REVIEW: DARK SHADOWS - Page 2

I persist in liking Owen Gleiberman; he was a lot better pre-EW, in his Boston Phoenix days, so I blame the magazine's increasingly pitched-to-morons house style. Occasionally he still has a way of getting right to the heart of what makes a movie work (or not). Lisa Schwarzbaum sure is a non-entity, though.

My impression is that my tastes almost never coincide with the magazine's, save for stuff that has universal critical mass and appeal (INCEPTION, for instance). But really, I stopped paying attention to both the reviewers a long time ago, so you might be right about OG having at least slightly more credibility.

Glieberman, in his tepid C+ EW review of Let The Right One In, said he couldn't understand why a man who's living with a vampire would be going out and killing people for their blood.

He ain't the sharpest crayon in the box, is what I'm saying.

 

It's the magazine owned by Time Warner.

This has a flaw right from the go that sank the movie for me. It starts with Barnabis and his narration of his life as a youth pre-vampire. Then it introduces his reincarnated love. The film should stick with one perspective or the other, especially when the girl leaves the narrative for huge chunks of the film. Tonally things don't work. There's a scene with some hippies that has only place to go, and it goes there. The sex scene has no wit. And the editing is clunky. Just bad.

 

...and yet its seemingly triggered a cameo return of the mighty Dre to the chud boards - that alone just made the films existence worthwhile.

I'm around.

 

 

That makes me happy.

I generally don't have much to say in the Salma Hayek thread except "BOOBIES BOOBIES BOOBIES! (bush)"

 

Is there really much else to say in the Salma Hayek thread anyway?

 

Seriously tho, lovely to see you still around sir.

Anything that brings Phil and Damon to post is a good thing. Nice to see you, gents.

Maybe it was because my expectations were lowered a bit, but I enjoyed the movie. I feel like the reviews were way too harsh. It's at 41% on Rotten Tomatoes, but I feel like 60% would be more fair. The knives were definitely out for Burton after Alice in Wonderland.

Considering that the actors don't have a ton to work with on the page, I thought the performances were all quite strong. Eva Green is sexy as hell, and she drips with attitude. Bonham Carter has fun aping Grayson Hall. Chloe Moretz is amusing. Michelle is solid, though she can only do so much with the part because she has to be "the matriarch." I liked Depp's performance fine.

It's a great movie to look at. The sets are incredible. The romance between Barnabas and Josette/Victoria is undercooked, but it didn't bother me much. I basically agree with the review below. However, I felt that the final showdown was satisfying enough.

http://moviecitynews.com/2012/05/review-ish-dark-shadows/

I really don't think the knives were out for Burton here.  Regardless of who directed it, its reviews pretty accurately reflect the quality of the movie IMO.  It's a mildly amusing little film with a giant hole in its script, with actors wandering around and giving performances that range from good to pretty bored.

 I just saw it and its alright, but Prince of Darkness is still the best movie with an Alice Cooper cameo. I didn't have a problem with the she is suddenly a werewolf moment. I did have a problem with that she had been one since she was a baby and no one noticed. Also when they are outside she suddenly isn't a werewolf. I liked Depp in it. The story should have had higher stakes than fishing businesses. It ends with a set up for a sequel it doesn't deserve, and I doubt it gets it.

Rented it.  I had to see it.  Burton, with a rocky career, has done enough to at least get that much from me.  I really like Big Fish & Charlie and Chocolate Factory.  However, this one definitely tried my patience.  To echo most of the same complaints, I agree that it was a mess from a storytelling perspective.  To me, it felt like this movie was written playing the "Sentence Game".  So many ideas, and some of them genuinely good, but no time or effort was made to focus on them for more than 3 seconds. I was reminded of this:

 

 

The music was decent, yet the score was uninspired.  The set design and mood was great, but the "Burton blue-screen" was horrid.  It was such a tease sometimes.  Moments harkened back to the Burton I like, but it was immediately deflated by another change in the plot, story, character motivation or "twist". And even considering all of that, I was still shocked at how unbelievably boring the movie was.