The ontology of the mixed drink resides in its ability to make something that tastes awful more palatable. And so the best mixed drinks combine just the grossest shit into something surprisingly drinkable.
Because I respect the ontology of the mixed drink (and don't go for bullshit like zima or wine coolers), I'm partial to the gin and tonic. Not only does it cure malaria, the gin and tonic combines arguably the worst soda with arguably the worst hard alcohol--and yet the admixture somehow tastes better than either gin or tonic alone. Bombay Sapphire and Beefeater are my gins of choice; mix 50/50 and add a generous splash of lime.
The martini (and particularly the dirty martini) tastes awful--but its constituent ingredients are yet-worse unmixed. For this reason, the martini is another classic.
I don't know what's in kamikaze shots, but they get you drunk fast and taste pretty good.
The Irish car bomb is another great and culturally-insensitive beverage that I wanted to order in England but couldn't for obvious reasons. You take eight ounces of Guinness in a cup (preferably a red solo cup) and then drop in a full shot glass of Bailey's. This is kind of a next-level mixed drink because its drinkability is time-contigent: not only does this taste really good, it tastes better the faster you drink it (it curdles within seconds), thus encouraging you to drink more faster. It also prevents hangovers to the extent that it makes a lot of people vomit shortly after drinking it.
Due to the aforementioned cultural sensitivity surrounding the Irish car bomb, the non-beer beverage I ordered most in England (where they really know how to drink and also how to take ketamine) is red bull and vodka--colloquially known as "liquid cocaine" (which is stupid because you can easily dissolve cocaine in liquid and then that really is liquid cocaine). This is an equally next-level mixed drink because, while it tastes as shitty as you'd expect given its ingredients, it gets you drunk super fast and then every drink you have thereafter tastes better irrespective of composition. This is a great start to an amazing hangover. Miller brewing company attempted to capitalize on red bull and vodka's popularity by introducing a calorie-laden malt alternative, Sparks Plus. This, the grossest alcoholic energy drink (no small feat), was quickly pulled from the market after hipsters started drinking it.
The tequila shot is another fine beverage that resides on the periphery of the mixed drink spectrum (it mixes in your mouth). Tequila, lime, and salt all taste pretty bad on their own. But together--they also taste really bad. Tequila shots are kind of a masochistic communal activity, akin to shotgunning beers, any consumption of boxed wine, and straight shots of 151.
But really: the best drink is good whiskey.
