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I’m curious to see how the public will process WB’s decision to have separate film and television universes. As a dork of the depressing variety, I’ll be able to accept all of this easily, but will John Q. Moviegoer be as capable? I’m still betting that DC will drop some Multiverse mumbo-jumbo into the mix in order to explain everything away, but they’ve been adamant that that’s not the route they’re taking.

This is most confusing when it comes to The Flash. The Scarlet Speedster is currently enjoying a huge success on the small screen (and deservedly so. The CW show has been a childish delight), and I’m wondering how that will clash with the eventual big screen version. Well, if I needed proof that The Flash feature film is going to pale in comparison to the show, today’s announcement of its writer/director just sealed that deal.

THR reports that Seth Grahame-Cracker-Smith has been announced as the screenwriter and director of The Flash: Not the TV One. In case you’ve managed to avoid Grahame-Cracker-Smith’s cinematic output, let me run it down for you: he’s the author of two eye-rollingly bad books, Pride and Prejudice and Zombies and Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter that got turned/are getting turned into eye-rollingly bad movies. He was also the screenwriter behind everyone’s favorite Tim Burton movie, Dark Shadows. You know, the film that had the black magic ability of making Chloe Grace Moretz unbearable? He’s also attached to an unnecessary sequel of Beetlejuice, just in case you didn’t dislike him enough.

Obviously, I’m not a fan of the guy. I get the feeling he must be a wonderful person to be around and talk to because his writing is utterly repellent. The fact that he’s taking over The Flash gives me immense pause. Not just because he hasn’t shown chops on the writing side of things, but this film is going to be his directorial debut. A intended blockbuster film is going to be his kickoff? Say what you will about Zack Snyder or James Wan, but at least those guys have some big movies under their belt.

After thoroughly enjoying the first season of The Flash: The TV One (look for my recaps of season two starting this week!), I’m almost ready to write off this film version. With Seth One-Half-of-a-S’mores-Smith at the helm (Phil Lord & Chris Miller have been demoted to a story credit), I’ve become thoroughly disinterested. Considering I’ve been very supportive of WB’s decision to hire more unique directors for their DC films, this one has me sighing with shame.

Suicide Squad opens on August 5, 2016. There’s a DC film that seems worthy of keeping your eyes on.


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