LIVE OSCARS COVERAGE (REFRESH ALL NIGHT!)

Best dressed woman so far is a 14 year old girl who designed her own dress.  Go Hailee!

Thanks, Nick. I enjoyed your Oscar coverage. It was comforting to know someone else was cringing at the same things.

Didn't get to follow along live this year. But I read through it on the main page. As always, great stuff.

The Michelle Williams comparison to Dame Judi was spot on and still has me chuckling.  Thanks for coverage more entertaining than the actual show.

I don't know all the things it takes over a lifetime to form a brain which comes up with such utterances as God he annoys me so hard all the Gatorade I’ve ever had flies back up my pisshole, The only sound more beautiful than Celine Dion’s voice is Leatherface sawing through Celine Dion and Serious Tangent: These articles are often just me poking fun at people and the stuff I say is often cheap and superficial (I mean, Kirk Douglas doesn’t look anything like Mason Verger!) but there’s some real important stuff that involves stuff like this too. I’m not above heartwarming stuff, so I must say this: I really, REALLY want to watch Anne Hathaway fuck herself with a variety of long fruits and vegetables but I salute every one of those things. I salute them like the wind.

Nick, just wanted to say excellent job on the posts. The folks in chat were just doing our best to be pale echoes of your dark, diseased humor.

And to the folks in the chat last night: well done. Most fun I've had watching the Oscars in forever.

I'll take Nick's brilliant stream-of-consciousness stuff over every sour, aging critics' clapping themselves on the back over how much they disdain the Oscars every single fucking year.

Wow. That's flattering. Thank you sir. Glad I ended on a good note. I'm done doing the running commentary. If I do something next year, I'm going to raise the stakes.