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Phrases that ought to get you a punch in the face - Page 2

post #51 of 282
10/26/11 at 12:54pm

When someone around me says a politician is "worse than Hitler" or a "Nazi". No dumb ass he's just a ____________ (insert mainstream political party). Himmler wasn't even Hitler for fuck sake and he was pretty bad from what I hear.

 

 

 

 

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post #52 of 282
10/26/11 at 1:05pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gabe T View Post

 "Things are worse than ever!"


"NO MORE DEAD COPS!"

 

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post #53 of 282
10/26/11 at 1:05pm

"What?...no date tonight???"

The guy at the gym says this EVERY friday evening. SIIIIGH.....yes, I'm a dateless loser.

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post #54 of 282
10/26/11 at 1:16pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Art Decade View Post

"Alternative music"


 

you show me things I didn't even know I hated.

 

seconding the love (hate?) for positive bullshit phrases like, "everything happens for a reason" and "god has a plan for all of us". But it's stuff my mother says to cheer me up so I can't really hate it too much. It is irksome. 

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post #55 of 282
10/26/11 at 1:17pm

THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKIN' ABOUT!

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post #56 of 282
10/26/11 at 1:20pm

"Minorities"

 

Fuck YOU.

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post #57 of 282
10/26/11 at 1:30pm

Seriously.

 

No. Seriously. I'm tired of "Seriously."

 

That and "Really?" Really? Yes. Really.

 

Everytime I hear either "Seriously" and "Really" on TV I want to punch the TV for this is the laziest dialogue ever.

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post #58 of 282
10/26/11 at 1:34pm

Rednecks that declare "I don't subscribe to hyphenated Americanism."

 

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post #59 of 282
10/26/11 at 1:38pm

Anyone over the age of 12 who says "D'oh!" in real life.  Fer fuck's sake...

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post #60 of 282
10/26/11 at 2:07pm

"Isn't it a little early for _____?"

 

I get this at work all the time. Drinking coffee? I get commentary saying it's too early. My sinuses hurt and I need tylenol? Commentary. ETC ETC

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post #61 of 282
10/26/11 at 2:16pm

"Unless you've been living under a rock..."

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post #62 of 282
10/26/11 at 2:21pm
'My bad'. Good God do I hate that.
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post #63 of 282
10/26/11 at 2:29pm

Oh God, "My bad" is just the worst. It makes people sound 5 years old while self-nullifying themselves of any responsibility of whatever the "bad" was.

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post #64 of 282
10/26/11 at 2:33pm
Thread Starter 

 

Pretty much any line of Joss Whedon dialogue used in real life.

 

 

One for the Brits:

 

"Simples"

 

 

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post #65 of 282
10/26/11 at 2:38pm

This utterance doesn't always deserve a slap or punch, but reading some comments on IMDB has reminded me of this golden oldie:


"You just don't get it."

 

I understand that there are times when you are talking to morons when this truly is the case, but if you tell me I just didn't understand Sucker Punch, I shall provide that film's title to your face.

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post #66 of 282
10/26/11 at 2:39pm

"Sounds like somebody has a case of the Mondays."

 

Fuck you, asshole. You post-ironic jerkoff who latched onto one phrase from a legitimately great movie and has now run it into the ground.

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post #67 of 282
10/26/11 at 2:41pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Judas Booth View Post

'My bad'. Good God do I hate that.


 

I like that one and use it frequently. It's a good way to casually accept responsibility for an error. I usually couple it with "I'm sorry" or "that was my fault"

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post #68 of 282
10/26/11 at 2:53pm

"Grow up."

This is usually said by a humorless asshole who is swimming in brat kids, a bad marriage, oodles of debt, and a shitty job. I'd rather joke around, thank you. Life is too short.
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by DamnDirtyApe View Post

"What?...no date tonight???"

The guy at the gym says this EVERY friday evening. SIIIIGH.....yes, I'm a dateless loser.

"I'll be seeing your mom in about 30 minutes." is the appropriate response.
 

Yes "your mom" jokes are still quality stuff. They've had a resurgence in 2 of my friend circles.

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post #69 of 282
10/26/11 at 2:54pm

Kate's presence in this thread somehow reminds me of her.

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post #70 of 282
10/26/11 at 2:58pm

"That's so gay!"

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post #71 of 282
10/26/11 at 3:03pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bradito View Post

"That's so gay!"



Thankfully I came from a fairly enlightened corner of the country, so whenever someone would say that in highschool, I and others would make a point to interject with "Yes, these tator tots ARE very homosexual, you're so right!" ETC. People who used gay as a pejorative quickly learned it made them seem, in the parlance of my state, 'wicked retarded'

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post #72 of 282
10/26/11 at 3:17pm

Wow, I can't believe I didn't think of retarded. That word probably bothers me more than any others. However, I never really fault people or even get visibly upset with it's use. 

 

I'm of the mind that any profanity, slur, insult or vulgarity is completely fair if it's deployed right, for the right reasons (humor, let's say), and in the right company (I don't want to upset anyone). However retard is a word I never use personally and have always felt uncomfortable with. I think it just stems from having a mentally disabled family member and seeing that first hand. I never really qualm with its use because of my over-arching philosophy of fair use, but I'm very conscious of it. And if someone throws it around in an especially mean-spirited way, I think a solid punch to the mouth is certainly warranted. 

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post #73 of 282
10/26/11 at 3:22pm

Dude, Blacky, that was kind of gay.

 

I kid, I kid. My mother refuses to watch Tropic Thunder because my cousin has autism. I absolutely understand her feelings and her stance, and I don't say it nearly as often anymore, but it's a word so ingrained in my lexicon (especially, coming from Mass, how it just rolls off the tongue in combination with another word) that it won't ever go away entirely.

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post #74 of 282
10/26/11 at 3:28pm

A lot of you would absolutely hate to talk to me in real life.

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post #75 of 282
10/26/11 at 3:29pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nexus-7 View Post

A lot of you would absolutely hate to talk to me in real life.

 

You have no idea how much I wanted to murder you... ohohohohoho

 

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post #76 of 282
10/26/11 at 3:29pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by BlackyShimSham View Post

Wow, I can't believe I didn't think of retarded. That word probably bothers me more than any others. However, I never really fault people or even get visibly upset with it's use. 

 

I'm of the mind that any profanity, slur, insult or vulgarity is completely fair if it's deployed right, for the right reasons (humor, let's say), and in the right company (I don't want to upset anyone). However retard is a word I never use personally and have always felt uncomfortable with. I think it just stems from having a mentally disabled family member and seeing that first hand. I never really qualm with its use because of my over-arching philosophy of fair use, but I'm very conscious of it. And if someone throws it around in an especially mean-spirited way, I think a solid punch to the mouth is certainly warranted. 

Just FYI: I don't actually say 'wicked retarded', nor did anyone I went to school with. That's more a Boston thing, and I am thoroughly Western Mass

 

I've written at length on the board before about how I see nothing wrong with referring to people with mental retardation as being 'retarded' (it's just an accurate description), but generally if I'm trying to slag something off, I try and do it more creatively than to simply say that a given person place or thing is "retarded"
 

 

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post #77 of 282
10/26/11 at 3:34pm

My family has a much similar stance with Tropic Thunder, but I love it, you know, fair use! It's funny. I guess my problem isn't so much with "retarded", like the princess' "wicked retarded" Boston-esque slang, I man there's no harm there whatsoever. I don't say it, but it doesn't bother me. I think my problem lies more with the word "retard". It's much harder-edged and somehow more of a cruel word. It just rubs me wrong. I guess it depends entirely on how it's used. When some guys are calling my disabled cousin a retard to his face, that's upsetting and invites punching. When my friend calls me a retard for shattering his lamp while blackout drunk, I got to suck it up and admit he's right, and go to Big Lots and buy him a new one. 

 

I don't mind the word mongoloid, in fact I find it sort of pleasant sounding. I don't know. Complicated feelings, I have. 

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post #78 of 282
10/26/11 at 3:36pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by mcnooj82 View Post

 

You have no idea how much I wanted to murder you... ohohohohoho

 

You had your chance and you botched it!
 

 

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post #79 of 282
10/26/11 at 3:42pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nexus-7 View Post

You had your chance and you botched it!
 


http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lje7in5IA31qccyc5o1_500.gif

 

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post #80 of 282
10/26/11 at 3:43pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by BlackyShimSham View Post

My family has a much similar stance with Tropic Thunder, but I love it, you know, fair use! It's funny. I guess my problem isn't so much with "retarded", like the princess' "wicked retarded" Boston-esque slang, I man there's no harm there whatsoever. I don't say it, but it doesn't bother me. I think my problem lies more with the word "retard". It's much harder-edged and somehow more of a cruel word. It just rubs me wrong. I guess it depends entirely on how it's used. When some guys are calling my disabled cousin a retard to his face, that's upsetting and invites punching. When my friend calls me a retard for shattering his lamp while blackout drunk, I got to suck it up and admit he's right, and go to Big Lots and buy him a new one. 

 

I don't mind the word mongoloid, in fact I find it sort of pleasant sounding. I don't know. Complicated feelings, I have. 



Yes, that's simply vile and inexcusable

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post #81 of 282
10/26/11 at 3:52pm

"Let's touch base" or any other corporate lingo

 

"Vajayjay"

 

Anyone over the age of five who refers to excrement as "poop"

 

"Preggers"

 

"My BFF"

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post #82 of 282
10/26/11 at 3:54pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Clarence Boddicker View Post

 or any other corporate lingo


UUUUUUGH!  Corporate lingo!

 

 

 

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post #83 of 282
10/26/11 at 3:56pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Clarence Boddicker View Post

"Let's touch base" or any other corporate lingo

 

"Vajayjay"

 

Anyone over the age of five who refers to excrement as "poop"

 

"Preggers"

 

"My BFF"


I agree with all of these except for BFF. Sometimes you need to refer to your best friend, but don't want to use all those keystrokes. Unfortunately abbreviation BF has come to mean BOY FRIEND, and so the extra F is required for clarity

 

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post #84 of 282
10/26/11 at 3:58pm

Poop is a quality word.

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post #85 of 282
10/26/11 at 4:11pm

"At the end of the day..."

 

"...boots on the ground"

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post #86 of 282
10/26/11 at 4:12pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bradito View Post

"Everything happens for a reason."


 

 

What if the reason is that God hates you?

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post #87 of 282
10/26/11 at 5:08pm


 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cylon Baby View Post

"At the end of the day..."

 



Surprised that one took so long.

 

Some sports related ones:

 

Talking about a specific player, but adding "a" before his name, as if there's more than one of him.  I call this the Kiper commodification.  Similarly, I can't stand when people who play fantasy football say they "own" someone.

 

Anyone who refers to his favorite team as us or we.

 

Anybody who says a nice shot in golf is a "Golf shot."

 

Anybody who yells "Get in the hole!" after a drive.

 

The NFL analyst version of corporate speak.  A few new phrases seem to get pushed every season.  Stuff like-  "a quarterback driven league", "he can really spin the ball", "dial up the blitz", "manage the game", "in space", "get to the edge", etc. 

 

"Must win games"  that aren't.  "They have to score here" when they don't. "Walk off" anything.  I could go on...

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post #88 of 282
10/26/11 at 5:20pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cylon Baby View Post

"At the end of the day..."

 

 

Can't believe I forgot that one either.
 

 

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post #89 of 282
10/26/11 at 5:31pm

       Quote:

Originally Posted by Cylon Baby View Post

"...boots on the ground"


I haven't heard this used by civvies and outside press conferences and a few jodies I didn't hear it much when I was "boots on the ground" either.

 

Why does it bother you?

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post #90 of 282
10/26/11 at 5:32pm

"Drinking the Kool Aid."

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post #91 of 282
10/26/11 at 5:46pm

"Well, I'm a Christian"

 

Usually deployed to justify self righteous/small minded  behavior/thinking 

 

Just like the anti-Roman agitator known as "Jesus" would have wanted it.. rolleyes.gif

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post #92 of 282
10/27/11 at 2:23am

Gonna have to go with David Cross on this one: Misuse of the word LITERALLY

 

Also, folks who use, "Y'know what I'm sayin'." in place of a closing statement to a point left unmade.

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post #93 of 282
10/27/11 at 3:05am

Anyone who says someone is "preggers".

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post #94 of 282
10/27/11 at 3:21am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Clarence Boddicker View Post

 

Anyone over the age of five who refers to excrement as "poop"

 

 



I don't know if it's a parent thing or anything, but I'm using "poop" when talking about our baby's...well, poop.

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post #95 of 282
10/27/11 at 4:07am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Glisten View Post

 

Pretty much any line of Joss Whedon dialogue used in real life.

 

 

One for the Brits:

 

"Simples"

 

 


I hate that damn Meerkat.

 

 

"If you want my opinion"   -    If I did I would have asked for it.

 

Also "Can you do me a small favor"

 

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post #96 of 282
10/27/11 at 5:22am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cylon Baby View Post


 

 

What if the reason is that God hates you?



"Hate him right back"

 

 

Not a punch-worthy phrase but still punch-worthy:

 

The use of curse/swear words from SciFi TV. Particularly BSG in recent years. If you want to say "fuck" say "fuck".

 

 

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post #97 of 282
10/27/11 at 5:38am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bailey View Post

Some sports related ones:

 

Talking about a specific player, but adding "a" before his name, as if there's more than one of him.  I call this the Kiper commodification.  Similarly, I can't stand when people who play fantasy football say they "own" someone.

 

Anyone who refers to his favorite team as us or we.

 

Anybody who says a nice shot in golf is a "Golf shot."

 

Anybody who yells "Get in the hole!" after a drive.

 

The NFL analyst version of corporate speak.  A few new phrases seem to get pushed every season.  Stuff like-  "a quarterback driven league", "he can really spin the ball", "dial up the blitz", "manage the game", "in space", "get to the edge", etc. 

 

"Must win games"  that aren't.  "They have to score here" when they don't. "Walk off" anything.  I could go on...


Don't forget when they say "well, he has all the intangibles"....which is code for "brains, but less talent".

 

And relationship wise: anytime a girl asks "why do you like me?"
 

 

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post #98 of 282
10/27/11 at 5:53am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nardo View Post

 

Not a punch-worthy phrase but still punch-worthy:

 

The use of curse/swear words from SciFi TV. Particularly BSG in recent years. If you want to say "fuck" say "fuck".

 

 



Drokk that...

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post #99 of 282
10/27/11 at 5:55am

Always hated the word 'hubby'. So cutesy and twee.

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post #100 of 282
10/27/11 at 6:04am

"Democrat Party"

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