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Prince declares the Internet ‘dead’

post #1 of 87
7/6/10 at 5:58pm
Thread Starter 
Indisputable musical genius sees big things ahead for daily newspapers

Quote:
The Time is now my new favorite band.

I am totally listening to "House Quake" on YouTube.

I will no longer come to blows defending the 1989 "Batman" soundtrack ... you know, the one that came in that awesome tin can CD holder?

In fact, I’ll be selling my collector’s pressing later today to make ends meet — but not on eBay, apparently — now that the thing I write about for money is officially over.

Prince, never a model of rational thought and probably richer than God anyway, totally declared the Internet “dead” in an interview published by a British newspaper on Monday. Like, "MTV" dead.

"At one time MTV was hip and suddenly it became outdated," he told the Mirror — that’s the same U.K. paper that will offer his 27th LP "20TEN" free to readers later this year. "Anyway, all these computers and digital gadgets are no good."

Never mind that the indisputable musical genius passed over the logical “television,” and instead chose “a channel on television,” to make his analogy.

Prince sees big things ahead for daily newspapers. (The town crier was totally bell-ranting about this the other day! "HEAR YEE! HEAR YEE! THE INTERNET BE DEAD!") Prince launched 2007’s "Planet Earth" via the Mirror as well.

Either that or Prince is still pissed about that baby on YouTube dancing to his barely audible "Let's Go Crazy." YouTube yanked the video in 2007 after receiving a takedown notice from Universal Music Publishing Group, reportedly at the artist’s behest.

The kid’s mom turned to the Electronic Frontier Foundation, and the digital advocacy group called " Shenanigans!" over Universal’s misuse of the Digital Millennium Copyright Act. Now that groundbreaking video is back on YouTube, where it cleared the way for all the "Single Ladies (Put A Ring on It)" babies of the today. But it’s only fair to point out that according to Universal, that baby shouldn’t take it personally.

"Prince believes it is wrong for YouTube, or any user-generated site, to appropriate his music without his consent,” Universal said in a statement released to ABC News at the time of the story. "That position has nothing to do with any particular video that uses his songs. It's simply a matter of principle.”

Whatever, Crazy Dude.

"This guy scours the Internet,'' a source told ABC News. "He's really intense about this stuff."

Indeed, the same year as the baby video incident, Prince stated his intentions to sue YouTube and eBay because they "are clearly able (to) filter porn and pedophile material but appear to choose not to filter out the unauthorized music and film content which is core to their business success." Dang, priorities.

Also under fire that year from the Prince Industrial Complex: Three of the biggest Prince fan sites— you know, sites formed by and for Prince fans — for breach of copyright. His lawyers demanded the sites remove photographs, images, lyrics, album covers and anything associated with Prince’s likeness.

This is no doubt when Prince got his first inkling that things were over for the Internet — as far as he was concerned anyway.

If "Planet Earth" didn’t work in 2007, "20TEN" will no doubt show those illegal-downloading netizens not to swipe tracks from rock’s royalty. They’ll have to wait until one of their brethren fork over the 45p (almost 70 cents in Yank money) necessary to get their hands on the free-with-paper opus and rip it the old-fashioned way.

Way to somewhat slightly slow down the folks who were going to steal you record anyway, Prince.

But wait!

Perhaps we’re reading this all wrong. Perhaps this is just Prince trying to get around reality on a technicality again. The Internet is completely over, but the global system of interconnected computers formerly known as the Internet, which Prince totally plans to dominate, is fresher than ever!
Nice to read that newspapers are making a comeback just because Prince says so.
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post #2 of 87
7/6/10 at 6:36pm
Prince hasn't been on speaking terms with reality for some time now. He's one of those people who should only open his mouth to make music.
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post #3 of 87
7/6/10 at 6:45pm
I don't know. If Prince said it, I tend to think it's true. The guy wrote "Computer Blue", for God's sake.
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post #4 of 87
7/6/10 at 6:46pm
This sounds more like a threat...like his latest concert will actually unleash a "Escape from LA" EMP weapn on the world or something like it.
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post #5 of 87
7/7/10 at 12:08am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mattioli View Post
I don't know. If Prince said it, I tend to think it's true. The guy wrote "Computer Blue", for God's sake.
Yeah, but that post-1999 bomb scenario never happened, so his abilities as a prophet are in question.
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post #6 of 87
7/7/10 at 12:21am
No, Greg, it happened, don't you see? We've all been dead for 10 years. Party over. Oops. Out of time.

Peter Buck once said his favorite story about Prince was that Prince only listened to his own music. Buck said he didn't know if it was true, but hoped it was, because it would be awesome. I agree.
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post #7 of 87
7/7/10 at 12:49am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chris Miller View Post
No, Greg, it happened, don't you see? We've all been dead for 10 years. Party over. Oops. Out of time.
You deserve a golf clap.
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post #8 of 87
7/7/10 at 10:34am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chris Miller View Post
Peter Buck once said his favorite story about Prince was that Prince only listened to his own music. Buck said he didn't know if it was true, but hoped it was, because it would be awesome. I agree.
The thing I don't like about this anecdote is that it implies that something could be NOT awesome about Prince. And that's so patently absurd as to be laughable. The guy wrote "Ronnie, Talk to Russia", for God's sake.
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post #9 of 87
7/7/10 at 10:47am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mattioli View Post
The thing I don't like about this anecdote is that it implies that something could be NOT awesome about Prince.
He goes back and forth for me. The best/worst Prince story I ever heard was when visiting the BBC on a study-abroad in London. According to the guys working there, when Prince visited he refused to walk up stairs or use any sort of elevator. Thus, if he ever needed to change floors, an employee would have to carry him up and down the stairway.

While that's a bit shitty, Prince could have easily made it awesome by simply bringing his own person whose sole job was to tote him around. That just sounds like something he'd have.
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post #10 of 87
7/7/10 at 11:26am
I briefly played in a band with a guy who had previously worked in some low-level position at Paisley Park Studios in the 90s. I can't remember if Prince was recording at the time or if the guy I knew was helping to run sound for one of Prince's occasional low-profile Minneapolis shows, but he had to shuttle Prince to a music store to pick up some minor piece of musical equipment.

At the register, the guy had to front Prince the money, because not only does Prince not carry around cash, Prince does not wear pants with pockets.

For the record, I don't care if he embellished this story or not. It's still awesome.
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post #11 of 87
7/7/10 at 11:36am
This guy totally agrees.

http://www.newsweek.com/1995/02/26/t...ernet-bah.html
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post #12 of 87
7/7/10 at 11:47am
Quote:
Originally Posted by jay f View Post
That is the greatest thing ever.
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post #13 of 87
7/7/10 at 12:08pm
Jesus, did George F. Will write that?
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post #14 of 87
7/7/10 at 12:12pm
Carma Electra once told a story during one of those E! True Hollywood Story things that she used to "sleep" very carefully in full on make up and hair because she had to be ready for Prince if he decided to show up, no matter what time in the night it was.

Also, re: DaveB's story. Come to think of it, I have never seen Prince wear pants with pockets. Ever. So weird.
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post #15 of 87
7/7/10 at 12:22pm
I know he's not well liked around here, but if you haven't heard Kevin Smith's story about his Paisley Park experience, you are really missing out. It is incredible.
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post #16 of 87
7/7/10 at 12:39pm
I was at one of his shows in high school and it really is an awesome story, possibly better than his Jon Peters story.
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post #17 of 87
7/7/10 at 1:20pm
Well goddammit Chris, do share.
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post #18 of 87
7/7/10 at 1:45pm
I can't get on youtube to grab the link at work, but if you google "kevin smith talks about prince" it's the first video that comes up.
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post #19 of 87
7/7/10 at 2:09pm
He's right about MTV, though.
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post #20 of 87
7/7/10 at 2:17pm
Kevin Smith's Prince story is amazing. I probably only prefer the Jon Peters story because I'm more into movies than I am into music.
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post #21 of 87
7/8/10 at 4:36pm
Clearly a statement from a man who has no clue about the subject on which he is speaking. I've never even heard a Prince song, so forgive me, but at this point I think it's more likely that Prince is dead.
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post #22 of 87
7/8/10 at 4:44pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Princess Kate View Post
I've never even heard a Prince song, so forgive me...
This is literally the saddest thing I have ever heard. All is forgiven. I... I just want to give you a big hug right now and tell you that it's all going to be all right.

Y'see, Princess, in this life, things are much harder than in the after world. In this life, you're on your own. Just remember one thing for me: if the elevator tries to bring you down, go crazy. M'kay?
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post #23 of 87
7/8/10 at 4:56pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mattioli View Post
This is literally the saddest thing I have ever heard. All is forgiven. I... I just want to give you a big hug right now and tell you that it's all going to be all right
Y'see, Princess, in this life, things are much harder than in the after world. In this life, you're on your own. Just remember one thing for me: if the elevator tries to bring you down, go crazy. M'kay?
Aw, well thanks for the concern Mattioli. It's nice to know that people out there on the internet care about you. I don't feel too bad. He seems sort of like a ridiculous figure to me, from what I've learned about him over the years. I have not heard his music so I can't pass judgment on it, but with that said it doesn't sound like it would be for me
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post #24 of 87
7/8/10 at 4:59pm
You're right. It's all about non-smokers and Chi-Coms.
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post #25 of 87
7/8/10 at 5:12pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Princess Kate View Post
I've never even heard a Prince song
I'm sorry, but this is impossible unless you're under thirteen or have been in a coma for the last thirty years.
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post #26 of 87
7/8/10 at 5:15pm
You've never seen Burton's Batman?
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post #27 of 87
7/8/10 at 5:18pm
OK, I've heard the one in BATMAN and I'm sure that at some point in my life I heard a Prince song playing and didn't know it. I just don't know anything about the man or his music. He's before my time (my time commencing in July of 1986)
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post #28 of 87
7/8/10 at 5:36pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Princess Kate View Post
He's before my time (my time commencing in July of 1986)
Prince is timeless. Therefore, your assertion that he's before your time is deeply flawed.

I believe this has been conclusively demonstrated utilizing Aristotelian logic.
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post #29 of 87
7/8/10 at 5:38pm
I cannot understand the whole "It's before my time" defense. I guess nobody should be listening to Mozart anymore then.
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post #30 of 87
7/8/10 at 5:38pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mattioli View Post
Prince is timeless. Therefore, your assertion that he's before your time is deeply flawed.

I believe this has been conclusively demonstrated utilizing Aristotelian logic.
Fair enough, I don't dance in public so if he makes dance music it could still be timeless but just totally off my radar.
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post #31 of 87
7/8/10 at 5:39pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Greg David View Post
I cannot understand the whole "It's before my time" defense. I guess nobody should be listening to Mozart anymore then.
Prince seems to me to be emblematic of the 80s. I know Michael Jackson and have heard his music, but I don't enjoy it. Prince I know less about and can't remember a single one of his songs (I don't even remember his song from BATMAN, though I know I've heard it), but I assume like MJ it's just not something I'd enjoy.

I like Niel Young, the Beatles or Ravi Shankar.
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post #32 of 87
7/8/10 at 5:41pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Princess Kate View Post
Fair enough, I don't dance in public so if he makes dance music it could still be timeless but just totally off my radar.
He makes music for something else you can't legally do in public.

Princess Kate, I'm gonna request you be my partner in the next CD swap.
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post #33 of 87
7/8/10 at 5:47pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Raspberry Leper View Post
He makes music for something else you can't legally do in public.
Ah..

Well, I am currently abstaining and have been for a while, and regardless, I prefer silence anyway. Plus, one of the few Prince related facts currently stored in my gray matter is that he writes songs that substitute numbers for words (such as '2' for 'to'). I don't even stay friends with people who use IM speak, so I don't know why I'd listen to a musician who did that
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post #34 of 87
7/8/10 at 6:01pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Princess Kate View Post
Ah..

Well, I am currently abstaining and have been for a while, and regardless, I prefer silence
You sound like a lot of fun in bed.
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post #35 of 87
7/8/10 at 6:04pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Princess Kate View Post
Plus, one of the few Prince related facts currently stored in my gray matter is that he writes songs that substitute numbers for words (such as '2' for 'to').
And yet you find it perfectly acceptable to abbreviate film titles to acronyms. Personally, I'll take "Nothing Compares 2 U" over POTCCOTBP any day of the week. That's just how I roll.


Oh, and hidden meaning: I picked that particular song because, Princess, nothing compares to you!
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post #36 of 87
7/8/10 at 6:16pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mattioli View Post
And yet you find it perfectly acceptable to abbreviate film titles to acronyms. Personally, I'll take "Nothing Compares 2 U" over POTCCOTBP any day of the week. That's just how I roll.

Oh, and hidden meaning: I picked that particular song because, Princess, nothing compares to you!
Fair point. My love of acronyms dates back to highschool, I get a sense of satisfaction from rattling off a long complex abbreviation that's hard to beat. Same goes for typing them. I'm not saying that Prince is a bad musician for using 2 for 'to', I'm just saying he's not the musician for me.

Anyway, thanks Mattioli, I'm more than happy to accept your grammatically incorrect compliment

PS RL, Without getting it, I think fact that I've been abstaining speaks to the fact that I don't have much fun there myself either
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post #37 of 87
7/8/10 at 9:57pm
Prince could take Alexander in a fight. With sex.
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post #38 of 87
7/8/10 at 10:12pm
All Prince wants is love and water.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tZAmXNE_gA8
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post #39 of 87
7/8/10 at 10:13pm
Prince had totally onwed that 2 shit BEFORE netspeak. Man is a fucking genius.
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post #40 of 87
7/8/10 at 11:20pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Princess Kate View Post
OK, I've heard the one in BATMAN and I'm sure that at some point in my life I heard a Prince song playing and didn't know it. I just don't know anything about the man or his music. He's before my time (my time commencing in July of 1986)
Using that logic, there's a lot that you haven't seen or heard because it's before your time.
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post #41 of 87
7/8/10 at 11:30pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cameron Hughes View Post
Using that logic, there's a lot that you haven't seen or heard because it's before your time.
Prince says something outrageous and Batshit crazy.

In other breaking news, the Sun came up this morning....
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post #42 of 87
7/8/10 at 11:39pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Princess Kate View Post
I just don't know anything about the man or his music. He's before my time (my time commencing in July of 1986)
And yet, you love the Beatles? Who broke up 16 years before you were born I might add.

Kate, do us all a favor and go buy Prince's Purple Rain. Right. now.
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post #43 of 87
7/8/10 at 11:50pm
Wasn't Alexander before Kates time?
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post #44 of 87
7/8/10 at 11:51pm
Alexander is timeless!
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post #45 of 87
7/8/10 at 11:51pm
Not Oliver Stone's Alexander.
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post #46 of 87
7/8/10 at 11:55pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ravi View Post
Kate, do us all a favor and go buy Prince's Purple Rain. Right. now.
You don't have a music collection until you own Purple Rain. It's just one of those albums.
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post #47 of 87
7/9/10 at 1:59am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Greg David View Post
You don't have a music collection until you own Purple Rain. It's just one of those albums.
All of Prince's Batshit craziness is forgiven because of Purple Rain. It is,simply,one of the great masterpieces of Rock.
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post #48 of 87
7/9/10 at 2:02am
The percussion alone in Purple Rain absolves him of his insanity. The rest of it absolves him of mass murder, should he ever choose to take his career in that direction.
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post #49 of 87
7/9/10 at 2:57am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Princess Kate View Post
OK, I've heard the one in BATMAN
Unless your copy of Batman only has sound for the first five minutes, you should have heard more than ONE song by Prince. All of the non-score music (and even one or two pieces of the score) in that movie belong to Prince.

And I'll echo the sentiment that Purple Rain is a must-own.
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post #50 of 87
7/9/10 at 10:41am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Raspberry Leper View Post
Alexander is timeless!
But slightly less timeless than Prince.

Alexander is more Morris Day and the Timeless.
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