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Can someone please explain to me...

post #1 of 129
3/23/10 at 8:42am
Thread Starter 
...who this person is exactly?



...and why I'm meant to care? She's seemingly everywhere all of a sudden and she seems to be utterly talentless. I guess I'm getting old but I honestly don't get it.

She's done a song with these 3oh!3 douchebags and I can't work out why any of them are famous. People like to laugh at acts like Brokencyde, but I see quite literally zero difference between them and the acts mainstream american pop seems to want to insist are somehow relevant or important these days.

Little help? Am I missing something or are all these acts just fucking awful? Like, genocide awful?
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post #2 of 129
3/23/10 at 8:45am
You know that episode of BUFFY with the guy made up entirely of worms?

She's like that, but composed of STDs.
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post #3 of 129
3/23/10 at 9:40am
OK, you'll have to back up and explain to a rapidly aging old man who that actually *is*. Is it that "hard drinking, hard partying" chick that did a song on American Idol last week whose name I can't remember? If it is, she was like the bastard child of Lita Ford and the Buggles. But I can't remember her freaking name.
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post #4 of 129
3/23/10 at 10:13am
Kesha.

And no, I didn't forget the dollar sign. I'm simply not going there.
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post #5 of 129
3/23/10 at 11:01am
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Rain Dog View Post


If you didn't live so far away I'd declare a blood feud. For now I'll settle for a stern fist shake in your general direction.
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post #6 of 129
3/23/10 at 11:07am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dave Jarvie View Post
If you didn't live so far away I'd declare a blood feud. For now I'll settle for a stern fist shake in your general direction.
Aww, was that your first exposure to Brokencyde? It's always such a special day. Like your first horrible car crash, or when you first come to grips with the death of a pet. You'll remember today, Dave, you'll remember.
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post #7 of 129
3/23/10 at 11:11am
All I know is she brushes her teeth with a bottle of Jack. That and she butchered Radiohead's "Karma" at a school talent show when she was 13.
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post #8 of 129
3/23/10 at 11:16am
Becoming an old fart and loosing touch with pop culture surely doesn´t seem so bad now.
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post #9 of 129
3/23/10 at 11:20am
Ahh, Rain Dog, I see you have met my nemesis. We have fought many battles for my sanity but all my victories have so far been proven temporary. But one day I will triumph once and for all. The clock is ticking towards her inexorable destruction.
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post #10 of 129
3/23/10 at 11:28am
Quote:
Originally Posted by stelios View Post
The clock is ticking towards her inexorable destruction.
TiK ToK
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post #11 of 129
3/23/10 at 11:42am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Diva View Post
This is just fuel for the fire of my hate. A fire that will harden my armaments of justice. And so, by her own villainy she will be undone.
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post #12 of 129
3/23/10 at 11:44am
I've seen her name pop up (dollar sign and all), and I don't think I've heard any of her music yet (and if I have it was in a club or bar where I didn't inquire about whose song it was). This is the first time I've seen what she looks like.

I'm a pretty forgiving typical red blooded male, and I probably wouldn't have such a reaction as I am having now if I was confronted with a full body shot and not just her face.

Fucking. gross.
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post #13 of 129
3/23/10 at 11:55am
it's like lady gaga got raped by a landfill
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post #14 of 129
3/23/10 at 12:01pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Rain Dog View Post
...who this person is exactly?
Jesus, RD, give us a Two Girls One Cup-type warning on that thing. Yeesh.
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post #15 of 129
3/23/10 at 12:07pm
That's a bad picture. She actually is kind of sexy in a couldn't-pick-her-out-of-a-lineup kind of way.

Her music, on the other hand, is cancer of the ear-AIDS.
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post #16 of 129
3/23/10 at 12:13pm
At least she's a Return to Oz fan.
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post #17 of 129
3/23/10 at 12:23pm
I was about to say that this can't be how she looks all the time, even if she looks like her music sounds.
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post #18 of 129
3/23/10 at 1:14pm
I may have seen DaveB's liberate a chunk of "TiK ToK" for their own ends at their last show. It may have been performed by a 6'3" PhD student in a drag getup that made him look weirdly like Rhianna.

It may have been awesome. Esp. when it segued into Lil Mama's "Lip Gloss" mashed with Metallica's "One."

What I'm trying to say here is that, in the right context, these things have a glorious, glorious purpose.
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post #19 of 129
3/23/10 at 1:20pm
OMG! I need video stat!
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post #20 of 129
3/23/10 at 1:22pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissZooey View Post
I may have seen DaveB's liberate a chunk of "TiK ToK" for their own ends at their last show. It may have been performed by a 6'3" PhD student in a drag getup that made him look weirdly like Rhianna.

It may have been awesome. Esp. when it segued into Lil Mama's "Lip Gloss" mashed with Metallica's "One."

What I'm trying to say here is that, in the right context, these things have a glorious, glorious purpose.
yeah you can't tease something like this and not deliver video come on
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post #21 of 129
3/23/10 at 1:28pm
There is no video that's publicly available.

Go bother DaveB about it.
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post #22 of 129
3/23/10 at 1:29pm
What is this teasing? You should be ashamed of yourself. You know that everyone that has read this has already started visualizing elaborate Moulin Rouge inspired musical numbers staring DaveB.

At least I hope they have...
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post #23 of 129
3/23/10 at 1:32pm
A skinny ginger white girl mewling "wake up in the morning feeling like P Diddy" has got to be the most hilariously contrived lyric since R. Kelly espoused the sexual pleasures of Angela Lansbury.
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post #24 of 129
3/23/10 at 1:34pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Andrew Merriweather View Post
A skinny ginger white girl mewling "wake up in the morning feeling like P Diddy" has got to be the most hilariously contrived lyric since R. Kelly espoused the sexual pleasures of Angela Lansbury.
That. Yes.
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post #25 of 129
3/23/10 at 1:44pm
What's with the digitizing of vocals these days? It's like scraping the chalk board with long finger nails.
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post #26 of 129
3/23/10 at 1:55pm
"Tik Tok" is like a fantasy for skanky girls. The day consists of pedicures on their toes (toes), trying on all their clothes (clothes), they don't have to pay for booze, and guys want to hang out with them because they have "swagger", not because they dress like total sluts.

Also, I need to start defriending people on Facebook who state they woke up this morning feeling like P. Diddy.
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post #27 of 129
3/23/10 at 1:56pm
"I woke up this morning feeling like P. Diddy shat in my head" is okay, though.
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post #28 of 129
3/23/10 at 2:00pm
ey gurl
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post #29 of 129
3/23/10 at 2:04pm
Let's be realists. How can you possibly make a song about partying a lot realistic?

Wake up in the morning and I can't even see straight. Crawl to the bathroom and puke my guts out. What is this place I woke up in? Why does my asshole hurt? Will I ever stop puking? Oh shit where are my clothes? I must find them. Help, I can't get up.

Doesn't really roll off the tongue, does it?

Edit: I'd like to add that I don't think that the chain of events I mentioned is wholly bad.
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post #30 of 129
3/23/10 at 2:07pm
I like that interview, shes all fucked up and trying to talk about her Nashville roots.
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post #31 of 129
3/23/10 at 2:09pm
"Christ My Nose Is Bleeding Nonstop And My Checking Account Is Overdrafted, When Did I Buy Pizza" will be listed on the NOW 2015 compilation.
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post #32 of 129
3/23/10 at 2:09pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by stelios View Post
Doesn't really roll off the tongue, does it?
That's because it doesn't rhyme.
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post #33 of 129
3/23/10 at 2:45pm
She's repugnant and will be gone soon, God willing.
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post #34 of 129
3/23/10 at 2:52pm
In her defense, she does the chorus to Right Round, which is still a good song.
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post #35 of 129
3/23/10 at 3:05pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by stelios View Post
Let's be realists. How can you possibly make a song about partying a lot realistic?

Wake up in the morning and I can't even see straight. Crawl to the bathroom and puke my guts out. What is this place I woke up in? Why does my asshole hurt? Will I ever stop puking? Oh shit where are my clothes? I must find them. Help, I can't get up.

Doesn't really roll off the tongue, does it?

Edit: I'd like to add that I don't think that the chain of events I mentioned is wholly bad.
Atmosphere made a pretty damn good song out of it
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post #36 of 129
3/23/10 at 3:45pm
Never heard one note by her. But I would make sweaty love to her until I bled out my penis. Life is for livin', gentlemen.

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post #37 of 129
3/23/10 at 3:48pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Phil View Post
Never heard one note by her. But I would make sweaty love to her until I bled out my penis.
Well, yeah.
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post #38 of 129
3/23/10 at 4:00pm


She can be good looking in some photos ... but her face can be "off"
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post #39 of 129
3/23/10 at 4:02pm
man if I had a dollar for every woman I slept with whose face was "off" I'd have three or four dollars
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post #40 of 129
3/23/10 at 4:02pm
The party don't start till I walk in... to her vagina.
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post #41 of 129
3/23/10 at 4:09pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr. Freeze View Post
She can be good looking in some photos ... but her face can be "off"
Yeah, but you wouldn't be fucking a photo... Er, nevermind.
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post #42 of 129
3/23/10 at 5:35pm
Shit... oh, so she's the tick-tock girl (I see diva posted a link early on but i can't youtube from work). Finally I can place a face with that Symphonic Composition.

I dig the 8-bit sounds at the beginning, especially when I'm drunk.

The other pictures of her are a relief.... though is that some crazy-eye action going on in the beach pic?


That first picture is still a nightmare though.
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post #43 of 129
3/23/10 at 7:08pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by billylove View Post
Yeah, but you wouldn't be fucking a photo... Er, nevermind.
Exactly. I'd have to see her in person to see what she really looks like. Photos lie!
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post #44 of 129
3/23/10 at 7:11pm
I blame this goddamn thread. This song played not once, but TWICE while I was at the gym. Wanna know how I know? My headphones died after I accidentally ripped them in half doing high pulls.

THANKS A LOT, RAIN DOG.
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post #45 of 129
3/23/10 at 7:13pm
omgraindogrunroidrage!
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post #46 of 129
3/23/10 at 7:53pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr. Freeze View Post


She can be good looking in some photos ... but her face can be "off"
Wait, what?

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post #47 of 129
3/23/10 at 7:57pm
Ah could eat a Ke$%@#ha for hours.
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post #48 of 129
3/23/10 at 8:00pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jake View Post
Ah could eat a Ke$%@#ha for hours.
Its okay, you'd still shit it out in seconds.
You avatar still creeps me out more, though.
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post #49 of 129
3/23/10 at 8:09pm
Thread Starter 
Well this thread shifted into high geared deep fried gold. Thank you ladies and gentlemen.

Now, moving onto the other epic pop douchebags I mentioned above, 30h!3 or whatever their name is - where the hell have they come from?? Seemingly out of nowhere and suddenly they're doing songs with everyone - this Kesha character included, like some mentally handicaped middle class white version of Timbaland.



...and what are they? Rappers? Pop stars? fratboys douches that wandered into a music studio on a bender?

Aren't these two the exact kinda guys that would be spitroasting an inebriated and probably comatose Kesha at all the wild parties she sings about going to?

What the hell is going on with yank pop these days? It's like the people I hated at high school all have recording contracts. I've never been so happy to be getting old and on the other side of the world.
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post #50 of 129
3/23/10 at 8:13pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Rain Dog View Post
Well this thread shifted into high geared deep fried gold. Thank you ladies and gentlemen.

Now, moving onto the other epic pop douchebags I mentioned above, 30h!3 or whatever their name is - where the hell have they come from?? Seemingly out of nowhere and suddenly they're doing songs with everyone - this Kesha character included, like some mentally handicaped middle class white version of Timbaland.



...and what are they? Rappers? Pop stars? fratboys douches that wandered into a music studio on a bender?

Aren't these two the exact kinda guys that would be spitroasting an inebriated and probably comatose Kesha at all the wild parties she sings about going to?

What the hell is going on with yank pop these days? It's like the people I hated at high school all have recording contracts. I've never been so happy to be getting old and on the other side of the world.
Dude, if the Insane Clown Posse has devoted followers, anyone can.
And come on, not all continents can have Kylie being awesome and giving drill kicks.
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