The 'Games that don't hold up' thread

Basically the opposite of ryoken's thread. What game was competent to great in its day, but is shit today?

My pick is Goldeneye. It was a game in the right place and the right time when millions of N64s were stuck with four controllers but with only Mario Kart and Starfox to play. Playing it today is a mess. The split-screen framerate makes multiplayer completely unplayable, the R-trigger aiming is really clunky and the AI, particularly Natalia, is a joke.

If I remember correctly, I think the Goldeneye remake is going to be using the same controls, which should make for a good laugh. I can't wait to see what a complete mess that game will be.

I expect to see a ton of N64/PS1 games in this thread.

Probably, but I agree with you. I never really got Half-Life 2. It really picks up towards the end, but there's lots of bits where the game does a poor job of telling you where to go next so you'll spend a good while awkwardly trying to jump over rubble hoping that the next part of the game is just yonder. I'll totally admit that the character of Alex was a complete and utter breakthrough.

The PSOne classics on PSN are filled with JRPGS and lightning-in-a-bottle new frontiers into 3D like Jumping Flash and Jet Moto. However, there's also stuff like the Resident Evil and Tomb Raider series. Those games are an absolute mess to attempt to play in 2010. Twisted Metal 2, as much as it pains me to say, isn't as fun as it was in its day.

I wish they'd put Colony Wars on PSN just to see how that holds up.

Thanks, Gray. I'll try and hunt down a copy.

Oh, and I'm disappointed in all of you. Cameron and I shit on Half-Life 2 and there wasn't a single angry post calling for blood. Shame on all of you.

Thought of a couple more. While people were going apeshit for games with pre-rendered CG visuals, Donkey Kong Country and Vectorman are actually pretty shallow, boring games. Diddy's Kong Quest is definitely an improvement, but the best thing about those games is the Jungle Japes theme. I'm still excited for Retro's remake.

DKC was a game that I liked as a kid, but I think I was young enough to buy all the hype. It's better than most mascot games of that era and even as a kid I could understand why it was better than something like Bubsy, but it wasn't until DKC 2 where they took that ball and ran with it. Never bothered with DKC3 but by then it just seemed like they gave up.

As for Half-Life 2, the game does do a solid job of getting you to the next set piece even though you could probably back track through a good chunk of the game, I do recall a few instances where I found out how to progress and I wasn't sure whether or not that was the way Valve wanted me to take or if it was a glitch. I don't like my hand to be held (blue floor arrows from Perfect Dark Zero says hi), but I don't want to die repeatedly by experimenting where to go next. I wish I could articulate this problem a bit better, but it's been a couple years since I last played it.

Oh, and the hoverboat sequences always felt like a competent but clumsy mod that made its way into the game.

I haven't bothered with the Episodes, but based on what I'm hearing should I skip Episode 1 and go right to 2? I have the Orange Box so it's more a matter of wasting time than money.

How does a game that was released a year ago not hold up by today's standards? Has there been a drastic change in game development trends in the past year I'm not aware of?

There's co-op?

I assure you I'm not ignorantly saying Half-Life would be better if there was 4-player co-op, but while Halo 3's single player is indeed turgid, if a friend texted me right now saying he and two others are playing Halo 3's campaign, I'd be game to join.

The first Halo definitely deserves to be in this thread. While I'm sure system link was a revelation for non-pc gamers, the single player was a slog. The Library is one of gaming's greatest examples of lazy level design. Say what you want about its predecessors, Bungie did improve the level design and the set pieces as the series went on.

I agree. For me, it probably belongs in a "games that are overrated" thread, but a game that doesn't hold up? Well okay, compared to what? I only played it once and that was in 2007. Shooters didn't progress all that much in those three years. There were indeed some parts that were legitimately great, but the overall experience kind of disappointed me. I do want to give the whole of The Orange Box another stab if I had more time to kill (Portal was probably my favorite game of that year).

Has anyone played Dark Forces recently? It's dirt cheap on Steam and PSN but I'm afraid it's just going to be a fugly game with a bunch of irritating environmental puzzles. You know, like Duke Nukem 3D.