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I want citizenship in the Grilled Nation, DAMN YOU KFC!!!

post #1 of 7
Thread Starter 
http://www.nationalpost.com/news/story.html?id=2147862

KFC 'colonel' dupes UN security

Quote:
UNITED NATIONS -- Red-faced United Nations officials on Monday admitted to a major security lapse after a UN guard helped Kentucky Fried Chicken's "Colonel Sanders" gain access to restricted areas.

The guard escorted the white-suited intruder past security barriers, where he got a handshake from the UN General Assembly president, Dr. Ali A. Treki of Libya.

The faux fast food chain founder also posed for a picture beneath the assembly's giant UN logo, which overlooks the spot where world leaders address their international counterparts.

"It should not have happened -- that I will stress, and very strongly," said Michele Montas, spokeswoman for UN Secretary General Ban Ki-moon.

"There was some lapse in security and the individual in question . . . was, on the initiative of one security guard, taken . . . into the UN."

The real Harland "Colonel" Sanders typically wore a white suit and string bow tie, but he has been dead since 1980.

Ms. Montas said security officials, many of whom are brought in from overseas, were "still trying to find out exactly what happened."

The incident last Thursday apparently was part of a publicity stunt by the fast food chain, which is seeking to promote its grilled alternative to its signature fried chicken. It had dispatched the Sanders look-alike, identified by KFC as Robert Thompson, and also wrote to Mr. Ban.

Ms. Montas warned the UN could take legal action against the company, whose letter, signed by KFC president Roger Eaton, asked that the secretary general register the "Grilled Nation" of grilled chicken eaters as the 193rd UN member state.

"That letter is absolutely void to us; it has no meaning whatsoever," Ms. Montas said. "The UN cannot be involved in a commercial venture. Period. This is being touched upon by our legal department."

Mr. Treki, who introduced world leaders at the recent General Assembly summit, posed with the Sanders look-alike in a lounge area frequented by diplomats and government leaders.

"I wouldn't call that a meeting," bristled Jean-Victor Nkolo, Mr. Treki's spokesman after a reporter asked if he could confirm the two had "met."

"There was no meeting. No appointment scheduled with the actor impersonating Colonel Sanders . . . there was a brief encounter with the president of the General Assembly."

Mr. Nkolo said Mr. Treki shook the impersonator's hand because "he's a very polite man."

UN TV crews eventually raised the alarm after being stunned when the impersonator approached cameras set up for diplomats, and began making claims about the extent of the "Grilled Nation." At that point, additional security guards arrived and escorted him from the building.
post #2 of 7
Brilliant. Kudos to the impersonator for being willing to take the risk of being arrested or shot by the blue berets.

Clearly the UN is being made fools of, but with that kind of material to work with, it can't be that much of a challenge.

I'm just waiting for Captain Scarlett to make their way into the UN Security Council to warn them of the Mysteroid menace.
post #3 of 7
I'm racist against people with grill marks.
post #4 of 7
Am I the only one who finds it mind numbingly retarded that that loser actually had to SAY the letter from KFC about the grilled nation is "absolutely void to us?" Please tell me that a person responsible for a leadership position in what we all hope will evolve (over many milennia, I'll grant) into the United Federation of Planets didn't actually think the petition was serious.
post #5 of 7
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jake View Post
I'm racist against people with grill marks.
Goddam grillies comin' over here from Grillandia and takin' jobs from us fried Americans! Wish they'd all go back where they came from!
post #6 of 7
Quote:
Originally Posted by IggytheBorg View Post
Goddam grillies comin' over here from Grillandia and takin' jobs from us fried Americans! Wish they'd all go back where they came from!
They took yer job!!!

Nice to see UN security on top of things. Haven't seen such a fine job of bodyguardin' since the days of Lee Harvey Oswald.
post #7 of 7
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr Vivisector View Post
Brilliant. Kudos to the impersonator for being willing to take the risk of being arrested or shot by the blue berets.
Haven't you seen Hotel Rwanda? The U.N. isn't allowed to shoot at anything.
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CHUD.com Community › Forums › CULTURE, HUMOR, & FREE FORM › Misc. Culture › I want citizenship in the Grilled Nation, DAMN YOU KFC!!!