When your relationship ends. - Page 12

Kindest wishes to everyone from me too. Just...wow.

Quote:

Originally Posted by BlackyShimSham 

 

This thread makes me afraid to love.

Don't you dare.  There's decent folks out there.  I am at least a little heartened at the reactions of the men who orbit this situation.  His brother and dad are beside themselves, particularly his dad.  He didn't raise him this way.  I could almost, almost at least understand if his dad had abandoned him and he was following the example, but his dad's always been around, and his brother is happily outnumbered by his two daughters and his wife.  Our male friends are horrified.  My boyfriend looked about ready to pop a blood vessel in his head when he heard.  I'd barely gotten the words out before he said, "What can I do to help?" and volunteered to do whatever was necessary.  

Harley, this guy does realize that he's still going to have a financial obligation to those kids, right?  I mean, signing away parental rights doesn't sign away parental responsibility, doesn't it?

Harley, that guy is an immature shit who hasn't put away his childish notions.  Somebody needs to slap his sorry ass into adulthood.  His very existence offends me.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Richard Dickson 

Harley, this guy does realize that he's still going to have a financial obligation to those kids, right?  I mean, signing away parental rights doesn't sign away parental responsibility, doesn't it?

I discussed this with a friend who is a lawyer, and if I understood her correctly, the only way that he'd be absolved of financial responsibility is if the children were being given up for adoption.  So, he WILL be paying child support for three kids, along with alimony for his wife.   I don't know if he gets that.  Probably not.  Fucking asshole thought he could cut and run.

Fucking asshole.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Judas Booth 

Harley, that guy is an immature shit who hasn't put away his childish notions.  Somebody needs to slap his sorry ass into adulthood.  His very existence offends me.

As much as I like to believe I should be above this type of behavior, should someone do somthing like that to one of mine there's no telling what I'd do.

He wants to live for himself? Better learn to do on disability benefits because that's the only money he'd be able to make for the rest of his life. 

Quote:

Originally Posted by HarleyQuinn22 

So, he WILL be paying child support for three kids, along with alimony for his wife.   I don't know if he gets that.  Probably not.  Fucking asshole thought he could cut and run.

 

Fucking asshole.

Well, he'll be required to pay it.  Whether he does or not remains to be seen.

He'll pay it if he doesn't want to go to jail.  'round these parts, you get thrown into the clink for delinquent child support payments.

Quote:

Originally Posted by HarleyQuinn22 

He'll pay it if he doesn't want to go to jail.  'round these parts, you get thrown into the clink for delinquent child support payments.

Yup. This is not anywhere near equal recompense for the appalling wreckage he's created in the lives around him, but it's a small consolation that he will literally be paying for his choice for a couple of decades.

Score one for the justice system!

You guys.  Oh my God, you guys.

So I just got a phone call from Jules' sister.  Fucktard called the house and DEMANDED THAT HE GET THE DOG IN THE DIVORCE.  The dog that is Jules' dog, the dog that she had well before she even met him, the dog that is micro-chipped and registered in her name with paperwork to prove it.  He wants her dog, but not his children.   Didn't even ask about the kids.  He wants her dog.

I laughed.  I had to laugh.  It was just so absurd.  

Yeah, this clown needs to eat the grill of a speeding truck.

I mean, the NERVE of this guy.

I'm with Richard. This guy's just taking up oxygen and resources for the actual humans.

Hmm. I thought things like this guy only existed in myth.

The guy is not a monster. He's human, unfortunately. I think the best way, the only way, to deal with a person like this is to shame the fuck out of them. Post the guy's name online over and over. Detail what he's done over and over so that if he is ever Google'd, or his name comes up in a random search, all the horrible shit he's done will haunt him. Oh, and post flyers everywhere in the area he lives letting all his neighbors know what a piece of shit he is.

Quote:

Originally Posted by donde  Post the guy's name online over and over. Detail what he's done over and over so that if he is ever Google'd, or his name comes up in a random search, all the horrible shit he's done will haunt him. Oh, and post flyers everywhere in the area he lives letting all his neighbors know what a piece of shit he is.

I'd love nothing more than to publicly shit all over him, but I don't want to give him a shred of ammo during this divorce to use against my friend.

Quote:

Originally Posted by HarleyQuinn22 

 

I'd love nothing more than to publicly shit all over him, but I don't want to give him a shred of ammo during this divorce to use against my friend.

Patience padawan. Patience. Divorce is almost guaranteed so once it's over, there's no reason why it can't be done then. May be even better to do then since the divorce is real by that point and he would have no defense. Any lawyers out there have any legal warnings against anything like this? Public shaming is a great motivator for so many things.

He's cheating are her, people.  Come on.

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Originally Posted by neil spurn 

He's cheating are her, people.  Come on.

Not an excuse to dump his children if he is, which he probably is, knowing this scumbag.

Certainly isn't.  Definitely didn't mean to imply that.  But I still say he's cheating on her.  People don't come to decisions like this without external influences.

Wow...what a nightmare. I'm glad the lady has the support of Harley and the rest of her friends. It does give one pause as I look out from the flaming debris of my own marriage to wonder about the future. I am like the exact opposite of this clown. I am working two jobs to support my soon to be ex as well as our twelve year old son while she finishes her student teaching. We're not making it very well, especially when she runs up a seven hundred dollar phone bill which translates to about a third of our current monthly income.

There will come a time when she can stop berating me at every opportunity while I work long and weird hours supporting her, when I could cut her loose and let her collapse into a puddle of her own ick. That time cannot come soon enough. So why am I doing this, I can hear you asking. It's not for her at this point, it's for my son. He has already told me he'd rather live with me than her, but that won't be an option until he's thirteen...which is the beginning of November.

I want her to complete the student teaching so she can earn a better living. Of course, I won't see any return on investment in the years I ghost wrote papers and so forth for her. My only hope is I am free and clear of her before she has yet another physical or mental collapse that usually comes round in the winter. It's hard to be compassionate for someone like this when they blame you for every ill in their lives since before the day you met them. I'm an admitted glutton for punishment, but even I have to push back from the table eventually.

So why did I stay with her for twenty years? My son primarily. Looking back, maybe that was a mistake but he's healthy and doing great in school despite the psychodrama happening at home. If I had to sacrifice that time in exchange for the least amount of damage to his psyche, it was worth it.

....sorry, didn't mean to kill the conversation lol....

Harley, what's the sitch  with your friend? Any improvement on that front?

It's still not very good.  Fucktard hasn't called at all since the "gimme your dog" incident, and the kids are starting to ask questions.  We've told them he's away on a trip for now, because we don't know how to explain this.  How do you tell a kid that Daddy doesn't want them?  Jules is fluctuating from day-to-day between utter despair and blind rage, and although she's trying to put on a good face for the kids, I think they can tell something is very wrong.  A couple of us took the two boys out today so she could feed the newborn in peace, but this is not going to end well for anyone.  It's a complete mess.  

Good news: she's got a lawyer.  A damn good lawyer who's a mutual friend and a fucking SHARK.  Fucktard is going DOWN.

Quote:

Originally Posted by HarleyQuinn22 

Good news: she's got a lawyer.  A damn good lawyer who's a mutual friend and a fucking SHARK.  Fucktard is going DOWN.

Excellent. I don't excuse or understand being a piece of shit and leaving your wife when she's just giving birth to your child, but that he's completely disowned the two children who CAN understand something's very wrong is infuriating. 

He's potentially ruined - certainly deeply scarred - a number of lives with his shitsucking selfishness. I am glad she's found someone who ensures he'll be paying for it for decades.

(I know I wrote above already, but I'm still glad.)

Nice scary red emphasis there, Harl!

It really does suck for those kids and Jules, though. Best of luck.

Quote:

Originally Posted by MichaelM 

He's potentially ruined - certainly deeply scarred - a number of lives with his shitsucking selfishness. 

This is what really scares me.  I was channel surfing the other night and stumbled on this show on Oprah's network where this woman who had abandoned her kids came back three years later and was just shocked that the kids resented the hell out of her and couldn't understand why they didn't love her.  The teen boy was talking about how inadequate he feels and how he is dysfunctional in relationships with girls because he thinks he's not worthy of being loved because his own parent left him.  I don't want that for these kids.  They're sweet, smart little boys who just want everyone to be happy and play all day.  I'm looking at where they could be in ten years because of this, and it really frightens me.

Jesus, Harley. Have just caught up on this thread and read the whole story in one hit. This guy's quite the repugnant little cunt. This is basically sociopathic, what he's doing. Am glad to hear your friend's got a good lawyer, who I'm sure is going to be REALLY be enjoying their job - phrases involving fishes, barrells and shooting come to mind.

Hope they decimate the fucker. Arseholes like this give us testicle-owners a bad name.

It really sucks, man.  The oldest just started playing soccer with a youth league and he really loves it.  He runs around in his uniform all the time now.  My boyfriend and I picked him up from practice the other day and I couldn't help but see these little boys kicking around balls with their dads and I nearly burst into tears because his father has robbed him of that.  You should have seen this kid talking a mile a minute to us about how awesome soccer is.  He said that he can't wait until his dad gets back so he can kick the ball with him, and I honest-to-God gripped the steering wheel of the car so hard I thought I would break my hands.  His little sister is never even going to meet the guy, if this asshole gets his way, and we've all heard the stories of what happens to little girls without a strong father figure around.   There are plenty of good men in their lives, but it's not going to be the same. 

I'm usually the one here spouting off advice, but I really need help here.  How the hell would you break this news to these kids?  Keep in mind, the oldest is only five.  It's ultimately their mother's call, but I know she has no clue how to do this, either.  There's only so much longer that they are going to buy this "trip" excuse before they get really worried about him.  They already know something's weird because he hasn't called them.  They weren't privy to the dog phone call.  Their grandpa has told them he's in a place where there are no phones, to which the oldest replied, "We should write him letters!"

In all honesty, I don't know if there really is a 'right' way. Obviously they have to be told, because like you said they're going to put two and two together sooner rather than later, and being left to work it out for themselves is probably going to do more lasting damage than explaining it to them.

I'm not a parent, and my experience with children is limited to friends' kids and teaching for a few years, but it always seems that just being truthful is always the best thing. Of course they're not going to understand the complexities of relationships and why they fail, especially when it's their own parents, but at the end of the day they WILL learn why someday, whether it's sooner or later, and while they may not get why mum and dad didn't want to live together anymore they at least know that they don't.

All I can think is, they need to be told that their parents still love them, that none of this is their fault (They'll probably think so anyway, but that can be worked on over time) and that you and all their friends and family love them and will be around. And once you've said it, you all need to keep saying it. The only fib I'd recommend telling is to make sure you guys tell them that their dad still loves them; it'll hopefully help the guilt factor, and is legally and morally the best tack for your friend to take IMO. Let the kids get older, learn for themselves what a shit their old man is so they have the opportunity to come to their own opinion.

But that's for further down the track, mainly. For now, they just need to know that something has happened, and that he's not living there anymore but that they are loved. I don't know, this is a horrible position you and your friend  are in, Harley. I'm not even gonna pretend that I can say the right thing to do, but hopefully we can help give you some perspectives that might help you find the right way.

I would love to be able to tell you to tell the kids that he's dead and he died saving puppies and defending world peace. However, much like you mentioned earlier, I have a feeling this fucker is going to raise his ugly little head again in a few years, once all the really hard work of raising young children is out the way. On the positive side, the children are young, I think being simply honest will be the best policy. I wish I could give you a script, but it never works like that. I had a similar thing to say to my kids, I agonized for months. They were much older and in the end I told them the truth and treated them like adults. It wasn't pretty but you all get over it as you have each other.
 

And now the weirdness begins...

I've stayed in contact with my ex.  Not constant, but occasional emails and texts.  Some of it necessary, some of it just, "Hey, how you doing?"  And while she's getting on with her life and her new job is going well and she's making new friends, she's clearly having regrets.  She's said things like, "Don't forget me" and "There are things I want to say but can't without breaking down."  And it makes me wonder if she's having second thoughts about all this.

Which has me of two minds.  One is the mind that still cares about her and doesn't want her to be hurting, and wonders if we really did the right thing if the feelings still feel like this.  The other is the one that remembers that, when she had a choice to make, she chose to walk out and chase the other guy.  That I wasn't good enough.  That the ephemeral promise of something new looked like a better option than trying to fix something we'd put seven years into, that she'd committed to.  All the feelings in the world can't wipe away the fact that she turned her back on me and ran to someone else.  Someone who, I firmly believe, she'd still be with if he hadn't turned out to be an extraordinary douche.  I think most of her regret comes not from what she did, but from what she did not working out the way she wanted.  She's not sorry she ran, she's sorry he wasn't what she thought he was.

Besides, she had from January to September to put the brakes on this whole thing, and never did.  She moved out.  She filed the papers.  She left the state.  Never once did she say, "Hey, what are we doing?"  And I sometimes wonder if she was waiting for me to say something.  It would be like her, feeling something and keeping it to herself.  And possibly setting me up to be the bad guy in her mind, the one who insisted on this course, when it was her who put us on this path in the first place.  The times we did briefly discuss it, I made it plain that my trust for her was gone.  That I couldn't let her back in after cheating on me twice with the same guy without forever after questioning every little suspicious thing.  And I'd never know if she came back because she wanted to, because she felt guilty, or because she had nowhere else to go.  Of course, this was always met with accusations of me "beating her up" with what she'd done.  She was allowed to wail on about how this other guy had hurt her, but I was supposed to never again mention how she'd hurt me.

Her being in Texas does make things simpler.  I doubt she'll come back here, and I'm certainly not going there on the off chance things might work out again.  Yes, there are times I regret what's happened, but I remember that I've done nothing to deserve what she did, and that where we are now is a direct result of her giving up on us when I was willing to do anything to make our marriage work. I did my part.  I fought my battle.  And I'm not going to feel guilty about how she now feels about the way she chose to respond.  I don't want her to be miserable, but I'm not going to allow that to make me feel bad.  It might seem a callous way to think about someone I was once committed to spending the rest of my life with, but if she's uncomfortable in the bed she made, well, now she knows how I felt for the four months between when she told me she wanted out and when she moved out.

Well, I've vented enough.  I wasn't really looking for advice -- there's not really a chance of reconciliation, not with what's happened, and not with us in two different states.  I guess I just wanted to get my thoughts out somewhere, and having done so, I feel more resolute about where I am.  So that's good, I guess.  Which isn't to say I wouldn't trade the last year back for it not to have happened.  But what can you do?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Richard Dickson 

 She's not sorry she ran, she's sorry he wasn't what she thought he was.

 

I remember that I've done nothing to deserve what she did, and that where we are now is a direct result of her giving up on us when I was willing to do anything to make our marriage work. I did my part.  I fought my battle.  And I'm not going to feel guilty about how she now feels about the way she chose to respond.  I don't want her to be miserable, but I'm not going to allow that to make me feel bad.

 

Keep repeating these things to yourself. You are absolutely on the right track, Richard, and I'm sorry that she's pulling at your good-guy heartstrings. 

Thanks for sharing with us.

Speaking as a father, of both a 12yo and a 2.5yo, I would try to take the tactic of truthfully explaining the situation to them in the same way one parent would have to explain to their children that the other parent has died. Children are A LOT more resilient than adults give them credit for, but at the same time they are such unknowable delicates that one thing could totally shatter them. It's a fucking tight wire act sometimes. Since both children are SO young, I would recommend telling them that their father had to go away to handle some things of his own and it's not known when he'll come back. Maybe even say that he may not be coming back. Try to explain that sometimes people decide to do certain things that make sense to them, but not to anyone else. Or even have their mother explain selfishness and how even adults suffer from it. I'm trying hard to come up with a diplomatic way of thinking so it could be explained to kids but it's damn hard. My way is to be brutally honest and tell the kids that the father is a horrible man that lost all privilege with his children because of it.

I'm sorry again for your friend. This whole thing falls into the same category for me as cheating. I don't get it. If one wants to sleep around, end the relationship and go do your thing. If one didn't want to be a father, then why go ahead and do it? Everyone makes their choices and we have to live with the responsibility of results of our actions. That's what being an adult is.

What Michael said, times two.

Quote:

Originally Posted by MichaelM 

 

Keep repeating these things to yourself. You are absolutely on the right track, Richard, and I'm sorry that she's pulling at your good-guy heartstrings. 

 

Thanks for sharing with us.

Thanks.  I don't want to necessarily assign sinister motives to what she's feeling right now; she could really be hurting and regretful, and that's the one thing that keeps me from being completely callous about it.  But I remember me being just as hurt, and her still showing me her back.  I can't walk back from that.

I had something similar to Richard when my first wife and I broke up. There was no cheating on anyone's part, but there was this whole thing where my wife at the time said she didn't think we should have ever gotten married (2+ years in and 7+ years into the overall relationship). She couched the whole breakup as her needing time to "discover" herself and letting me free to do the same. When I asked if this meant divorce, separation or something else, she said she didn't know. When I pressed her on it, she even left the possibility open of us getting back together once whatever self journey she went on was over. Once her mind was set though, she's the type of person who won't change it (probably due to pride, embarrassment, who the fuck knows). She then proceeded to spend the next month preparing to move out, and in with a couple of her best friends who she hung out with EVERY night, while I spent it all alone in our apartment in a dark period of mourning. The weekend she moved out, I spent with family and luckily had lined up someone to move in and help with the rent.

Funny thing was, after that month alone seeing her gone on happily with her life unconcerned about how I was handling things on my end, I started realizing that maybe this was the best situation. Since I while I loved the woman, I discoverd that I was no longer in love with her and I don't even know if that happened before, during or after the break up. I spent the next month mentally letting go, getting to know my new roommate and hanging out with family/friends. With a newfound sense of inner strength, I asked out a woman working at an office I was consulting at. I was all expecting her to blow me off or things to not really go anywhere. I'm now married to the office woman and we have 2 kids together. Everything happens for a reason, and sometimes when things look like they don't make sense or are horrible in the moment, can turn out to be all for the good later on. It just takes time. And in my case a fine ass woman that ALL my friends/family loved better than my first wife.

Last note, I came to find out that everyone I know hated my first wife for various reasons, but kept their mouths shut out of some sense of respect of choice for me. Also, when my wife at the time and I were going through our legal separation/divorce, she found out that I was seeing someone new. I still remember her email where she threw my new lady's name at me as if she caught ME cheating. I actually apologized to her for letting her find out the way she did (second-hand) when I was planning on doing the gentlemanly thing and telling her myself. I stayed calm and tried even remain friends with the woman, but I did tell her that she sounded jealous in her email. She did not like that, but even now I find the whole drama funny because it just confirmed to me that she always thought that I would be waiting in the winds for her should she ever decide to come back and the fact that I moved on (quickly or not is debatable since every situation/person is different) made it seem like she wasn't the one with the upper hand like she thought. Oh well. Such is life.

Quote:

Originally Posted by MichaelM 

 

Keep repeating these things to yourself. You are absolutely on the right track, Richard, and I'm sorry that she's pulling at your good-guy heartstrings. 

 

Thanks for sharing with us.

YUP YUP.  she made her bed, don't get back in it. 

Thanks for the kind words, everyone.  

What's with all these people needing to "discover themselves?" This is my number 1 problem with all this "we're all unique snowflakes" "I'm OK you're OK we're all OK" fucking dimestore enabling bullshit popular psychology. If you're still really discovering yourself in your twenties you deserve to get fucking beaten sensless you insecure cowardly fucking brat. Listening to grown people speak like that infuriates me. What fucking happened to taking full responsibility for your actions as a concept? No one needs to discover themselves. They want to fuck someone else. They are tired of you. They are tired of their kids.

I'm too selfish to commit to anyone else so I live my life accordingly. I don't go around making up bullshit. I don't want to marry because I'm too selfish. I don't want to start a family because I'm too selfish. Simple as that. I won't sugarcoat it like some coward.

Quote:

Originally Posted by stelios 

What's with all these people needing to "discover themselves?" This is my number 1 problem with all this "we're all unique snowflakes" "I'm OK you're OK we're all OK" fucking dimestore enabling bullshit popular psychology. If you're still really discovering yourself in your twenties you deserve to get fucking beaten sensless you insecure cowardly fucking brat. 

Huh. Considering that I don't feel like I really knew myself until my early to mid-30s, this is an interesting thing to read.

I don't disagree that there's a lot of selfishness masked as self-discovery. Nor do I disagree that a lot of people make selfish, hurtful choices under that cover. But I also think that not everyone matures intellectually at the same rate for a lot of reasons, and sometimes they "wake up" later than the norm, whatever the hell that is. (In my case, it was partially due from being submerged in the fundamentalist/evangelical subcultures for 12 years.) I'm sure, stelios, your reaction is from some wankers who completely deserve your vitriol. But not every single person who starts down the path of getting to know themselves after the age of 29 is full of shit.

I've got no problem with someone "discovering themselves."  But maybe you shouldn't make a lifelong commitment to someone if you think you're not quite done discovering yourself yet.

Quote:

Originally Posted by MichaelM 

 

Huh. Considering that I don't feel like I really knew myself until my early to mid-30s, this is an interesting thing to read.

 

I don't disagree that there's a lot of selfishness masked as self-discovery. Nor do I disagree that a lot of people make selfish, hurtful choices under that cover. But I also think that not everyone matures intellectually at the same rate for a lot of reasons, and sometimes they "wake up" later than the norm, whatever the hell that is. (In my case, it was partially due from being submerged in the fundamentalist/evangelical subcultures for 12 years.) I'm sure, stelios, your reaction is from some wankers who completely deserve your vitriol. But not every single person who starts down the path of getting to know themselves after the age of 29 is full of shit.

You know what I mean and I sure as hell don't mean people that have actually been indoctrinated.

ETA: I have a major problem with people obscuring their motivations under bullshit. Care for a practical example? "Honey, there's this guy at work and we seem to be hitting it off like crazy." You know how I would reply to something like that? "If it's a one time thing go ahead and have fun. Just be safe. Don't bring anything back. If it's a relationship you want be on your merry way. And if it doesn't work out, look me up." I am told the truth. I am given fair warning. I respond well. You serve me bullshit, you cease to exist for me.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Richard Dickson 

I've got no problem with someone "discovering themselves."  But maybe you shouldn't make a lifelong commitment to someone if you think you're not quite done discovering yourself yet.

No problems with this, but the biggest problem is that the folks who often need some time figuring themselves out the most are the last ones to realize it in a timely fashion.

Quote:

Originally Posted by stelios 

You know what I mean and I sure as hell don't mean people that have actually been indoctrinated.

I don't know that I'd agree that I was "indoctrinated" into anything (though an argument could be made), but I genuinely don't know what you mean if you had a specific subset of people in mind. Your post was really sweeping; I can certainly agree with some instances of it being bullshit, but not all.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Judas Booth 

I find it amusing when the person who LEAVES expects the person who got LEFT to wallow in self pity and not move on with their life. It's not a zero-sum game where one person has to win and the other has to lose.

Which was exactly the issue I had with my ex.  She seemed to resent the fact that things were going good for me while her little escapade exploded in her face.  She even pulled the "I'm still your wife" card when I went out of town with my old college girlfriend.  Oh did she get the riot act after that.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Richard Dickson 

Well, I've vented enough.  I wasn't really looking for advice -- there's not really a chance of reconciliation, not with what's happened, and not with us in two different states.  I guess I just wanted to get my thoughts out somewhere, and having done so, I feel more resolute about where I am.  So that's good, I guess.  Which isn't to say I wouldn't trade the last year back for it not to have happened.  But what can you do?

You sound like you're in the right place, and it sounds like you've already given her enough of yourself. I've never been in a situation close to yours (never married, no cohabitation, etc.), bit I remember getting to a point after my last big break up where my ex was sort of phasing in and out of my life depending on whether or not she was seeing someone new and all the while I was still sort of reeling from the break up. I think she was too, to some extent, but she was the one who ended it and I think that she wanted to feel wanted after it was over. Hence her hovering. And it was hard to get her out of my life. She was in my bones, man, so it really hurt to turn her away once and for all. But I think that it was ultimately the right thing, even if a lot of people judged me for it. I think I'll always miss her (but looking back, probably for no good reason), but leaving her behind at least gives me the chance for a certain peace of mind if nothing else.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Richard Dickson 

 

Which was exactly the issue I had with my ex.  She seemed to resent the fact that things were going good for me while her little escapade exploded in her face.  She even pulled the "I'm still your wife" card when I went out of town with my old college girlfriend.  Oh did she get the riot act after that.

Fuck that.  She doesn't get to make you a speed bump while she's zooming in the fast lane.

So Jules told the kids this past weekend about what's going on.  Didn't go very well.  Mini Mike started screaming and saying that it wasn't true.  He ran upstairs and got his little backpack and started throwing things into it, and sat by the window to wait for his father's car to pull up.  It was horrible. 

Fucking hell. Harley, I was actually thinking about your friend's situation and I kept feeling flabbergasted at the gall of the whole situation. Every way I turned the dilemma in my mind, sort of like a Rubik's Cube, and I couldn't see any way for those kids not be utterly devastated. Such a damn shame. My only advice now that it's been done is for your friend to get those kids into therapy as quickly as possible. I think that's going to be the best way for them to work through this and end up in a mentally sound condition. Good luck.

Quote:

Originally Posted by donde 

. My only advice now that it's been done is for your friend to get those kids into therapy as quickly as possible. I think that's going to be the best way for them to work through this and end up in a mentally sound condition. Good luck.

This. The kids need something to help them process what's going on. They're too young to understand it, that's for sure, but they and their mother need healthy, productive tools and channels for all the things they're feeling.

That guy. I just can't believe it. What a piece of human debris.