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Goddamnit, Ratner Might Be CONAN's Man After All - Page 2

post #51 of 74
10/17/08 at 10:13pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Slater View Post
Ratner is hardly the worst choice for something like this, especially when guys like Paul Anderson or Rob Cohen are sniffing around for their next project. And if you truly hate Ratner, the bright side is that this gig (temporarily) keeps him out of contention for projects like Captain America or the inevitable Superman reboot.

I really don't see the downside.
And it keeps from trying to do that Boys from Brazil remake.
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post #52 of 74
10/18/08 at 9:49pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Slater View Post
Fuck, I'm shocked Chuck Russell isn't behind the camera.
I'd sooner trust the director of THE BLOB remake over Ratner. Maybe Russell could even get the new & angry Darabont to take a look at the script.
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post #53 of 74
10/18/08 at 11:21pm
Only an idiot would prefer a Brett Ratner-directed movie to a Chuck Russell-directed movie. Has a Ratner film ever sniffed the shoes of, say, "Eraser"?
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post #54 of 74
10/18/08 at 11:34pm
Oh yeah, the auteur behind The Scorpion King is nigh infallible. Move passed the blind Ratner hatred, guys. You will only know a greater happiness once you have.
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post #55 of 74
10/19/08 at 12:37am
I like the recent Conan comic books by Dark Horse. They feature the wiley thief/brawler version of Conan. In particular, I like the quasi-civilised and mystic realm of Hyperborea. It's a bit more pulpy and fun than the more literate LotR universe.

The director choice is not fantasic, but I'm keen for more genre/action films that aren't about superheros so it coul dbe a change.

Note: I saw Mongol this year hoping it would capture the Conan-vibe and it sorta did, but was generally a bit disappointing.
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post #56 of 74
10/19/08 at 1:20am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Matt OCallaghan View Post
Oh yeah, the auteur behind The Scorpion King is nigh infallible. Move passed the blind Ratner hatred, guys. You will only know a greater happiness once you have.
Hey, one filmmaker has made watchable films. Thinking that guy is Ratner strikes me as some form of insanity.
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post #57 of 74
10/19/08 at 2:19am
ratner???

Really??


i..i..

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post #58 of 74
10/19/08 at 2:54am
Quote:
Originally Posted by KABONG View Post
Hey, one filmmaker has made watchable films. Thinking that guy is Ratner strikes me as some form of insanity.
Bullfuckingshit. As has said before, Ratner is an uninspired shooter who gets hate flung at him because of his big mouth and he gets to shag hot chicks. More power to him, I say. He has made a bunch of Shrug-who-gives-a-shit movies, nothing worse. Chuck Russel made The Mask. That film is piss.
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post #59 of 74
10/19/08 at 3:44am
You're defending the man who's made the Rush Hour films, a needless remake of Manhunter and the huge turd in the toilet bowl that is X-Men 3. Ratner is the purest definition of "generic, bland cookie cutter director who makes safe and uninspired movies".

The sooner the man gets disfiguring gonorrhea that'll liquefy his balls and cause them to shoot out of his ass...the better.
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post #60 of 74
10/19/08 at 3:58am
Eh. I don't really feel like I am "defending" the guy; just seems like Ratner is a favorite hate-pile up target around here and it's tedious. I've never seen any of the Rush Hour movies as they are not my thing and I didn't think his X-Man film was any worse than Singers first effort, so the hate kinda of baffles me. You guys don't wail on his ass because of his films; there are worse film makers out there fucking up much better projects than this guy. Seems harmless to me.
Only time I've ever given a shit about him was when he was attached to The Wolf Man but hey! We got Joe Johnston instead! Bullet: Dodged!
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post #61 of 74
10/19/08 at 4:01am
Have you seen Red Dragon Matt?

The guy took the best of the Lacter stories, cast Norton, Hopkins, Fiennes, Hoffman and Emily fuckin Watson - and some how managed to shit out one of the most boring films I have ever seen.

As a consequence, I personally don't want this bland hack anywhere near Conan - and will happily ignore it completely if it's made.
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post #62 of 74
10/19/08 at 4:19am
Exactly you will ignore it. I don't see what the fuss is about. We got the best Conan movie we are ever going to get so I don't give a tinkers cuss. I'm not saying Ratner is awesome or anything, I was just stunned that Chuck Russel's name was bought up as being somehow imminently superior to Ratner, ultimately. It's indicative of the instant dog-pile mentality that goes on anytime his name is mentioned and it tends to bury any actual discussion of whatever project under a "boo ass rape ball-lick usuck fatty" diatribe.
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post #63 of 74
10/19/08 at 4:31am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Matt OCallaghan View Post
Exactly you will ignore it. I don't see what the fuss is about. We got the best Conan movie we are ever going to get so I don't give a tinkers cuss.
Gotta stop you right there mate, as if thats your take, we aint ever gonna agree on this one. The original Arnie film is good mindless Milius fun, but that isn't Howards Conan - thats the Conan Im still waiting to see on screen. Played by someone preferably who's acting chops at the time of filming are a little more advanced than being able to basically grunt and say their name.

Ratner will not give me that Conan.
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post #64 of 74
10/19/08 at 5:53am
If this were an earlier era of filmmaker, Russell would at least have a place as some sort of empty-headed showman or technician, somebody who hung around because of an appreciation of film. Brett Ratner would have been laughed off every set in Hollywood, because his films reflect an ape's viewpoint and maturity level, without any understanding of film. Chuck Russell's an also-ran- Ratner's a never-ran. The only defense I can think of for him is, "His movies move like a half hour of television", and if that's the only praise that can keep a filmmaker from being branded a fool, then how low are our expectations for people who get behind a camera?
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post #65 of 74
10/19/08 at 6:15am
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Rain Dog View Post

Ratner will not give me that Conan.

No one is going to give you that Conan. That's kind of my point. It's not going to happen. I think its stupid to get in a tizzy because a second rate film director is maybe making a film version of a property studio heads don't give a shit about other than its a name some people have heard of and might be exploitable as a franchise.
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post #66 of 74
10/19/08 at 6:19am
Quote:
Originally Posted by KABONG View Post
If this were an earlier era of filmmaker, Russell would at least have a place as some sort of empty-headed showman or technician, somebody who hung around because of an appreciation of film
But it's not an earlier era so wtf? Russell made one decent film and that was a good while ago. Eraser sucks, The Mask sucks, The Scorpion King sucks. He isn't a preferable film maker for any project unless Shawn Levy is up for the same gig.
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post #67 of 74
10/19/08 at 6:42am
Also that description you just gave is one that is equally applicable to Ratner.
You are talking out of your ass.
I fucking hate you for making me feel like I am defending this guy.
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post #68 of 74
10/19/08 at 9:44am
I remember really liking The Rush hour movies (1+2) and Red Dragon when they came out. I also remember most people I know thought the same. That was before I had ever really heard about Ratner. I also like X-3 and don't find it particularly better or worse than 1 and 2. I don't love his films but when I watch them I'm mostly entertained. I couldn't care less about his lifestyle or character, it's fucking Hollywood, most of these guys are loons.
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post #69 of 74
10/19/08 at 10:21am
It's a movie written by the guys behind a DTV sci-fi flick, financed by a second-rate production company and based on a twenty-five year-old Schwarzenegger vehicle. Yes, I know the character's origins but you are fools if you think this will not be a loose remake of Milius' work.

Ratner is definitely more competent than Russell. He's just a gun-for-hire and as such bland and mostly harmless.
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post #70 of 74
10/20/08 at 9:36am
Yeah well ya know what guys? As a fan of Howards original creation forgive me for not treating this intellectual property with the dismissive cynicism the studios, Ratner, and many in this thread seem to be.

I love the original Conan - the guys the sword and sorcery answer to James Bond (smart as whip, best of the best but living in a world where if he can't fuck it, he'll kill it) - and I refuse to feel bad about being somewhat frustrated that everything thats good about the character will get pissed away on screen - yet again.

...and Im sorry but the original Milius Conan is not that far fucking removed from The Scorpion King in quality - there I said it.

Ya know who I'd like to see tackle Conan to do him justice? Robert fucking Rodriguez and his ilk. I don't hate Ratner, I don't know the guy - but I know he's a wonderful symbol of everything wrong with modern Hollywood.

I look at him and I'm reminded of Albert Brooks tirade in Broadcast News (a tirade that becomes more and more relevant as I get older)...


What do you think the Devil is going to look like if he's around? Nobody is going to be taken in if he has a long, red, pointy tail. No. I'm semi-serious here. He will look attractive and he will be nice and helpful and he will get a job where he influences a great God-fearing nation and he will never do an evil thing ... he will just bit by little bit lower standards where they are important. Just coax along flash over substance ... Just a tiny bit. And he will talk about all of us really being salesmen. And he'll get all the great women.


...every time I see Ratner now - alnog with quite a few others in modern culture - I remember that epic immortal monologue that made such an impression on me when I was about 13.
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post #71 of 74
10/20/08 at 9:57am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Slater View Post
I don't understand why a fan of Neil Marshall would want him to waste a year or more on a soulless paycheck gig like this as opposed to writing and directing something original. I know I'd rather have another Descent or even Doomsday.

Ratner is hardly the worst choice for something like this, especially when guys like Paul Anderson or Rob Cohen are sniffing around for their next project. And if you truly hate Ratner, the bright side is that this gig (temporarily) keeps him out of contention for projects like Captain America or the inevitable Superman reboot.

I really don't see the downside.
Basically, this.
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post #72 of 74
10/20/08 at 10:03am
Again, this thread simply seems to be populated with people who really don't seem to really dig The Barbarian at all.

Cappie - couldn't give a fuck - give him to Ratner.

hell, give any comic book superhero (besides Supes or Bats) to Ratner and 'd have trouble caring.

Conans been an untouched property for over 20 years and never been done justice considering the source material - Ratner can fuck right off as far as Im concerned.
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post #73 of 74
10/20/08 at 10:13am
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Rain Dog View Post
Again, this thread simply seems to be populated with people who really don't seem to really dig The Barbarian at all.
.


No no no.
I grew up reading this stuff and loved it; I just dont believe we are going to get a decent screen interpretation of this property EVER so I don't see the point in bitching. A good adaption of this material the way you/we want to see it just isn't' going to happen. Period.
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post #74 of 74
10/20/08 at 11:06am
one can hope can't one??

i love the original books/comics (have almost all of them. thanks dad) and will re-read them every few years or so

i wish someone would do (as perfectly stated above) a Conan as the James Bond of his era
an intelligent and nearly amoral (save for his middle ages era style of chivalry) personality who never quite fit in with society, so rather then try and fit in, he took the crown of the biggest nation in the world.
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