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SKELETON IV'S ONE-HANDED REVIEWS: LESBIAN VAMPIRES

post #1 of 35
10/4/10 at 6:30pm
Thread Starter 
Skeleton IV and Mr. Creepo are friends.

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post #2 of 35
10/4/10 at 6:48pm
Makes me miss the old CHUD marquee layout. Could've finally made that "PORN" link work.
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post #3 of 35
10/4/10 at 7:33pm
Fuck the talkbackers to death. I love this.
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post #4 of 35
10/4/10 at 7:38pm
Love the graphic, love the concept but I have to agree with the one talkbacker who said that Skeleton IV speaking in the third person kills it for me. It's so hard to read articles in the third-person. Same reason I can't stomach the Paranormal Activity Demon articles, despite loving Sam Strange to bits.
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post #5 of 35
10/4/10 at 7:41pm
That is awesome. The third person thing that talk bakers are pissing about? Love it. I love that this isn't a humor site, but is full of interesting articles that don't have to follow established norms. You'd never find that on Latino Review (no disrespect meant), and that shouldn't change.

People getting pissy about it makes no sense, that is straight up classic CHUD.
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post #6 of 35
10/4/10 at 7:42pm
The deal with Skeleton IV is that he is a sentient bonebody who speaks in the third person. Hopefully he grows on you.
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post #7 of 35
10/4/10 at 7:45pm
If the byline said SeanBaby no one would be complaining about the third person. It works.
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post #8 of 35
10/4/10 at 8:00pm
Quote:
Skeleton has read elsewhere that "gallons of blood" were used in certain scenes, but IV must have been wearing his quart glasses the day he watched this film
Approved!
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post #9 of 35
10/4/10 at 8:04pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tony Ryan View Post
If the byline said SeanBaby no one would be complaining about the third person. It works.
When did Seanbaby ever do third person?
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post #10 of 35
10/4/10 at 8:09pm
EGM. He did one as a puppy reviewing DS dog games. I'm kinda blanking on if there are others, but that was some good shit.

I might be mistaken, but I believe there is some on Cracked too. For a couple of his stranger lists.
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post #11 of 35
10/4/10 at 8:14pm
Ah. I mostly read earlier Seanbaby on EGM and his site, before he went to Cracked, never recalled any third person stuff at all.

I think third person works better spoken aloud than on paper.
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post #12 of 35
10/4/10 at 8:16pm
Heh, I totally can see that. I was more talking about the talkbackers complaining it isn't CHUD enough.
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post #13 of 35
10/4/10 at 8:25pm
It is as CHUD as CHUD has ever been and since I'm NOT Skeleton IV it's just another facet to add to the mix. Thing that bothers me is this:

We've been rocking all sorts of (for a change) DIVERSE content and lots of it. What's not to love? Not every article is for everyone.
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post #14 of 35
10/4/10 at 8:29pm
Yeah, I agree. It's been nice seeing the site beef up and only become better. But dicks are going to complain about things that aren't for them like it's the end of the world. It's the internets.
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post #15 of 35
10/5/10 at 12:22am
Can we make it where he gets all of the Bill Zebub shit?
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post #16 of 35
10/5/10 at 8:57am
It's too early for me to decide about the writing style. I will say this: Any coverage of truly off the radar, non mainstream anything is cool by me. Even if it is shit. Which this...whatever it is..."movie" I guess...most definitely is. Compare this to the Fangoria Frightfest reviews (which I'm loving on a totally different level) and the breadth and depth of what's out there in genre releases becomes frighteningly apparent. Yikes!
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post #17 of 35
10/5/10 at 6:20pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nick Nunziata View Post
I love this.
Me, too. I cannot stress enough how much I love this. Actual tears started to form in my eyes from all the laughing.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nick Nunziata View Post
The deal with Skeleton IV is that he is a sentient bonebody who speaks in the third person. Hopefully he grows on you.
That this even needs to be said pains me. Skeleton IV is a star.

Don't let smile-resistant talkbackers deter you, my emaciated friend! You're the tonic we all need, even if some of us don't know it yet.
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post #18 of 35
10/5/10 at 6:35pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nick Nunziata View Post
Hopefully he grows on you.
My concern is that he grows IN me and my infrastructure becomes Skeleton V. I can't do much without my bones.

But, yeah, much love for this review and Skeleton IV. I vote for a Paranormal Activity Demon - Skeleton IV Tag Team Review.
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post #19 of 35
10/5/10 at 6:37pm
I second that.
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post #20 of 35
10/5/10 at 10:36pm
The fuck is this?
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post #21 of 35
10/5/10 at 10:46pm
Funny. This is funny.
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post #22 of 35
10/5/10 at 10:48pm
I like the idea and I'm interested to see where it goes.

His twitter account on the other hand had me at "Jonathan Frakes"
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post #23 of 35
10/5/10 at 10:48pm
That Twitter feed is downright Fleedian.
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post #24 of 35
10/5/10 at 10:49pm
That is not the real Skeleton IV on that Twitter.
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post #25 of 35
10/5/10 at 10:51pm
Hey, Gruber's Eye Condition is back. Yay?
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post #26 of 35
10/5/10 at 11:00pm
This is getting too complicated. Fake twitter feeds. Old board members I vaguely recall. I need an abacus to keep track of the twist and turns this new feature is taking!
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post #27 of 35
10/6/10 at 12:29am
Well, at least there's a good amount of diverse content on the site.
I'm glad some of you guys found it funny because I thought this was just terrible.
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post #28 of 35
10/6/10 at 12:49am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tim Long View Post
I like the idea and I'm interested to see where it goes.

His twitter account on the other hand had me at "Jonathan Frakes"
This led me to Jonathan Frakes' twitter account, which is terrifyingly real. The guy is really into food these days.
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post #29 of 35
10/6/10 at 8:35am
I have to admit, I'm sort of jealous that this thread is already at 28 comments.
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post #30 of 35
10/6/10 at 8:44am
Aw, Sam! We love you too! Just because there's a new baby in the house doesn't mean that you've been replaced. You're this baby's big brother now and before you know it you're going to love it as much as your dad and I do.

Or something like that. Something funnier actually.
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post #31 of 35
10/6/10 at 9:05am
I always saw myself as a Wayne Arnold type of older brother. Hope that's okay with Skeleton IV.

Also, I read it a couple times, but may have missed the mention: Is there a reason why Skeleton IV is in space?
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post #32 of 35
10/6/10 at 9:27am
The only reason this thread is where it is, is because there are a small group of very vocal people with too much time on their hands trying to make a big deal out of a tiny column and use it in the 'case against the new chud'.
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post #33 of 35
10/6/10 at 10:01am
I don't think those people liked the old chud either.
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post #34 of 35
10/6/10 at 10:05am
I thought most of the posts in this thread were supportive. Maybe my snark button is faulty.

The comments beneath the article are were the ire is.

ETA: "Where" "Where the ire is." Jesus.
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post #35 of 35
10/6/10 at 11:02am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Peter Judson View Post
Aw, Sam! We love you too! Just because there's a new baby in the house doesn't mean that you've been replaced. You're this baby's big brother now and before you know it you're going to love it as much as your dad and I do.
My thoughts exactly. Just because you sign Messi for your Master League Dream Team doesn't mean you leave David Villa on the bench to rot. You reap the (numerous) benefits of both.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nick Nunziata View Post
The only reason this thread is where it is, is because there are a small group of very vocal people with too much time on their hands trying to make a big deal out of a tiny column and use it in the 'case against the new chud'.
Whilst this is very true, the thread would've already been at a fair size anyway, because of me rephrasing how much I love the column and Skeleton's nifty intergalactic beach-ball on his author's page.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sam Strange View Post
I don't think those people liked the old chud either.
Neither do I. Those talkbackers are probably the kind of people who don't enjoy Back to the Future either. They needn't concern us.
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