China Vacation

Approaching the mid point of a 3 week vacation in China and I gotta say: it's like living off the body of a giant smoker.

So far ...

Beijing .... and environs are the hairy nostrils, encrusted with the filth of a thousand unfiltered Camels and the mucous of a million colds. It has and is near a lot of great stuff, but you're constantly sucking and coughing out black tar. At least the open sewars and garbage everywhere add some character to your respiratory/pulmonary collapse.

Jiuzhaigou .... the last good looking tuft of hair on the balding, liver spotted pate. Absolutely beautiful, pristine and filled with friendly Tibetans and rapacious Chinese.

Chengdu .... the interesting bump between the brows. Close to all of the interesting stuff but not big enough to have the problems of the big cities. The Calgary of China and its miniskirted, leggy amazon capital.

Chongqing .... the crab and lice infested, sweltering crotch. Hot, humid, polluted beyond imagining plus filled to the brim with the worst China has to offer. If the world is to suffer a zombie apocalypse, it would start in Chongqing's tourist dives and nobody would notice or care for a week. Needs to die by fire.

Next up: cruise down the Yangtze to Shanghai.

The problem with Taiwan is that Mandarin has slowly replaced Taiwanese (Fujian -- which are nothing alike) plus writing in Traditional is like a military art.
Also, the young Taiwanese I know are snobs -- consciously or not.

Just arrived in Shanghai ...

Yangtze River .... the stream of sweat down the distended belly. Almost post apocalyptic in its lack of life -- no birds or fish and only flies, moths, mosquitos, huge grasshoppers and islands of garbage. Fog/smog/haze everywhere and dilapidated ships melt in and out all the time. Occasionally pass a boat pumping out its bilge in a huqe stream into the river.

Fengdu .... long lost site of a burnt off ass wart. Ghost town with a Taiwanese-funded version of Daoist Hell. Had fun trying to lift the 400lb "rock of fidelity".

Three Gorges Dam .... the fashionable rolled up under the moobs shirt over the beer gut. Huge feat of engineering with an utter lack of concern for culture or the environment, e.g. many millennia old relics/sites now under water and no fish ladders. Lots of spin off industries like river cruising and related tourism.

Wuhan .... the dark nether regions of the belly button. Hot as all fuck and in the middle of kick out the poor to make way for rich tourists renos. Has the cheesiest of the Concession buildings.

Huangshan .... the vault of the mind. Incredibly amazing evocative/picturesque mountain with dangerous paths thrown in for fun. The spiritual and physical antithesis of Chongqing.

Nanjing .... weary, bloodshot eyes. Former capital several times over and Japanese bayonet playground, full of historical sites, tombs, temples and forts -- all lovingly rebuilt after being destroyed by man or fire. Climate is also suited for making roast tourist.

Shanghai .... diamond encrusted, 24 oz rodeo champ belt buckle. The perfect confluence of wealth, beauty and success -- with every intention of flaunting it. Homeless and polite foreigners are paved over if they stand still.