This may come as a surprise, but The Phantom Menance 3D‘s $43 million dollar take wasn’t all that impressive compared to other 3D re-releases like Lion King ($94 million) or Beauty & the Beast ($47 million). So instead of spreading the releases out every two years, Lucasfilm has decided to plop out the remainder of the prequels in 2013 so we can get to the good shit sooner rather than later. This according to an announcement via their Facebook page, which states the Clones and Sith* are to be theatrically released in 3D back-to-back, September 20, 2013 and October 11, 2013 respectively.

It’s insane to imagine that, tasked with the decision of whether or not they should pay a ticket premium to relive a shitty movie they’d already seen, people opted to stay home. When all’s said and done, I’m sure I’ll catch Empire 3D when it hits. Aside from that I’m not particularly interested in seeing the latest tinkering done by Lucas’ sweaty (and hairy) palms.

This also comes on the heels of the announcement that Disney and Lucasfilm are pairing up to release an assortment of Star Wars / Cars mash-up toys. Because it’s not enough that George Lucas has your money, he now expects your children to cough up some dough as well.

If a picture’s worth 1,000 words: fuck this picture.

*Clones & Sith also happens to be the title of a buddy cop spec script I’ve been shopping around. Joey Clones and Gary Sith are two hothead detectives really chomping at the captain’s ass when all of the sudden… eh, perhaps for another time.

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