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STAR WARS: THE FORCE AWAKENS Spoiler Thread

post #1 of 1062
Thread Starter 

There we go.

post #2 of 1062
Where my spoilers at?
post #3 of 1062
Someone who is not a lazy bastard like me, should start this by posting every single piece of concept art that has leaked so far.
post #4 of 1062
So, uh, any spoilers for the comic book? I haven't read it yet.
post #5 of 1062
Please remember to spoiler space or just watch at which point that you mention said spoilers.
post #6 of 1062
Thread Starter 

 

 

 

 

 

CREATOR: gd-jpeg v1.0 (using IJG JPEG v62), quality = 75

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

That's everything I could find.

post #7 of 1062
GLORIOUS!!!!
post #8 of 1062
Quote:
Originally Posted by JacknifeJohnny View Post

Please remember to spoiler space or just watch at which point that you mention said spoilers.


With due respect, it's in the fucking thread title.
post #9 of 1062
MAGNIFICENT!!!
post #10 of 1062
Thread Starter 

SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER

 

I have some thoughts on the villains...

 

So I've heard rumours that the chrome dome trooper pictured above is Gwendoline Christie's character who's Finn's commanding officer.  Andy Serkis does the creepy narration in the teaser talking about the force and such so I'm thinking he's actually Kylo Ren who miiiight be an Inquisitor like the one on REBELS.  

 

Which leaves us with Adam Driver...who I'm guessing is some kind of Imperial Agent who goes undercover with the Alliance.

 

So that gives us a Sith Lord with two lackeys going up against the trio of Finn, Rey and Poe.  We haven't had this many name villains in a SW movie yet.

 

And yes, I am the one nerd trying to seriously discuss Star Wars.  

post #11 of 1062
AMAZEBALLS!!!
post #12 of 1062
But honestly, that's the kind of possibly spoilers stuff I want to read.
post #13 of 1062
Er so this has happened? This thread is actually a thing?

Jesus fucking Christ.
post #14 of 1062
HOLY SHIT!!!
post #15 of 1062
Thread Starter 

You know what's the one thing that's really bugging me...

 

Are the good guys still going to be called the Rebel Alliance?  

 

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Stale Elvis View Post

Er so this has happened? This thread is actually a thing?

Jesus fucking Christ.

 

I'm a longtime fan of George R.R. Martin who's had to put up with about 4 years of this stuff with Game of Thrones and I've found it's easier to just go with it.  Otherwise this type of shit's going to come up any time a new bit of info or concept art gets leaked.

post #16 of 1062
Long live this thread. The other thread is for pussy girly men.

And thank you Codename, there were quite a few pictures I had missed somehow!
post #17 of 1062
Quote:
Originally Posted by Reasor View Post

With due respect, it's in the fucking thread title.

Work with me here, man. I can only do so much. Being a maintenance man and peacekeeper isn't always easy, especially since I hate cleaning and I'm an asshole.
post #18 of 1062
Yeah I understand the need for separate threads but why not start a non-spoiler thread?

Fuck it I'm starting one.
post #19 of 1062
The other thread is for non-spoilery bullshit.
post #20 of 1062
So we all having organised fun here in the new thread?
post #21 of 1062
No, it's just real men hanging out, talking bollocks.
post #22 of 1062
Thread Starter 

Blackjack and hookers dressed as Jawa's are in the solar.

post #23 of 1062
Considering wild speculation and rumour is the only way to have fun discussing an upcoming movie, consider me in on this thread and out of that other one (that does what, exactly?)
post #24 of 1062
We'll be up to 1,000 pages by morning.
post #25 of 1062
Quote:
Originally Posted by Codename View Post
 

SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER

 

I have some thoughts on the villains...

 

So I've heard rumours that the chrome dome trooper pictured above is Gwendoline Christie's character who's Finn's commanding officer.  Andy Serkis does the creepy narration in the teaser talking about the force and such so I'm thinking he's actually Kylo Ren who miiiight be an Inquisitor like the one on REBELS.  

 

Which leaves us with Adam Driver...who I'm guessing is some kind of Imperial Agent who goes undercover with the Alliance.

 

So that gives us a Sith Lord with two lackeys going up against the trio of Finn, Rey and Poe.  We haven't had this many name villains in a SW movie yet.

 

And yes, I am the one nerd trying to seriously discuss Star Wars.  


SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER

 

Eh, I'll be another nerd who tries to seriously discuss this shit, because why not.

 

Driver is Kylo Ren.  I'm pretty damn sure of it.  And I'm pretty sure the concept art of Vader and the troopers is supposed to be his character (word is they used some stand-in designs like Vader early on when they didn't have finalized concepts for the characters).  But yeah, I've also heard that Christie is the commander of the chrome troopers/Finn's commanding officer.  Serkis is rumored to be some weird, ancient Sith thing.  There's also a rumor that Domhnall Gleeson is a Tarkin-like character, but the rumors on him are so all-over-the-map that who knows what to believe (aside from the fact that the Spoilerman/Spoilerbro stuff from 4Chan is apparently a massive pile of bullshit).

 

But in terms of name villains...hell, this ensemble is gigantic!  The OT group alone is six characters, plus the new trio of Ridley/Boyega/Isaac, plus the villains, plus Lupita Nyong'o, plus Max Von Sydow, plus all the smaller players like the Raid guys and Pip Anderson/Christina Chong/etc.  And BB-8, of course.  This is getting to Altman-esque proporitions here.

post #26 of 1062

I can like... legit be a dick now.

 

I find myself much more fascinated by Sydow's character. Still scratching my head at what OT character he was.

 

Antilles? 

post #27 of 1062

Well, my take on the rumors is that I think Skywalker myth is being reconfigured to be a take on Arthurian myth:

 

So, Uther is Anakin, Arthur is Luke, and Kylo Ren(son of Han/Leia)is Mordred.

 

Han representes Lancelot.  Leia is Gweniverre.  

 

Finn/Rey represent Perceval.  

post #28 of 1062
Just a minute there, Ruckuss! You're missing the accidental incest!
post #29 of 1062
Quote:
Originally Posted by commodorejohn View Post

Just a minute there, Ruckuss! You're missing the accidental incest!


Oh that wasn't accidental in Arthurian myth.  But, hey its gotta be kid friendly I guess.  

post #30 of 1062
I love the idea of Leia slinging her ladyparts in between A New Hope and Empire, and there being some hydrocephalic Sith bastard of her and Luke's indiscretions out there.
post #31 of 1062
Quote:
Originally Posted by Reasor View Post

I love the idea of Leia slinging her ladyparts in between A New Hope and Empire, and there being some hydrocephalic Sith bastard of her and Luke's indiscretions out there.


I'm sure some piece of fanfic has fully explored this...

post #32 of 1062
SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER

Wasn't there a rumor floating around about Luke having so much power that he can potentially destroy worlds or whatever? Does that tie in with the other rumor about a doomsday weapon that's able to destroy solar systems? Maybe the Sith/Empire are using the heroes in this movie to track down Luke so they can drain him of his precious fluids (magic blood!!!), or use him for some other nefarious purpose?
post #33 of 1062
Maybe they've got him hooked up to a big milking machine, like Robert Duvall has hooked up over his couch in the Director's Cut of THX-1138. That would rhyme, like poetry.



post #34 of 1062
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bradito View Post

SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER

Wasn't there a rumor floating around about Luke having so much power that he can potentially destroy worlds or whatever?

SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSOMETHINGSOMETHINGDARKSIDE

Mother of fuck I hope not. Darn these overpowered heroes and/or villains to heck.
post #35 of 1062
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruckuss Zuckuss View Post

Well, my take on the rumors is that I think Skywalker myth is being reconfigured to be a take on Arthurian myth:

So, Uther is Anakin, Arthur is Luke, and Kylo Ren(son of Han/Leia)is Mordred.

Han representes Lancelot.  Leia is Gweniverre.  

Finn/Rey represent Perceval.  

Maybe von Sydow is Tim the Enchanter.
post #36 of 1062

Do we know how far into the future this one is set?  

post #37 of 1062
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bailey View Post


Maybe von Sydow is Tim the Enchanter.


I guess that soccer droid is the rabbit....

post #38 of 1062
Quote:
Originally Posted by Costco Mike View Post

Do we know how far into the future this one is set?  

Star War is set in the past, Mike. JEEZ.
post #39 of 1062
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Costco Mike View Post
 

Do we know how far into the future this one is set?  

 

30 years after ROTJ is what I have heard.

post #40 of 1062

SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER

 

 

 

 

Well, if they are going Arthurian, there's the rumored lightsaber MacGuffin as Excalibur.  And the reputed "search for Luke" could be a Fisher King-type quest.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Reasor View Post

I love the idea of Leia slinging her ladyparts in between A New Hope and Empire, and there being some hydrocephalic Sith bastard of her and Luke's indiscretions out there.


Well, now we know why they cast Adam Driver.

post #41 of 1062
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bailey View Post


Star War is set in the past, Mike. JEEZ.

 

Pfft, nerd.

post #42 of 1062
Does anybody know how close the galaxy is for the new movie?
post #43 of 1062
Does anybody know what the hell Bucho is asking about?
post #44 of 1062
FFS Bitches, will the Galaxy be just far away?, still far far away?, or even far far far away?

Basically, as the universe is continually expanding, has the Star Wars galaxy moved away from ours, or has it moved closer, or have they both moved apart or both move closer? To know this you'll have to know the initial location of the SW galaxy to our own and the basic rate of expansion of the universe and was it in flux or a constant in the last 30 years.

If you can't answer this then you don't belong in this thread and should move back to the non-spoiler thread and hang out with those other limp-dicked fuckers.

You have 30 minutes to present your answer after which I'll stop caring and turn this into a prequel-bashing thread.
post #45 of 1062
I think we broke Stale Elvis.
post #46 of 1062
This is already way more fun than the other thread.
post #47 of 1062
You won't be singing the same tune in 10,000 posts.
post #48 of 1062
Wait, are we allowed to opine about how far away the galaxy is out in the open, or do we need to spoiler text it?
post #49 of 1062

Doesn't anybody stay in one place anymore?

post #50 of 1062

I think a spoiler tag in this thread means instant banning..

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