IMMORTALS Post-Release Discussion

It's Mortal Kombat, the movie. In 3D.

Make of that what you will.

How are the Greek Gods portrayed in this film? Just curious about their power levels. Tarsem said in an interview that they have "realistic" powers (e.g They can't fly. But they can float).

You guys might also want to check out the Immortals: Gods & Heroes Hardcover comic this week. It's a prequel to the film. Giving more info on the Titan/Greek Gods War.

Realistic powers? Well, um... they have Mortal Kombat powers. As in, they can punch-explode your HEAD. They're super strong, and they fly down to Earth. Posideon makes a wave.

They're all pretty youthful and sexy. When Zeus (Luke Evans) is like, MY DAUGHTER!, in regards to Athena (Teresa Palmer), I was weirded out, considering he's probably like four years older than her.

But yeah, I mostly mean Moral Kombat in a good way. Though the dialogue scenes are completely deadening. And Mickey Rourke has NEVER been more bored, which is certainly saying something.

I've been invited to see this film four times over the past seven months.  The awful trailers have made me glad that I skipped it.

I got to check out the premiere of this tonight and honestly, it's a "good not great" sort of movie. Tarsem's visuals are impressive (kind of his thing, so that's pretty much a given) and his storytelling skills continue to slowly but surely get better with each film. I think most people are in agreement that The Fall is his best and I don't see this changing that but in terms of sheer scope, it probably is a better "directed" film than The Fall. Performances are solid across the board, this movie did build more interest in Superman for me. Overall, I think it out-300ed 300 (not a huge fan of that film) but I don't see any pressing need to revisit it, either. Worth a look if you're into the whole epic sword and shield mythology stuff.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gabe T 

It's Mortal Kombat, the movie. In 3D.

 

Make of that what you will.

Is there a badass catchy techno theme song?!

Quote:

Originally Posted by HarleyQuinn22 

Is there a badass catchy techno theme song?!

Tsk, tsk. KMFDM are not techno.

Fuck that shit.

That said, the commercials for this look pretty slick. I might check it out and then watch a Criterion disk to balance out the universe.

Yeah, I don't think "realistic" is an accurate word.

What's the deal with the dude with giant Sun Hat? Or is a crown or something? He kinda looks Aztec to me. Oh and not threatening or interesting. Someone answer me, because I won't see this film to find out!

Probably Apollo.  I imagine the hats will be the primary differentiators among the Gods in this movie.

Quote:

Originally Posted by HarleyQuinn22 

Is there a badass catchy techno theme song?!

Test your might....MORTAL KOMBAT!

If there is no 'splits to nut punch', then any comparisons to MK are inadequate at best.

that said, this looks like 300 meets Clash.

Huh. The good is sort of offset by the bad. Way too choreographed and emotionless. It's like the Star Wars prequel fights where everyone seems to be just going through the motions.

The reaction to the girl getting killed is also kind of hilarious.

Looks like a great video game, but a film?

I might see this a week or so after its release, but the clips have only served to dissuade me further.  For instance, the "Poseidon Jumps" sequence looked goofy as all hell - Kellan Lutz screaming, the unconvincing wave effect working against the actors, the choppy choreography...I'm not sure.  I'm not exactly a Tarsem fan, with the sole exception of some of The Fall (it's hit-and-miss for me), so I suppose I'm not convinced of his visual skills (more often than not, I find his visuals rather garish) being enough to save what looks like a film otherwise riddled with poor dialogue and overcooked visual staging.

Most of the reviews have been positive though. I still think we may be pleasantly surprised.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Joseph P. Brenner 

Well, I'm down.  I need some bloody violence, and this looks pretty pleasing.

300 and Clash of the Titans are a pretty low bar to clear, but if it is indeed an improvement on those two movies then it should be at least somewhat enjoyable.

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Prankster 

300 and Clash of the Titans are a pretty low bar to clear, but if it is indeed an improvement on those two movies then it should be at least somewhat enjoyable.

Well, I was a pretty big fan of 300, and I thought the Clash remake was crap-hole.  I put this somewhere right in the middle.  It's often ridiculous, but when it goes into all-out GODS FIGHTIN' mode, it's quite impressive.  I wish there were more of that, but the gods are only on screen for 20 minutes or so.  It's mostly the Theseus vs. Whiplash show.

Oh, I laughed pretty hard at the first appearance of one of Rourke's hats.  I think you'll know it when you see it.

All that eye candy onscreen, and Frieda has to have a butt-double.

I liked Rourke, their take on the Minotaur, the brazen bull, the Mortal Kombat gore.

Not impressed by Cavill, the non-nudity clause in Pinto's contract, the Titans, not having any monsters, the story, Theseus' speech, many of the set/greenscreen compositions.

I think if you enjoyed Clash of the Titans you'll like this one, but don't watch The Fall and expect this to be anything like that. This is linear, very light on plot, fast moving and less outlandish looking than it should.

Quote:

Originally Posted by El Gray 

Well, I was a pretty big fan of 300, and I thought the Clash remake was crap-hole.  I put this somewhere right in the middle.  It's often ridiculous, but when it goes into all-out GODS FIGHTIN' mode, it's quite impressive.  I wish there were more of that, but the gods are only on screen for 20 minutes or so.  It's mostly the Theseus vs. Whiplash show.

 

Oh, I laughed pretty hard at the first appearance of one of Rourke's hats.  I think you'll know it when you see it.

 

I'm pretty much in agreement with this. The GODMODE fights were essentially a greatest hits compilation of video game finishers and B button powerup attacks - which means they were amazing. The problem was the stupid rules that the Gods made for themselves which amounted to "Any time we can possibly do some good or keep Hyperion from unleashing the Titans, we're NOT going to act! But if you want someone to become an eagle and screech from a safe distance or give you pointless generic advice, YOU CAN COUNT ON US. Oh, wait....the Titans are free? Rock 'N Roll time....amirite, guys?!?!?"

That was almost as stupid as Hyperion letting Theseus live after capturing him the first time because letting a guy live who just decimated half your guard and wants your head is "hell" whereas killing him after killing his mother would be....merciful?

Sigh.

I was amused, however, at Cavill's Worthington-caliber accent drop when he suddenly changed continents and citizenship for his "rousing speech" where he could barely be heard. I mean, these are all (this, 300, Clash of the Titans) stupid flicks, but this has the most outlandish action of them all, even without monsters. I guess that's kinda a recommendation?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Barkatthemoon 

All that eye candy onscreen, and Frieda has to have a butt-double.

Seriously.  What the fuck?

I liked it. In a purely junk-food kinda way. A good bad movie if you will.

Normally I hate it when positive reviews boil down to "Well...it was pretty!" (i.e. Avatar) but Immortals worked because the actors put more into the material than on the page (minus Rourke who couldn't appear any more bored and ready to cash his paycheck). In addition to yes, the action and visuals from Tarsem - seriously though he's badly in need of a good script.

This was the fucking nuttiest movie I've seen in a while. I was laughing throughout, particularly at the supermodel-gods and Rourke's kitty-cat helmet. Yet for some reason I enjoyed how much Tarsem embraced the outlandishness. In other words, not groundbreaking but much better than 300.

Man, everyone in this thread hates on 300 so much.  I haven't watched it since my last (repeat) viewing in the theater, but I sure thought it was cool at the time.

I like 300 too, and I think the fighting in this looks fucking dreadful.

I think I've mentioned this before, but I have a ritual of doing Sunday matinees for movies that I normally would not see, but have enough of a vague interest to perhaps take a chance and see it on the cheap. Today, Immortals will be that movie. Aside from it looking like a videogame and perhaps arriving three years too late, I know basically fuck all about it. Should be seeing it in a few hours. 

Edit: I would say that it's a shame about Pinto's gluteus geminus, but either she's not into getting naked in general, or they couldn't afford it, either way....respect.

I like 300 just fine, and what's more, it has an interesting story, more or less. Just try and make the Hot Gates not dramatic.

It's also much better than Immortals. I pretty much disliked this a lot. The action scenes involving Gods doing Mortal Kombat finishers were all fun to watch, and I actually liked Mickey Rourke, who seemed as invested as anyone and just has a lot of presence naturally. Cavill is really athletic, and he could conceivably be good as Superman. But when it wasn't delivering kick ass bloodletting juvenilia, there was just nothing much fun here. I guess that I don't like Tarsem, mostly because I don't think he gives a shit about story or character, and I've found every single one of his movies to be lengthy slogs. I would say about 75% of the movie took place on the sides of cliffs, and another 20% in ceremonial rooms, and there was just a huge sense of sameness and low stakes to the whole affair.

Also, I'm pretty sure Theseus completely fails as a hero. He doesn't prevent the Titans from awakening, he doesn't save anyone's life (except maybe Pinto), he doesn't live up to Zeus's hopes, and the most important thing he does in the movie, from a narrative standpoint, is lead Rourke to the magic bow. He manages to off Rourke, but only after the damage has been done (all Rourke seemed to give a shit about was fucking up the Gods, and most of the Gods die, so mission accomplished). But then, Theseus doesn't even really care about the Gods anyways. 

And what about that vision of Hyperion and Theseus joining up? Comes to nothing. Or the way the turncoat from the beginning keeps coming back? Completely pointless. If you like watching models standing around on greenscreen cliffs, Immortals is pretty awesome. Otherwise, yeah, a lot like watching a lot of cinematics from Mortal Kombat. 3D didn't help either, at all. At least Clash of the Titans had monsters and the wherewithal to embrace its cheesiness. I think I hated Immortals.

No Minotaur? Not interested.

There's a gigantic dude with horns and poisoned barbed wire on his helmet.

Anyway, it made for a great way to waste two hours on a Sunday afternoon. Saw it in 2D, and I don't think I missed much "depth" except maybe in the very last shot of the movie.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Arjen Rudd 

I like 300 just fine, and what's more, it has an interesting story, more or less. Just try and make the Hot Gates not dramatic.

 

It's also much better than Immortals. I pretty much disliked this a lot. The action scenes involving Gods doing Mortal Kombat finishers were all fun to watch, and I actually liked Mickey Rourke, who seemed as invested as anyone and just has a lot of presence naturally. Cavill is really athletic, and he could conceivably be good as Superman. But when it wasn't delivering kick ass bloodletting juvenilia, there was just nothing much fun here. I guess that I don't like Tarsem, mostly because I don't think he gives a shit about story or character, and I've found every single one of his movies to be lengthy slogs. I would say about 75% of the movie took place on the sides of cliffs, and another 20% in ceremonial rooms, and there was just a huge sense of sameness and low stakes to the whole affair.

 

Also, I'm pretty sure Theseus completely fails as a hero. He doesn't prevent the Titans from awakening, he doesn't save anyone's life (except maybe Pinto), he doesn't live up to Zeus's hopes, and the most important thing he does in the movie, from a narrative standpoint, is lead Rourke to the magic bow. He manages to off Rourke, but only after the damage has been done (all Rourke seemed to give a shit about was fucking up the Gods, and most of the Gods die, so mission accomplished). But then, Theseus doesn't even really care about the Gods anyways. 

 

And what about that vision of Hyperion and Theseus joining up? Comes to nothing. Or the way the turncoat from the beginning keeps coming back? Completely pointless. If you like watching models standing around on greenscreen cliffs, Immortals is pretty awesome. Otherwise, yeah, a lot like watching a lot of cinematics from Mortal Kombat. 3D didn't help either, at all. At least Clash of the Titans had monsters and the wherewithal to embrace its cheesiness. I think I hated Immortals.

These are all excellent points.  I enjoyed myself with Immortals, but I knew it was beyond lightweight when it came to story while I was watching it.  Dourif, Cavil and Pinto had no chemistry as a group and I never felt like I was on an adventure with them.  I do like Tarsem's aesthetic sensibilty though and to see it married to a masculine (albeit in the underwear model sense of masculinity outside Rourke) tale of old world magick and bloodletting was kind of exciting.  It's as deep as dishwater, but I loved looking at it and thought it sounded great. 

Standout moments for me were:

Anything with Rourke, but especially his 1st scene with the traitor leading up to the nut smash.  I could listen to his voice in theater surround sound all day.

All the costumes and headpieces for Rourke's crew, especially the jailer.  It was just a great look, even Rourke's Tacooni Mario with vagina dentata face mask was cool. 

Cavil's fight with the Minotaur man truly had an air of the mythological to it.  An exceptionally well shot fight scene with great impact and tension. 

I always appreciate a dose of John Hurt.

That wave that Poseidon made sounded incredible, can't wait for the blu.  The oily aftmath was visually pleasing, if ridiculously implausible.  I loved how Pinto miraculously showered it all off and cleaned her clothes of it to go sit down in a pile of oil next to Cavil anyway. 

Good times for a 5 dollar matinee and will make a great bluray double feature at home with 300.  Nothing spectacular, but it will scratch that mouth breather/aesthete itch whenever it arises.

This movie reminded me of being ten years old and going to the museum. There's all this cool looking stuff on display with talks of gods and battles, but man, it is a slog to get from the alliances of the Greek Isles to some good ol' fashioned butchery. The violence on display, especially the 'epix godmodez!' felt, yes, like videogames but there was no weight to any of the Titans. They felt like clear and total CGI constructs. I get that they're being killed in Kratos-esque ways, but can't we get better CGI these days?

Waaaay better than...Conan: The Barbarian which is pretty much the same story. Though I am glad they didn't show us 'young Theseus being born and growing up and doing all this shit for thirty minutes before we even get a glimpse of Superman' like every fucking movie insists upon doing these days.

The Minotaur fight was aces. Love the very clearly weighted and brawl-esque manner to it. (Totally forgot Theseus was the minotaur guy)

I somehow managed to enjoy this while sitting in the theater. It's very pretty, a little more gruesome than I was expecting, and Rourke not doing much of anything comes to something b/c of his aforementioned natural presence (I did like his not-so-subtle predilection for eating seeds and nuts and so on). There's an Oedipal thing going on w/ Theseus and Hyperion, what with his choosing to spread his own seed (assert his own manhood) rather than sacrifice it to Hyperion (the dark father figure), but it's all so paper thin, that it's rather easily obscured by Tarsem's eye candy. Pinto is, once again, asked to do nothing but look like a beautiful doe-eyed angel, which she does. Done and done. 

I also liked that the gods all look like models. It makes sense to me that so called gods would, if they chose to look human, prefer the most youthful, superficial and aesthetically appealing look. Certainly not the aged Olivier model. That's probably why it bugged me that Athena, in her first scene, has a piece of dialogue that explains this choice. It's a pretty dumb piece of screenwriting logic to have her justify it to the audience.

Immortals is not a great film, but for someone who enjoys the varied  and satisfying but largely superficial work of Mario Bava (Hercules in the Haunted World, Knives of the Avenger), it's not a turn off your brain movie either. I get the distinct feeling that while Tarsem may not be terribly concerned with story, unlike Snyder, he's cultured and at least understands the higher strata.

I just felt that it was boring. Shiny, but boring. I don't think there's much else to say about it.

If you liked 300 you might like it.  It's not as good as 300 though, and lighter on story. Pretty though.

Liked it way more than I thought it would.  Even if I would agree that most of the criticisms levied at it are 100 percent valid.  I do disagree on Rourke phoning it in.  I thought he looked utterly ridiculous in the previews, but by the time the third stupidest of stupid hats (the first two going to Ares and Poseidon, respectively) shows up, I wasn't even thinking about it.  Yeah, he's growly and scenery-chewing all to be damned, but damn if it wasn't entertaining to watch.

Minotaur was played by 7' actor Robert Maillet, AKA WWF wrestler "Kurrgan". He also played an Immortal in 300.

I had a "is that Stephen McHattie?" moment, and I guess I was right. I recognized his voice first, his face second.

Tarsem must have borrowed that "take a pretty actress and make her ball-achingly hot" lens Michael Bay used to shoot Megan Fox. Frida's a lovely girl, but she was really something else here.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Barkatthemoon 

Minotaur was played by 7' actor Robert Maillet, AKA WWF wrestler "Kurrgan". He also played an Immortal in 300.

 

I had a "is that Stephen McHattie?" moment, and I guess I was right. I recognized his voice first, his face second.

That makes sense about Maillet.  His fight scenes with the hero are my favorite part in both Immortals and 300.  Mchattie stood out in a bad way though.  I love the guy and all, but that took the "from the producers of 300" thing too far and seeing him jarred me out of the movie.  Also, his role was crap and not worthy of him. 

he is also  the giant frenchman RDJ fights in Holmes
 

Quote:

Originally Posted by Barkatthemoon 

Minotaur was played by 7' actor Robert Maillet, AKA WWF wrestler "Kurrgan". He also played an Immortal in 300.

 

I had a "is that Stephen McHattie?" moment, and I guess I was right. I recognized his voice first, his face second.

 

Tarsem must have borrowed that "take a pretty actress and make her ball-achingly hot" lens Michael Bay used to shoot Megan Fox. Frida's a lovely girl, but she was really something else here.

 

Wait, that was McHattie? That's the second time I've mistaken him for Lance Henriksen.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shloggs 

That makes sense about Maillet.  His fight scenes with the hero are my favorite part in both Immortals and 300.  Mchattie stood out in a bad way though.  I love the guy and all, but that took the "from the producers of 300" thing too far and seeing him jarred me out of the movie.  Also, his role was crap and not worthy of him. 

 

Yeah, the whole We can negotia-- *HEADCHOP* thing was a bit obvious.

McHattie is essentially Lance Henricksen after some botox and shredding his guns in the gym. 

Quote:

Originally Posted by Evi 

Yeah, the whole We can negotia-- *HEADCHOP* thing was a bit obvious.

Yeah, if he was going to serve as the A-hole beaureaucrat, we needed more set-up than one scene with him telling Theseus to fuck off, then immediately being proven wrong. I liked the head chop effect, but whatever response they were going for with that moment was not earned, sort of like all the emotional beats in the film.  That said, I still loved looking at it and suspect I will look at it again in the future.  

Genius.