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Film Critic Catch-All - Page 104

post #5151 of 9325
I like how every G.I. Joe character has a flashback. It's like "The Hills Have Eyes, Part II."
post #5152 of 9325

I know what you're doing brad

 

 

And I don't mind!

post #5153 of 9325
I just wanted to talk about G.I. Joe.

( ._.)
post #5154 of 9325
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bradito View Post

Stephen Sommers doesn't fetishize the military anywhere near as much as Bay does. 

 

Made me think of a pointless (but amusing) anecdote.  During my time in LA trying to be a filmmaker I was working at The Gap (ugh).  One of the guys I was cool with invited me to a house party.  He asked me if I knew who Stephen Sommers was.  I said "of course I do!".  He said Stephen would be accompanying us.  Shitty director, but how cool would it be to go to an LA party and finally not be stared at for the wrong reasons!  "Stephen Sommers" came by and turned out to be some imposter who just uses the name to get laid.  Ahhhhh, LA memories....

post #5155 of 9325
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bradito View Post

I just wanted to talk about G.I. Joe.

( ._.)

by taking the focus away from film crickets and pop culture video essayists!

 

a worthy goal!

post #5156 of 9325
I'm going to have to try that. Thanks, Ambler.
post #5157 of 9325

hahahaha

 

a smart move to go with passing as stephen sommers!

 

because nobody knows what he looks like!!!

 

NOBODY!!!

 

 

"are you THE stephen sommers: blockbuster director???"

 

"well... I'm A stephen sommers: blockbuster director..."

post #5158 of 9325
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ambler View Post
 

 

Made me think of a pointless (but amusing) anecdote.  During my time in LA trying to be a filmmaker I was working at The Gap (ugh).  One of the guys I was cool with invited me to a house party.  He asked me if I knew who Stephen Sommers was.  I said "of course I do!".  He said Stephen would be accompanying us.  Shitty director, but how cool would it be to go to an LA party and finally not be stared at for the wrong reasons!  "Stephen Sommers" came by and turned out to be some imposter who just uses the name to get laid.  Ahhhhh, LA memories....

Reminds me of this bit from the modern classic Almost Heroes:

 

Higgins: This particular event happened last summer on my uncle's farm in Virginia. My brother and I had just finished cutting a field of hay and were enjoying the evening meal under the shade of an elm tree. He went down for water by the creek and when he was gone, I took a bowl that was filled with delicious plum pudding and placed into it, not one, but two large pieces of sheep shit. When he returned I encouraged him to taste the plum pudding... And as sure as Im standing before you, he did! He ate it all. Shit Pudding!

Leslie Edwards: You got your brother to eat sheep dung. That is a very interesting story.

Bartholomew Hunt: Tell him the ending, that's the best part.

Higgins: Oh yeah. To be perfectly honest with you sir, I have no brother. It was me. I ate sheep shit! Swear to God.

Leslie Edwards: Clever twist there on the ending.

post #5159 of 9325
Quote:
Originally Posted by Curiosity Cosby View Post


Maybe, but that still doesn't answer why that first effort (or at least the first successful effort) was popular in the first place. Plenty of movies try to be the next big thing, but few actually are. What do they have that others don't? It's an interesting question, intersecting art, culture, and commerce.


Right time, place, amount of hype etc. I guess. Also, they're generally better than whatever follows because nobody went to them and went "Hey try make the next Harry Potter".

post #5160 of 9325
I stopped reading Bart's post when he mentioned Almost Heroes.
post #5161 of 9325
Thread Starter 

I was joking. I saw that movie in theaters and holy shit no.

post #5162 of 9325
This is no joking matter, Bart!
post #5163 of 9325

G.I Joe was such a pleasant surprise, so packed with energy and winning performances.  Great, inventive action sequences and characters that seemed to care about each other.  Even Tatum's woodeness helped in him being the audience proxy to this new world.  I was glad it got a sequel, but was really disapointed when the sequel ditched everyone and then effectively had to start over, with decidedly less fun.  I guess it shows how fragile movie making can be, in terms of ingredients and outcome.

post #5164 of 9325

"hey is that double bubble?"

 

"aw it's my last one!"

 

"c'moooooon, give it up!"

post #5165 of 9325
I may have bought the Cobra Commander action figure on eBay.
post #5166 of 9325
Quote:
Originally Posted by mcnooj82 View Post
 

thing is... how strong was Transformers as an IP before the movies?

 

Before the movies, was it something that normal people were aching to see a live-action movie of?

 

 

 

Well, tangentially, I know that when I heard they were turning PotC (srsly, a fucking theme park ride?) into a movie, I thought we had reached the bottom of the barrel and Hollywood was creatively bankrupt. Now, I haven't bothered with the sequels but the first movie was a ridiculous amount of fun and far better than it had any right to be. 

post #5167 of 9325

MORE VIDEO ESSAYS!!!

 

post #5168 of 9325
Thread Starter 

That is definitely reminiscent of the porn trope of the virgin that also, to put it politely, is very good in bed, specifically because a man brings it out of her.

 

You know what I mean.

 

Good video!

post #5169 of 9325
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bartleby_Scriven View Post

That is definitely reminiscent of the porn trope of the virgin that also, to put it politely, is very good in bed, specifically because a man brings it out of her.

You know what I mean.

Good video!

Haven't watched the video but the man doesn't bring anything out of her. She's the embodiment of love. He's tasked to give himself to her. Once he does, love defeats evil. That is the story. There is absolutely no need to politicize a very simple analogy.
post #5170 of 9325
Thread Starter 

Are we still talking about porn?

post #5171 of 9325
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bartleby_Scriven View Post
 

That is definitely reminiscent of the porn trope of the virgin that also, to put it politely, is very good in bed, specifically because a man brings it out of her.

 

You know what I mean.

 

Good video!

 

Just adding my "good video" comment to this. 

post #5172 of 9325
Quote:
Originally Posted by Carnotaur3 View Post

Haven't watched the video but the man doesn't bring anything out of her. She's the embodiment of love. He's tasked to give himself to her. Once he does, love defeats evil. That is the story. There is absolutely no need to politicize a very simple analogy.
The Internet has never yet met a pet, I bet, as wet as they let this- a simple analogy that it can't politicize.
post #5173 of 9325
Thread Starter 

How about you watch the video, boyos, or don't comment on a video that you haven't watched?

 

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm??????

post #5174 of 9325
How about you explain the argument the video is making so I don't have to?

I'm never going to accept the notion that random people on the Internet can assign me obligatory homework to slog through before I'm allowed to voice an opinion.
post #5175 of 9325
Thread Starter 

You're demoted. Go scrub the deck.

 

And make it so shiny.

post #5176 of 9325
That's it, I'm starting a mutiny.
post #5177 of 9325

Why should commodore break his streak and actually watch something before voicing an opinion! PRECEDENT HAS BEEN ESTABLISHED.

 

Regardless, it's a good vid. And it's balanced and doesn't tear into anyone in particular. I agree that the base reason for the trope is fragile male ego.

post #5178 of 9325
Thread Starter 

Carno literally only responded to the image of Korben and Leeloo and my post, which is completely out of context without watching the video. Then commodore responded to Carno's response to me.

 

What's the point?

post #5179 of 9325
The point is you construed my snarky response to Carno's post as being a criticism of the video itself, which was in error. Then you demanded that I watch the video before proceeding, you have made two errors. You are flawed and imperfect. And you have not corrected by sterilization, you have made three errors!
post #5180 of 9325
Thread Starter 

Well, well, well


Little commodore's having trouble with his look


You little semi-demi-mini-god

post #5181 of 9325
I'll just sit here looking smug while you explode, I think.
post #5182 of 9325
Thread Starter 

you don't swing it like you used to, man.

post #5183 of 9325
Geeze, I'm sorry I said anything now.
post #5184 of 9325
Thread Starter 

I think you guys are taking my quoting Lin-Manuel lyrics in the wrong way.

 

You might say I just love free food, and you look like seafood.

post #5185 of 9325

Musicals? So bad.

post #5186 of 9325
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by MichaelM View Post
 

Musicals? So bad.

 

post #5187 of 9325

"Look pretty and do as little as possible" is my motto!

post #5188 of 9325
Quote:
Originally Posted by Carnotaur3 View Post


Haven't watched the video but the man doesn't bring anything out of her. She's the embodiment of love. He's tasked to give himself to her. Once he does, love defeats evil. That is the story. There is absolutely no need to politicize a very simple analogy.

Korben Dallas DOES bring it out of her at the end of the movie.

 

She's gone into despair over the ugliness of human history and Korben has to proclaim his love in order for her to snap out of it and shoot the DEUS EX LOVE BEAM to stop the EVIL PLANET.

post #5189 of 9325
Thread Starter 

Get 'em, nooj.

post #5190 of 9325
if you're not gonna watch the video, a least remember the movie, carnooooo!!!

I swear, I'm gonna politicize every 5th krusty burger!!!
post #5191 of 9325
It's just such a bizarrely forced and cherry-picked reading of The Fifth Element. The movie is a superhero story where the dumb sidekick, played by Bruce Willis, is the point of view character.
post #5192 of 9325

sure, but it doesn't mean that it's not using that trope

 

I don't get how it's bizarrely forced and cherry-picked.

 

GIVE ME COUNTER-EXAMPLES!!!

post #5193 of 9325
Thread Starter 

Get 'em nooj.

post #5194 of 9325
Quote:
Originally Posted by commodorejohn View Post

How about you explain the argument the video is making so I don't have to?

I'm never going to accept the notion that random people on the Internet can assign me obligatory homework to slog through before I'm allowed to voice an opinion.

 

It's only homework in that if you want to participate in a book club, you're expected to read the book.  But by all means, continue to make a principled stand on behalf of the right of the uninformed jags to have their opinions heard.

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by mcnooj82 View Post
 

Korben Dallas DOES bring it out of her at the end of the movie.

 

She's gone into despair over the ugliness of human history and Korben has to proclaim his love in order for her to snap out of it and shoot the DEUS EX LOVE BEAM to stop the EVIL PLANET.

 

So The Fifth Element is all about how even the strongest, most accomplished women need to be cuddled and told "I love you" before they can achieve orgasm?  And here I thought the French were supposed to be all sexually progressive and shit.

post #5195 of 9325

Apologies for interrupting the convo, but Jeffrey Wells apparently just broke up with his Russian mail-order bride and this is the damndest thing I've read in a while - http://www.hollywood-elsewhere.com/2017/04/rewritten-version-peter-weirs-green-card/?utm_source=dlvr.it&utm_medium=twitter 

post #5196 of 9325

"Sasha Stone woke me. She mentioned the possible rape of Nanking if I get divorced, and that sent my head into a tailspin."

 

Now that is... special.

post #5197 of 9325
Quote:
Originally Posted by Schwartz View Post
 

 

 

So The Fifth Element is all about how even the strongest, most accomplished women need to be cuddled and told "I love you" before they can achieve orgasm?  And here I thought the French were supposed to be all sexually progressive and shit.

 

well, it IS still a major hollywood movie, right?

post #5198 of 9325
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dent6084 View Post
 

"Sasha Stone woke me. She mentioned the possible rape of Nanking if I get divorced, and that sent my head into a tailspin."

 

Now that is... special.

Bonus points for Stone popping up in the comments and saying "Um, I didn't say that."

post #5199 of 9325
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mangy View Post
 

Bonus points for Stone popping up in the comments and saying "Um, I didn't say that."

 

I like Stone a lot, but listening to Jeff Wells condescend to her on a weekly basis on their Oscars podcast was painful. 

 

also really weird seeing bort post (or anyone, really) chez lindsay vids in here. 

post #5200 of 9325
Why? She's one of the better YouTube critics. Far better than the 'I can try to emulate Every Frame a Painting without the critical insight' crowd.
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