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Detroit woman not winning any "mom of the year" awards

post #1 of 26
2/6/09 at 5:21pm
Thread Starter 
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/29021639/

So glad everybody can breed!
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post #2 of 26
2/6/09 at 5:27pm
What the fuck is a matter with detroit...?

-Frozen Corpses
-Asian Gangs in Gran Torino
-The Detroit Lions
-Eminem
-Kid Rock
-Narc

Maybe the entire city should be leveled and started from scratch.
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post #3 of 26
2/6/09 at 5:29pm
I would treat her just like Kurtwood Smith had his way with Peter Wellers when he was still human in Robocop. Except I wouldn't shoot the bitch in the head.
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post #4 of 26
2/6/09 at 5:30pm
I'm pretty sure: "Mom cooks me like a turkey in the oven. She gives me the boo boo in the eyes." is the worst thing I've ever heard. But also kind of funny.
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post #5 of 26
2/6/09 at 5:31pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rourkefan View Post
What the fuck is a matter with detroit...?

-Frozen Corpses
-Asian Gangs in Gran Torino
-The Detroit Lions
-Eminem
-Kid Rock
-Narc

Maybe the entire city should be leveled and started from scratch.
I say we take off and nuke the entire site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.
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post #6 of 26
2/6/09 at 5:32pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rourkefan View Post
Maybe the entire city should be leveled and started from scratch.
Maybe???
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post #7 of 26
2/6/09 at 5:33pm
"...the boo boos in the eyes..." will haunt my dreams.

(Damn you, Bailey!)
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post #8 of 26
2/6/09 at 5:43pm
What's wrong with the husband???
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post #9 of 26
2/6/09 at 5:47pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by ElCapitanAmerica View Post
What's wrong with the husband???
Forget it, ElCapitanAmerica. It's Detroit.
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post #10 of 26
2/6/09 at 5:51pm
omigod i'm so outraged let me express my outrage on the internet so everybody knows how outraged i am.
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post #11 of 26
2/6/09 at 5:54pm
What do you expect us to do: Go to Detroit and try to make it a better place?

We don't want to get killed
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post #12 of 26
2/6/09 at 5:56pm
I'm outraged at the lack of outrage. The thread is mostly people laughing.
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post #13 of 26
2/6/09 at 5:57pm
You guys could at least get busy on some funny 'boo boo in the eyes' gifs.
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post #14 of 26
2/6/09 at 6:03pm
'Delta City' sounds SOOO much nicer.
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post #15 of 26
2/6/09 at 7:05pm
You guys should have read the whole thing:

Quote:
The child, recent reports indicate, was simply alluding to a scene from the recent film "Slumdog Millionaire" regarding a singing beggar and his gangster guardian. "Maman [the gangster character, played by Ankur Vikal] gave me boo-boos in the eyes," the boy said, referring to the fact that blind singers earn three times the charity, according to the film.
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post #16 of 26
2/6/09 at 7:40pm
These reports have now convinced me I could easily take over the city of Detroit in a very cost-effective fashion. A small, crack team of mercenaries perhaps. Maybe 500,000 at the max. Hans Gruber spent more on his suits.

It's always been a dream of mine to create my own personal fiefdom. I don't think I could do any worse really. All I ask is total and unquestioning subservience to me for the rest of my days by the people of Detroit. Could I be any worse?
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post #17 of 26
2/6/09 at 7:51pm
Hmm. Your ideas are intriguing to me and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.
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post #18 of 26
2/6/09 at 7:57pm
Bancroft, Left 4 Dead: Detroit Edition? They're not zombies, but damn if they aren't close.
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post #19 of 26
2/6/09 at 8:06pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jacob Singer View Post
Hmm. Your ideas are intriguing to me and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.
Certainly. Please send all checks and money orders to Bancroft Agee, Overlord and Master c/o The Cobra Terrordome.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Doc Happenin View Post
Bancroft, Left 4 Dead: Detroit Edition? They're not zombies, but damn if they aren't close.
Anybody that would still go to Lions' games would have to be classified as braindead.


If there ever was a major American city primed for massive social revolution and upheaval it's Detroit. Fuck Robocop, they need a Zapata.

I have family in Michigan, my grandfather worked on the line at Ford for a time (he helped build the Edsel but let's not hold that against him) and I know their are still good people in that town. It really is depressing to keep hearing and reading these horror stories.
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post #20 of 26
2/6/09 at 8:22pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Phil View Post
I'm outraged at the lack of outrage. The thread is mostly people laughing.
I didn't get a "Harumph" from this guy.
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post #21 of 26
2/6/09 at 8:35pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Certainly. Please send all checks and money orders to Bancroft Agee, Overlord and Master c/o The Cobra Terrordome.
No personal checks accepted. Ammunition welcome.

Quote:
If there ever was a major American city primed for massive social revolution and upheaval it's Detroit. Fuck Robocop, they need a Zapata.
Wait, aren't they in the midst of social revolution and upheaval, but without any of the charm normally associated with it?

Quote:
I know their are still good people in that town.
Pics or it didn't happen.
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post #22 of 26
2/6/09 at 8:43pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bailey View Post
I'm pretty sure: "Mom cooks me like a turkey in the oven. She gives me the boo boo in the eyes." is the worst thing I've ever heard. But also kind of funny.
I thought it was a Down Syndrome Vampire quote at first.
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post #23 of 26
2/6/09 at 10:10pm
The trick is to cook the kid upside down. That way the breast doesn't dry out.
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post #24 of 26
2/6/09 at 11:47pm
I would understand this if the family were working on the set of a major motion picture. It's well known that these kind of things happen all the time in Hollywood due to the stress and charged emotional environment!

That scene in Hannibal where Anthony Hopkins ate Ray Liotta's living brain? Weren't no FX kids!
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post #25 of 26
2/7/09 at 1:42am
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cylon Baby View Post
I would understand this if the family were working on the set of a major motion picture. It's well known that these kind of things happen all the time in Hollywood due to the stress and charged emotional environment!

That scene in Hannibal where Anthony Hopkins ate Ray Liotta's living brain? Weren't no FX kids!
But they have teh talent! You have no concepcion of how hard it is for teh actors and the gnusies! We must all forgive them, because they are teh gr8test.
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post #26 of 26
2/9/09 at 8:43am
Can't really get worked up about this story, as far worse things than that happen here. Everyday.
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CHUD.com Community › Forums › CULTURE, HUMOR, & FREE FORM › Misc. Culture › Detroit woman not winning any "mom of the year" awards