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The "Song that Killed Music" Thread - Page 3

post #101 of 174
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jack Dnim View Post
You could take it as is and drop into an art exhibition, set up a monitor, speakers, people would gather around and comment on its bold stance to whatever.
I might use this as an excuse when I inevitably pirate whatever they release. Like, say in a snobbish tone of voice that I consider it "found art" or something.
post #102 of 174
The village people's finest hour?

http:///au.youtube.com/watch?v=8hYtUYiuzkw
post #103 of 174
Well, if you've read my posts on this board, 99.9% of all popular music has tried valiantly to kill that miniscule percentile of listenable sounds, which are probably begging for change and getting drunk or on welfare. But for the purpose of this thread, I'll specifically mention Big Trouble in Little China. They will probably never get to bother you as their name suggests, or play their heavy metal in the nearest ethno-specific neighborhood, but their namesake alone pisses on a perfectly fine John Carpenter movie - I can't recount how many times I've dragged friends to the bar in hopes of getting smashed to at least well-tuned rock music, only to be told by the doorman Big Trouble in Little China are playing a set - and I turn to my friends entering the venue cussing under my breath to ward them off before my credibility is lost - "So Derek, what's -" "No. No. Not here..." "But who's-" "It's shit man, shit. Let's get out of here..." and one of their groupies brushes past me, curious of what I'm referring to, but as obvious as it is, doesn't call me out because he or she know deep down just how awful they are - it's just that there are fewer and fewer bands to latch onto as more venues are closed forever. I felt bad for their videographer as I trashed them and he had a defeated glint in his eyes, angry more at the fact there's nothing around him really worth documenting except my disparaging words to himself. The arts community is sitting on crap without a single pearl in it - if only there was more going on, Big Trouble Little China wouldn't trail me around in my evenings like the specter of a used car salesman - or am I an elitist being guided to these shows by my subconscious, taunting them with my money and then heading off because I must feel their bad taste is specifically against me?
post #104 of 174
What?
post #105 of 174
Quote:
Originally Posted by Misfit View Post
What?
He does this every now and then, possibly in an attempt to justify his username.
post #106 of 174
Ah, okay.

Back to Brokencyde*, I've now studied that video like it's the Zapruder film. My favorite moment is at 2:07. The look on the face of the girl in the criss-cross outfit is embarrassment personified. It's like she had absolutely no clue what she was getting into until she got down there.



*Incidentally, this will be the name of my debut album
post #107 of 174
Let's parse this -

Quote:
Originally Posted by dreary louse View Post
Well, if you've read my posts on this board, 99.9% of all popular music has tried valiantly to kill that miniscule percentile of listenable sounds...
- shall we?

Here, drearylouse is telling us that, if we do not read his posts, we will save modern music. Read it again. If we read his posts, music will destroy itself. From this, it logically follows that not reading his posts will get every band you've ever loved signed to a major label and all of the critical acclaim they rightly deserve.

I think we all know what we need to do.

As long as we're fixing everything that's wrong with the world, I'd like to request that no one under the age of 25 be allowed to read any Beat literature without parental consent or an English degree. Because this is what happens.
post #108 of 174
Forget it, MissZooey. It's Big Trouble in Little Chinatown.
post #109 of 174
Let's get freaky now?
post #110 of 174
Fuckin' freaky now, yes.
post #111 of 174
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissZooey View Post
Let's get freaky now?

YRRRRROOOOAWWWRRRR!!!!!!
post #112 of 174
It's very difficult to piss my roommate off, but I've done it. Simply by mimicking the "Freaxxx" "blahhhhhh" scream every time he asks a question or tries to speak to me. I think I've broken the poor man's soul.



Quote:
Originally Posted by DaveB
YRRRRROOOOAWWWRRRR!!!!!!

Exactly.
post #113 of 174
Quote:
Originally Posted by DaveB
YRRRRROOOOAWWWRRRR!!!!!!
Again, he's been doing that at home. A lot.
post #114 of 174
Does he do the hand bounce thing with it? If so, can I come over for dinner?
post #115 of 174
Quote:
Originally Posted by Misfit View Post
Does he do the hand bounce thing with it? If so, can I come over for dinner?
No, but you can still come over for dinner whenever you'd like. White bean casserole and baked apples tonight.
post #116 of 174
Sweet, thanks. I'll stop by Hot Topic and pick up his n' hers Brokencyde shirts as a thank you.
post #117 of 174
Oh, this is going to be awesome.
post #118 of 174
If you're coming, make sure you've got your scream down. It comes off like a hollow gesture when it's just me roaring at MissZooey.
post #119 of 174
I'll bring Matchstick and we can try to do it in three-part harmony.
post #120 of 174
That exchange caused me to, what we refer to in the dying music industry as, fucking lol.
post #121 of 174
Quote:
Originally Posted by Misfit View Post
Ah, okay.

Back to Brokencyde*, I've now studied that video like it's the Zapruder film. My favorite moment is at 2:07. The look on the face of the girl in the criss-cross outfit is embarrassment personified. It's like she had absolutely no clue what she was getting into until she got down there.



*Incidentally, this will be the name of my debut album
post #122 of 174
Quote:
Originally Posted by Renn Brown View Post
I think I'd have the same look on my face if some basement-dweller was trying to rub his gizmo on my leg...
post #123 of 174
Thread Starter 
I'm afraid there's a line where your twisted fascination for something like this becomes indistinguishable from actually liking it....
post #124 of 174
That line is very, very far from this place, sir. Move along.
post #125 of 174
Quote:
Originally Posted by Misfit View Post
Forget it, MissZooey. It's Big Trouble in Little Chinatown.
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissZooey View Post
Let's get freaky now?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Misfit View Post
Fuckin' freaky now, yes.
Quote:
Originally Posted by DaveB View Post
YRRRRROOOOAWWWRRRR!!!!!!
This may be my favourite exchange on CHUD ever.
post #126 of 174
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissZooey View Post

Here, drearylouse is telling us that, if we do not read his posts, we will save modern music. Read it again. If we read his posts, music will destroy itself. From this, it logically follows that not reading his posts will get every band you've ever loved signed to a major label and all of the critical acclaim they rightly deserve.

I think we all know what we need to do.

As long as we're fixing everything that's wrong with the world, I'd like to request that no one under the age of 25 be allowed to read any Beat literature without parental consent or an English degree. Because this is what happens.
No, I said that many of my posts on this forum make it apparent that I believe 99.9% of all music is crap and so for myself to post in this thread seems redundant, but I had a specific example to express what may be my own elitism or poor fortune (regarding my taste in music).

If I was unclear, it's because when I don't edit my writing I sound like a snot-nosed beatnik, though I don't actually read much Kerouac or Ginsberg.
post #127 of 174
Thread Starter 
Just for the record, when I said "your" fascination, it wasn't aimed at anyone... perhaps "one's fascination" would've been better. Ah, nevermind.
post #128 of 174
Quote:
Originally Posted by Francis Wolcott View Post
Just for the record, when I said "your" fascination, it wasn't aimed at anyone... perhaps "one's fascination" would've been better. Ah, nevermind.
I know what you meant. And, on second thought, I think that dreary louse hates this song so much that he loves it. So sic 'im.
post #129 of 174
Jesus Christ, clicking links in this thread is like being in an abusive relationship. I'm actually impressed by the competition because I was totally convinced that the original "brokencyde" video murdered this shit at the jump, but the last few pages have been a force to be reckoned with. A Slipknot boy band? I mean, I get brokencyde in a (fucking depressing) way, because I can imagine a certain idiot-teenager demographic that would love it, but a Slipknot boy band? Fucking hell, is there a market for that of ANY size?

My personal favorite is the "Why Can't I Cry" dude, because I have never heard someone completely murder Autotune with such ease & efficiency. Like the Terminator of music.
post #130 of 174
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissZooey View Post
Again, he's been doing that at home. A lot.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Misfit View Post
Does he do the hand bounce thing with it? If so, can I come over for dinner?


Quote:
Originally Posted by Misfit View Post
I'll bring Matchstick and we can try to do it in three-part harmony.

...
post #131 of 174
That bit where the girl smiles as Se7en (goddammit) is choking her creeps me out to no end.

Why am I still thinking about this song? I'm going to end up buying their album, aren't I?
post #132 of 174
If these kids weren't white, everyone wouldn't be so outraged over them.
post #133 of 174
Brokencyde looks like someone conjured up Kajagoogoo from the depths of the 80s and told them "Here's how you can suck even more."
post #134 of 174
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alex Augustine View Post
If these kids weren't white, everyone wouldn't be so outraged over them.
I already hate myself for this, but please explain.
post #135 of 174
But they are white, Alex... they are.
post #136 of 174
Quote:
Originally Posted by Misfit View Post
I already hate myself for this, but please explain.
This is no better or worse than the every T-Pain/ Vocoder song that is constantly playing on every hip hop radio station as we speak. If Brokencyde were 4 black youths I don't think anyone would have noticed them or bothered to comment on them.
post #137 of 174
You honestly don't see the inherent douche factor* of these guys?This awful, awful song, the stupid pig costume, and the girls who look like they'd rather be anywhere else on the planet? Race doesn't even remotely factor into this.

*Inherent Douche Factor will be the name of my band.
post #138 of 174
And the hair, please don't forget the hair.
post #139 of 174
Seriously though, the fact that they look like The Hills rejects does make it funnier. So what's the problem?
post #140 of 174
Their whiteness and obvious not-poorness also robs it of any potential for a tragic "they've-pinned-their-hopes-of-escaping-poverty-on-this-shitheap" dimension. They don't have to do this. They don't need to do this. They probably think they worked really hard to make it, but they didn't. The lack of adversity is plastered all over the video and the models who would probably be happy to be sprayed with a fire extinguisher during a slow-motion, topless slapfight in a T-Pain video, but are all but holding their noses to cash this paycheck.

So yeah, their whiteness makes them extra bad.
post #141 of 174
Quote:
Originally Posted by Misfit View Post
That bit where the girl smiles as Se7en (goddammit) is choking her creeps me out to no end.

Why am I still thinking about this song? I'm going to end up buying their album, aren't I?
She was smiling because she thought someone was going to end her pain. I'd smile too if it meant death over listening to these fuckknuckles.
post #142 of 174
Quote:
Originally Posted by James Kimbell View Post







...
I think someone nailed it above. She's glad she's not doing porn. Probably.
post #143 of 174
Well, they're coming to my town on October 5th, at a venue just a couple of miles from my place. Can I come stay with somebody who lives on the other side of the country that night? Otherwise, the "stare at a car wreck" factor may cause me to go. I'm a weak man.
post #144 of 174
Quote:
Originally Posted by Misfit View Post
Well, they're coming to my town on October 5th, at a venue just a couple of miles from my place. Can I come stay with somebody who lives on the other side of the country that night? Otherwise, the "stare at a car wreck" factor may cause me to go. I'm a weak man.
Go.
Go see this band perform right in front of you.



You must.
post #145 of 174
Do it faggot.
post #146 of 174
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ScDrB6ud8u0

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9F444CELomo

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-qm5B612acU

After these three songs, I think the Black Eyed Peas should bring it to an end. And by it I don't just mean the band and their career, I mean their fucking lives.
post #147 of 174
post #148 of 174
Quote:
Originally Posted by Whirlybird View Post
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ScDrB6ud8u0

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9F444CELomo

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-qm5B612acU

After these three songs, I think the Black Eyed Peas should bring it to an end. And by it I don't just mean the band and their career, I mean their fucking lives.
I think we've found an answer to Nick's question about Rascal Flatts. Why is this band still allowed to make music?
post #149 of 174
Like peanut butter and chocolate...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ocgwc0JBPXU
post #150 of 174
Quote:
Originally Posted by Francis Wolcott View Post
If we are going full blown wtf in this thread, there's always this masterpiece and if anyone understands spanish, there's this.

edit: Actually, now that I've already posted a song in spanish here, I might as well turn you all into bigots.
I know it's way overdue, and perhaps vaguely shameful, but I am just fucking in love with that Umbrella cover. I actually prefer it to the original, and his dancing is kinda hypnotic.
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