The Fail Draft Chosen
For Those About To Suck....We Salute You!
4.15 THE CONQUEROR (1956) d. Dick Powell (John Wayne, Susan Hayward)
Spectacular as its barbaric passions and savage conquests! Ghenghis Khan! The world trembled at his name! They conquered each other then the world!
5.7 MONDO CANE (1962) d. Paolo Cavara, Franco Prosperi, Gualtiero Jacopetti
All The Scenes You Will See In This Film Are True And Taken Only From Life...If Often They Are Shocking It Is Because There Are Many Astounding, Even Unbelievable Things In This World
2.22 CLEOPATRA (1963) d. Joseph L. Mankiewicz/ Rouben Mamoulian/ David F.Zanuck (Elizabeth Taylor, Richard Burton, Rex Harrison)
3.11 STRAIT-JACKET (1964) d. William Castle (Joan Crawford) Anderson
Her Husband...Her room....And Another Woman
WARNING! Strait-Jacket vividly depicts ax murders!
2.2 THE GREEN BERETS (1968) d. John Wayne/Mervyn LeRoy/Ray Kellogg (John Wayne, George Takei, Jim Hutton, Patrick Wayne, David Janssen, Vera Miles) Anderson
They had to be the toughest fighting force on earth-and the men who led them had to be just a little bit tougher! A special force in a special kind of hell!
So you don't believe in glory. And heroes are out of style. And they don't blow bugles anymore. So take another look at the special forces in a special kind of hell!
5.13 EXORCIST II: THE HERETIC (1977) d. John Boorman (Richard Burton, Linda Blair, Ned Beatty, James Earl Jones, Max von Sydow, Louise Fletcher)
It's four years later...what does she remember?
2.17 SGT. PEPPER'S LONELY HEARTS CLUB BAND (1978) d. Michael Schultz (Bee-Gees, Aerosmith, Peter Frampton, Donald Pleasence, Steve Martin, Earth, Wind & Fire, Alice Cooper, Billy Preston, George Burns, Keith Carradine, Carol Channing, Frankie Howerd, Leif Garrett, Heart, George Harrison) Keith
A Splendid Time Is Guaranteed For All!
4.10 SEXTETTE (1978) d. Ken Hughes (Mae West, Timothy Dalton, Tony Curtis, Ringo Starr, Dom DeLuise, George Hamilton, Keith Moon, Alice Cooper)
The Sin-Sational Mae West!
1.7 CALIGULA (1979) d. Tinto Brass/ Bob Guccione (Malcolm McDowell, Helen Mirren, Peter O'Toole, John Gielgud) Judas
What would you have done if you had been given absolute power of life and death over everybody else in the whole world
1.2 CRUISING (1980) d. William Friedkin (Al Pacino, Karen Allen, Paul Sorvino) Ed
Al Pacino is cruising for a killer!
2.20 XANADU (1980) d. Robert Greenwald (Olivia Newton-John, Gene Kelly)
A Fantasy, A Musical, a Place Where Dreams Come True. Where time stops and the magic never ends.
3.9 HEAVEN'S GATE (1980) d. Michael Cimino (Kris Kristofferson, Christopher Walken, Jeff Bridges, John Hurt, Mickey Rourke) Greg
What one loves about life are things that fade. The only thing greater than their passion for America..was their passion for each other.
5.16 GLORIA (1980) John Cassavetes (Gena Rowlands, Buck Henry)
She's tough..but she sides with the little guy. and she's out to beat the mob at their own game
4.12 PINK FLOYD'S THE WALL (1982) d. Alan Parker (Bob Geldof, Bob Hoskins)
The Memories. The Madness. The Music...The Movie
5.2 TURKISH STAR WARS (The Man Who Saves The World)
2.4 RETURN OF THE JEDI (1983) d. Richard Marquand (Harrison Ford, Billy Dee Williams, Frank Oz, Mark Hamill, Carrie Fisher) Fat Elvis
Return to a Galaxy...Far, Far Away The Empire Falls....
2.16 THE OSTERMAN WEEKEND (1983) d. Sam Peckinpah (Rutger Hauer, Dennis Hopper, Craig T. Nelson, John Hurt, Meg Foster) Banks
The one weekend of the year you won't want to miss....isolation, violence, slaughter. It will be a weekend to remember...if they survive it!
5.14 SCARFACE (1983) d. Brian DePalma (Al Pacino, Steven Bauer, Michelle Pfeiffer, Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio, F. Murray Abraham, Robert Loggia)
He was Tony Montana. The world will remember him by another name...SCARFACE!
He loved the American Dream. With a Vengeance. The world is yours....
3.24 LORDS OF DISCIPLINE (1983) d. Franc Roddam (David Keith, Michael Biehn, Rick Rossovich)
One hundred years of the finest school turning out the finest young men. IT WAS ALL A LIE. One cadet is about to expose the system.
5.5 JAWS 3-D (1983) d. Joe Alves (Dennis Quaid, Lea Thompson, Bess Armstrong, Louis Gossett, Jr.)
The Third Dimension is....Terror!
1.17 DUNE (1984) d. David Lynch (Kyle MacLachlan, Sting, Brad Dourif, Linda Hunt, Virginia Madsen, Patrick Stewart, Dean Stockwell, Sean Young, Max von Sydow) Shark
The Motion Picture Event For 1984! A place beyond your dreams. A world beyond your experience. A movie beyond your imagination
3.10 CITY HEAT (1984) d. Richard Benjamin (Clint Eastwood, Burt Reynolds) Keith
Take Clint the street-smart cop...take Burt the wise-guy private eye..and then take cover!
When a hotshot cop and a wise-guy detective get together...the heat is on!
4.11 YEAR OF THE DRAGON (1985) d. Michael Cimino (Mickey Rourke)
It isn't the Bronx or Brooklyn. It isn't even New York. It's Chinatown...and it's about to explode!
4.23 THE BLACK CAULDRON (1985)
Hidden by darkness. Guarded by witches. Discovered by a boy. Stolen by a king. Whoever owns it will rule the world. Or destroy it!
3.6 HOWARD THE DUCK (1986) d. Willard Huyck (Lea Thompson, Tim Robbins, Jeffrey Jones)
Trapped in a world he never made. A new breed of hero. More adventure than humanly possible.
5.8 SPACEBALLS (1987) d. Mel Brooks (Bill Pullman, Daphne Zuniga, Rick Moranis, John Candy, Michael Winslow, Joan Rivers, Jim J. Bullock, John Hurt)
Once upon a time warp in deep space, the struggle between nice & rotten goes on.... May the Farce be with you.
2.18 ISHTAR (1987) d. Elaine May (Warren Beatty, Dustin Hoffman, Charles Grodin) Jyav
5.12 SUPERMAN IV :THE QUEST FOR PEACE (1987) Sidney J. Furie (Christopher Reeve, Gene Hackman, Jon Cryer, Mariel Hemingway, Margot Kidder)
Nuclear Power. In the best hands, it is dangerous. In the hands of Lex Luthor, it is pure evil. This is Superman's greatest battle. And it is for all of us!
3.17 RAMBO III (1988) d. Peter MacDonald (Sylvester Stallone)
The first was for himself. The second for his country. This time it's to save his friend. God would have mercy John Rambo won't!
5.21 WHO FRAMED ROGER RABBIT? (1988) d. Robert Zemeckis (Bob Hoskins, Christopher Lloyd, Joanna Cassidy, Kathleen Turner, Amy Irving, Nancy Cartwright, Charles Fleischer)
It's the story of a man, a woman, and a rabbit in a triangle of trouble
5.24 STAR TREK V (1989) d. William Shatner (William Shatner, Leonard NimoyGeorge Takei, DeForest Kelley, Nichelle Nichols, James Doohan, David Warner)
The Enterprise is back. This time, have they gone too far? What does God need with a starship? Adventure and Imagination Will Meet At The Final Frontier
Why Are They Putting Seatbelts in Theatres This Summer?
5.18 CADDYSHACK 2 (1988) d. Allan Arkush (Chevy Chase, Dan Aykroyd, Randy Quaid, Jackie Mason, Dyan Cannon, Robert Stack, Jonathan Silverman, Marsha Warfield)
Home of the rich and tasteless. The shack is back!
2.27 GHOSTBUSTERS II (1989) d. Ivan Reitman (Bill Murray, Dan Akroyd, Harold Ramis, Ernie Hudson)
The Superstars of the Supernatural are Back. And this time, it's no marshmellow roast!
4.3 HARLEM NIGHTS (1989) d. Eddie Murphy (Eddie Murphy, Richard Pryor, Redd Foxx, Jasmine Guy, Lela Rochon, Arsenio Hall, Charlie Murphy) Keith
They're up to something big!
1.20 BACK TO THE FUTURE PART II (1989) d. Robert Zemeckis (Michael J. Fox, Elisabeth Shue, Lea Thompson, Billy Zane, Thomas F. Wilson, Christopher Lloyd) Fat Elvis
Getting back was only the beginning. Roads? Where we're going, we don't need roads! Do you remember...The Future? It's About Time
{continued}
For Those About To Suck....We Salute You!
4.15 THE CONQUEROR (1956) d. Dick Powell (John Wayne, Susan Hayward)
Spectacular as its barbaric passions and savage conquests! Ghenghis Khan! The world trembled at his name! They conquered each other then the world!
5.7 MONDO CANE (1962) d. Paolo Cavara, Franco Prosperi, Gualtiero Jacopetti
All The Scenes You Will See In This Film Are True And Taken Only From Life...If Often They Are Shocking It Is Because There Are Many Astounding, Even Unbelievable Things In This World
2.22 CLEOPATRA (1963) d. Joseph L. Mankiewicz/ Rouben Mamoulian/ David F.Zanuck (Elizabeth Taylor, Richard Burton, Rex Harrison)
3.11 STRAIT-JACKET (1964) d. William Castle (Joan Crawford) Anderson
Her Husband...Her room....And Another Woman
WARNING! Strait-Jacket vividly depicts ax murders!
2.2 THE GREEN BERETS (1968) d. John Wayne/Mervyn LeRoy/Ray Kellogg (John Wayne, George Takei, Jim Hutton, Patrick Wayne, David Janssen, Vera Miles) Anderson
They had to be the toughest fighting force on earth-and the men who led them had to be just a little bit tougher! A special force in a special kind of hell!
So you don't believe in glory. And heroes are out of style. And they don't blow bugles anymore. So take another look at the special forces in a special kind of hell!
5.13 EXORCIST II: THE HERETIC (1977) d. John Boorman (Richard Burton, Linda Blair, Ned Beatty, James Earl Jones, Max von Sydow, Louise Fletcher)
It's four years later...what does she remember?
2.17 SGT. PEPPER'S LONELY HEARTS CLUB BAND (1978) d. Michael Schultz (Bee-Gees, Aerosmith, Peter Frampton, Donald Pleasence, Steve Martin, Earth, Wind & Fire, Alice Cooper, Billy Preston, George Burns, Keith Carradine, Carol Channing, Frankie Howerd, Leif Garrett, Heart, George Harrison) Keith
A Splendid Time Is Guaranteed For All!
4.10 SEXTETTE (1978) d. Ken Hughes (Mae West, Timothy Dalton, Tony Curtis, Ringo Starr, Dom DeLuise, George Hamilton, Keith Moon, Alice Cooper)
The Sin-Sational Mae West!
1.7 CALIGULA (1979) d. Tinto Brass/ Bob Guccione (Malcolm McDowell, Helen Mirren, Peter O'Toole, John Gielgud) Judas
What would you have done if you had been given absolute power of life and death over everybody else in the whole world
1.2 CRUISING (1980) d. William Friedkin (Al Pacino, Karen Allen, Paul Sorvino) Ed
Al Pacino is cruising for a killer!
2.20 XANADU (1980) d. Robert Greenwald (Olivia Newton-John, Gene Kelly)
A Fantasy, A Musical, a Place Where Dreams Come True. Where time stops and the magic never ends.
3.9 HEAVEN'S GATE (1980) d. Michael Cimino (Kris Kristofferson, Christopher Walken, Jeff Bridges, John Hurt, Mickey Rourke) Greg
What one loves about life are things that fade. The only thing greater than their passion for America..was their passion for each other.
5.16 GLORIA (1980) John Cassavetes (Gena Rowlands, Buck Henry)
She's tough..but she sides with the little guy. and she's out to beat the mob at their own game
4.12 PINK FLOYD'S THE WALL (1982) d. Alan Parker (Bob Geldof, Bob Hoskins)
The Memories. The Madness. The Music...The Movie
5.2 TURKISH STAR WARS (The Man Who Saves The World)
2.4 RETURN OF THE JEDI (1983) d. Richard Marquand (Harrison Ford, Billy Dee Williams, Frank Oz, Mark Hamill, Carrie Fisher) Fat Elvis
Return to a Galaxy...Far, Far Away The Empire Falls....
2.16 THE OSTERMAN WEEKEND (1983) d. Sam Peckinpah (Rutger Hauer, Dennis Hopper, Craig T. Nelson, John Hurt, Meg Foster) Banks
The one weekend of the year you won't want to miss....isolation, violence, slaughter. It will be a weekend to remember...if they survive it!
5.14 SCARFACE (1983) d. Brian DePalma (Al Pacino, Steven Bauer, Michelle Pfeiffer, Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio, F. Murray Abraham, Robert Loggia)
He was Tony Montana. The world will remember him by another name...SCARFACE!
He loved the American Dream. With a Vengeance. The world is yours....
3.24 LORDS OF DISCIPLINE (1983) d. Franc Roddam (David Keith, Michael Biehn, Rick Rossovich)
One hundred years of the finest school turning out the finest young men. IT WAS ALL A LIE. One cadet is about to expose the system.
5.5 JAWS 3-D (1983) d. Joe Alves (Dennis Quaid, Lea Thompson, Bess Armstrong, Louis Gossett, Jr.)
The Third Dimension is....Terror!
1.17 DUNE (1984) d. David Lynch (Kyle MacLachlan, Sting, Brad Dourif, Linda Hunt, Virginia Madsen, Patrick Stewart, Dean Stockwell, Sean Young, Max von Sydow) Shark
The Motion Picture Event For 1984! A place beyond your dreams. A world beyond your experience. A movie beyond your imagination
3.10 CITY HEAT (1984) d. Richard Benjamin (Clint Eastwood, Burt Reynolds) Keith
Take Clint the street-smart cop...take Burt the wise-guy private eye..and then take cover!
When a hotshot cop and a wise-guy detective get together...the heat is on!
4.11 YEAR OF THE DRAGON (1985) d. Michael Cimino (Mickey Rourke)
It isn't the Bronx or Brooklyn. It isn't even New York. It's Chinatown...and it's about to explode!
4.23 THE BLACK CAULDRON (1985)
Hidden by darkness. Guarded by witches. Discovered by a boy. Stolen by a king. Whoever owns it will rule the world. Or destroy it!
3.6 HOWARD THE DUCK (1986) d. Willard Huyck (Lea Thompson, Tim Robbins, Jeffrey Jones)
Trapped in a world he never made. A new breed of hero. More adventure than humanly possible.
5.8 SPACEBALLS (1987) d. Mel Brooks (Bill Pullman, Daphne Zuniga, Rick Moranis, John Candy, Michael Winslow, Joan Rivers, Jim J. Bullock, John Hurt)
Once upon a time warp in deep space, the struggle between nice & rotten goes on.... May the Farce be with you.
2.18 ISHTAR (1987) d. Elaine May (Warren Beatty, Dustin Hoffman, Charles Grodin) Jyav
5.12 SUPERMAN IV :THE QUEST FOR PEACE (1987) Sidney J. Furie (Christopher Reeve, Gene Hackman, Jon Cryer, Mariel Hemingway, Margot Kidder)
Nuclear Power. In the best hands, it is dangerous. In the hands of Lex Luthor, it is pure evil. This is Superman's greatest battle. And it is for all of us!
3.17 RAMBO III (1988) d. Peter MacDonald (Sylvester Stallone)
The first was for himself. The second for his country. This time it's to save his friend. God would have mercy John Rambo won't!
5.21 WHO FRAMED ROGER RABBIT? (1988) d. Robert Zemeckis (Bob Hoskins, Christopher Lloyd, Joanna Cassidy, Kathleen Turner, Amy Irving, Nancy Cartwright, Charles Fleischer)
It's the story of a man, a woman, and a rabbit in a triangle of trouble
5.24 STAR TREK V (1989) d. William Shatner (William Shatner, Leonard NimoyGeorge Takei, DeForest Kelley, Nichelle Nichols, James Doohan, David Warner)
The Enterprise is back. This time, have they gone too far? What does God need with a starship? Adventure and Imagination Will Meet At The Final Frontier
Why Are They Putting Seatbelts in Theatres This Summer?
5.18 CADDYSHACK 2 (1988) d. Allan Arkush (Chevy Chase, Dan Aykroyd, Randy Quaid, Jackie Mason, Dyan Cannon, Robert Stack, Jonathan Silverman, Marsha Warfield)
Home of the rich and tasteless. The shack is back!
2.27 GHOSTBUSTERS II (1989) d. Ivan Reitman (Bill Murray, Dan Akroyd, Harold Ramis, Ernie Hudson)
The Superstars of the Supernatural are Back. And this time, it's no marshmellow roast!
4.3 HARLEM NIGHTS (1989) d. Eddie Murphy (Eddie Murphy, Richard Pryor, Redd Foxx, Jasmine Guy, Lela Rochon, Arsenio Hall, Charlie Murphy) Keith
They're up to something big!
1.20 BACK TO THE FUTURE PART II (1989) d. Robert Zemeckis (Michael J. Fox, Elisabeth Shue, Lea Thompson, Billy Zane, Thomas F. Wilson, Christopher Lloyd) Fat Elvis
Getting back was only the beginning. Roads? Where we're going, we don't need roads! Do you remember...The Future? It's About Time
{continued}



