Men In Black 3 Discussion - Page 2

As I walked out of the theater room for the Avengers (2nd viewing with my friend who hadn't seen it yet), I noticed a line of several HUNDRED people of all shapes, sizes, and ages (lots of families with kids) going from the adjacent screening room, down the hall, past the ticket taker, all the way through the gigantic lobby to the theater entrance.

When I told my friend it was for a 7pm preview screening of Men In Black 3, she and I started laughing our asses off, probably to the notice of the people in line (we had to walk past all of them to get out of the theater). "They can't wait three more days for this crap?!" "They did see the second one, right? And then they lined up for this one?"

This is Providence RI and not New York or LA, it takes a lot to motivate that many people to come to the mall and line up for something. It's pretty damn surprising that there was any kind of anticipation at all in the general public for this thing.
 

A free movie for some big summer studio blockbuster will bring out the people!

So, during the scene where Kay is in the kitchen beating up that Chinese looking cook with a frying pan, a woman two seats down yelled out "God Bless America."

It made me feel a little weird.

You laughed at people waiting in line to see the movie?

Look, I like the first movie a lot, but this isn't really my franchise.  Even still, it's REALLY shitty to laugh at fans and make them feel like crap for enjoying something they love.  How would you like it if I gathered up some gorgeous models and they all pointed and laughed at you while you waited in the line for the Avengers?

Don't hate yo.

Its Big Willie, he's done some deal with some dark deity to have this kind of power. Must have.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kyle Reese 

As I walked out of the theater room for the Avengers (2nd viewing with my friend who hadn't seen it yet), I noticed a line of several HUNDRED people of all shapes, sizes, and ages (lots of families with kids) going from the adjacent screening room, down the hall, past the ticket taker, all the way through the gigantic lobby to the theater entrance.

 

When I told my friend it was for a 7pm preview screening of Men In Black 3, she and I started laughing our asses off, probably to the notice of the people in line (we had to walk past all of them to get out of the theater). "They can't wait three more days for this crap?!" "They did see the second one, right? And then they lined up for this one?"

 

This is Providence RI and not New York or LA, it takes a lot to motivate that many people to come to the mall and line up for something. It's pretty damn surprising that there was any kind of anticipation at all in the general public for this thing.
 

Will Smith + Tommy Lee Jones + Aliens. 

Laughing at other people as they line up to see a movie is a dick move.

It was a preview screening.  People will line up for preview screenings of the worst crap imaginable because it's free.  And because some radio station intern might lob a t-shirt at them.

Wasn't laughing at them exactly, more to ourselves. We were just surprised is all. Had a hard time even getting out of the theatre with all the people around. Some of the ushers even started freaking out a bit because they thought we might be trying to cut into the line, when we were just trying to get out to the entrance.

Anyways, I deserve to be laughed directly at for paying to see Hancock back in 2008.

This is one of those Star Wars geeks laughing at Star Trek geeks kind of things. Irony!

There were some heavily pronounced L's instead of R's.  Guffaw.

I like how Asian alien guy's voice went from REALLY RACIST to SLIGHTLY LESS RACIST when Will tells him to 'cut out the chopsocky stuff'. But yeah, that's the most uncomfortable bit in the movie. All of the other "comedy" bits are just lame and tired. I think I actually might have liked this movie if it had some funny parts! But it's amazing how almost every joke falls flat.

Some of the brief HEARTFELT bits between J and young K were nice and I liked the new twist on their relationship at the end. The movie looks good and the effects are well done, but none of the setpieces will wow you. The aliens are well designed, but they're floating around in the background as usual. Clement's stupid voice was kind of funny, but his character is underwritten and they give him lines like "Let's agree to disagree". Brolin should just replace TLJ if they do another one. Brolin's happier, younger K was more enjoyable. TLJ is in the movie for 10 minutes and is sleepy. But here's what really pissed me off: this scene isn't included in that 10 minutes of sleepy screentime!

They should have just have K killed off in the future, and have City Miles K come to the future to save J.  Of course, I'm sure this will create all sorts of timeline problems, but eh, at least it seemed like Brolin was trying.

"Now it's time fer me tuh save you, SLICKKKKK" is probably MIB 4.

If they make an MIB 4.

But I think this is the end for Big Willy's MIB. If they actually do another one, it'll probably be a FRESH NEW TAKE reboot.

I really don't have a problem with that.  The concept was always sound, even if the execution wasn't always that great.

Give MiB to Eric Kripke or something.

Men in Blah!   

Liked Brolin.  Liked Clement as the icky bad guy.  The rest, though:  eh.   A few of the gags land, but the whole thing has no energy whatsoever.  

I'd bet anything that the original ending was supposed to be J dying at Cape Canaveral.  That would explain the whole running discussion re:  Agent K and "what happened to you, man?"   The answer should have been that young K saw J die back in 1969 and knew all the time that J's days were numbered.  That would explain his whole melancholia and the "some answers are best not learned" hogwash.   I like my ending better.

Also, Emma Thompson is officially transforming into Julie Andrews, isn't she? 

I forgot to mention the really blurry, pixelated photo of ZED!

Did a bitter, drunk Rip Torn refuse to let them use his likeness?

Yikes. This thing totally deflated my day. I'm at just the right age where the first one was kind of a seminal moment in my life. Loved it at the theatre and it was one of the first movies I owned on VHS. So even though the production sounded like a disaster, I was really pulling for this one to the bitter end. All the criticisms you've heard are right on. The movies all over the place and almost every joke falls flat. I never thought I'd say this but I think I might actually prefer 2 to this. At least that one had the Ballchinian joke.*

The whole movie is just full of wasted opportunities. Jermaine Clement's role is a perfect example of this. Wadew1 mentioned that he was underwritten, but it's much worse than that. He wasn't WRITTEN at all. There's just....nothing there. They likely payed him millions of dollars to just stand there and do nothing. I'm honestly curious to see if he even had any lines in the script or if he just showed up and was instructed to say random general stuff that could be interpreted in different ways when they figured out how the movie was supposed to end. The scene where he talks to himself, in particular, is shockingly bad. Like an actor on stage stalling because he's forgotten his lines. It's weird that the guys who thought up Eggar could deliver something this shitty and pointless.

Much like the second one the special effects are also generally lousy. All the big set-pieces save for the Apollo 11 finale are terrible and have a serious lack of energy.

This whole thing is really a shame. I wouldn't ordinarily be this pissed off by a mediocre movie but it just feels like no one even fucking tried. This franchise had pretty much limitless potential after the first one and they've just shit it all away. I don't get it. Maybe the animated series was good? I might check that out in the upcoming week.

*Also the mailroom scene gave me a few chuckles. It's retarded but so much so that it comes around to being funny. At least to me.

Yeah, she's some girl who was writing him while he was in prison. She wanted to marry him or something and Boris used her to escape. She even had his name tattooed on her back. At least that's what I thought. 

I have another question. When they try and wipe J's mind they put him into that giant MRI style neuralyzer but then later Brolin has a smaller one that hooks up to a battery on his waist. So why didn't they just use the smaller one earlier? Was there some line about how the small one was a prototype or something and I just missed it?

Also why does J still act like a rookie? Shouldn't he basically know what the deal is by now? Every now and again he seems weirded out by stuff that should be routine to him at this point.   

Twice in a row they ruin the only dynamic that works, J as the rookie and K as the straight faced expert.  These movies have always missed the mark, even the first one.

See, that's why I always hated that they brought back K for part 2. His arc was over by the first film and by bringing him back they doomed the series to just rehashing the same beats over and over again. They should have just given Smith a new partner and moved on from there. J should be the straight-faced expert by this point. Him still being the goofy rookie guy after working there for 15 years makes no fucking sense. 

Be careful what you wish for.  That's how Harrison Ford turns into his old man.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Odo19 
 J should be the straight-faced expert by this point. Him still being the goofy rookie guy after working there for 15 years makes no fucking sense. 

That's totally true.  Hollywood adventure films rarely seem to get the passage of time and evolution of character right.  Look at Live Free or Die Hard.  All of a sudden McClane - who doesn't like flying, heights or high-tech - is a helicopter pilot.  Why?  "Because movie," as Tim says.   This would be like suddenly retconning Indiana Jones a happy, successful snake farmer.

Similarly, a friend and I were lamenting the passing of Eddie Murphy's greatness and got talking about what it would take to make a good Beverly Hills Cop 4.  We agreed that one important thing would be to grow Axel Foley the hell up.  At this point, he'd be about 50 years old.  He have to be running the Detroit Police by now or at least be the Robbery Homicide Captain.  Or maybe he'd have gone the "ex-cop-now private investigator" route to be his own boss.  He'd be a grown-up by now and not the wacky-impersonations, bullshit artist heeah-heeah-heeahing all over Los Angeles.   He'd probably be tougher, harder edged, grumpier...  And though that Axel Foley might be interesting and more true to character, that's not the Axel Foley the studios would want.    

Quote:

Originally Posted by Engineer 

 

That's totally true.  Hollywood adventure films rarely seem to get the passage of time and evolution of character right.  Look at Live Free or Die Hard.  All of a sudden McClane - who doesn't like flying, heights or high-tech - is a helicopter pilot.  Why?  "Because movie," as Tim says.   This would be like suddenly retconning Indiana Jones a happy, successful snake farmer.

 

Similarly, a friend and I were lamenting the passing of Eddie Murphy's greatness and got talking about what it would take to make a good Beverly Hills Cop 4.  We agreed that one important thing would be to grow Axel Foley the hell up.  At this point, he'd be about 50 years old.  He have to be running the Detroit Police by now or at least be the Robbery Homicide Captain.  Or maybe he'd have gone the "ex-cop-now private investigator" route to be his own boss.  He'd be a grown-up by now and not the wacky-impersonations, bullshit artist heeah-heeah-heeahing all over Los Angeles.   He'd probably be tougher, harder edged, grumpier...  And though that Axel Foley might be interesting and more true to character, that's not the Axel Foley the studios would want.    

I think Rambo and Rocky Balboa both prove how good a time-sensitive sequel can be, but in general I'm not sure whether Hollywood or audiences (or both) really want evolution in a franchise, but instead just a replication of the successful elements from the original film. Which, if you're going to wait years to do a sequel, is probably best left to a reboot, unless you want to try for a Star Trek style having your cake and eating it too.

Well, it's better than MIB 2. By a wide margin. So, there's that.

Love Brolin. Love him and Smith's chemistry. Love Boris, even if they dont give him nearly enough to do. Love Rick Baker with all my damn heart for his work on this. The action is sorta toothless, but has at least some basic semblance of kineticism, something 2 failed at enormously, and even the first one doesn't really pull off, except for J's footchase at the beginning.

What I really, REALLY loved is Griff, who represents the kind of ideas I've been hoping the series would give us more of since the first one. On top of that, he's such the genuinely warm character a series like this needs.

The whole is.....okay. It feels like a TV show idea, stretched out to an hour and a half, instead of a return to form for what was once a mega blockbuster franchise. Aside from what i mentioned above nothing is good enough, or bad enough to muster any sort of strong reaction. Which in its own way, is kind of annoying, considering the INFINITE potential for crazy ideas this series holds. But, again, this is nowhere near the trainwreck that is MIB 2.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Odo19 

Also why does J still act like a rookie? Shouldn't he basically know what the deal is by now? Every now and again he seems weirded out by stuff that should be routine to him at this point.   

So weird. They acknowledge J is somewhere in his mid 40s by 2012. Yet they have him getting roughed up (flying across the screen). He's able to dust off the debris from his shoulders, no problem. As if he's still the guy in his late 20s/early 30s from Men In Black.

They want to sell you these guys have been a team for fifteen (ish) years and been through a lot. Yet they don't want the side-effects of living such a lifestyle, i.e. not being as fast as you used to be, takes longer to heal broken bones/bruises, etc.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ratty 

I'd bet anything that the original ending was supposed to be J dying at Cape Canaveral.  That would explain the whole running discussion re:  Agent K and "what happened to you, man?"   The answer should have been that young K saw J die back in 1969 and knew all the time that J's days were numbered.  That would explain his whole melancholia and the "some answers are best not learned" hogwash.   I like my ending better.

I like your ending better too. The way it is, it makes no sense. So K kept watch over J his whole life (from a distance, apparently), then...decided to recruit him as his replacement because...he knew one day J would go back in time to save him...I gotta go lie down.

K neuralyzes the young J and says "Your father was a hero," so how does that translate to adult J grousing about how his dad was never there? Wouldn't he remember the black-suited fellow with the distinctive verbal cadence who led him away that day (and after that, we don't know what happened)? And what, did little J drive there himself? There's nobody else in the car, no mother there to also neuralyze...Still gotta go lie down.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Martin Blank 

So K kept watch over J his whole life (from a distance, apparently), then...decided to recruit him as his replacement because...he knew one day J would go back in time to save him...I gotta go lie down.

I actually like this more than the original generic reasoning behind K's recruitment of J.

I believe it was "I'm recruiting him because he's a HOTSHOT WHO PLAYS BY HIS OWN RULES and so was I"

Quote:

I'm going to attempt to answer these questions even though I shouldn't!

J saying his father wasn't there: Well...he wasn't there. And Will Smith's J is a bratty wiseass, so...

J not remembering K: He was really young?

J being in the car alone: His dad was driving it I guess. He went to congratulate K or whatever (my memory of this film is getting hazy already) and left the kid in the car.

There was stuff in the trailers that wasn't in the final film! The Chinese restaurant manager's apron being whipped off revealing an alien body. Agent J neurelizing a crowd talking about 'remember when you flushed that fish down the toilet' with it driving by strapped onto a flat bed truck.

Most of the aliens Rick Baker did  are not visible except in the far background. They spent millions on stuff that didn't show up on screen, could've gone to the halloween store and saved some bucks. TLJ could've been replaced by a cardboard stand-up.

I love the genre but truly hope this ends the MIB series.

Uhhh, both those things happened in the movie. Did you go to the bathroom during that part? I did notice the shitty bit with the alien graffiti from the first teaser never showed up though.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mr. Stockslivevan 
That's exactly what Eddie went for in 3, but for different reasons (wanted to be taken seriously like Wesley Snipes and Denzel) which harmed the movie as much as the dud of a script. Then again it might have worked if done right.

Man, did they miss the mark then.  METRO got that right though.  Granted, it's not perfect either... but it's got a better partner, love interest, lines, stunts, score, it's better directed (sorry, John Landis)... and a much better villain (the awesome Michael Wincott). 

Back to MIB3.  I liked it, but even I must ask.  What's the deal with J hanging a huge picture of his brief former partner, Frank the Pug, over his bed...?  They must've been closer than the final cut led us to believe.  

Quote:

Originally Posted by Odo19 
 I did notice the shitty bit with the alien graffiti from the first teaser never showed up though.

I was so happy that was not in the film.  That bit was a groaner.  But I wish my favorite line in that trailer weren't also taken out.

J - "I promised you the secrets of the universe.  Nothing more.

Voice on phone - "Well... what other secrets are there?"

That line got the shiznit pimpslapped out of it.

Speaking of Will Smith seemingly playing a 20-something year old in this film, a real mindfuck is to realize that Will Smith is only 6 years younger now than Tommy Lee Jones in the first movie. 

Just wait, in 6 years he's going to do MIB 4 with him as the old vet looking to retire and his son as the fresh hotshot that plays by his own rules that he trains as a replacement.

Agree with the majority here, this film's a nothing. It's not bad, nor is it in any way good. I just is.

A couple points, though, that irritated me watching it:

1) That lame uni-motorcycle chase. Was that added late in the game? Because someone felt the second act needed an action beat? It accomplishes nothing and seems really tacked on with scotch tape. Michael Stuhlbarg, mid-exposition, gets abruptly kidnapped at the baseball stadium, the MIB chase Boris down and blow him out of the scene, and Stuhlberg finishes his exposition on the street. Cut to Boris meeting himself. Seriously?

2) The ending battle with Boris. Boris shoots spikes at Will, sticking him a couple times, and the two go over the side and time jump, screaming all the way. Then we go back to the tower and J - without any spikes in him - dodges Boris's spikes, causing him to scream "That's impossible!" Wouldn't Boris understand exactly how it's possible, given that he just accompanied J on the time-jump? Can anyone explain this?

Also: Boris was a pretty terrible villain. He's a scary alien guy who shoots spikes. And...? He felt like a rip off of D'Onofrio's first film baddie - Disgusting insect man uncomfortably concealed under human skin - only without any real purpose within the film.

Oh, and wasn't Tommy Lee Jones's character married before? (Can't remember. Haven't seen the first two since they were released, and haven't thought about them since). Was this ret-conned to make him even sadder and lonelier?

TLJ's character had some long lost love he gave up to be in MIB. At the end of the first movie he gets Neuralyzed and gets back together with her. According to the "hot sheets" his cover story is that he's been in a coma for the last couple of decades. I haven't seen the second in a while....I guess they broke up and TLJ joins MIB again? Anyway I found it weird she doesn't get mentioned at all in this one. He pines for her in the first one quite a bit. 

Quote:

Originally Posted by Episode29 

 

2) The ending battle with Boris. Boris shoots spikes at Will, sticking him a couple times, and the two go over the side and time jump, screaming all the way. Then we go back to the tower and J - without any spikes in him - dodges Boris's spikes, causing him to scream "That's impossible!" Wouldn't Boris understand exactly how it's possible, given that he just accompanied J on the time-jump? Can anyone explain this?

Activate...

THE OMEGA 13!!!

Friend of mine saw this yesterday. Asked him how it was and he grunted "Better than 2". Then he shrugged.

Ringing Endorsement!

I'm inclined to think that only the user of the device remembers what happens.  Or something.

Also, the plot is rather similar to the series episodes "The Head Trip Syndrome."  Which, ironically, is only 22 minutes and addresses more issues in its time travel plot than the movie did.  Case in point, why J remembers the changed past.

This movie was OK. I'll like it better when I see the finished version though.

...wait, this was the finished version?

GI Joe 2 gets screwed but shit like this is just fine to release on the world? There is just no justice.

With GI Joe there's some method to the madness. Expect a double DVD for sale, including some kind of "Renegade Cut".

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lightning Slim 

With GI Joe there's some method to the madness. Expect a double DVD for sale, including some kind of "Renegade Cut".

I hope they add the Planet Zeist back to that one.

I would like to say I hated the shit out of this movie, but it's so forgettable that I'm no longer sure I even saw it. One thing I'm sure of is that it was a gigantic waste of time for all involved, especially poor Josh Brolin.

Man, I quite liked this, true, lots of plot holes, loosely cobbled together skits some of which hit some of which do not but, it was really fun in a goofy over the top way and I unlike many adored the villian, I thought he was the right mixture of the frightening and funny - perfect nightmare fuel for the children in the audience.