Has anyone here ever dealt with this before?
I found out yesterday afternoon that a friend of mine had taken her own life Monday night. She was 33, and has two very sweet kids, 8 and 9. I’m just so crushed by this, and so heartbroken for everyone involved, especially her kids.
She’d had issues with depression before, and had just gone through a bad break-up late last year. Followed by a misunderstanding with her best friend which left the two of them not really speaking to each other. She seemed to be doing well the last couple of months, though. She was moving into a new place over the weekend, and seemed excited when I spoke to her on Friday. She was pulling a 4.0 in her classes and working part-time as a tutor, which she enjoyed. It seemed like things were looking up.
Monday night, I noticed she’d changed her Facebook profile pic to a shot of her and the best friend, her cover pic to a shot of her with her kids, and posted a pic she’d taken with the ex-boyfriend. While I was still online, she updated her status to “…Love and peace.” I didn’t pick up on it. I honestly thought maybe she’d patched things up with the ex. I know hindsight is 20/20, but I wish I’d thought to text her, or call her, and make sure she was okay. I didn’t know she was saying goodbye.
The best friend emailed me, and she’s devastated. Heartbroken for the kids, and she feels so guilty that they weren’t speaking, even though she knows they loved each other despite the fact that they were having differences. She said she’s so sad that someone so amazing didn’t see that in herself.
I just never suspected she’d do something like this. Her sister committed suicide at 18, when she was 21. She was so affected by that, and saw the impact it had on her family and everyone who knew her. And she loved her kids so, so much.
She had phenomenal taste in movies, and loved our tiny local independent theater. She was a very bright spot in my life, and I’m so hurt by the loss. I’m just having trouble wrapping my head around it today.
If any of you have had similar experiences, I’d love to hear about them, and how you got through them. I know I lurk way more than I post, but I’ve followed the Chewer community daily for many years, and you are, by and large, a wonderful group of people, and always such a great sounding board for things like this.
Anyway, apologies for being such a downer on an otherwise delightful Wednesday morning. ;-p