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Movie Buddy Litmus Test?

post #1 of 45
12/29/10 at 12:15pm
Thread Starter 
I'm sorry if there's a thread like this, but I have no idea what I would search to bring it up regardless.

When you first meet a friend that says they're into movies, do you give them a comparability test of sorts?

When me and my current girlfriend met, we hadn't seen each other since childhood and she claimed she was into "Crazy horror movies." So what did I do? I gave her my copy of "Ichi the Killer" and told her to report back to me when she was done. This is probably why I have trouble getting more dates

In retrospect, it was a dicky thing to do, but I was so thrilled by the prospect that an attractive, cool girl was into the same things I was I couldn't help myself. She loved it by the way

Do you have a film you use as a litmus test of sorts to judge friend's viewing habits or compatibility? Which one is it? Any unexpected stories arise from these "tests?"
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post #2 of 45
12/29/10 at 12:26pm
Before the prequels came out, my litmus test for new friends was 'which Star Wars film is your favorite?' I'm a TESB guy, and I found for a long time that I was not compatible with ROTJ people. As an example, I had a girlfriend for a year who loved ROTJ and absolutely hated TESB...we were fine with comedies, but we simply could not get along on other genres. We got tired of battling over movies (I wouldn't want to see HER movies and she wouldn't want to see MINE) so we stopped watching them together. That wasn't the only reason why I broke up with her but it was certainly a strong contributing factor. I've run into others that didn't care for TESB...I can't think of a single situation where I've been able to form a lasting friendship with one of them.
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post #3 of 45
12/29/10 at 12:37pm
If they like Grease 2, we must sadly part ways.
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post #4 of 45
12/29/10 at 12:39pm
Thread Starter 
Star Wars is definitely another big one for me. Another one I use a lot is to trick them into telling me their interpretation of Fight Club. If the answer is along the lines of "It's a wicked action movie with an awesome group called "Project Mayhem!" I wish it existed in real life" I tune out.

I love you Fight Club, but you're a misunderstood animal.
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post #5 of 45
12/29/10 at 12:42pm
This question/situation has been made all the easier since Twilight came out.

I do have personal films that I dislike that I would give a significant other shit about and most likely would never watch with them but as far as movies yet unreleased(kinda directed at you, Judas, if you were talking about home video only then disregard) I think I would go see something I wasn't totally down for in the interests of "meet-in-the-middle" relationship responsibilities.

Especially if she had gone to see The Human Centipede with little to mild hesitation.
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post #6 of 45
12/29/10 at 12:44pm
Thread Starter 
I love The Human Centipede, I haven't seen it with the girlie though. I honestly never thought to ask, I might have to do that now... She'll probably be dissapointed we didn't see it sooner
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post #7 of 45
12/29/10 at 12:48pm
I was talkling about home video, for the most part.

I have no problem seeing a film that I'm not necessarily interested in as long as it has a perception of quality to it. If she's in the mood for a romantic comedy and wants me to see 'Notting Hill' with her, then I'm fine with it and I'll probably enjoy it to a certain degree (actually, I ended up loving 'Notting Hill'). If she pushes to see something like 'Made in America', then I'm going to resist. Guilty pleasures/watchable trash have their place in my movie library, but not at the exclusion of quality.
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post #8 of 45
12/29/10 at 12:54pm
"____ Movie (Epic, Scary) is the funniest shit ever!" Or any of those horrid holocausts on humor. Doubt we'll be seeing many movies, if any.

Lord of the Rings is good one. I won't out and out dislike someone for not liking it, but if they don't, they better have a good reason for it besides 'Hobbits r dum' or 'it's too long'. Always had short patience for people who fall asleep during movies.

Also, I'm largely suspect of any woman who doesn't like The Princess Bride. I will admit I have yet to encounter any, but I'm sure they're out there...
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post #9 of 45
12/29/10 at 12:54pm
If they tell me their favorite film is Boondock Saints or Donnie Darko, I used to tune out, but I've found in recent years that those people are often more open to other, cooler films. Ones that your average joe might not even give the time of day.
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post #10 of 45
12/29/10 at 1:01pm
I just started dating a girl who is really into movies but... her and her brother LOVE Boondock Saints. Like, love love it. Otherwise she has really good taste.


And she's fucking HOT. Like insanely hot. And nice, sweet, cool, caring, all that good stuff. I'm overlooking Boondock Saints for now. I'm also going to coerce her into watching Overnight as soon as possible. Just so hopefully, she can see my side a little more clearly.


Having said that, my thing has always been more about what you WON'T watch as opposed to what you like or don't like. It's the utter refusal to try certain things that puts me off.
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post #11 of 45
12/29/10 at 1:14pm
My ultimate litmus test is Crank. But this is for real cinematic soulmates. For simple movie buddies it's the "LOTR is gay" jokes. If anyone makes this joke I don't want to even watch Coca Cola ads with them.
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post #12 of 45
12/29/10 at 1:17pm
If they like the Coens, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, Aronofsky, and a few more, we are good.
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post #13 of 45
12/29/10 at 1:21pm
My platonic movie buddy and general guy friend had no idea going into Black Swan that it was an Aronofsky film nor much beyond it was a "thriller" with his two favorite female celebs.

He made a remark about it being gay that we were going to see a ballet film together. I laughed it off because of our sense of humour not knowing he was less informed about it than the films I make him go see which he usually is right up there on knowledge about.

He began to rattle off the reasons he wanted to go see it, one of which is a camera he owns was used to shoot the subway and a few other scenes. I interrupted him at the second one and said the Kunis/Portman lesbian scene? He had no idea but suddenly the ballet film became less, "Two tickets to Guys and Dolls!" and more he forgot I was there knowing he'd get to see what he saw.
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post #14 of 45
12/29/10 at 1:25pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tati View Post
If they like the Coens, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, Aronofsky, and a few more, we are good.
This, pretty much. KKBB and THE FOUNTAIN are great litmus test flicks for movie buddies.

One of my closest friends is someone I cannot talk cinema with, because his tastes (and goals) in movies are 180 degrees of mine. He has a demanding job writing code, a challenging home life...so he wants movies that entertain and require no thought.

He called THE FOUNTAIN "too dark", so I've pretty much stopped talking about flicks with him at all.
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post #15 of 45
12/29/10 at 1:26pm
I don't need people to have my exact taste in movies but if we're talking a girl I'd date, then most important would be that she doesn't find foreign or cerebral movies (eg. Memento, Jesse James, Oldboy) "boring". It honestly grills me whenever I hear that complaint about movies.

If we're talking "cinematic soulmates" then a love of crazy horror flicks can't hurt.
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post #16 of 45
12/29/10 at 1:37pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nexus-7 View Post
If they tell me their favorite film is Boondock Saints or Donnie Darko, I used to tune out, but I've found in recent years that those people are often more open to other, cooler films. Ones that your average joe might not even give the time of day.
I have a friend whose favorite film is Boondock Saints. We're seeing Black Swan together tomorrow. Her suggestion. She's in the clear in my book.
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post #17 of 45
12/29/10 at 1:38pm
I don't consider myself a heavy lifting film buff. I think it might be possible to know if they are kinda "into" asking:

...if they know like Crash? Only one correct answer, not "which one" neither "the one which got an Oscar?"
Favorite Tarantino's Coen or PTA.
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post #18 of 45
12/29/10 at 1:42pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Justin Clark View Post
I have a friend whose favorite film is Boondock Saints. We're seeing Black Swan together tomorrow. Her suggestion. She's in the clear in my book.
The big saving grace for the girl I started dating is that Boondock Saints love aside, she has rightfully chastised me for not seeing a healthy grip of pre-60s films. If a hot girl (or any film-companion really) is unafraid of black and white films, older classic films and foreign films, then I could overlook a little side-affair with Boondock Saints.
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post #19 of 45
12/29/10 at 1:50pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by joeypants View Post
If a hot girl (or any film-companion really) is unafraid of black and white films, older classic films and foreign films, then I could overlook a little side-affair with Boondock Saints.
I don't mind the Boondocks Saints as an action movie as I do the message behind it. If somebody just thinks it's a fun movie to vegitate to, then by all mean watch it. It's just when people get all gung-ho about it's meanings and "deepness" that it bothers me.

Also, watching Boondocks Saints just makes me wish I was watching Goodfellas instead
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post #20 of 45
12/29/10 at 8:42pm
CITY OF GOD is one I drop in conversation. If you've heard of it / seen it, odds are we're on the same page
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post #21 of 45
12/29/10 at 9:02pm
28 Days Later for me. If I'm told it's boring then I head for the door. Also, no snickering at Cillian Murphy's wang. Okay, maybe a little snickerking.
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post #22 of 45
12/29/10 at 9:02pm
Just to clarify, I didn't mean to compare the actual quality of Boondock Saints and Donnie Darko by grouping them together, just that they're both overrated to death. They seem to have become favorite films of people with questionable taste more often than most, for whatever reason.
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post #23 of 45
12/29/10 at 9:58pm
Thread Starter 
Boondocks Saints may not be great, but at least you know what the fuck is happening. And Gary Jules singing about killing himself isn't ringing through your ears the whole time.

The more and more I talk about Donnie Darko, the more unpleasant it is to be around me
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post #24 of 45
12/29/10 at 10:31pm
Anyone who can't stomach a movie with an unhappy ending is someone I needn't waste my time with.
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post #25 of 45
12/29/10 at 10:38pm
Thread Starter 
I use "No Country" for that aspect as well. I can't deal with people that didn't like the ending.
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post #26 of 45
12/29/10 at 11:45pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tati View Post
If they like the Coens, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, Aronofsky, and a few more, we are good.
This was going to be mine. Anyone who likes movies has to at the very least have respect Kiss Kiss Bang Bang. Everyone.

If I turned away from people who like Boondock Saints I honestly would be a lonely individual. Everyone I've known in high school and college who has seen it thinks it's the bee's knees. So that one has become less of a litmus test and more of a "use caution" sign.

ETA: I knew a guy who seemed pretty cool, and I mentioned to him that I was going to see Up with some friends. After he was done laughing he asked, "You mean that kid's movie? Come on man, seriously?" I haven't talked to him in awhile...
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post #27 of 45
12/30/10 at 12:00am
Thread Starter 
I think people that feel that children's entertainment is somehow "lesser" and automatically "not as good" are the reason kids these days fucking suck.
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post #28 of 45
12/30/10 at 12:37am
On one of our first dates, my girlfriend proceeded to point out how shitty the ADR is in LA CONFIDENTIAL, and how that ruins the film for her.

When you fall in love, this shit tends to matter a lot, lot less than you think.
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post #29 of 45
12/30/10 at 12:41am
My wife and I aren't movie compatible. It hasn't hurt our marital compatibility in the least.

It's always nice to meet someone with shared interests, but I guess I don't understand what the big deal is. It seems to really matter to some of you, like on an elemental level, what movies someone else likes. Who gives a shit?

Maybe I'm reading these too literally.
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post #30 of 45
12/30/10 at 12:41am
Quote:
Originally Posted by RathBandu View Post
When you fall in love, this shit tends to matter a lot, lot less than you think.
Yeah, my wife can't bring herself to watch scary or intense or bloody movies. They're just too much for her. She's a good Irish girl and has never seen Titanic because she's afraid it would make her too sad. But I love her, so I quietly find something else to do when she pops in the Bridget Jones duology.
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post #31 of 45
12/30/10 at 12:46am
I guarantee you, if you told me a year ago that I would have seen the SEX AND THE CITY movies more times than INCEPTION or SCOTT PILGRIM or BLACK SWAN combined, I would have slapped your face. Downside of living in a studio apartment.

That being said, the girl is really excited about BLACK SWAN and still gets on my case about taking her to see THE EXPENDABLES Instead of FACE/OFF on the big screen, so we do have similar tastes in certain arenas.
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post #32 of 45
12/30/10 at 12:49am
Quote:
Originally Posted by RathBandu View Post
On one of our first dates, my girlfriend proceeded to point out how shitty the ADR is in LA CONFIDENTIAL, and how that ruins the film for her.

When you fall in love, this shit tends to matter a lot, lot less than you think.
I'd think that the fact she knew what ADR was would at least be a good sign!
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post #33 of 45
12/30/10 at 1:26am
I think I've used Dead Alive as my "litmus movie" more often than anything else. If they haven't heard of it (and most haven't) that's fine, but I WILL show them. That and Grosse Point Blank, which seems a bit random even to me, actually.
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post #34 of 45
12/30/10 at 1:56am
I had a buddy who professed himself to be a "movie snob," and then, while my movie geek best friend and I were discussing Citizen Kane, he told us that he thought the film was boring and dated. He's a nice guy, but I don't talk movies with him.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jonathan Banks is my hero View Post
It's always nice to meet someone with shared interests, but I guess I don't understand what the big deal is. It seems to really matter to some of you, like on an elemental level, what movies someone else likes. Who gives a shit?
This. It's really not that big of a deal. If a friend of mine doesn't like Tarkovsky, he might love Dexter Gordon. Perhaps he hates jazz, but likes comics like the Invisibles. Maybe everything he loves makes me die a little inside, but he's an outstanding person.

That said, some of the stuff I like is so obscure that I end up with no one to discuss it with. So, meeting someone who, say, loves the band Medicine or made special effort to attend the last My Bloody Valentine reunion concert is a pretty special occasion for me.
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post #35 of 45
12/30/10 at 2:04am
I don't think I'd be able to have a romantic relationship with someone who didn't at least broadly share my taste in film. I love NINJA ASSASSIN, and while not everyone on CHUD may like that one, this is still the film website for me. The Fly, Amelie, Starship Troopers and Up all get equal amounts of respect on CHUD, and that kind of base line compatibility makes CHUD a place where I enjoy discussing movies. I might not always agree with everyone, but I can respect their opinion. I don't think I could respect someone who liked terrible movies and hated good ones
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post #36 of 45
12/30/10 at 2:12am
Thread Starter 
I mean, it doesn't really matter. It's not like I'm going to seriously treat somebody different over there opinions of "Ichi the Killer," it's just a fun way to judge people on a dumb level. Nothing more.
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post #37 of 45
12/30/10 at 2:17am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Princess Kate View Post
I don't think I'd be able to have a romantic relationship with someone who didn't at least broadly share my taste in film.

I want to hear more about this.
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post #38 of 45
12/30/10 at 2:23am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Anderson View Post
I want to hear more about this.
Not much more to add. Just see some people saying that they use favorite films as a litmus test for such relationships, while others like Dickson state that they are happily married even if don't see eye to eye on film with their spouse

IMHO it would be critically important to enjoy the same kinds of films at least in general before romance would be possible
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post #39 of 45
12/30/10 at 2:26am
This would be an interesting topic to explore from the opposite perspective as well. I know people whose turnoffs include a snobby attitude about things they consider unimportant, like film, pop culture, music, etc...
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post #40 of 45
12/30/10 at 2:26am
What if you agreed on everything but Ray Stevenson?
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post #41 of 45
12/30/10 at 2:34am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sphere_Monk View Post
This would be an interesting topic to explore from the opposite perspective as well. I know people whose turnoffs include a snobby attitude about things they consider unimportant, like film, pop culture, music, etc...
Interesting. I don't even think I'm friends with many people who don't consider film important enough to at least have an opinion on

Quote:
Originally Posted by Patrick Ripoll View Post
What if you agreed on everything but Ray Stevenson?
ROME wouldn't have to be their favorite thing ever, but in general an appreciation for HBO historical dramas would be key (DEADWOOD/CARNIVALE)

EDIT: Or at least a willingness to watch them and become a fan
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post #42 of 45
12/30/10 at 2:42am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Princess Kate View Post
Interesting. I don't even think I'm friends with many people who don't consider film important enough to at least have an opinion on
In my experience, they tend to be outdoorsy types. I don't put too much weight into that generalization though, because the friend who introduced me to most of my favorite rock bands both loved music and was an avid camper/fisher.
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post #43 of 45
12/30/10 at 2:44am
None of my personal close friends liked (or, honestly, got) Drag Me To Hell.

In different words, I apparently have none.
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post #44 of 45
1/1/11 at 12:49am
"Animation is for kids. I don't watch subtitled / black and white films. I like the prequels."

No more movie talk after that. Maybe you can get away with liking the prequels in an ironic way or something, but the rest means we won't discuss film.
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post #45 of 45
1/12/11 at 3:07pm

My tastes are so varied that I can't imagine boiling it all down to one or two films that somebody must like in order to determine compatibility.  My wife, though not nearly as into film as I am, at least sees eye to eye with me on a lot of it.  She won't even watch Twilight.

 

Basically, it's pretty rare that I can't find something to call common ground eventually.  That said, my wife has one friend who has utterly buggered all my efforts to meet in the middle.  He thinks Forrest Gump is one of the greatest movies ever made.  His favorite Bond film is A View to a Kill, and he thought Casino Royale sucked.  He liked Van Helsing.  It's like he watches movies on Bizarro World.  I haven't agreed with him about a movie yet.  And I have to admit it, it makes it difficult for me to like him, because if he's that wrong about that many things, what else is fucked up in his brain?

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