I'm not really an addict of any kind, I but have had my life deeply affected by one. After 14 years of sobriety starting when I was six months old, my father became addicted to prescription narcotics and quickly moved on to heroin. Needless to say, it was a pretty dark period in my life. The hardest part was watching my dad, the person I loved most in the world, become a total stranger. It's taken me a long time to reconcile with that. While I was in college and grad school we'd go for months without talking, partly because he was busy hitting rock bottom and partly because I had temporarily lost my capacity to give a shit. I tried going to Al Anon and going to a group for Adult Children of Alcoholics, but my experiences seemed so different from the people there that I never felt comfortable and stopped going.
To make a reeeeally long story short, I decided to suck up all of my anger and hurt and feelings of betrayal and focus on the fact that this man is the only father I'm ever going to have. Now I see him every Sunday. I drive him to the methadone clinic and then we go out for breakfast. I think knowing that he has me to rely on has helped him a lot in his recovery, and to be honest, it's helped me a lot in mine. It's a step toward making up for the helplessness I felt as a teenager.
To make a reeeeally long story short, I decided to suck up all of my anger and hurt and feelings of betrayal and focus on the fact that this man is the only father I'm ever going to have. Now I see him every Sunday. I drive him to the methadone clinic and then we go out for breakfast. I think knowing that he has me to rely on has helped him a lot in his recovery, and to be honest, it's helped me a lot in mine. It's a step toward making up for the helplessness I felt as a teenager.
