, Ands or Butts....Even Myers87 couldn´t come up with a better catch phrase.
post #142 of 1147
All I have to say about that news story is it's about fuckin' time. Damned teenagers.
post #143 of 1147
http://www.geekologie.com/2008/09/post_49.php

Can't wait to see this thing walking around.
post #144 of 1147
Quote:
It is thought the insect will come down from its current position tomorrow and then 'wake up' on Friday before starting to explore the city.
Oh, I'm sure nothing will go wrong...right?
post #145 of 1147
Funny. Laws dictating how one wears one's pants are cool. Laws dictating whether or not women can go out in public with their faces uncovered are grounds for military action against your country. I think that the saggy-pants style is as retarded as the day is long - but in America you have the right to look like an idiot if you choose. Or at least you used to.
post #146 of 1147
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chris Miller View Post
Is it sad that when I read that I went, 'Oh, some d-bag must be fucking around with fire again?' And sure enough...I'm going to go sort through my boxes and boxes of cards.
post #147 of 1147
Quote:
Originally Posted by Doc Happenin View Post
Is it sad that when I read that I went, 'Oh, some d-bag must be fucking around with fire again?' And sure enough...I'm going to go sort through my boxes and boxes of cards.
Only as sad as I am for thinking of the headline in the first place. My alternate headline, by the way, was "Towards-Down Towards-Down + Punch".
post #148 of 1147
Quote:
Originally Posted by CNN
FRESNO, California (AP) -- Authorities say they've arrested a man who broke into the home of two California farmworkers, stole money, rubbed one with spices and whacked the other with a sausage before fleeing.
Officials: Burglar wakes men with spice rub, sausage whack
post #149 of 1147
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chris Miller View Post
Only as sad as I am for thinking of the headline in the first place. My alternate headline, by the way, was "Towards-Down Towards-Down + Punch".
The alternate headline wins.

Quote:
rubbed one with spices and whacked the other with a sausage before fleeing.
Fuck this world. No, you know what? I changed my mind, that's awesome.
post #150 of 1147
Quote:
Originally Posted by NEW YORK (AP)
Should this world ever cease to exist, Stephen Colbert will live on.

The comedian's DNA will be digitized and sent to the International Space Station, Comedy Central was to announce Monday. In October, video game designer Richard Garriott will travel to the station and deposit Colbert's genes for an "Immortality Drive."

"I am thrilled to have my DNA shot into space, as this brings me one step closer to my lifelong dream of being the baby at the end of 2001," Colbert said in a statement, referring to the 1968 landmark science fiction film "2001: A Space Odyssey."
Ha! Ha!
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