I recently tweeted that some Lament Configuration of action films I've watched in sequence recently has apparently broken all of my tolerance for bland, boring bullshit. So take that into account when I say, "fucking boring."
Fucking boring.
Like Cap, it's by no means aggressively bad, hate-the-audience stupidity, so don't infer that from my comments. What I'm wondering is what Favreau, Spielberg, and Howard saw in this script that was worth their considerable combined power and efforts.
Craig is a human being I like to watch do things, and that's not any less true in this movie, but there's absolutely nothing special about what he had to do or say here. Ford is decent, which I guess if you have some nostalgic desire to see him not be garbage in a movie, that's worthwhile. And his father/son thematic stuff is the only blip of interest in the whole thing, so there's that.
The aliens are bland, their ships are bland, their HQ is bland, the fights are bland... the action in general isn't cut to ribbons, or incomprehensible, it's just not exciting. The action climax for Craig is him quite literally standing stationary at the end of the hall and blasting a dozen aliens one-by-one as they crawl down a hall. I'm not downplaying the scene- that's how it happens.
The idea that this is a great western in-disguise is an affront to the genre, and laughable when a movie like True Grit so recently graced screens.
People keep lamenting the gross of Transformers and sarcastically remark that we get what we deserve by supporting it. Well I'd counter that if geeks keep propping up and supporting worthless, opposite-of-inventive action in their films, then we deserve the bland, unexciting pap that will result (and already has). We can go ahead and feel very smart and discerning for making a laughing stock of Sucker Punch or Dark of the Moon, but the joke will ultimately be on us when we've dismissed every director who gives a shit about engineering an action sequence with an understanding of kinetics, the accumulation of momentum, visual flow, and all the other artful effort that goes into making spectacle that actually causes chemical, adrenal reactions and raises hairs. The idea that those films sacrifice character and emotion for their spectacle is accurate enough, but it's ridiculous to suggest that these geek blockbusters and superhero events are bringing anything special to the character/thematic table themselves, much less anything worth mounting dull action onto.
I'm frustrated. I literally walked from a screening of The Smurfs into this and the bar was still not dragged low enough for me to give this a pass. Go see Crazy, Stupid Love if Attack The Block isn't in your city this weekend.
