Gash Wednesday, The Blog of Andrea Rothe - Page 6

Powerful stuff Andrea.

Damn. That had to be hard to write, but thank you for writing it.

I was a little puzzled by this whole thing, because I remember Devin posting the "Replace your photo with your favorite cartoon character" two weeks prior to all this, with no sign at all of it being anything but a fun diversion. Don't quite know how it got started up again with the child abuse angle attached.

Andrea, that was very raw, and very brave of you to share it. Kudos.

Andrea,

For what it's worth, I am so, so sorry. I literally broke down as I read this blog, mainly because I also suffered abuse in my family - along with my brother and sister - for most of my childhood. A lot of what you mentioned brought back so many things I had buried for so long. Unfortunately, I was too scared and felt like I was too weak to even cobble together anything resembling an escape plan - even if it was just to help me get through it. I was also unfortunate to have lived close enough to a college I could commute to, and I had no choice but to continue to live at home while I went to college. You can bet I made up as many excuses as I could to stay there as late as possible every day. It wasn't until I turned 19 that I was finally able to stand up to my father, and it was simply out of the fact that I just couldn't take it anymore. After that, I left home and stayed with a friend's family for a few months until I joined the Air Force.

I want to thank you so much for posting this. For the first time in a long time I don't feel alone in what I went through. When I said I broke down while reading this, it wasn't because it dredged up painful memories. It was because I didn't feel alone anymore. I also appreciate the link you posted the other day on Facebook. I tried to spread it across FB myself after you posted it. You're absolutely right - more needs to be done.

This will probably sound stupid and ridiculous, and I deeply apologize if I offend as we hardly know each other, but I wanted you to know that if you ever need anyone to talk to, I would be honoured to listen.

Thank you again.

Wow had to stop a couple of times reading this one, Andrea, really overwhelming stuff. I was never at all abused as a child, but I'm aware of what a lasting affect even well meaning but a little off parenting can have on things like self esteem well into later life, so I thought it was important to re-enforce what a good, fine, talented inspirational person you have become. I know that wasn't something you were fishing for, but it felt like it needed to be said.

I'm also going to make sure your words here weren't wasted and do something actual today.

Lady, you are a brave one. Very brave. As Eileen said, powerful stuff.

This is one those times when words don't seem enough but my heart goes out to both you and Donnie.

Powerfull stuff Andrea, like the others have said it took a lot of guts to post that.

That was incredible to read Andrea. Thanks for sharing.

Whoa, guys. Thank you all for the support. No, not easy to write. I kept trying to walk away from the table and pace the kitchen and I kept making myself sit back down and add more so it didn't become an abandoned blog post on my hard drive.

Really hoping more can get involved somehow. I found out about the My Stuff Bags charity over the weekend and I just cried and cried. And then I donated, and I'm going to continue to do so and probably make some blankets. That is such a valuable thing they are doing. Those kids very nearly get scooped out of the frying pan and dropped in the fire for a while. I love very much the idea of them having a blanket and stuffed animal to comfort themselves with at the beginning of another tough journey.

Here are other charities and organizations that deal with children in peril as well. Here's a list by state. I don't know about internationally though.

I don't really know what to say, but I have to echo what others have said. That was very powerful, and gutsy. Thank you for sharing.

http://www.childmatters.org.nz/

for when Bucho shows up

It's important to support people when they're going through hell. Thanks for using your past experiences to positively affect the lives of those around you.

Thanks for sharing that with us. As Don mentioned, the greatest gift you can give someone is to let them know they aren't alone. I posted your link on my Facebook page and encouraged them to share. Fuck people who rail against "awareness" campaigns. Change can't happen with out it.

I know it must sound very hollow coming from someone on the other side of the world, but that was an incredible piece, Andrea. Utterly heartbreaking and astonishingly brave.

I wasn't familiar with My Stuff Bag but will do what I can to support it.
There are various charities in the UK that do similar work, the NSPCC and Barnados for example.

Dang, people... thank you again for all of your support! Sharing the story and helping the cause are all anyone can do.

Here's a new one!

http://chud.com/articles/blogs/3110/...ty-hidden.html

This entry kinda speaks to me personally. It could just be because I actually use the word mediocrity in the bio for my blog. But to be fair, it's only stated in the context of humour. I certainly stand by and back up every thing I write. In fact, some times I'm quite proud of my work. Any self-deprecation I play into is purely for fun and humour. I've always enjoyed writers who could dabble in self-deprecation and prove they kick ass as writers at the same time. Dave Barry is a good example. I found it inspirational that you can pick fun at yourself but strive above it at the same time. That's something I've always wanted to emulate. To me it shows its own confidence - that you are completely at ease with having your work downplayed for the sake of humour, since at the same time your work speaks for itself.

You make great points, though, and it makes me rethink if maybe what I think I'm doing and what it comes across as might be two different things.

Great read as always, Andrea!

On behalf of all your British fans I must inform you that we are gentically programmed to offer up any endevour with a side of "I'm not sure sure if you'll like this", "This is bit naff but..." or "I'd love to help but I'm not sure how much help I'll be".

I can assure you that within our hearts roars a fire of confidence that could power the Earth, but our social conditioning won't allow us to offer anything more exciting than "I'm actually quite proud of this, but don't worry if you're busy..."

Don't give up on us...

ETA On a serious note Don just articulated perfectly how I feel on the subject.

Good point!

Staying confident and positive helps when you talk about the work your doing. I like to tell people about important achievements that have a big impact. It keeps the conversation interesting and the listener engaged.

Fuck mediocrity and negativity. There's not enough time in the day for that shit.

Mike and his pants speak the Truth Great Blog.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Imposter_syndrome

(I point it out to maybe explain the impulse in others; I'm sure I'm terrible.)

Also, Helen Keller was fucking awesome. I blame all the jokes in grade school for clouding that fact.

There are also such fun syndromes as http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tall_poppy_syndrome

I think there's a fear of failing for the first time, that gets people, I used to be much more preemptively undercutive (<--new word, I know it's not very good, but it's my first attempt at creating one) of my writing before I'd had a few legitimate failures, where you're sitting in a theater full of people not laughing at all your jokes and gags, it feels horrible at the time, but you learn from it that life goes on and you can just do better next time, and the worst of it doesn't last that long. So that after a few disappointment you're not so worried about it happening, because you know it's not the end of the world.

You tend to get it in the more outside of the norm professions, because you get a sort of backlash from some people when you try and achieve something that's outside of what they've tried to do. "the whole "Get a real job" mentality where getting noticed is a bad thing, and I think a lot of creative types take that on board too much and are almost apologetic for trying something artistic that by it's nature is meant to draw attention.

on the procrastination side of things, That has more to do with, if someone has had a tendency to not get shit finished in the past I guess them bringing it up before they commit to something is a way of avoiding responsibility, They don't want to let people down, but if they do they don't want it to be their fault, "I told you I probably wouldn't get it done from the start, so how can you be disappointed?"

Good read! But --

I must say, this doesn't only apply to the British. I often fall into the use of self-deprecating comments on my blog, but it all comes from a twisted, self-deprecating sense of humor that's read differently depending on location and culture, and that has always gotten me in trouble at home, but was well received when I attended university abroad.

Sometimes, self-deprecation is just about not taking yourself too seriously.

#60 is very moving and sobering Andrea and I applaud your courage for standing up and shining your own light into this very dark area of our societies. In New Zealand we have a shameful record when it comes to child abuse - one of the worst in the developed world in fact - and I have donated to the very organisation pointed to by our buddy Horrid.

Oh my gosh! I love to hear it! High-five, sir.

Horrid, thanks for looking that up.

That's awesome Bucho, I actually thought it was a little rude of me to single you out like that, at the time I was only naming you because you were the only NZer that posts in this thread, then I was like "ooh that was pretty presumptuous" but glad some good came of it.

Waaaaaaaaaaait a minute. Why does the details section of my credit card receipt say Flaccid Meat Inc instead of Child Matters?

I started reading your blog with #60 per the near-radiological praise it was getting in the Best of 2010 thread. Can't add much to what's been said about it already, but thanks for writing it.

I decided to follow it up with another entry, presuming (correctly) that it would be lighter fare. A few hours later I wondered what the hell else I had planned on doing last night. I'll never look at a sea of blue the same way again (that paragraph is one of the coolest* things I've read all year). You've earned a reader.

*see what i did there?

Just put up a  new one. Kinda short and sweet. Enjoy, folks!

 

http://www.chud.com/31754/gash-wednesday-making-shrines/

Great blog, it touched on something I was forced to evaluate last year myself, just what I wanted out of life. I think the goals you have now are far better and more worthly than being in a fashion mag.

 

Good Stuff.

New Gash Wednesday is up! Thanks for reading, those that do.

 

http://www.chud.com/34617/gash-wednesday-63-exploding-blubber/

Awesome as always. I love hearing stories like these, they make your blog far more interesting than the average "nerd" blog.

Great read, Andrea.  You do a really amazing job of bringing people into your world and life with the way you write.

As always Andrea great read. And I have now caught up on all your old blogs. So keep em coming.

Awww, I love you guys! I cannot believe that people are now getting to enjoy reading through the little pieces of my life. It kills me.

 

The newest is up! http://www.chud.com/36169/gash-wednesday-64-honeybun-freedom/

I know this exact freedom you speak of!  When my dad and I had a falling out and I got kicked out of the house, I had to drop out of college and join the Air Force so I could continue to pay for college.  Once I was out of that house, it was always the little freedoms that meant so much - being able to have my own bag of Chips Ahoy cookies (the ones at home were for dad only), the sheer variety of food in the chow hall or even being able to eat out more often (we were poor and lived in a trailer park, so there were a lot of days of ramen and mac & cheese).  Even just the ability to go out and see a movie on my own in a theater meant so much.

 

Thank you for sharing, Andrea!

Great read as always. I to came from a very poor background and the chance to choose my own food (once I began working was great.)   To this day I can remeber the first time I ate a steak, you are very right, it's the simple things that can make us happy.

You like cauliflower and brussel sprouts? What a freak.

 

Also, I think you're the first American I've ever heard use the word "grand" in that very British way. Well played.

 

Speaking of which, this continual, "absurd" autobiography is grand. It's splendid. It's one of them privileges you're talking about, both for you and for us who read it. It's a goddamn ray of light. What's actually absurd is the notion that your writing could be any kind of running joke among your friends.

 

Keep 'em comin'.

Thank you, Bucho, Ken, and Don!

 

Just put up the newest! Enjoy!

 

 

http://www.chud.com/39145/gash-wednesday-65-my-nod-to-the-onion/

Another great entry.  I have not heard of that theroy before but it makes a lot of sense.  many a time I find myself argruing like a petulant child for no goof reason so I totally get what your saying.

Wow.  That was incredible, Andrea.  Once again you put into words the perfect explanations for internal struggles I've been dealing with for years.  This entry really clarified a lot of things for me.  Thank you!

http://www.chud.com/40707/gash-wednesday-66-five-simple-things/

 

Another blog happened. I can't see this blowing anyone's dick off, but now you get to see what I turn into fetish material.

I'm a big fan of your writing Andrea, you've got a really interesting story to tell.

I agree whole heartedly. That was a beautiful read, honestly theraputic. Six thumbs up!