The Dark, Black Hole Of Fan Fiction

My Chud blog of late has been playing a bit with this concept, although I have been sticking as close as I can to what actually happened. 

I think as long as you accept it is a bit of fun and don't take it seriously there is no harm.

I can say with complete honesty and genuine relief that I have never participated in this phenomenon. I do however, know people that actively do. They're all girls and the material almost always devolves into pornographic fantasy (I don't read the shit, I simply won't put aside that kind of time, I just let them tell me about it).

For an English assignment in high school, some friends and I did a jokey Star Wars themed video complete with lightsaber fx. This was the spring of '99. Star Wars fever was in the air, and the internet was not yet flush with lightsaber duel fan videos. People loved it.

Emboldened by the positive response, we decided to mount a longer, more serious fan film over the summer. We planned for a few weeks, bought costumes and props, did some stunt tests and roughly choreographed the fights, but after a day or two of shooting, the project fell apart due to infighting and other obligations. I don't think anyone involved regrets not finishing the project. I'm glad I never fully fell into that black hole, as you put it, even if I did dip a toe.

Oh man, I can't wait til you know who descends upon this thread. I'm getting my popcorn warmed as we speak.

 

I began some ultimate 'beginning of the Star Wars' universe back in high school. It explained the origins of the Force, hell even the origins of the double star of Tattooine (an unleashing of Force energy turned a neighbor gas giant into a sun!), and a few other ridiculous things between two step-brothers fighting for supremacy. Never finished it. Ironically enough, stopped writing it around the same time I got into my first relationship. I wonder if that's a coincidence?

 

But I do have this awesome treatment for a Crow sequel! Dude, it's so awesome and dark and edgy.

I wrote out a new last chapter of THE POSTMAN once for an assignment in school. I liked it at the time, but now the cynic in me says the hopeful message was unrealistic

The IRON MAN trailer treatment was your masterpiece. Don't sell yourself short!

 

Guilty. Oh so guilty. Wrote a little short story about Seraph (from The Matrix...yes, I know) back in the day working for The Merovingian after being exiled from the "paradise" version of the matrix (he used to be an angel you see) and oh my God I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. Forgive meeee! *jumps out window* 

 

My Iron Man 2 fanwank stars Peter Stormare as Anton Vanko Jr, Ivan's brother (it was Anton who gave Ivan the tickets). During the second act he and a crew of Russian goons liberate Ivan from Hammer's compound. When the Black Widow and Happy get there the Widow takes out what goons are left and discovers that both have both taken off for the expo. In an extended climax Stark and Rhodey fight both Ivan and Anton (Anton in a crimson suit).

 

I'll get my coat

Why is this such a taboo? I myself have never dabbled in fanfic and have read some pretty bad fanfic/slashfic in my time (but I've read original stuff that's just as bad, if not worse), but the derision that this kind of stuff gets (and the hate piled on to those that partake in the past time) is outsized with its effect. Seems to me that it's the product of a lot of nerd self-hate and cynicism.

I played a lot of Star Wars RPG during middle school/high school and had fun with it. Creating stories as a GM for the RPG sessions was fanfic of sorts. Look, whatever outlet you may find for your creativity is better than stifling it with none at all. I also did a video with a bunch of friends for an English class where we had to film Shakespeare scenes. We added some lightsaber fights to liven it up. Again, all in good fun.

Haters gonna hate, I guess.

I honestly don't think I've ever engaged in fan fiction.  The closest I've gotten to that is mostly side-seat directing on existing material like Harry Potter.  But I think everybody does that to a certain extent when something doesn't work for them.

In, I believe, 3rd grade I wrote my own James Bond (very) short story and my idea for a sequel to GODZILLA VS. BIOLLANTE. Thankfully it ended there.

 

Spook, it's not like the only options are to stifle your creativity or engage in fanfic. Channel it into something original. The other reason for derision is it reeks of unhealthy levels of obsession.

I wrote a 125-page "Batman 5" fan script back in 1997 over the course of like five days that pitted the Caped Crusader against...wait for it...King Tut. In the wake of "Batman & Robin," it didn't seem to be that much of a leap.

 

In '98, I knocked out 160+ pages of a fan script for a new Superman movie that I ultimately abandoned after it kind of hit me that I wasn't even close to being done. And it wasn't even close to being readable.

 

I've since moved on to writing terrible screenplays about my own characters, which have been met with the same level of indifference by my friends and family.

Don't know if this counts, but my little brothers ADORE Doctor Who, and the DW books out there are still a little too advanced for them to really follow, so I wrote them up something that they could understand. And I had fun doing it. It was basically the Eleventh Doctor and Charlie Chaplin overthrowing a Darkseid-like regime on an Apokolips-like planet, with Chaplin's encounter with The Doctor leading him to make Modern Times and The Great Dictator (gotta make liberals outta these kids somehow). It was short and simple, and they had fun when I read it to them. I discarded it shortly after.

 

What's my penance?

When I was or six or seven, I wrote a multipage 20 000 LEAGUES rip off about the adventures of Captain Oreo, and his epic submarine confrontation with a giant squid ( he encountered one so enormous he accidentally sailed inside it's mouth). Yup..

Is it a crime to think that that actually sounds fun? In which case, I must pay penance, too.

Outside of sequelizing all of my favorites films with my action figures back in the day, I'm pretty sure I wrote a Mortal Kombat 3 treatment.  It's probably in one of the boxes we have in storage downstairs.  I'm kind of afraid to actually find and read it.  That said, I guarantee it is probably better than MK: Annihilation...................but then again, what wouldn't be?

When I was younger, I used to use a hodge-podge of different action figures and stuffed animals to tell my younger brother stories about heroes that went back in time and killed Hitler.  It was all very... Dragonball Z-esque.

 

Not really fanfic, but there were a LOT of different examples of intellectual property in there.  Whatever we were watching or playing at that time was incorporated into the plot.

That's pretty much the way my action figure escapades went as well.  I would have killed to have actual Alien, Predator, horror icon, etc. toys when I was little.

Randlett, I would watch the shit out of a Doctor Who/Charlie Chaplin superhero team up. Aah, dammit...

I have a really *really* good idea for a novel starring Charlie Chaplain as a fictional character, but I've not done any writing. If you want to be my writing partner, I will tell you my idea (split the profits 65/35)

I can guarantee with 100% certainty that my treatment of 'Highlander 2' was far, far superior to the sequel that we actually got.  Oh yes.

But was it as crazy and fun?

 

Dude...it was crazy, fun, and actually had continuity with the first film!  It had a reason for restarting the whole Gathering process!  It resurrected every immortal who had ever lived!  It was totally fucking awesome.