ONE SENTENCE IN HOLMES / SANDLER / PACINO FLICK GUARANTEES I WON'T SEE IT

Thanks for the smokin' Holmes pic.

Pacino is playing himself in an Adam Sandler movie? Bleech. I just saw Pacino this summer do Shakespeare In The Park for his first time. He's 70 now and was magnificent on stage. They're bringing the show to Broadway. It pisses me off that he'll turn around and do bullshit like this.

This is Sandler punishing audiences for not turning out for the excellent Funny People. And dear God, is he going to punish us.

Yeah, but to be punished I'd have to watch.

I don't know who the audience for such a movie is. The very idea makes my skin crawl. Are "mainstream Americans" so head over heels in love with Sandler they'd follow him off the cliff like this, or might this comedy be testing the limits of even his fan base?

In short: Yes.
In long: Yeessssssssssssssssssssssss.

Not sure where Al Pacino playing himself fits into a family problem like this, but I'm sure it will be awkwardly shoe-horned in.

Funny, the sentence that guarantees I won't be seeing it is "Pacino is playing himself." What an awful idea, and coupled with Sandler playing two roles? Jesus.

We live in a world where the Meet the Spartans guys continue to occupy screens. I'll cringe when Sandler remakes Freaky Friday with Justin Bieber.

As opposed to the somewhat similar movie with Zac Efron?

It seems that Sandler is going the Eddie Murphy route now. The only thing that could have saved this movie is if it was actually Jean Claude Van Damme playing both parts, as a transexual sequel to DOUBLE IMPACT.

Ah well, if only the promise of FUNNY PEOPLE was kept.

I can just imagine the voice the sister will have.

I was thinking closer to the Gap girls.

Not to be a dick, but the movie and Sandler's dual role was announced last October (I remember Devin did a post lamenting Sandler's decision to follow Funny People with a distinctly George Simmons-esque role). That said, despite being an unabashed Sandler fan, I agree this doesn't bode well, although the presence of Holmes is what's really turning me off.

Yikes.

Like I said in the "Grown Ups" thread he was on such a good run with Zohan (which is funnier everytime I see it), Bedtime Stories (shut up) and Funny People. Then he goes and makes shit like this and grown ups. It's kinda sad. Althought it's sadder that this POS will still make a ton of money.

Ha yeah.


Uh-oh.

If we would've just honored his pudding coupons this all could have been avoided.

It is weird to think that, after all those fake George Simmons trailers, I really thought Sandler was taking a step away from these kind of things. What was I smoking?

I think I want to see Eli Roth beat Sandler to death with a baseball bat. Just for the irony.

Oh God Pacino's going to fall for Drag Sandler, isn't he.

See, ignoring stuff like this is pretty easy and movies like this I learn to just chill out and let them just pass under my radar. What's soul-crushing is when you're hanging out with or meet someone in real life that brings it up and voices interest in it, or even worse suggests you watch it with them.

Unbelievable. Who green lights this shit? Who genuinely thinks that dressing up Sandler like a woman is a good idea? I don't know if anyone wants to see Sandler crossdress anymore (if they even did in the first place). And Pacino playing himself? Jesus, Al, go do more theater stuff, you're 70, you're probably endlessly wealthy, you don't need to do crap like this anymore. Please stop.

Given my high Sandler threshold, I'm just hoping he's funnier as a woman than Michael J Fox in Back To The Future Part 2.

Sometimes it's easier not to face these things alone.  Allow George C. Scott to suffer along with you.

 

Hardcore's Scott watches the Jack And Jill trailer:

http://youtu.be/qKSAvNOIaNo

Adding my love of Zohan it's suprisingly funny.  I still hope that one day we will see him return to movies like that and Wedding Singer, which is, what he should be doing.

 

Well, this will keep my streak of not seeing Sandler movies in the theater going for another year.

CHUD's review will be posted tomorrow morning. Avoid this film at all costs.

 

Well, duh.

Poor, poor Tim. Why would you watch that?

 

The only way this movie would be worth watching would be if it turned into Sea Of Love midway, with she-Shandler replacing Ellen Barkin. 

It occurred to me that I was having a great run of film screenings. I can't always go see films I want to see, so I took the screening hoping it wasn't as bad as it looked. But I was not prepared. Twas brutal. Anally.  

I would be as bold as to say it's better than Grown Ups and Just Go With It.

 

Also, SURPRISE, it's still cat piss.

 

At least they gave Norm MacDonald some dialogue in this one. Not enough to be funny, but his facial expressions and his general attitude of being above this movie were the highlight for me.

The trailer made me want to swallow nails.  This is what people will look back on fifty years hence and say, "So this is what people were watching during the Great Recession?"