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Jess Franco's "Killer Barbys"

post #1 of 9
9/23/02 at 2:42am
Thread Starter 
Probably in a case of "they all told me so", I went out and rented the latest Franco flick "Killer Barbys". I've never see a Franco flick before, never cared to...but this plot was just daffy enough to catch my interest:

The Killer Barbies (their correct spelling) - essentially a Spanish Misfits-like band with a ultra-hot lead female singer - are on their way to their next gig when the van they're travelling in breaks down near a castle. In a Scooby-Doo like move, they wind up staying at the castle and crazy hijinks ensues.

But Franco is so clearly an inept filmmaker, he screws it up with lazy directing and awful production values. It wasn't long before I stopped the film and watched the goofy music videos from the Killer Barbies (yes, they're real but good luck finding their CDs).

I'm such a sucker... Just consider this a warning.
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post #2 of 9
9/23/02 at 5:35am
Find Franco's Barbed Wire Dolls: the only Franco film really worth seeing (although he did allegedly direct the battle scenes in Welles' Chimes at Midnight that many critics call the most masterfull scenes in the picture - go figure!)

A kind of bargin basement, sleaze-filled version of the already quite base Caged Heat from Jonathan Demme, BWD has a truly hilarious flashback in slow motion where the heroine gets herself banged up by killin' her abusive Pa. Trouble is, Franco couldn't afford the extra film it would have cost to overcrank the camera more than the standard 24 fps that would facilitate slow motion so the whole 5 minute scene is acted in slow motion rather like a spastic mime...

...but aside from that, true, a quite rancid filmography peppered with the odd inspired exploitation highlight (Klaus Kinski as Jack the Ripper, Franco himself as mad priest in Exorcism/Demoniac/Sadist of Notre Dame) that even fails to titilate much like somehat comparable Linnea Quigley/Michelle Bauer trash of America's glorious exploitation era a few years later...One wonders what Olin Ray and those sorority babes from that slime ball bowl-a-rama would have made of "rock chicks on the road" horror !
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post #3 of 9
9/23/02 at 7:54am
If I may...

HA! I told you so!
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post #4 of 9
9/23/02 at 8:33am
It's ironic that you bring this up because just last night while I saw searching for a movie on IMDB, I stumbled upon a listing for a movie called "Killer Barbys vs. Dracula" which was said to be in post-production. I didn't even realize it was a sequel until I clicked on this thread. Well, from the sounds of things, it will be hard for it to be worse than the original.

But is the original worse than "Fangs?" Now that would be hard to top.

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<a href="http://www.badmovies.net" target="_blank">BADMOVIES.NET - The Latest News In The World Of Schlock Cinema</a>
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post #5 of 9
9/23/02 at 11:40am
The Awful Dr. Orloff is really the only watchable movie Franco has ever made. I think the guy's made over a thousand movies by now.
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post #6 of 9
9/23/02 at 11:53am
The terms "Jess Franco" and "watchable movie" do not go together IMO.
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post #7 of 9
9/23/02 at 11:53am
and has a thousand pseudonyms !

Well not quite that many but enough - rivaled only by Aristide Massaccesi in that dept:

Joan Almirall
Rosa Maria Almirall
Rosa María Almirall
Clifford Brown Jr.
Clifford Brown
Juan G. Cabral
Betty Carter
Terry De Corsia
Candy Coster
Chuck Evans
Dennis Farnon
Jess Franco
Jesús Franco
Jesús Franco-Manera
Adolf M. Frank
Jeff Frank
Jess Frank
Wolfgang Frank
James Gardner
Manfred Gregor
Jack Griffin
Robert Griffin
Lennie Hayden
Frank Hollman
Frank Hollmann
B.F. Johnson
J.P. Johnson
James Lee Johnson
James P. Johnson
David J. Khune
David Khune
D. Khunne Jr.
D. Khunne
David Khunne
David Kuhne
David Kunne
Lulu Laverne
Lulú Laverne
Marius Lesoeur
Franco Manera
J. Franck Manera
Jesús Franco Manera
Jesús Manera
Roland Marceignac
A.L. Mariaux
A.L. Marioux
Tawer Nero
John O'Hara
Preston Quaid
P. Querut
Dan L. Simon
Dan Simon
Dave Tough
Pablo Villa
Joan Vincent
Daniel J. White
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post #8 of 9
9/23/02 at 12:04pm
Quote:
B.F. Johnson
Surely not...?
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post #9 of 9
9/23/02 at 12:31pm
Joan Vincent and Candy Coster are the two that get me...
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