CHUD.com Community › Forums › THE MAIN SEWER › Movie Miscellany › Worst film of 2017
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:

Worst film of 2017 - Page 2

post #51 of 125

Worst movie I've seen this year?  Hands down, LEATHERFACE.  Top to bottom, a waste of everybody's time, and yet another terrible TEXAS CHAINSAW movie.

 

The movie that fails the most to achieve its potential?  THE CIRCLE.  A ludicrously soft presentation of what could (and should) have been an absolutely savage indictment of social media culture and the ways in which it seduces people to give up more and more of their personal privacy.  A better title for the film would have been PUNCHES PULLED: THE MOTION PICTURE.

post #52 of 125
Oh fuck....I forgot about Leatherface. That was hooooooooorible.

On an unrelated note....I was in shock at how much I enjoyed Power Rangers. And I can't even chalk that one up to nostalgia in any way whatsoever..
post #53 of 125
Quote:
Originally Posted by Belloq87 View Post

 

The movie that fails the most to achieve its potential?  THE CIRCLE.  A ludicrously soft presentation of what could (and should) have been an absolutely savage indictment of social media culture and the ways in which it seduces people to give up more and more of their personal privacy.  A better title for the film would have been PUNCHES PULLED: THE MOTION PICTURE.

 

Can you spoil the ending here? I read the book and it was atrocious. Curious if they kept the ending, but I'm not going to sit through it.

post #54 of 125
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fraid uh noman View Post

How Transformers (even one of the more head scratching ones) getting called the WORST OF THE YEAR....especially when something like The Dark Tower (and that's pushing it) is lurking around out there. Covenent as well. I envy those that live such interesting lives that some solidly cool movies are just hand waved away. It seems kinda silly that it takes something like Fury Road or Logan for people to not decry it as the death of cinema.

Scratch that....my vote is Flatliners. Poor Ellen Page. Such a cutie. My future wife in that imaginary land in my head where she's not happily in a relationship with a girlfriend frown.gif

Dark Tower is a bad adaptation fueled by the same PG13 greed/exec stupidity we have seen countless times before.

Covenant is a bad film in a series thats been in the gutter for decades now.

Transformers 5 is everything wrong with Hollywood financially, morally and creatively, and its the 5th time it was allowed to be made.

Dark Tower and Covenant are a mid rush and the flu. Transformers 5 is weaponized smallpox.

post #55 of 125
Quote:
Originally Posted by bendrix View Post
 

 

Can you spoil the ending here? I read the book and it was atrocious. Curious if they kept the ending, but I'm not going to sit through it.

Warning: Spoiler! (Click to show)
Emma Watson's character - with the help of a wasted John Boyega in a nothing role - leaks sensitive internal documents, financial accounts, and correspondences (which are embarrassing for Tom Hanks' character) to the public. 

It's presented as Hanks getting his just desserts, but the movie stages this development in front of an audience of cheering, Circle-using sheep... WHO HAVEN'T LEARNED A GODDAMN THING ABOUT WHY THE CIRCLE IS TERRIBLE!  They just mindlessly cheer that Hanks has gone "fully transparent," and they listen in rapt attention as Watson preaches for the end of privacy.

It's so LAME!  No lessons are learned by anybody, and any satire the movie seems to be attempting is utterly toothless.

post #56 of 125
Quote:
Originally Posted by Belloq87 View Post
  Warning: Spoiler! (Click to show)
Emma Watson's character - with the help of a wasted John Boyega in a nothing role - leaks sensitive internal documents, financial accounts, and correspondences (which are embarrassing for Tom Hanks' character) to the public. 

It's presented as Hanks getting his just desserts, but the movie stages this development in front of an audience of cheering, Circle-using sheep... WHO HAVEN'T LEARNED A GODDAMN THING ABOUT WHY THE CIRCLE IS TERRIBLE!  They just mindlessly cheer that Hanks has gone "fully transparent."

It's so LAME!

 

Apart from Watson's character, no lessons are learned by anybody.

 

Yeah, in the book...

 

Warning: Spoiler! (Click to show)
Watson's character is completely corrupted and just goes along with everything to help advance her career in The Circle.
post #57 of 125
Quote:
Originally Posted by bendrix View Post
 

 

Yeah, in the book...

 

Warning: Spoiler! (Click to show)
Watson's character is completely corrupted and just goes along with everything to help advance her career in The Circle.


The movie could have used a bleak, cynical denouement like that, instead of the very confused, mixed-messages-sending climax we get, because at least that would have felt like a statement.

post #58 of 125

Watson's post HP career choices are quite baffling, to be honest.

Colonia, Regression and The Circle were all bad or awful, and Beauty and the Beast wasnt exactly a masterpiece, BO aside

Has she been in anything good since then?

post #59 of 125
Quote:
Originally Posted by ryoken View Post
 

Watson's post HP career choices are quite baffling, to be honest.

Colonia, Regression and The Circle were all bad or awful, and Beauty and the Beast wasnt exactly a masterpiece, BO aside

Has she been in anything good since then?

I was a big fan of Noah.

post #60 of 125

She's great in My Week with Marilyn, The Perks of Being a Wallflower, and her brief role in This is the End. But those were all about five years ago. 

 

Beauty and the Beast signals she wanted to buy a pool.

post #61 of 125
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bartleby_Scriven View Post
 

The Perks of Being a Wallflower

She's really good in this one, definitely.  It's quite an underrated movie overall, too.

 

Her other choices have been admirably eclectic, but I don't think she's been a great fit for most of them, nor have most of them been particularly good.  NOAH's a fascinating - if moderately unsatisfying - effort, while something like REGRESSION is just bizarre, a movie that simultaneously wants to be a certain kind of story (Satanic Panic in a small town!) and also desperately tries to avoid delivering that at every turn.  Watson was particularly miscast in that one.

post #62 of 125

Most generic target audience product of the year: American Assassin, which may be based on a series of books, but comes off as completely uninspired dollar bin fare (Keaton is good though and I did like Brien in Maze Runner)
Worst "look at this highbrow arthouse" movie: The Bad Batch, a few interesting aspects in a drawn out borefest
Worst movie that actually ended up pretty good and entertaining, considering what was expected: Monster Trucks, Power Rangers, Sandy Wexler, The House
Worst scene involving Dax Shepard in a motion picture: Pená carrying a nude Shepard, only to stumble and fall with his face onto Shepards genitals

Most disgusting scene: pretty much anything Helen does in Wetlands, most of all willfully tearing her butthole skin so that she can stay longer in the hospital to flirt
Worst special FX in an expensive movie aside from Moustache-Gate: I thought about the visibly unfinished zombie shark sequence of Pirates 5, but I say the Atlantis scene of JL.
Worst "joke": the Kingsman vagina scene comes close, but I'd say Schumer lifting her leg and washing her ladyparts which gets seen by her date in Snatched

Worst movie of the year: The Bye Bye Man
The most stupid, lifeless garbage I have seen in years. It makes Leatherface and Rings look like watchable movies.

I still need to experience the many wonders of GEOSTORM.

post #63 of 125
Geostorm is fun.

I don't get the American Assassin backlash. I dug it.
post #64 of 125
Oh man, forgot until I was listening to the podcast about Baywatch. What a horrible, unfunny, trying to pull a 21 Jump Street pile of hot garbage.
post #65 of 125
This is the unofficial year of "Oh, I forgot about that one!" films.
post #66 of 125
hahaha THE CIRCLE ends with Watson on a rowboat looking into a drone camera or something

"hello"

what a nothing movie!
post #67 of 125
The Circle was pretty awful. Geostorm has a gloriously stupid 3rd act that “saves” the movie, but the first hour is just mostly dull. I would agree with Flynn that Monster Trucks and Power Rangers, while not good, were better than they had any right to be. I would add Unforgettable (the Rosario Dawson/Katherine Heigl thriller) to that list, too. I would disagree about The House and Sandy Wexler, both of which I found to be fairly awful.

I think most of the other bad movies I saw this year have already been mentioned, but I would also throw in Fifty Shades Darker (which is much worse than the first, imo) and The Only Living Boy in New York, which has one of the most ludicrous twists I have seen in a recent film.
post #68 of 125
This is what MoviePass is doing, it's compelling you to sit through Monster Trucks.
post #69 of 125
How about A Monster Calls? Helped or hurt by Bipedal Neeson instead of Truck Neeson?
post #70 of 125

Circle is so strange in that it feels like a good 30-45 minutes is cut out of the movie. What in the blue hell did Watson even "expose" on Hanks at the end?

post #71 of 125
Quote:
Originally Posted by MisterPhil View Post
 

Circle is so strange in that it feels like a good 30-45 minutes is cut out of the movie. What in the blue hell did Watson even "expose" on Hanks at the end?


All of his "accounts."  Even the "secret" ones!

 

It's dumb.

post #72 of 125

Underworld: Blood Wars. Braindead tedium.

The Last Word. In self-indulgent late-career low-budget vanity projects? Maybe, but I didn't see Max Rose.

Valerian. The Dane of my existence.

post #73 of 125
Valerian looked like everything I'm tired of seeing in movies.
post #74 of 125

These are the movies that were so bad I only watched the first 20 minutes:

 

The Void

Transformers 5

The Mummy

Kingsman 2 (And I liked Kingsman 1)

Ghost in the Shell (Maybe only 5/10 minutes on this one)

Valerian - this is the biggest disapointment because I never made it to the Rihanna part.  That's two shitty Rihanna movies in a row, hopefully Ocean's 8 will work.

 

Movies I got about half-way and gave up:

Beauty and the Beast, American Made

 

Didn't see Baby Boss, 50 Shades, The Circle, Pirates.

 

Movies I liked: Dunkirk, Logan, Wonder Woman, Blade Runner, Big Sick, It

Biggest surprise: American Assassin - it fucking rules

post #75 of 125
Finally, another American Assassin champion.
post #76 of 125

Also, Fast 8 was pretty shitty.

 

Looking at how long that list is of shitty movies is, I'm kinda glad I missed the JL.  It will be on TV in like a couple months anyway.

post #77 of 125
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bradito View Post

Finally, another American Assassin champion.

 

I mean, it's really not that kid's fault that he's too skinny or that he has a shitty haircut.  It's just wall to wall Rated-R action and shitty dialogue and good looking people kicking the snot out of each other.  Reminded me of Shooter actually.  I loved it.

post #78 of 125
Quote:
Originally Posted by FilmNerdJamie View Post

Although Alien: Covenant came close, it's an easy call. Kingsman: The Golden Circle.

Offensive in how it treats those of us who dug The Secret Service with its slap-in-the-face treatment to death, mortality and thus stakes. Two characters who were dead with a capital D return for The Golden Circle. Yet has the nerve to sell the death of a major character here with a straight face after they've shown how inconsequential "dying" in this franchise is. 

But mostly taking the key criticism of the original (the juvenile humor) and amping it to 11. Having your hero plant a tracking device up a girl's vagina is repulsive. On a skin-crawling "Who the fuck approved this" level. If Michael Bay did this, God damn would the Internet and the SJW crowd have grown tumors. But because Vaughn is still considered a favorite, it got a free-pass.

When Channing Tatum dancing for 10 seconds and an extended Elton John cameo are the highlights of your big two-and-a-half hour sequel, you know you're in trouble. Fuck Vaughn, fuck this movie.

I skipped this movie, but I didn't hear any of this. I thought the first was repulsive, so no surprise Vaughn doubles down on it.
post #79 of 125
Quote:
Originally Posted by WendellEverett View Post
 

Movies I got about half-way and gave up:

American Made

 

Jeez! Tough crowd in here.

 

You didn't even make it to the part where we find out Tom Cruise is a replicant?

post #80 of 125
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bradito View Post

Valerian looked like everything I'm tired of seeing in movies.

DEAD TO ME!!!

for one minute
post #81 of 125

I've got my bets on this for 2018!

 

post #82 of 125
Quote:
Originally Posted by User_32 View Post

I've got my bets on this for 2018!



They sure are taking Blade 4 in a weird direction.
post #83 of 125

from the youtube thumbnail, I thought that was a LOLA'ed up Chastain!!

 

PATRICK SCHWARZENEGGER???

post #84 of 125

You've all been dragging on American Assassin and I thought you meant American Sniper. 

post #85 of 125

The Circle made me angry it was so very, very bad. 

Tom Hanks? WTF?

Other really bad movies I saw this year were Kong: Skull Island and some other shit I forget. I prefer to talk about good movies I saw. Like Colossal. Anybody see it?

post #86 of 125

I think Skull Island and Colossal would make a good double feature.

post #87 of 125
I fell asleep during the Mummy. Twice. But, I still think mother! was worse.
post #88 of 125
Mother is one of those pretentious experiments that have value and merit on effort alone.
The Mummy, on the other hand, is a text example of how not to remake a film.
post #89 of 125
Thread Starter 
post #90 of 125
Quote:
Originally Posted by felix View Post
 

The AV Club's Top 20 Worst List is up

The Last Face is on Amazon Prime, and I've been sorely tempted to check it out.

post #91 of 125
Thread Starter 
post #92 of 125
Not sure whose bright idea it was to give Ayers such a big chunk of change. His stuff is horrible.
post #93 of 125
Quote:
Originally Posted by Subotai View Post

Not sure whose bright idea it was

Oh snap. I get it.
post #94 of 125
post #95 of 125
Yow. How do you start with that premise and not just go "fuck it" and make a Shadowrun movie?
post #96 of 125
Quote:
Originally Posted by Subotai View Post

Not sure whose bright idea it was to give Ayers such a big chunk of change. His stuff is horrible.

 

Bright was originally developed at Warner Brothers (while Suicide Squad was in post-production). No way the studio would have let that slip away if it was any good.

post #97 of 125
Quote:
Originally Posted by commodorejohn View Post


Yow. How do you start with that premise and not just go "fuck it" and make a Shadowrun movie?

 

It's thinking like that that got us Starship Troopers.

post #98 of 125
Quote:
Originally Posted by Subotai View Post

Not sure whose bright idea it was to give Ayers such a big chunk of change. His stuff is horrible.

End of Watch, Fury and Street Kings are pretty good. But I don't know how do you go from those into big budget fantasy blockbusters. And when Ayer's bad, he's insufferable. The first 30 minutes of Dark Blue is the most David Ayerest thing ever Ayer'd.
post #99 of 125
Nice move, Netflix. The money spent on this crap could have paid for another season of Sense8.
post #100 of 125

Schindler's List parody with Reed Hastings surrounded by the casts of The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, Arrested Development, Longmire, The Killing and Gilmore Girls.  In his hand he's clutching a film reel labeled "Bright".

 

"This film. Tsujihara would have bought this film. Why did I keep the film? Ten episodes of Terriers right there. Ten episodes. Ten more episodes."

New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:
  Return Home
  Back to Forum: Movie Miscellany
CHUD.com Community › Forums › THE MAIN SEWER › Movie Miscellany › Worst film of 2017